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An Interview With... Lydia Hardwood on being a Lyla Mod

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Guest lydiahardwood

Hey guys! I asked you guys who you’d like to see interviewed and I was so honoured to be suggested as an interviewee. So, this one is a little different to others. I must admit I feel like a mad woman talking to herself, haha! I’ve included the questions asked by @Sharpe, @SarahAlexxx@StephanieMystique and @roamingguy but also added a few of my own. If you have any further questions please feel free to comment on here and I’ll get back to you. ❤️ 

Q: Lydia Hardwood, who even ARE you?!
A: First up I should probably admit that’s not my real name. I’m actually called Caroline! Lydia Hardwood was a name I came up with when signing up to Lyla. Lydia is kinda like Lyla, Hardwood is… well, I wanted something subtly raunchy and that’s the best I could come up with lol. I’m 26 and originally from London in the UK. I’ve worked in social media and community management for a few years and have worked with Lyla since February 2020. So far it’s been the best job I’ve ever had, mostly thanks to you guys.

Q: Did you work within the adult industry before?
A: A little, yes! When I was 18 I met a fantastic lady who was a professional Domme. I learnt a lot from her and started helping with her advertising. This is where my love and respect for the community started. I also do some modelling and a lot of the photographers and models I work with are within the adult niche, so I’ve been fairly well acquainted with it. 

Q: Have you ever considered buying/selling services?
A: Absolutely! I’ve not done FSSW but I’ve dabbled in other areas. As for purchasing, I’ve not done that yet but it’s something I would definitely consider if the opportunity arose. Especially looking at the Providers in Canada, phewwwwwww!

Q: What’s your favourite part of Lyla?
A: The members here are feminists, respectful and all round incredible people. I can’t tell you how refreshing that is compared to the toxic culture that’s all too prevalent on other sex work boards and forums. My morals and values are incredibly important to me and I wouldn’t support or work for a brand that wasn’t aligned with them. So to find Lyla and see first hand how positive it is for the community is just amazing. Feminism and supporting sex workers has been a cause close to my heart for a very long time but I never knew I’d be fortunate enough to have a job like this.

Q: What are your core values and why?
I’m a firm believer in live and let live. I’m not a judgemental person; if no one is being harmed or disrespected then you do you! I’m also a big believer in being open, listening to others and learning from their experiences to address your own unconscious biases. Unfortunately I do come across a lot of SWERFS who strongly believe that sex work is supporting the patriarchy, but I think the only way to truly overcome this is by having open discussion about it and raising points that they may not have thought of. 

I think a lot of these strong values come from how I was brought up - I was raised in a very strict cult that was homophobic, sexist and bigoted to say the least. From a young age what they taught just didn’t sit right with me and I was forever getting myself in trouble by calling it out, haha. I don’t think they were prepared for a fiery, bisexual, 14 year old feminist. They very much taught that you shouldn’t rely on your own gut feeling, just read the Bible, don’t have pre-marital sex, don’t be aware of your own sexuality, don’t answer back if you’re a woman, don’t question the rules. And I was like “nah, if this is what your god wants then I don’t wanna dedicate my life to serving him”. One thing that has always stuck with me too is their demonisation of sex workers. In their publications they talk about “the Whore of Babylon'' and I remember all of these beautiful illustrations of her drinking wine sitting on the back of a big cat with multiple heads. I think it had the opposite effect of what they intended cos I remember being like “she looks badass, I wanna be like her when I grow up”. I’m actually getting a tattoo of her in a couple months time, lol. Sorry, Mom.

VZA-4srVNwJFYdF-pt9bKtN2v8-7H_j-FaY_G-Seq2aTLRMelZbQcPYa7Xqw1AeJ2P48EnMxGG-sDPixUDqedtkgqLFeOhcSMnnSoqO0lWOMEUyn97223gOWTDPlsfRl8gpHuC-v

Q: How does being part of the community better your life?
A: It’s educated me. Big time. As I said before, if you wanna help a community the first thing you should do is listen to them. That’s why I started these interviews; if I’m going to be working for you guys I need to know what is important to you and what we can do to improve and break stigma in the industry. So thank you for that, especially @Daysha Love , @SarahAlexxx, @Kitten, @kyliekarma, @Berlin Moss, @StephanieMystique and @roamingguy for your insight so far.

