How Long did it take you to ?

[someguy 67067]

I was wondering how many encounters it took for you to get comfortable in meeting a new SP or MA. It's nerve racking for me to meet someone new each time. In the beginning, I was not sure what to expect. And then spend time with a beautiful naked woman and then having to get naked yourself and try to relax and enjoy yourself is hard to do. I tend tend to repeat with same women because of this fact. I think it wasn't till my 6th encounter that I knew what to e xpect and could enjoy my self without the shyness. Now after years, I still get excited when the door opens to reveal my next date :). Now I am more confident. What was your experiences like ?

[NotchJohnson 214069]

I still get nervous every time I meet a lady, even if its a repeat. I don't know why I'm not a shy person but the fact that I'm going to meet someone and we will remove our clothes and present ourselves to one another is always been nerve wrecking for me. But I love doing it, and you can't stop me.

[roamingguy 300291]

Every encounter I have had, I'm nervous, excited, weak in the knees LOL, the pre date jitters if you will, well you get the idea. Right up to watching the clock and waiting for the knock on the door. Don't know if I'd say nerve racking though, if it was that I'd probably never go through with an encounter. Whether it's with a lady I've never met or a lady I've seen before. And really, for me at least, if not nervous, excited and weak in the knees, well isn't that all part of the experience and fun of meeting ladies, whether a lady you've never met before, or seeing one who is a regular and friend

I'm comfortable now in that I have a routine if you will in preparing for a date.

Get the wine chilled, text the lady with the room number etc etc etc. But the pre-date jitters, still get them

Don't know if that is an answer but that is what I got

RG

[Kubrickfan 12836]

It is difficult, especially if you are on the shy side; there really no two ways about it. The nice thing is that very social places like cerb give you a chance to get to know the lady a bit before you actually get together, and those communications can serve as an icebreaker when you meet.

 

That said, first meetings are always going to be a bit uncomfortable. Your best bet is to sincerely give the proper non-verbal cues (be polite, deferential, clean, friendly and look the lady in the eye). This should always end well, and if it doesn't, maybe there's something else going on.

 

Second, third, etc. meetings can be very different, especially if the first meeting went great. One of my favorite recollections, from a couple of years ago, is with a lady who is very well respected on cerb but who doesn't post a lot. We had seen each other on two previous occasions. It was mid fall, so she was wearing a medium length coat. Well, she came into my room, in a bit of a rush. She quickly handed me her coat, and she had on a proper, but short black skirt and a white blouse, high heels and stockings but that was it (smile). Still standing, she gave me a big hug and kiss, pulled one leg up, announced "Right Now!" and, well, there you have it. Afterwards, we caught up with each other's lives with a great conversation and then has a more relaxed session.

 

Lesson? There is no substitute for familiarity in these things .. its just too personal of an activity. But its worth the investment.

[Guest paq****5]

I get nervous at every encounter either SP or MA.

 

It takes me courage just to pm! It takes me a lot more to contact personnaly and it is nerve racking for me to do so. Once a liaison is booked I have a hard time to sleep and I just imagine and fantasize.

At time of the date I get very nervous, my heart beats rapidly and the shyness kicks in. Sometimes I get second thoughts not to pursue but it seems that I cannot for respect. My evil or angel side tells me to go!!! HE!HE,

 

I believe the beautiful woman of Cerb I have met so far, reads us like a text book and they all can manage to make me comfortable with their beautiful curves and their sexy way of greeting.

Once inside, I try to relax and go with the flow. I have repeated and I am getting a little more comfy but the process always repeats itself!

 

What counts is that I am very happy at the end of the encounter. I sometime wish it never ends but all things must.

[The General 11309]

Someguy, that is an interesting question. For me, the hardest part is to commit and book an appointment. I get nervous about doing this, which I am not sure really why, some anxiousness of the encounter, I think some general guilt too, although this is more of socialty guilt more than anything.

 

Once I book, which is almost always immediate, I tend to be busy getting ready and don't have time to think about it. I worry a bit about me in the encounter, not nervous about meeting the lady, but nervous about whether I will perform to my own expectations.

 

I am generally shy, but there isn't usually a need to have a ton of chit chat, but enough casual chat to get to greet and know a bit about the lady. Maybe since I tend to see different ladies, this part isn't so tough.

 

Anyway, not sure if it really changed much for me after the first encounter. I feel I have had good experiences, which maybe helps my own confidence that the ladies feel I am kind, generous and respectful.

[Athos 108589]

I still get nervous and excited. The night before I usually have trouble sleeping, and the day of I'm distracted and unfocused: counting down the moments until the encounter. Afterwards I spend the rest of the day in blissful ignorance of everything around me and a silly grin on my face!

 

Porthos

[billybob 20128]

Probably 3 or 4 before I stopped physically shaking, I still get nervous but it's a good nervous now.

