buggernot 588 Report post Posted March 5, 2009 My biggest concern would be whether or not they could handle it. Even the most open minded people can get bent out of shape in the heat of the moment. But if it's true love, you can't ask for anything more than that and I would support it 100%. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted March 5, 2009 Simply nothing. As far as I am concerned SP/MP is a line of work and you don't judge people by what they do. What is inportant is who they are. I agree. It's up to them to decide with whom they want to be. I'm assming they know they are dating an SP/MA, BTW. Women in this line of work can be just as good - or bad - as any other to have a long-term intimate relationship with. Same as if I knew a daughter or female friend was dating one of the male members of CERB. Again, I'm assuming they know this fact, BTW. Up to them to decide whether or not they want to date some guy who spends a lot of time screwing around with a bunch of SPs or MAs. Us guys can be just as good - or bad - as any other as long-term companions in intimate relationships. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seymour 3970 Report post Posted March 5, 2009 I have a bit of an unusual history in my life and by the second or third date I lay it all on the table, that way my potential SO can make a decision about proceeding or not. In my current relationship I am feeling extremely guilty because I thought that this was all behind me when we agreed to marry and I have not been able to walk away, from either the life or the marriage. My current wife knows all about my past experiences however she also believes that I have turned a new leaf with her, it is the first time in my life that I have been dishonest and it is killing me. Our fabric is what makes us who we are, I would not be were I am in life or the person I am if I had not followed the path I have, it's what makes us interesting. Everyone has some skeletons in the closet. Dummpy, I believe the only unusual part is the fact you were upfront with your past. For anyone who eventually meets someone outside this industry, I believe in most cases this chapter of one's past will be like opening a Pandora's box. Chances are very few of us can do that. I'm not even sure if I can do it. We all have skeletons in our closet and would rather keep them there. If we didn't we would likely not be using aliases on an 'anonymous' escort recommendation board. Great insight Dummpy and great questions Ava. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted March 5, 2009 If she was retired absolutely nothing. But I believe that if it was a serious relationship with an active sp I would tell, because, I believe serious relationships should be monagamous.But once I told him if he wanted to stay with her, it be okay with me.:?: Just because you believe serious relationships should be monogamous doesn't mean everyone else also subscribes to this view. Maybe this SP/MP already discussed their line of work with said brother, son, friend, etc. Personally, I'm not one to nose into anyone else's business. Who they choose to date/fuck/love is their own perogative. If I was truly a friend, I'd just be happy that they were happy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted March 5, 2009 i have dated two sp's. One of them I found it very difficult to have her still working as I had proposed marriage to her. I wanted her just for me and was head over heals in love with Barbie.Could not handle she was with other guys. The other a cute Jamacian petite girl I was able to handle, but I loved her in more of a friendship way and was willing to accept her for what she does. I believe it is in the depth of love you have for the person, on whether you can handle it or not. Just imagine if you were in love deeply with a client could you handle him sleeping with other women?:shock::? I think that it comes down to how insecure are you as a person? If you love someone, and you trust them and you know what they do for a living, then you should trust that they keep their work, as just work, and their love, only for you. If you ask yourself deep down, why it bothers you, it usually comes down to "I'm afraid she's going to leave me for some other guy who potentially is a better lover than me." Which is insecurity. Sex is a basic human right, regardless of how you feel about it. People crave sex, they want it, they desire it, or this profession wouldn't exist. Women who choose this profession should not be denied a partner in life because said partner can't handle her fucking other guys. It is a job. That's it. End of story. One of my current lovers occasionally sees a pro (you know, when the orgasmic awesomeness that is me is unavailable, bwahahaha). I have absolutely no problem with it. In fact, I was pissed last time because the Asian girl he called for, wasn't the Asian who showed up at his door, and he didn't want to make trouble or cause a scene. And I was all, you can't let them get away with that bait and switch shit. Haha. Put your foot down and fight for the Asian you called for! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
capitalman 3861 Report post Posted March 6, 2009 Being the pervert I am, I would have to ask my brother/friend/cousin if I can try the girl out for a ride or two! :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RubJunky 1954 Report post Posted March 6, 2009 Well, if it was my brother it wouldn't shock me, he's dated everything from Bank managers to strippers....... Bastard! But seriously, if they are both open and comfortable with their partners current or past job and they're happy, then what the hell, let it be.... On the other hand, if the girl he was dating was still active and she is one of my SP's.... I would tell him the day he shows me her picture. rub Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caveman 147 Report post Posted March 7, 2009 Well, if it was my brother it wouldn't shock me, he's dated everything from Bank managers to strippers....... Bastard! I think it's hilarious that "Bank Manager" and "Stripper" are the two ends of the dating spectrum... :lol: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted March 7, 2009 I think it's hilarious that "Bank Manager" and "Stripper" are the two ends of the dating spectrum... :lol: Yep, too funny. We have to move those goalposts further. Life in general has quite a broad spectrum. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Alwa***Up Report post Posted March 8, 2009 If it was my son, I would be tempted to talk directly to the SP/MP and make sure she was aware of the damage that was possible if gossip started to spread. Ultimatlely it is their private business, but I would want to know the SP/MP truly had my sons interests at heart. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
