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Pick up lines...best / worst / funniest

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This is the best line i have heard so far...was ROFL:

 

One of my reg was telling me how he approaches ladies in bars...he goes up to them and says:

 

I may not be the tallest or the most handsome man..but with a smile and grin... he shows up his american express platine card!!!!! :D

 

I dont know about other ladies but a sense of humour will always work for me :)

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Guest ***nno**n***
I'm gonna nickname you "Big Toe"...I 'm gonna bang you on every piece of furniture I own...

 

This one is my favorite I've heard it before.

 

One of my best friends is a black guy who gets hit on all the time.

The last time we were out these 2 white older ladies were giving him a bunch of cheesy lines. Then they got into the "I'm whiter than she is" stuff.

The last one said " I'm so white I glow in the dark.." Then I step in and reply " I'm so white I'm invisible" and proceeded to walk away. He started laughing and they were not happy with me lol.

 

My favorite lines I've heard,

 

- Love your shoes, they would look fabulous on my bedroom floor.

- Want to watch my friend and I arm wrestle? Winner gets to take you home.

- (bets before playing pool) If I win I get to fuck you, If you win, you get to fuck me.

- I just bought a new bed, wanna break it in with me?

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Guest ChantalSummers

Some of these are so cute!!

 

Here's some cheesy ones that lack creativity and have actually been used on me hehe:

 

Ouch, you're just so beautiful it hurts.

 

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

 

Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me! (I finally turn around) he just stares and then says oh I thought I knew you but now I really wanna know you!

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Hi ! My name is Lee ! You want me ! You shall see !! Wanna shag ?

 

That one is untried and unproven as of yet ;) just came off the cuff there......

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Do you believe in love at first sight?

(If she says yes) lets go to my place and make love then.

(If she says no) good neither do I let's fuck first.

 

I'm a genie rub me and and wishes will be granted.

(Well maybe only my wishes)

 

I'm a super villain, being the last man on earth can be arranged.

 

Wanna be a movie star? You can star in my home porn collection.

 

Heaven called their missing an angel.

 

Hmm you remind me of a casino. liquor in the front and poker in the back.

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"If women used pick-up lines"

A few of these were roll-your-eyes corny fun (I'm also not too proud to say they'd probably work on me...but then, I'm an easy mark ;) )

 

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Guest M****ella's C****s (retire

These make me laugh, I can't take credit for them. You can thank Jenna Marbles from youtube. I will post the link below if you'd like to watch the video.

 

Mary had a little, let me touch your boobies.

 

On your mark get set suck my dick.

 

roses are red violets are blue I want to get you pregnant.

 

Rocks, paper, take off all your clothes

 

Sticks and stones may break my bones I want to jam my penis in you.

 

Is there a mirror in your pants cause you look fuck'in sexual tonight.

 

What's your sign? Is it please let me touch your ass?

 

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