Q: What do you think is the toughest part of your job?
A: Seeing people get disrespected/outed/hurt and not being able to do much about it. @StephanieMystique went through it recently and spoke about it in her interview. She was so brave and strong throughout it all, why anyone would want to do that to someone is beyond me. At least if someone makes a misogynistic comment you can tell them to get lost, but attacking someone personally in that way? Unforgivable.

Q: If you could change one thing about sex work, what would it be?
A: Decriminalise it everywhere, for workers and clients. Give sex workers more opportunities to speak on topics that are important to them. I think these two things would make a tremendous difference in reducing stigma and making the industry safer for everyone.

Q: What is your biggest goal/ambition for Lyla?
A: We want to be the number one sex work board in Canada. That’s the first goal. But if we’re dreaming big… I’d love to see Lyla go international. What’s stopping us from being the biggest sex work community in the world? For me it’s not just to do with traffic or engagement. Imagine if our community’s voices are amplified so much that we literally change laws and make life better for sex workers everywhere? I remember going to a seminar by a photographer called Robin Hammond from National Geographic where he did a campaign called #whereloveisillegal. He photographed different LGBTQ+ people from around the world where homosexuality is illegal and it got such a good response that some men in Nigeria were released from prison. I may be dreaming big, but that’s the kind of change I want to be part of, and I think with the right attitude and hard work it’s absolutely achievable.

Q: What was the change and motivation to bring Lyla back to life?
A: As many of you know it was sold over a year ago, which is when it went a bit dead. But now that we have a team in place we are pouring in time and effort to make it even bigger and better than before! We even have a developer working behind the scenes to improve the UX of the site, so expect some positive changes.

Q: Have you ever admined/modded a board before?
A: Nope! This is the first. My background is in social media, mainly paid Facebook advertising and content creation. This was very new to me, I’ve not even been active on a board before. It’s been a big learning curve.

Q: Why did you keep the Lyla mantra of “if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all”? Was there pressure to change it?
A: Not at all. Luckily the whole team is very supportive of the community - none of us have time for toxic review board culture, in fact we actively oppose it. Our mantra is what separates us from the rest - I can guarantee that will never change.

That’s it from me, I hope you enjoyed learning a little more about me. As always, if you need anything from me/have any questions my inbox is always open. Big love!

 

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Guest lydiahardwood
Just now, vegeta85 said:

Loved this! You are gorgeous by the way! 💓

Aww thank you! ❤️ 

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Yes it's true Lydia you are a gorgeous woman, I did see your picture before with you on a motorcycle and that one too was amazing.  Being a biker myself I do appreciate all ladies that participate in the same hobby as myself.

So I wanted to thank @roamingguy, @SarahAlexxx, @Sharpe and @StephanieMystique for the wonderful question to our interviewed guest and administrator @lydiahardwood.

Is it too late for me to change my last name to "Hardwood" because that would describe me perfectly. j/k

BTW Lydia you have a million dollar smile, gorgeous face and beautiful hair color and your eyes are alluring !

I'm not trying to use a cheesy line on you, just being honest that's all.

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Guest lydiahardwood

Ahh you guys are too good to me! This is why I love my job so much ❤️ 

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Thank You Lydia for agreeing to be interviewed and "sharing" a bit of yourself with us.  If this was like the old days of CERB/Lyla your interview would very likely get "Nominated" (Big Checkmark) and win "Topic Of The Fortnight" too

I think it's safe to say we all like you as Mod Lydia, and the work you and the rest of the team do for us here.  Even more impressive is it's your first run at being "Admin" on a board, from the way you've done things I thought you were seasoned experienced veteran.

