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I fell in love with my best friend

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So I got this girl and she's my best friend but for the past couple of months we've been texting each other, we've texted before but not like this I was feeling down about myself about how ugly I feel and she was being a good grand said that I'm not ugly that she would go out with me in a heartbeat, now I've had feelings for her but I didn't think she felt the same so my feelings weren't that strong. So fast forward and our messages get more deeply she tells me that she was in love with me and she has been for awhile but didn't think I was interested and I told her that I'm in love with her to. But here's the problem she is happily married to another one of my close friends, we want each other but we can't do that to her husband. But when I'm around her every thing feels so right, I don't want to lose her as my best friend but it hurts to see her with him and I don't know what to do.

 

Additional Comments:

Oops that was suppose to be good friend, not good grand.

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.... but we can't do that to her husband.

 

As painful as it is, it sounds like you have already made your decision. Life is full of bad timing situations, and often we have to live with that. Now you just need the strength to stick to your decision. Staying "good friends" with either of them is not going to help you to achieve it. There is no point in being noble if you hang around to cause problems for them anyway. If she is in fact "happily married" as you have said, then you know what you have to do.

 

Good luck

Mikey

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Guest *Ste***cque**

Since you say you don't know what to do and are posting this here, I'll give you my opinion.

 

You admitted your feelings for her weren't that strong until you realized she had strong feelings toward you. OK, so back off and find someone else.

 

People falling in love tend to rationalize their actions and feel like they are "meant to be" but falling in love is easy. Staying in love takes hard work and commitment. The kind of commitment that starts with getting married, which is what this girl and your close friend decided to do. Allow them the chance to build something strong. If it doesn't work out between them and they get divorced(without anyone incentivizing them) and you are still available, go for it. You may find your feelings have changed with time though. Until then, leave them be. You wouldn't like it if he or someone else did that to you.

 

You'll be fine. There are lots of fish in the sea.

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Guest *ass**x

If she is truly in love with you then she is not happily married. If she is willing to leave her husband and you really feel for this woman then you should do it. Her relationship is dead anyway. If she is not willing to leave her husband it may be she is looking to fool around but in that instance I would recommend you back away and let them work it out. It is not worth it to sacrifice a friend for a few rolls in the hay only to find out it was just lust on her side (or yours)....

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Ask yourself: "How would a tryst end?"

When it comes to 3-way relationships, the answer is nearly always: "Badly".

 

Best of luck.

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Life can be such a mind f*** eh! Yes you are in a very bad situation not being able to be with the one that was meant for you..lol! But then again new love can do that to a person, best advice..... wait! if her marriage goes flat then the door is wide open but then again time changes everything!

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Guest st*****ens**ors

Stevemcqueen has given you excellent advice. Walk away for now, and if it's meant to be you may have an opportunity after her own relationship has run its course, without betraying your friendship.

 

Best wishes

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walk away ... best possible advise. Tell her that if she does, in fact, want you, then she needs to sort things out with her partner. If she really wants you, she will. then you are free to follow your heart. If she doesn't, then you'll know. You might still lose your friend, but at least you can say that you didn't betray him by having an affair with his wife when they were still married.

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