Would you reveal your private info?

[Maddie 100]

Well hello all,

 

First, I'd like to briefly introduce myself. I'm an ex-indy who's led a bit of a life outside of this world and I'm considering reintegrating it to add a bit of fun/spice to my life. This business has always been a bit of a personal addiction for me. When you're single, it's quite nice to have men complimenting you all the time; the sexual intimacy is great, too, as I'm not really the seeks-one-night-stands-at-the-bar kind of girl. I know this might sound crazy for some, but I've always figured that this line of work was a far more secure way of fulfilling my "needs" than posting some random ad on Craigslist. I also find that I relate much better with men I've met in this business than with other men I've met on dating websites. I think the age gap has something to do with it (I've met mostly older men throughout my experience in this biz, I'm in my mid-30s now), and that age gap also has an impact on sexual maturity (i.e. not seeing my body as some sort of radio with dials that you just turn to produce a porn-movie type effect).

 

However, the only way I could take the plunge again, due to my current work situation, is if I can get full disclosure on identity. I know from my previous stints in this business that providing personal info is not exactly the norm. So I wonder how you feel about having to provide proof of your identity. Obviously, email or board handles can't be relied upon. I'd need either a copy of personal ID, a confirmed booking in a hotel under your name that requires a CC, or a phone number (non-cell) that can be traced back to a full name.

 

If I reintegrate the biz, it would be on a very exclusive basis as I don't really have time to engage in it on a more than extremely part-time basis. I'm thinking a couple times a month. It's not about the money with me; it's more about just doing something naughty, in great contradiction with my very studious real life.

 

I'd love to hear what you have to say about this. I'd especially like to hear the girls' take. I know some of you only meet dates who've fully disclosed their identity. I wonder how you go about getting that info because it's never been my experience that it was easy to get.

 

I'm also aware of websites that "certify" dates, but I am not satisfied with these. I'm not concerned about meeting someone who might be a bad date - my screening methods have never failed me; I'm concerned about meeting someone who might mix with my crowd, work in my area, or be likely to know people in my crowd or work area.

 

I'm just want to make sure our paths would never meet in real life. The problem with this is that I'm not willing to offer the same personal information about myself. So there's a double standard going on.

 

I want to know how you feel about that.

 

I wish I could add a poll to gauge opinion, but haven't figured out how to do that. If a Mod is feeling especially nice, I'd just like the two options: "no, I don't mind disclosing my personal info" or "yes, I mind".

 

Thanks, and happy Sunday all.

 

Maddie

[cinelli 22184]

If you are a well known established lady with a reputation for being discreet, sure, I will share info if I really need to see you.

A new member with two posts? No thanks.

It's a choice between seeing someone I know and trust vs seeing someone I do not know anything about and who wants my info.

[Ice4fun 78396]

With Bill C36 looming over all our heads the need for clients to be extra vigilant in their screening process is going to increase.

 

Similar to yourself I have a career and interests outside if this hobby and as a result I have always needed to be very careful about who I provided my personal information too.

 

Given these two items mentioned above I see the likelihood of my sharing my personal information in the future with an SP I have never met or who I cannot verify as legitimate from my knowledge of the community or confirmation from other SP's who I have met and developed a level of trust to be increasingly remote.

 

Just my opinion.

[roamingguy 300291]

With a lady I want to see I would disclose requested verification information, including name, cell phone, email, board handle confirmed by pm. If I'm interested in meeting a lady trust issues for me are not a issue.

I use certain things to establish if a lady is trustworthy if I haven't heard of her...board presence, recommendations, maybe another well established SP has heard of her and so on.

But someone just starting up, out of the blue, I'm not too likely to reveal anything, mind you I'm not likely to see someone new, that no one knows irrespective of whether she requires verification/screening

 

RG

[Maddie 100]

Hi guys,

 

Thanks a lot for your honest answers. Much appreciated.

 

m.

[jafo105 39057]

No I do not mind disclosing my personal information with a SP or MP. The more open and honest we are with each other the smoother I believe the encounter will be. This is a very important and unique relationship after all. IMHO. :)

[Andee 220524]

If you are a well known established lady with a reputation for being discreet, sure, I will share info if I really need to see you.

A new member with two posts? No thanks.

It's a choice between seeing someone I know and trust vs seeing someone I do not know anything about and who wants my info.