And I agree with the others who say you're a knock out...you're a knock out

A rambling

RG

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Lydia, should you ever decide to go back to FSSW, just know that Fredericton, N.B. is a pretty little city with plenty of friendly people. 😉

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1 hour ago, SarahAlexxx said:

So, can we all just pitch in and get Lydia to #halifax ?! #lydiaontour

I'm in, as long as we can all hang out while I drool in both of your general directions

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This is amazing Caroline @lydiahardwood!  So much more wonderful sharing than I expected.  You have been such a positive force for Lyla and have very much become the “voice” of this page.  Thank you for sharing and for everything you do here.  
And yes I’m definitely a member of your fan club too!  

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12 hours ago, lydiahardwood said:

Hey guys! I asked you guys who you’d like to see interviewed and I was so honoured to be suggested as an interviewee. So, this one is a little different to others. I must admit I feel like a mad woman talking to herself, haha! I’ve included the questions asked by @Sharpe, @SarahAlexxx@StephanieMystique and @roamingguy but also added a few of my own. If you have any further questions please feel free to comment on here and I’ll get back to you. ❤️ 

Q: Lydia Hardwood, who even ARE you?!
A: First up I should probably admit that’s not my real name. I’m actually called Caroline! Lydia Hardwood was a name I came up with when signing up to Lyla. Lydia is kinda like Lyla, Hardwood is… well, I wanted something subtly raunchy and that’s the best I could come up with lol. I’m 26 and originally from London in the UK. I’ve worked in social media and community management for a few years and have worked with Lyla since February 2020. So far it’s been the best job I’ve ever had, mostly thanks to you guys.

Q: Did you work within the adult industry before?
A: A little, yes! When I was 18 I met a fantastic lady who was a professional Domme. I learnt a lot from her and started helping with her advertising. This is where my love and respect for the community started. I also do some modelling and a lot of the photographers and models I work with are within the adult niche, so I’ve been fairly well acquainted with it. 

Q: Have you ever considered buying/selling services?
A: Absolutely! I’ve not done FSSW but I’ve dabbled in other areas. As for purchasing, I’ve not done that yet but it’s something I would definitely consider if the opportunity arose. Especially looking at the Providers in Canada, phewwwwwww!

Q: What’s your favourite part of Lyla?
A: The members here are feminists, respectful and all round incredible people. I can’t tell you how refreshing that is compared to the toxic culture that’s all too prevalent on other sex work boards and forums. My morals and values are incredibly important to me and I wouldn’t support or work for a brand that wasn’t aligned with them. So to find Lyla and see first hand how positive it is for the community is just amazing. Feminism and supporting sex workers has been a cause close to my heart for a very long time but I never knew I’d be fortunate enough to have a job like this.

Q: What are your core values and why?
I’m a firm believer in live and let live. I’m not a judgemental person; if no one is being harmed or disrespected then you do you! I’m also a big believer in being open, listening to others and learning from their experiences to address your own unconscious biases. Unfortunately I do come across a lot of SWERFS who strongly believe that sex work is supporting the patriarchy, but I think the only way to truly overcome this is by having open discussion about it and raising points that they may not have thought of. 

I think a lot of these strong values come from how I was brought up - I was raised in a very strict cult that was homophobic, sexist and bigoted to say the least. From a young age what they taught just didn’t sit right with me and I was forever getting myself in trouble by calling it out, haha. I don’t think they were prepared for a fiery, bisexual, 14 year old feminist. They very much taught that you shouldn’t rely on your own gut feeling, just read the Bible, don’t have pre-marital sex, don’t be aware of your own sexuality, don’t answer back if you’re a woman, don’t question the rules. And I was like “nah, if this is what your god wants then I don’t wanna dedicate my life to serving him”. One thing that has always stuck with me too is their demonisation of sex workers. In their publications they talk about “the Whore of Babylon'' and I remember all of these beautiful illustrations of her drinking wine sitting on the back of a big cat with multiple heads. I think it had the opposite effect of what they intended cos I remember being like “she looks badass, I wanna be like her when I grow up”. I’m actually getting a tattoo of her in a couple months time, lol. Sorry, Mom.

