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      I doubt that information was publicly posted. But even in PM, this kind of private and detailed information shouldn't be shared.  Hopefully an isolated incident and not a regular occurrence. 

      Also, on a few occasions I seen ladies accidently doxing themselves by using pictures or email addresses from private social media accounts. Reason why one shouldn't mix private and public information.

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Whoa, thats crazy, I'm sorry that happened to you.

 

I figured it was common amongst the members that the privacy of providers was sacred and location information especially was not to be discussed.

 

 

 

 

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I agree with your feelings about this Melanie.  I think that the mods should move this thread to a "Across Canada" and not just Nova Scotia.

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So sorry this happened to you Melanie Rose. This is completely unacceptable - no one but the the Provider should be giving out addresses. I will move this thread to all of Canada as per @NotchJohnson's suggestion as people need to be aware. I can't believe that anyone could think this was okay to do! 

giphy.gif

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16 minutes ago, Jessica Rain said:

I would be losing my shit. I work in my personal private home. 
 

if I found out someone was sharing that info publicly or privately, I would be taking issue. I would be banning the person, posting all their info on every black site I could find. 
 

Totally not acceptable. I'm very sorry this happened to you. 

    To be clear, she never said her exact address was shared. Only the street name.

Even if a bit too precise for some, it doesn't justify "posting all their info on every black site" because one shared that info with a few members.

     Lack of judgement I agree, but not worth destroying someone's life for it.

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21 minutes ago, Greenteal said:

    To be clear, she never said her exact address was shared. Only the street name.

Even if a bit too precise for some, it doesn't justify "posting all their info on every black site" because one shared that info with a few members.

     Lack of judgement I agree, but not worth destroying someone's life for it.

Posting any location information is a complete breach and therefore a blacklisting offence. 
 

I stand by my post. I would be posting all his info on every black site to ensure no other lady is put at risk. He is not losing his life and it is not being "destroyed" You are being dramatic about that. I didn't say I would publicly out the person. Black sites are private. 
 

Would you like a few unknown escorts knowing where you live? I think not. 
 

I work out of my personal home. I am not screwing around and having my life put at actual risk. I can be physically stalked, hurt, etc by whoever it was, telling the wrong person. It only takes once. 
 

This is why I screen. If you are going to get my personal residence location, I'm am getting your phone number, email, real name etc. Quid pro quo and if you breach that, then you live with being blacklisted. Period. 

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1 minute ago, Jessica Rain said:

This is why I screen. If you are going to get my personal residence location, I'm am getting your phone number, email, real name etc. Quid pro quo and if you breach that, then you live with being blacklisted. Period. 

  In my book, being doxed in "black sites" doesn't only get one blacklisted, but also exposed to blackmail and far more serious consequences.

 The punishment needs to fit the crime. And in this case, (from what was posted) only the general location was shared.

 If someone doxes you, I get your point and would understand your response to it. But for the situation describe by Melanie, I don't think it's necessary to go that far.

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1 minute ago, Greenteal said:

  In my book, being doxed in "black sites" doesn't only get one blacklisted, but also exposed to blackmail and far more serious consequences.

 The punishment needs to fit the crime. And in this case, (from what was posted) only the general location was shared.

 If someone doxes you, I get your point and would understand your response to it. But for the situation describe by Melanie, I don't think it's necessary to go that far.


We will have to agree to disagree. Not like having my location can't set me up for blackmail as well. 
 

Give me a street and I can locate anyone. I can then get their name, plate numbers and vehicle information, spouse info, kid info, friends and family, work, etc. It doesn't take much. 
 

Again, it is my private home. But I get that you would put more emphasis on protecting clients over sex workers. That is generally how you feel about clients vrs escorts anyway. 

 

I stand by my post. If that means someone won't see me because of it, good. I want like minded clients anyways and if someone thought my safety is less important then someone who breached my trust like this, then we will not get along anyway. 

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I'm not quite clear on the specific of what happened here but I think that Melanie said that her exact location was given to her new clients from another member from Lyla, am I right?

If her exact location was given to the new client, who is to be blacklisted?  The new client, the Lyla member or both? 

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2 minutes ago, Jessica Rain said:

Again, it is my private home. But I get that you would put more emphasis on protecting clients over sex workers. That is generally how you feel about clients vrs escorts anyway. 

   It's not about "clients over sex workers". It's about proportional responses to a clear lack of judgement.

   You can't compare privately sharing a street name to a few members with publicly exposing someone. I agree the matter should be investigated by the mods if more to the story. And if justified, the member should receive infraction or ban for PM abuse.

   Doesn't matter if client or provider, consequences are the same.

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3 minutes ago, NotchJohnson said:

I'm not quite clear on the specific of what happened here but I think that Melanie said that her exact location was given to her new clients from another member from Lyla, am I right?

If her exact location was given to the new client, who is to be blacklisted?  The new client, the Lyla member or both? 

   I suppose it depends if the new client demanded that information or was simply given to him. Something for the mods to decide.

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I agree if someone other than myself gave out my location wether its just the street or not would be  a reason to take action...thats just not something you do!!!!!

Banned blacklisted whatever!

 

 

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16 minutes ago, MelanieRose said:

I have no clue who shared it as the person who it was shared to didn't tell me exactly who, only that it was someone on Lyla. If I knew who I would have messaged them directly but maybe they will see this post.  A street name is very specific, especially if it's a street with say 20 homes, it wouldn't be hard for somebody to drive down the street and spot a person sitting outside or walking down the street and follow them home or something. I do realize most people already know this, (SP's not to share clients personal info and clients not to share SP's) Just wanted to put it out there in case maybe the right eyes see it 

They had no right to do that!  And if someone thinks this is ok then they need to give their damn head a shake..we are supose to respect each others boundaries and personal space

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56 minutes ago, Greenteal said:

   It's not about "clients over sex workers". It's about proportional responses to a clear lack of judgement.