 

Maddie has been around and from what I have heard, has a good reputation. Don't be so quick to judge someone for simply being a new member here.

[loopie 15358]

If your priority is just keeping your two lives seperate, have you considered escorting in another city than where you normally work your day job and live?

[batmeez69 525]

i was about to start a thread with a similar topic, but good thing i came across this one. Generally speaking, is it required for the client to show an sp their ID when meeting them at the door? Also, when booking with agencies such as MGF, VIPOTG, jerseygirls etc, what sort of information must the client provide? can he/she use an alias?

[Guest Cr**gCa***ng]

Deleted my original post as I gave this matter more thought and decided I would rather not have to do so as I never have had to up to this point. I am open and cooperative and adhere to all necessary screening requirements.

[Gentleman11 10508]

As a single guy now, I don't have as much at risk as some might. However, a new SP relationship for me would take a bit of time, some to and fro just to get a sense of the person. I trust my instincts, they have been finely honed over the years.

 

Long story short, no problem in providing enough info for an SP to gleam the same sense of comfort about me, (but I draw the line at sending dick pics as I'm hung like a stud budgy lol).

[Guest P*rry]

Maddie: Welcome back so to speak. Security is important for all of us. Nonetheless, for me as a hobbyist there are limits. One is the unlikelihood that I would provide a copy of personal ID. Good luck.

[fortunateone 156618]

i was about to start a thread with a similar topic, but good thing i came across this one. Generally speaking, is it required for the client to show an sp their ID when meeting them at the door? Also, when booking with agencies such as MGF, VIPOTG, jerseygirls etc, what sort of information must the client provide? can he/she use an alias?

 

 

 

There are massage parlours now where you have to show ID. You might consider it an age verification as well? There are few sps who ask to see the ID or ask for it to be sent to them or a photo to compare to the person showing up.

 

Each sp determines how much info they need to feel secure, and it is up to the client to decide how much info they are willing to provide to feel secure .

 

Very few sps have only one single way to proceed. Someone may say they want photo ID, but their 2nd option for screening is 2 references from established sp, plus a name (not necessarily real name) and phone #.

 

It's pretty rare for any sp to have only one way, and that way being for clients to provide all kinds of personal info.

[roamingguy 300291]

There are massage parlours now where you have to show ID. You might consider it an age verification as well? There are few sps who ask to see the ID or ask for it to be sent to them or a photo to compare to the person showing up.

 

Each sp determines how much info they need to feel secure, and it is up to the client to decide how much info they are willing to provide to feel secure .

 

Very few sps have only one single way to proceed. Someone may say they want photo ID, but their 2nd option for screening is 2 references from established sp, plus a name (not necessarily real name) and phone #.

 

It's pretty rare for any sp to have only one way, and that way being for clients to provide all kinds of personal info.

 

The only time I've had to show ID is at hotels checking in, a credit card and a piece of ID. (I'm an outcall type of guy)

But never to a companion

But there was one time I showed my badge/ID (I used to be in LE) to a lady I was seeing...because she was interested. I showed her my medal too. I guess a new take on the old line "come up and see my etchings" LOL

 

RG

[mrgreen760 37785]

Would you reveal your private info?

 

Nope

 

Peace

MG

[Maddie 100]

Hi,

 

Thanks again for all the feedback. It's pretty clear that if I decide to come back, I'll have to think wisely about my strategy. Your insights were very useful. Right now, I'm leaning toward the "not coming back" option, unfortunately.

 

Just two replies to two people who took the time to comment:

 

Lily: I understand that in your case, you don't want this information, regardless of having "two lives", but your situation may not apply to me :) We all have different lives and I think we are free to make different life decisions.

 

Mr Green: as I pointed out in my original post, I understand the double standard. It is precisely because of that double standard that I felt most people would be opposed to revealing their personal info.

 

That said, I still haven't heard from the gals who *do* impose personal identification on their future dates. I know some of you do this. If it's too sensitive a subject to discuss out in the open, feel free to contact me by PM.

 

Again, thanks a lot to everyone who contributed.

 

Maddie

[cinelli 22184]

I actually cringe when I get request with a company letterhead or have potential date send me links to their real life sites...

 

Funny you should mention that.

 

A local Winnipeg SP recently sent out a mass email, one of those "To All:" ones.

It had a couple of dozen obvious real names and places of employment in the header.

And it's not the first time she has done it!

