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Words of wisdom or humour.

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I have been trying to collect things that I have heard and most recently stuff that has been said on twitter.

I thought it would be a good idea to share some of these.
Although I have some that are either political or religious, I won't share those.

First off, one of the many comedians I follow, Adam Carolla has a few,

"Your first step doesn't always have to be forward" I found this to be very insightful.

"Women cringe when thinking about their sexual past. Men beat off to theirs." This may not be true but I found it funny.

"Stop trying to figure out a way to save a nickel, and start thinking about ways to make a buck" I wish I knew this 30 years ago.

Ricky Gervais.
"I'm not a failure because i didn't succeed, I'm a failure because i didn't try." From the series Derek. Wow.

Norm MacDonald.
"If tampons are called â??sanitary napkins,â? how unsanitary must regular napkins be?" Just funny.

Anyone else have any words of wisdom to share?

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