[Guest Ou**or**n]

My first time was a bit nerve wracking but it ended up going well. After that I really just didn't get nervous. I get along very easily with people in person. I also almost always book and hour so there is time to get to know one another before the clothes start coming off. Sometimes I'll sit in a hotel lobby and marvel at the fact that within a short period of time I'll be meeting someone for the very first time ever and that within 20 to 30 minutes we'll be involved on an intimate level.

 

The phone however is a different story. I'm always nervous if I have to call. I'm alright if its just a quick get a room number call but I'm no good at all at calling up a lady to get initial information and booking an appointment. I'm generally OK now with agencies but I'm still a little nervous.

[Guest S****r]

This is a revelation to me. I had no idea this was so nerve wracking for you guys! Thanks for sharing that.

[Guest *ig*a**]

I also get nervous whether it's the first time I meet a lady or if it's a repeat I think it's the adrenaline the excitment of what's to come.

[backrubman 64800]

This is a revelation to me. I had no idea this was so nerve wracking for you guys! Thanks for sharing that.

 

I've never really had any problem with this but rather look forward to a relaxing time. But I've read on other threads (like those that describe first experiences, and there are a few of them) were one compared it to skydiving for the first time and another mentioned becoming violently ill in the moments before her arrival. Based on this I'd have to say that at least some no-shows have no-choice because they have failed to anticipate the effect this will have on them.

 

I find the ladies are really wonderful about being friendly and not intimidating.

 

I do always book lots of extra time so I know I'm just meeting someone and there will be some social time to start.

 

One wonderful lady walked into my hotel suite, put the envelope in her purse and then removed and threw every piece of clothing she was wearing over in the corner and did this so quickly I didn't even see her do it (or know, guess I was distracted for 20 or 30 seconds) so when I turned around I was a little shocked to see such a beautiful totally nude woman so suddenly with a big (I did it when you weren't looking grin on her face) but I got over it quickly. Very definitely a change of pace for me but I will repeat :)

[contraman 5480]

I think it's definitely a nerves inducing experience.

 

The first time, it's always more nervous because hey -- you don't know this person, and you're about to have sex with them. What if there's something about them physically that is a buzz kill; what if their personality doesn't do it for you; what if there's something weird around the setting?

 

Also probably depends on incall / outcall. A number of years ago, I tried a date with someone in Ottawa's south end. As agreed, called on arriving at the building. No answer. Called again. Here I am, don't know who I'm meeting, just have a number, no answer, it's cold, windy, wet, I'm trying to figure out what's going on. About 20 minutes later, I get a call saying they were held up with something. By that time I was so rattled that I just passed on the opportunity. That was it for months / years for me.

 

The first time I did this, I went to another high-rise apartment, walk into the apartment, and there's a guy and another girl sitting playing video games in the living room while I'm being escorted into the bedroom.

 

I guess I've been weirded out enough by that sort of thing that I tend to be quite nervous and watchful the first time, looking for things that seem off.

 

Seems to me that if you're lucky enough to find a good person to be with, then the nervousness becomes one more of pre-performance anxiety. I have performed on stage, and it's a similar feeling to pre-show jitters. Excitement, a touch of nerves, knowing that something really good can happen, wanting it to work the way you hope...

[mrgreen760 37785]

Butterflies in my stomach more than nerves for me. When I make presentations or do any media or see a SP I'm "better" when I have butterflies......it means I'm intersted, enagaged and It matters to me.

 

Peace

MG

[Rounding Third 9567]

Hey Someguy. I think this is a great question and I really appreciate everyone's responses and perhaps happy I am not much different from many of you guys.

 

As for me there is always some degree of nervousness, no matter how many times I see a lady. First encounters are usually the worst. There is one famous first encounter that occurred nearly three years ago with a lady I am still fortunate to see. I was so ridiculously nervous that evening, we still laugh at it. Perhaps that experience was good for me in the long run as I think I have been better dealing with nervousness since.

 

Another thing about me is that conversation helps with nervousness. I am not a normally talkative guy, however, I find myself more talkative with the ladies I meet.

 

Another thing I have learned about myself is not to script things in my mind, or develop preconceptions about how an encounter is to go. It never works out the way you think, better to let the encounter unfold in its own wonderful, delightful, magical way!!!

 

Nervousness, anticipation, excitement are all part of the experience. Perhaps they intersect with each other and it is hard to distinguished one for the other.

 

Gosh! This business is fun isn't it!!!!!!!!!

[roamingguy 300291]

This is a revelation to me. I had no idea this was so nerve wracking for you guys! Thanks for sharing that.

 

Well not nerve wracking (for me), but nervous, excited, butterflies in my stomach, weak in the knees LOL (to me nerve wracking implies what is termed fight/flight syndrome, having nausea etc...that hasn't happened to me) I get excited, but never think of cancelling (flight) an encounter because of it. But if a lady can't get me feeling that way, well for me, there isn't any point in meeting her.