[Phaedrus 209521]

I'd be OK giving my identity to someone who was well-established in the industry, and who I trusted to destroy any record of it once she no longer required it. But there's absolutely no way I'd send it to a newcomer or to someone without a good track record.

[peacectryguy 12523]

I have no problem giving a lady my full name and email address. I usually do that anyway. Hell, I'll count my pubic hairs and give you an itemized list if it pleases you. (okay, that may be going a little too far). In all seriousness though, I have no problem with some type of verification process if required. I don't hide much and don't much care who knows what. I will echo the sentiment about it being an established provider with some track record. Of course, I really don't go out on a limb with the BP types, etc. anymore so it's a moot point.

[Jasmine Rain 23126]

Client verification is a huge concern for me as well however I don't have a reputation yet either so I felt asking for information that may be considered "too" personal was not the way to go for me.

 

I decided on using Sp references for verification in combination with board handle and verified white list services like P411. I do hope that in time, I may be able to require more information with out reputation concerns should I feel that I need to.

 

However, stating all of that, I think that if you feel you need a certain check list of items before meeting someone, then you should ask for it. Clearly women are able to request this information and are getting it. I can't say for certain if the volume of inquires will change based on the amount of information required and that may be something that you may need to look at before hand and therefore may be able to deflect that possible loss in volume with adjustments to service, rates or location.

 

I think the only way you can really ask for the information is simply ask for it and not accept less then what you feel comfortable it. I think that providing a online information and booking request email form on your site as the only method of contact helps in this manner and seems to be what most of the providers do who are looking for this same type of client verification. This way you are not left in uncomfortable situations in text or on the phone trying to ask for this information.

 

Good luck

[Guest S*rca****sid]

Actually sending pic of male appendice is a sure way to get a no thanks...even more then bad spelling...

Does that include poor grammar?

[bcguy42 38594]

Hi Maddie, you've raised an interesting question. You said you were most interested in responses from other SPs but I'll take the liberty in throwing in my two bit's worth.

 

As noted by the Supreme Court, every person has a right to a safe, secure working environment. In this industry, how one defines that when it comes down to the details is a matter of personal choice.

 

In your case, your choice is full disclosure by the client. You also say you prefer a small number of clients. That's a good match.

 

As some responses have said, some potential clients will not ever provide that. A few have indicated they might. In setting this as a requirement you narrow the pool of potential clients which, in your case, is not necessarily a bad thing.

 

As a returning player, as it were, if an established, trusted SP were to vouch for you (nod to Angela), I personally would have no problem supplying the required information.

 

Even if you were brand new to the game you would most likely know at least one other SP who could attest to your trustworthiness.

 

One last thing... The issue of "I will show you my ID if you will show me your's" is not, IMHO, a fair trade-off. In general, I pose more of a treat to you than vice versus so no, I would not ask for your ID.

[Eva Laperle 7898]

The way I see it, just like us ladies, most gents want to be discreet. That's why we all use handles, everybody's need for some sort of privacy is understandable. Anonymity is central to the business for both escorts and clients. But safety is equally important. I realize some gents are not quite comfortable with the idea of having to share private info while others are happily to disclose their life biographies. If the gent is serious about meeting a lady, he should cooperate or find a way to ease her concerns...

Personally, I'm used to screen my clients by judging their telephone/email etiquette(and I ask them a brief introduction of themselves, and a little description of their ideal date with me is always greatly appreciated).

[Andee 220524]

Maddie has been around and from what I have heard, has a good reputation. Don't be so quick to judge someone for simply being a new member here.

 

Addendum to my previous post:

 

I mistook Maddie for another lady named Maddy. I do not know anything about Maddie's reputation. However, having said that, I do not see anything wrong with her simply asking a question to help her establish what kind of screening she wishes to implement.

 

I have been reading some the posts here, and all I can say is give the lady a break. It takes time for someone to establish herself and build up a reputation and posting history. If some of you don't care to provide certain types of personal information, so be it, but there is no need to be condescending.

 

Oh and not to hijack, but as for posting history on cerb, some of the nicest clients I have met from this board had (have) little or no posts.

[Guest N***he**Ont**y]

I have no problem giving basic information that is required for pre screening. I use a hobby phone for my first visits and give what is requested. Yes my personal friends in the business have more personal information but they are really trust worthy in my opinion and I am fond of them.