   You can't compare privately sharing a street name to a few members with publicly exposing someone. I agree the matter should be investigated by the mods if more to the story. And if justified, the member should receive infraction or ban for PM abuse.

   Doesn't matter if client or provider, consequences are the same.

The black sites are private not public. I said that already. I'm not sharing bad date information on twitter. 
 

My location is already comprised at this point and was shared privately so I see it as a proportional response. I'm privately sharing my experience of the breach. 
 

 

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I am sorry you are having to deal with this @MelanieRose. It's never easy and feels awful.  If you need anything, you are always welcome to reach out. 💗

 

Having to deal with this currently. It's not a comfortable place to be in. We like to protect our spaces so everyone can maintain safety, discretion and privacy for everyone involved.

 

We need to be aware that Lyla is no longer a small nit community. They are advertising far and wide. With that comes way more traffic. Yay for buisness! It also brings more people that have intent to hurt, and harm people, both providers and clients. We need to be cautious at all times. 

There is a strong team of mods here but they are still people on the other side of a device. They can't be everywhere at all times. We need to use our common sense and information that isn't yours to share shouldn't be. 

 

Stephanie 💖

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    To be clear, sharing that information was wrong.

  But in my opinion, what was said and in what context matters.

  Most cases of doxing are maliciously done with the intent of damaging ones reputation. But in this case, we seen no evidence of that. As far as we know, he could be one of Melanie's most generous patrons who accidently dropped that information while writing a private recommendation. But we also don't know that. This could only be clarified if the member in question privately explained himself and apologized to her.

  I certainly understand how unsettling the situation can be and hopefully Melanie will soon get answers and some peace of mind.

 

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THANK YOU for mentioning this! 

I am a lady who adores keeping things as private as posssible.

This is a great reminder to all that we deserve privacy, discresion and safety as well.

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I had a gentleman recently give me the exact address of 2 new SPs (who share a location.) I was furious and told him not very nicely, that info like that does not ever get shared and he just proved how untrustworthy he was. I wish I could remember the names of the girls... but if you share your location spot with anyone, be careful... not all girls screen the same. 

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20 hours ago, Greenteal said:

    To be clear, sharing that information was wrong.

  But in my opinion, what was said and in what context matters.

  Most cases of doxing are maliciously done with the intent of damaging ones reputation. But in this case, we seen no evidence of that. As far as we know, he could be one of Melanie's most generous patrons who accidently dropped that information while writing a private recommendation. But we also don't know that. This could only be clarified if the member in question privately explained himself and apologized to her.

  I certainly understand how unsettling the situation can be and hopefully Melanie will soon get answers and some peace of mind.

 

An apology isnt going to change the fact that he gave out her location without her consent...no excuse for it wether it be someone she sees on a regular or not!

I do not understand how you do not find this wrong...seems as if you are making an excuse for this person vs seeing how wrong it was

You just dont do that period!

 

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2 minutes ago, Exotic Touch Danielle said:

An apology isnt going to change the fact that he gave out her location without her consent...no excuse for it wether it be someone she sees on a regular or not!

 

     I completely understand that. But it's up to her and anyone else in that situation to make that decision. Everyone make mistakes and it's more often due to ignorance than actual malice.

     Hopefully this thread will educate the members in question and anyone else unaware of the consequences from sharing that kind of information.

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On 5/24/2020 at 1:18 PM, Greenteal said:

    To be clear, sharing that information was wrong. That's true

  But in my opinion, what was said and in what context matters. Nope. Wrong is wrong period

  Most cases of doxing are maliciously done with the intent of damaging ones reputation. But in this case, we seen no evidence of that. We're not a court, we're the internet: see comment above. As far as we know, he could be one of Melanie's most generous patrons who accidently dropped that information while writing a private recommendation. Clearly not a 'private reco' then: whatever that means.  But we also don't know that. This could only be clarified if the member in question privately explained himself and apologized to her. Doesn't help. Melanie was obviously creeped out by this or she wouldn't have started this thread.

  I certainly understand (your comments indicate you don't) how unsettling the situation can be (is) and hopefully Melanie will soon get answers and some peace of mind. Not holding my breath, though my thoughts are with her.

 

My experience, here in Ottawa, has been that most providers only offer location during an immediate pre-meeting phone call. Doesn't offer complete discretion but does limit the risk of that being easily and inappropriately shared.

At this stage I'll choose not to comment further, (oh yeah, I've got waaay more thoughts on this but they stray too close the edge of lyla rules) so I'll simply post two video links: one from Arlo Guthrie and the other from the Canadian treasure, Willie P. Bennet. I've shared WPB with Greenteal before but the message hasn't been recognized. Willie and I shared harmonicas at the Ottawa Folk festival back in the late 90's (something that doesn't happen these days!) : Anyway two good questions to address. I know where I stand. I do, and always will, stand with my sex worker friends

 

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On 5/24/2020 at 9:41 AM, NotchJohnson said:

I'm not quite clear on the specific of what happened here but I think that Melanie said that her exact location was given to her new clients from another member from Lyla, am I right?

If her exact location was given to the new client, who is to be blacklisted?  The new client, the Lyla member or both? 

Both. No dispute or discussion.

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