Guest e**m***h Report post Posted May 22, 2011 So the question is: what makes your lovers wonderful? I have been thinking about this lately and realized my views have changed a lot over time. For me, the lovers I think of as wonderful have each been different in many ways, yet they do have something in common. There has been this tremendous sense of connection. Not just any connection, and not necessarily a deep, serious love thing (I have been deeply in love and yet had surprisingly boring sex)...I mean a connection that is really natural, allowing whatever happens to happen with this really great intensity and freedom. Both really, really want what is happening. This way everything feels like what is being experienced, all the astonishment, sudden increases in passion, joy...all of it is amazingly shared, bigger than just in your own body. I really love that sense. So for me it is connection. Anyway, thought it would be something nice to discuss. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angeltbay 612 Report post Posted May 22, 2011 are you asking this as a SP/hobbiest relationship? or just in general? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest e**m***h Report post Posted May 22, 2011 I was asking inclusively I guess - out of the the people you have sex with. Maybe I shouldn't have used the term 'lovers'...but when I am with a truly great SP it feels like I am with a really gifted lover - someone who is amazing at sex. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest **cely***r***ne Report post Posted May 22, 2011 When I share myself with someone...it is truley unguarded. All is exposed. In my opinion, when two people are having sex, it is naturally an animal sense that takes over. For me, this is what makes being with a "lover" wonderful... when and if any insecurities are not present. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nathalie L 112512 Report post Posted May 27, 2011 Nice thread idea, Voyi. Here is my two cents: An amazing lover is someone who creates a safe space for me to explore my needs and desires. Like you, there needs to be a particular connection. It can be a spiritual, intellectual, and/or sporty connection (etc.). I also need my lovers to languidly explore my body. Not delicately (because pressure is good), but just in a slow and relaxed way. Sex should be an exploration. It's carnal, but there's also a lot of opportunities for growth through sex, if one is open to that possibility in that moment. Gender bending is always nice too. Sometime I'm actively submissive, sometimes, I'm more dominant... never passive. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winnipegcub 21293 Report post Posted May 28, 2011 This hobby has exposed me to some great ladies and opened me up. As others have said the connection is critical. An old line exists that says; "I really like you". I think for me that is part of it. If I really like the person I'm with which is often based on respect and admiration, then I know I can relax, feel at peace, open up, and want to be made love to. Likewise, if I'm into who the woman is - then I truly want to bring her pleasure. Finding and being with great lovers is SO AMAZING. I'm just sorry it took me this long to find them. But going forward I cherish the opportunities. Big cub hugs to all the lovers on CERB. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CalgaryGuy 100 Report post Posted May 28, 2011 Great sex is having a passion for sex. If its just hormonal then that's the one night stand. To be great you have to have the patience to explore. I get lots of satisfaction and thrill from watching her reaction from me. That is when she is fully exposed and willing to let me take the pilots seat. I don't limit my time on areas or do anything just because I should. I will touch, lick and suck every part of her because I want to. She knows I want to and will relax to anything. It helps my pleasure too knowing I'm doing everything I am because I am consumed by her. That makes great sex. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cato 160314 Report post Posted May 28, 2011 Nice thread. Good ideas: connection, exploration, growth, wanting the other's pleasure... It's living the experience fully, not being distracted with other thoughts, getting into the rhythm of it, or the rhythms, from intense and carried-away to slow and sensuous. All the senses engaged, and your partner is, at that moment, your whole world. 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cato 160314 Report post Posted May 29, 2011 Sort of like this: ecstatic, enthusiastic, fun, animalistic sex. http://www.4tube.com/videos/120301/kagney-karter-hot-babe-let-a-bone-on-cock-send-inside I'd love my women to come like this!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hockey 683 Report post Posted May 30, 2011 Great thread and posts! Certainly agree with all comments made previously. To me, wonderfull lovers and great sex is between two people who have a true connection with each other whether just for one night or on a long term basis. It's the time spent showing each other private feelings and desires. You go to a place with each other, and the world around doesn't exist for that time together. Each one is honest with the other as to their likes and dislikes. It doesn't matter how, or which way, you have sex. It is about touching, feeling and experimenting - enjoying something new. One can't really express what a wonderful lover is until they actually experience that wonderful lover. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kubrickfan 12836 Report post Posted May 30, 2011 Late to this thread, but its a great topic and lots of great responses. Nathalie's response is wonderful (and not to mention realy sexy ...smile) at the same time. Its wonderful because its the absolute truth ... establishing a level of comfort and familiarity, via a connection of one form or another, that allows each person to be comfortable and sincere in exploring their own sensuality while having a sense of what the other person really is enjoying. The ladies I have enjoyed my time with the most are those that I have made that "connection" with. It could be on whatever topic you share in common as it establishes that this person is someone that shares (or at least understands) my point of view ... therefore they are "familiar" to me and I am comfortable with them. Once that is established, its is much easier to explore some sort of physical connection in a genuine way. That's a lot to ask in an hour so I always try to extend appointments, especially "introductory" appointments, whenever possible. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carrie Moon 68826 Report post Posted June 2, 2011 Some great responses. It's hard for me to articulate what others have already said so well... but I just had a great appt that met all those requirements aforementioned and I have to say when that happens.. it's not work! Time just flies by. He knew how to tease and I anticipated that when he showed up and I saw in his eyes and smile that mischevious personality lurking underneath a bit of nervousness. He didn't disappoint. I've always thought that the reason women are referred to as ''pussy'' is because we're like cats. Cats need to be enticed. A bit of soft but with the right pressure stroking in the right direction yields tons of purring and responsiveness. This in turn turns a man on and the cycle of repetitive increase in pleasure and response builds and builds. Sigh... if all clients were like that I'd never leave my bed. So.. what makes a good lover? Someone who is kinesthetically in tune with others and themselves for a start. Can you listen to a response? Are you open to hearing if something needs to be firmer or less aggressive? Unfortuanately we're not all built that way.. and that is for some a language that can't be taught. Creating a safe space for expression and exploration! absolutely imperative. Love this thread. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frenchlover22 261 Report post Posted June 3, 2011 The best sex starts and ends between the ears. The most powerful organ we have needs to be engaged fully. That begins with the first contact, a good listener, respect and curiosity for discovering the other. When that happens and man and woman are in tune, interested and connecting, the other parts of the body are in for a wild time. Carress is key, teasing brings it to another level, a bit of fun and passion, light and hard, always giving. If each date I have is like that, my lover will reward me and I will keep inventing new ways to give her pleasure and companionship, even love! Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