o*****j***e 136 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 I would be proud! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spaceykca 198 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 hmmmm...could be a little weird if say, the person your brother/father/son/friend is in a relationship with someone that you have been with lol... and knowing me i would probably be most awkward for awhile lol... kidding aside...If they are in a happy/committed/loving relationship and it is serious, i think then he would probably know of her past or current occupation.... In order to be in that type of loving/happy/committed relationship, you tend to accept the person whatever the case. Just like when your falling in love and you have the talk, where you talk all night long or all day, and things just click in... Then again what do i know... I say this yet keep what i do secret, and i am in a loving committed relationship lol.... although in my defense, what i do began after the fact lol Really i guess its no ones business but theirs...If she is a retired mp or sp, it probably doesnt matter, but you normally bare yourself when the relationship gets going, as you need/want to know if you will truly be loved. If she is still working, well, if it was me, I would want to know if the person im going out with, and getting pretty serious with is in this industry. If she made me happy and loved me and was a committed thing, well, it wouldnt matter... may take a little bit to get used to lol but i think trust and honesty is key (again so says the secretive one lol) To each their own i guess... I probably wouldnt get involved or say anything, unless she was up to no good and you can see your loved one getting hurt in a big way(but that goes with anything, not just to this question)... and i would probably stop seeing her as a client if she was one that i have seen lol... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 So it's ok for you to see an SP and not your son? Sorry, but that is very hypocritical. As I said, if my son was to fall in love with an SP or MP I would be happy for him and very supportive. If it was my son, I would be tempted to talk directly to the SP/MP and make sure she was aware of the damage that was possible if gossip started to spread. Ultimatlely it is their private business, but I would want to know the SP/MP truly had my sons interests at heart. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 So it's ok for you to see an SP and not your son? Sorry, but that is very hypocritical. As I said, if my son was to fall in love with an SP or MP I would be happy for him and very supportive. Sounded like he just wanted to make sure that there was good intentions all around - old fashioned parental concern. Some people get involved with their children's business more than others (helicopter parents). And not to paint all the sp's with the same brush, but there's a few out there that are manipulative and/or money hungry, perhaps even emotionally damaged from life events leading up to their choice to work as an escort, or maybe even from doing it. I wonder what the % of shift in the responses would be like if this wasn't about sons or brothers dating sp's, but sisters and daughters becoming one? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 Now that is an interesting question!!! You should start a thread about that, would be curious to see the responses on that question!!! I wonder what the % of shift in the responses would be like if this wasn't about sons or brothers dating sp's, but sisters and daughters becoming one? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seymour 3970 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 And not to paint all the sp's with the same brush, but there's a few out there that are manipulative and/or money hungry, perhaps even emotionally damaged from life events leading up to their choice to work as an escort, or maybe even from doing it. I think on some level we are all emotionally damaged, and I understand the point you are making. Not to distract from the thread, there are money hungry, manipulative people in all walks of life, not just the SP world. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seymour 3970 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 Now that is an interesting question!!! You should start a thread about that, would be curious to see the responses on that question!!! Good point Spud - I think we did, or at least the attempt was there... http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=7268 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VelvetCyclone 101 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 If it were my brother or a friend and I was aware of the situation, I certainly would talk to him about the situation just to see if they would be able to handle the jealousy issues involved. It does take a special kind of person to allow other men to have this kind of intimacy with their SO. However, if it were my son, I wouldn't allow it. I would have to inform him that this is immoral, indecent and I wouldn't stand for it. Mostly because he is 12. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted March 8, 2009 I think on some level we are all emotionally damaged, and I understand the point you are making. Not to distract from the thread, there are money hungry, manipulative people in all walks of life, not just the SP world. For sure, no doubt about that - I'm a basket case myself. But unfortunately, there are many girls drawn into this profession for either the wrong reasons, or out of desperation. Bottom line, doesn't matter who it is or what they do, you still have to dig and soul search to determine whether or not they are trustworthy. There are girls out there that just want your money, and guys out there that just want sex. As a friend or family member, you're going to hope that there's an equilibrium in that person's relationship where there's trust, understanding and disclosure. But I suppose that doesn't really matter if it involves a SP or not! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest gagagaga Report post Posted March 9, 2009 tough question... firstly, If it was an sp that I had been with, I would worry about my SO finding out. selfish, I know. I would wonder if my son knew that I had been there before...weird thought. there is definately some potential awkwardness there. In general, however I would have no problem with a son of mine dating an sp. If it was my daughter and a male sp, I'd have to kill a bit. I don't care if its hypocritical..you don't f$$k with the 300 pound gorilla. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sydsrandy 100 Report post Posted March 9, 2009 Not to stray off this thread too much, but I have a question for the SP's. The phrase 'it is just a job-like any other' comes up quite a bit. Can you say you never have feelings for any of your regulars? Not even a little? I am not saying it happens for each of you regulars but from your experience, or from other Sp's you have talked to, what % would you say you have not fallen or felt something besides just a customer? Basically what i am getting at re: the original question is if I were to date a Sp, I would be jealous of my Gf..not to mention a little P.O's I have to leave 15 minutes after the phone rings. Are Sp's truley detached from 'the (physical) act' and what does that say about the Sp/Regular relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest i***k*** Report post Posted March 10, 2009 I personally would not care, at least I know he'd be getting a good fucking! :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YoungStud 468 Report post Posted March 11, 2009 I would say that in my experience (I would guess more than one thousand different paid sex partners in more than 25 years - I started fairly young - lol), 95 per cent of SPs are pretty much disconnected from any meaningful emotional contact with the client. We're paying them for casual fun sex, after all, not their real emotions. The whole GFE phenomenon, which has only been around for a few years, has probably only added to the confusion. GFE, in my opinion, describes a range of services and an attitude, not an actually relationship. You can fantasize that she's in love with you, really likes you, etc. But she's just being nice to you in a professional way. Nothing wrong with that. You're paying for it. And she's happy to deliver, because it makes her workday more pleasant than dealing with assholes. So enjoy. But don't think it's more than what it is. Sure, if you're a regular or repeat, you can be liked as such in a friendly way, just as a woman who has worked with you at the office for the past few years can have a regular pleasant chat with you in the lunch room. But it's just a pleasant chat in the lunch room and 1 p.m. comes soon enough. But a more extensive connection than that, as in the rest of life, doesn't happen that often. It can happen, but usually, in my experience, requires as much chemistry, work and commitment as any other relationship in which there is a genuine and lasting human connection. An hour's paid sex once or twice a month usually isn't enough to sustain that. Just my two cents worth, of course. Be glad to hear what the SPs think. Not to stray off this thread too much, but I have a question for the SP's. The phrase 'it is just a job-like any other' comes up quite a bit. Can you say you never have feelings for any of your regulars? Not even a little? I am not saying it happens for each of you regulars but from your experience, or from other Sp's you have talked to, what % would you say you have not fallen or felt something besides just a customer?Basically what i am getting at re: the original question is if I were to date a Sp, I would be jealous of my Gf..not to mention a little P.O's I have to leave 15 minutes after the phone rings. Are Sp's truley detached from 'the (physical) act' and what does that say about the Sp/Regular relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
click 110 Report post Posted March 15, 2009 If my brother (etc) was in a loving relationship with an SP and they were open about each other's respective occupations ... more power to them. The important thing is that they are honest with each other. If he was not aware of her occupation ... that is another story, but that would also be the case if she was hiding the fact that she was a doctor, accountant, furrier or tobacco lobbyist. The deception would be the source of my concerns, and not the occupation. OK, that is not completely true. I don't think that I could be supportive of a relationship involving either the furrier or the lobbyist - at least until they repented and found different careers. For what it is worth, the question in this thread has actually bugged me for quite a while. I took the question to heart, and was a little disappointed in myself when I realised that I probably wouldn't offer unconditional support to my brother ... at least if his partner was OK with doing harm to others. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
etasman2000 15994 Report post Posted March 15, 2009 Are Sp's truley detached from 'the (physical) act' and what does that say about the Sp/Regular relationship. These are the two I found relatively quickly. I'm sure there are others. http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=6329 http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=28164#post28164 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