VZA-4srVNwJFYdF-pt9bKtN2v8-7H_j-FaY_G-Seq2aTLRMelZbQcPYa7Xqw1AeJ2P48EnMxGG-sDPixUDqedtkgqLFeOhcSMnnSoqO0lWOMEUyn97223gOWTDPlsfRl8gpHuC-v

Q: How does being part of the community better your life?
A: It’s educated me. Big time. As I said before, if you wanna help a community the first thing you should do is listen to them. That’s why I started these interviews; if I’m going to be working for you guys I need to know what is important to you and what we can do to improve and break stigma in the industry. So thank you for that, especially @Daysha Love , @SarahAlexxx, @Kitten, @kyliekarma, @Berlin Moss, @StephanieMystique and @roamingguy for your insight so far.

Q: What do you think is the toughest part of your job?
A: Seeing people get disrespected/outed/hurt and not being able to do much about it. @StephanieMystique went through it recently and spoke about it in her interview. She was so brave and strong throughout it all, why anyone would want to do that to someone is beyond me. At least if someone makes a misogynistic comment you can tell them to get lost, but attacking someone personally in that way? Unforgivable.

Q: If you could change one thing about sex work, what would it be?
A: Decriminalise it everywhere, for workers and clients. Give sex workers more opportunities to speak on topics that are important to them. I think these two things would make a tremendous difference in reducing stigma and making the industry safer for everyone.

Q: What is your biggest goal/ambition for Lyla?
A: We want to be the number one sex work board in Canada. That’s the first goal. But if we’re dreaming big… I’d love to see Lyla go international. What’s stopping us from being the biggest sex work community in the world? For me it’s not just to do with traffic or engagement. Imagine if our community’s voices are amplified so much that we literally change laws and make life better for sex workers everywhere? I remember going to a seminar by a photographer called Robin Hammond from National Geographic where he did a campaign called #whereloveisillegal. He photographed different LGBTQ+ people from around the world where homosexuality is illegal and it got such a good response that some men in Nigeria were released from prison. I may be dreaming big, but that’s the kind of change I want to be part of, and I think with the right attitude and hard work it’s absolutely achievable.

Q: What was the change and motivation to bring Lyla back to life?
A: As many of you know it was sold over a year ago, which is when it went a bit dead. But now that we have a team in place we are pouring in time and effort to make it even bigger and better than before! We even have a developer working behind the scenes to improve the UX of the site, so expect some positive changes.

Q: Have you ever admined/modded a board before?
A: Nope! This is the first. My background is in social media, mainly paid Facebook advertising and content creation. This was very new to me, I’ve not even been active on a board before. It’s been a big learning curve.

Q: Why did you keep the Lyla mantra of “if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all”? Was there pressure to change it?
A: Not at all. Luckily the whole team is very supportive of the community - none of us have time for toxic review board culture, in fact we actively oppose it. Our mantra is what separates us from the rest - I can guarantee that will never change.

That’s it from me, I hope you enjoyed learning a little more about me. As always, if you need anything from me/have any questions my inbox is always open. Big love!

caroline.thumb.jpeg.ca1967a4f23e62e82deaaab7480a15f3.jpeg

Good Lord you’re gorgeous!

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Your interview i enjoyed incredibly!

It not only reminded me of my teenage angst, but also why I left my last muggle job at the begining of this year. 

You have heard it many times now but will reitterate you are an absolute beauty and such a gem 💋

If ever you would like to come see Canada, I would be honoured to host and help you explore our nations capital!

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Guest lydiahardwood
7 minutes ago, Kitten said:

 

If ever you would like to come see Canada, I would be honoured to host and help you explore our nations capital!

 

16 hours ago, SarahAlexxx said:

So, can we all just pitch in and get Lydia to #halifax ?! #lydiaontour

I feel a Lyla meet up coming on... 👀

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1 hour ago, lydiahardwood said:

 

I feel a Lyla meet up coming on... 👀

Girl, you have so many people who want to meet you! Start in the East Coast and tour your way around. Spend the day in the life of a SW! I'd also be more than happy to host you. ♡

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Great interview! 

But I wonder how you became to run be a mod on here? Did you register on Lyla to lurk/potentially do sex work or created an account because you got hired by the owner of the board to run it now? (which is slowly coming a bit back woohoo!)

 

And you are incredibly gorgeous

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