winerdiner 61 Report post Posted May 11, 2019 (edited) Another perspective but much the same. I've been hobbying for 2-3 years. My wife is totally disinterested in sex. When we first met 9 years ago we were like rabbits and 3 times a day, for about 3 months. She was just beginning menopause at the time and as it progressed with night sweats, mood changes, body changes, thermostat too high or two low all the time, our sex life dwindled to nothing. It's called the change of life for a reason and it certainly changed our sex life. At first I took that very personally, and I was angry, mostly at myself. She also had some hang-ups about sex after her previous marriage and some things that happened to her when she was very young. I've come to accept it, realize that begging or pressuring don't work so here I am. When I started hobbying I felt guilt because I'm not a cheater and I felt like I was totally cheating. I've changed my perspective that way. I can love her, respect her, care for and about her, support her and be faithful. On top of that I can help certain ladies that I like and contribute to their life style in some way. That allows me to give sexually and to love at home. I've seen a few SP's, some are worthy of the giving. At the same time I can love my wife. Lessons learned! Edited May 11, 2019 by winerdiner 1 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zoneman 355 Report post Posted May 13, 2019 I had this really really long post written out and I felt it might have been too much so here is the TLDR version. Many reasons why people do what they do, the thrill of it, lack of intimacy at home, or maybe just maybe they have permission. I had permission once, not sure I still do. I try not to get into my personal situation when I see an escort, I wont lie to her if she asks, but only a few have asked. I don't wear a wedding ring (mine is way too heavy) so I don't have a tan line so its not immediately obvious if I do or not. I always wonder if a woman would look at me differently if she knew. Anyway, life is what you make it. Some may label you a cheater, some people just don't care. Everyone's relationship is different and some people think of it as a huge betrayal, some don't, just look at it as sex and nothing more. C'est la vie. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