RG

[sweeyguy 140]

i like to send a few emails and get to know their likes and dislikes and clothing options before i see them

i think it makes both parties feel at ease

[Luckyme 41401]

I still have butterflies in my stomach even seeing my regulars for the 4th or 5th time. Although it does get slightly better with the number of times.

 

As a nervous person by nature, I sort of expect that I will be nervous for various reasons one of which is like The General says, nervous about whether I will perform to my own expectations. I am so preoccupied that I have a set time for eating something beforehand ( can't perform on an empty stomach!) and doing a set of routine exercise to warm up and getting the blood flowing, lol.

 

One other thing that makes me nervous is if the incall is in a hotel and I have to walk by the counter. The worst time was when I had to talk to the guy at the counter and told him whom I would be visiting and he had to press a button to let me in to the elevator area.

 

Like pothos, I usually also suffer from sleepless night before the big day. Hell, even my golf suffers the day before - just thinking of the encounter! lol.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

No I guess I am in minority again. No, I am not nervous at all. None whatsoever. That said I was very nervous the first year when I started as I was unaware of the law. I thought that seeing escorts are not legal (prostitution is legal in Canada and so is seeing on-line escorts in private). Yeah as mod has said it before, I was watching too many American movies then. I remember seeing in American movies, incoming escorts (uncover cops) wired, or undercover advertising,....etc. Yeah I guess in the US all their crime related problems are resolved and now they can direct their resources to those adults engaged in consensual sex :(.

 

PS - I learned about escort laws in Canada after joining cerb in 2008. So kudos to cerb :).

[Luckyme 41401]

No I guess I am in minority again. Not I am not nervous at all. None whatsoever. That said I was very nervous the first year when I started as I was unaware of the law. I thought that seeing escorts are not legal. yeah as mod said I was watching too many American movies. Remember seeing in American mvies, incoming escorts (uncover cops) wired, or advertising,....etc.

 

 

Hah.. it seems you have the nerves of steel! I am glad you have such rare talent, my friend! lol.

[Capital Hunter 18263]

Hah.. it seems you have the nerves of steel! I am glad you have such rare talent, my friend! lol.

 

 

Thanks Luckyme. I find it is a lot easier to socialize and converse with the opposite sex these days. A long history of interacting dating back to mid 90's in Montreal dance bars (when as a young fellow I was nervous as hell to even ask for dance. Almost shaking), and later for almost ten years here in Ottawa in strip bars making hundreds of female friends (not sexual), I am not nervous with opposite sex anymore as the barriers are broken. Ladies are no mystery to me anymore to be scared of or be nervous about. Generally speaking, they are too beings with hearts (most often bigger) and minds (most often smarter) who like men wish to be treated with kindness, love and respect.

[Mikeyboy 27105]

Well, I'm glad to hear that I am not the only one who gets nervous before a meeting, although I wouldn't change it for myself. Heart pounding, palms sweating... it makes the experience that much more intense, when I finally overcome my irrational fears and force myself to relax and enjoy. The adrenalin rush is part of the appeal to me. If I ever reach a point when this becomes mundane or common place, I'll likely leave the hobby.

[someguy 67067]

Just wanted to see if any of the Newbies had stories to tell :)

[Eric Northman 16522]

I doubt I'll ever completely lose the jitters. I'm sure part of it is excitement and anticipation. Typically I find the waiting in the lobby (if it's at a hotel) the worst...sitting there, trying to distract myself by playing Angry Birds or something, waiting for a text or call to come up. I find I get cold hands. It makes me a little self conscious because I know I'm going to be touching someone soon so I don't want to give them shivers.

 

Knocking on the door and walking in is definitely the peak of the nerves. They usually decline after that, especially if the lady is really warm and inviting. I'm definitely a bit awkward at first but I usually loosen up quickly and hopefully revert to my charming and silly self. Or dorky. Depends on who you ask. :-D

[someguy 67067]

I've met many more women since I started this thread and have had many repeats with several of the women. When I meet ladies that I have had previous encounters with, I go in with confidence as I know what to expect and I repeat because I have some chemistry.

With a new lady, I get jittery, and nervous because until the door open's you are not sure what to expect. All I have to go by are recommendations and pictures that may or not may show their faces. Sometimes the lady looks much better then their photo's, sometimes not as these photo's may not be recent.

But after the first hug and kiss and a few words, things get more relax and you can let the session play out. However most of the time I've chatted with the woman in chat for a while before I meet them, so I already feel like I know them when I meet. These encounters usually turn out great, as we already seem comfortable with each other from all our conversations.

 

However the nervousness and jitters is part of the excitement of this hobby.

Life is full of surprises, and Life can be good. :)