chavez 641 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Actaully this is a follow-up from a comment that a good friend made in the post ' would you mary a pornstar?" (I don't expect the ladies to reply but most likely they will tell me what an a. hole I am.) My friend said that he enjoyed sex with his wife, expected that this would be exclusive but also enjoyed sex outside of his marrage. He understood that this was selfish but it was what it was. Thumbs up for honesty! On the otherhand I do not enjoy sex with my wife. It is far too rare and far to boaring. Neither of these are my fault. As a result , totally I don't have sex with her. I don't touch her sexually , I kiss only on the cheek. If she were to touch me sexually I would draw away. She has become my sister. I care for her but sex is not in the equation. In the last year I have began to feel sorry for her. I'm not sure that she would be sexually interrested in anyone or that anyone could be sexually satisfied with her but if such a person exists ( even as one of 6 in a heirum), I would be glad if they found each other. If she wanted to share her experience I would listen; if she wanted to keep the secret I am o.k. with that. I would still keep her and all her needs. She is an important part of my life, just not a sexual part; and that was her choice. This is the point of my post: Is there anyone else quite willing to share their wife , not for their enjoyment but for her's ? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Code Blue 3585 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 No glib answer here! No-one has the depth around your particular situation either. But, just to be contrarian, could your desire to have your wife "satisfied" by someone other than you simply be a way for you to feel better about the way you treat her? I'm not trying to hijack either.... CB Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loopie 15358 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Couples work out all these workarounds for everything else. Just to be stereotypical, if a man's wife loves shopping for clothes and he finds this boring but she still wants company, she calls up her girlfriends and goes with them. If the man wants to talk about sports but the wife doesn't care about that stuff, he goes to a sports bar with his buddies. Nobody minds. But when it comes to sex, people become the most possessive. It's pretty unlikely that two people are going to be 100% compatable. To me, if you have a relationship where everything else is great, but you're sexually incapatable, that's still a pretty damn good relationship and it's worth finding a workaround for the sex stuff so that you can hold onto it. If I were in a relationship/marriage with somebody who was a great friend and we were capatable in terms of managing our household, raising our kids, having fun pursuing common interests, but just didn't turn each other on, I would encourage her to seek sexual satisfaction wherever she could find it. Especially if I sensed that she resented me for her sexual disastisfaction. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 And futher to loopie's comments...if you do not have a sexual relationship any longer, how would you qualify it as "sharing your wife"? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan**** Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Maybe she is a step ahead of you..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chavez 641 Report post Posted September 24, 2011 Fair question CB , The answer is no. Loopie, I suspect you are right. I will have to look into doing that thing. Eliz and Scott, that comment in indeed an "lol"..... lmfo thanks for everyone's input. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
