Guest **sh****he***ac***th Report post Posted May 16, 2014 Throughout my whole life I've been told I am a "nice guy" and that nice guys "finish" last. Read whatever you want into this. Discuss. LOL Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CristyCurves 169032 Report post Posted May 16, 2014 Yes you are right because a nice guy allows the woman to cum first;) 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest **sh****he***ac***th Report post Posted May 16, 2014 The pleasure to do so would be all mine! ;) Yes you are right because a nice guy allows the woman to cum first;) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FunValerie 8573 Report post Posted May 16, 2014 I like that answer. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
star99 4852 Report post Posted May 16, 2014 I know what you mean, I was kinda in a friends with benefits relationship not long ago, and I have no clue what happened, but we no longer contact each other. ive been told many times that im a nice guy, and I try to be, and this is the thanks I get??? 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest R**3*9 Report post Posted May 16, 2014 I would say I classify as a nice guy. LOL However I don't equate nice with: subservient, shy, accommodating, push-over, forgettable, not-fun. I'm the kind of nice guy who treats people with respect... I smile at people when I meet them...every time not just when I want something or it suits me... I listen to people when they speak... I take the time to get to know people even if I don't have any 'good' reason too... I can make a point without being a dick or make others feel less important... What do I get in return? Well, there isn't one assistant in the office who won't help me with what ever I need whether they work in my section or not and quickly. I usually get what I want when I want it no questions asked... I get away with saying what's on my mind without offending people... I can flirt with every woman I meet without coming across as sleazy....and I usually do. :icon_biggrin: - flirt not come across as sleazy. LOL Friends, colleagues, acquaintances want to do things with me and for me I don't have to make them... I'm really good at making people feel good about themselves... Most important, I can feel good about myself. I wouldn't say that this nice guy finishes first more or less middle of the pack...but I'm OK with that. LOL Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *l**e Report post Posted May 16, 2014 ladies first and at least a 2:1 ratio whenever possible!! I'm a nice guy too!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrgreen760 37785 Report post Posted May 16, 2014 Women always arrive before me, whether I'm opening a door or......you know ;) Peace MG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piano8950 32577 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I used to be one of those "nice guys". And it sucked. I read this somewhere, and while remaining true to myself, it has made my life much better. Paraphrasing since I don't remember the exact words. Best advice for life comes in a plane, put your own mask on first before helping others. Not many people respect the person who doesn't respect themself. Don't be a dick, but don't be a pushover as well. And you definitely don't need to constantly be the martyr and them expect other people to help you. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78396 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I guess if you choose the way you act so that it maximizes what you will get in return you are probably cheating someone.... most likely yourself. I would like to think I choose how I act based on a set of values that I live my life by because it makes me feel good about myself. People with similar values as me will probably consider me a good guy people with conflicting values will not think so favorably about me. Do I finish 1st or last.... what day is this.... lol... to day I did not fare so well who knows what tomorrow will bring but in the balance of thing I can look at myself and be happy with who I am..... that's a 1st for me where it really matters. Just my opinion Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Someone Someonesson 100 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I generally don't tend to think about finishing first or last. If I'm to give my opinion though, I think that something like a person's social charisma has a greater effect on whether or not you would fare better or worse. If you're a charismatic individual, people will tend to be drawn to you whether you're nice or not. Being nice might just have the added benefit of getting somebody to stick around. I don't think possessing the ability to show kindness necessarily gives someone some sort of predisposition to finish last. Just my personal thoughts on the matter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest **sh****he***ac***th Report post Posted May 17, 2014 Many of my female friends have told me that I am the sweetest and kindest person they know. I have also been told that I am too nice. I am mature, fit, healthy, financially independent, personable, not ugly, confident without being arrogant, considerate and have a sense of humour. What I do not get is why some women are attracted to men who self-centred and arrogant. They often treat women poorly. I am intelligent enough to know when I am being taken for granted or being taken advantage of. My wife is deceased and I am totally on my own free to see whomever I want. I don't lack female companionship but I have kept things on a non-romantic level with them all. I am very true to myself and I am not into games of any sort so I am very honest and open with everyone who knows me. At this juncture, I am content with seeing companions (CERB) and will leave it at that for the time being. I would like to know why some ladies are attracted to not so nice guys. Not that I have the ability to become one as that is clearly not me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CristyCurves 169032 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 Many of my female friends have told me that I am the sweetest and kindest person they know. I have also been told that I am too nice. I am mature, fit, healthy, financially independent, personable, not ugly, confident without being arrogant, considerate and have a sense of humour. What I do not get is why some women are attracted to men who self-centred and arrogant. They often treat women poorly. I am intelligent enough to know when I am being taken for granted or being taken advantage of. My wife is deceased and I am totally on my own free to see whomever I want. I don't lack female companionship but I have kept things on a non-romantic level with them all. I am very true to myself and I am not into games of any sort so I am very honest and open with everyone who knows me. At this juncture, I am content with seeing companions (CERB) and will leave it at that for the time being. I would like to know why some ladies are attracted to not so nice guys. Not that I have the ability to become one as that is clearly not me. You sound perfect;) perhaps that's the problem. A lot of women like a chase and the guys that need fixing or need to be chased. "Nice guys" are often left because they are nice quite simply, they don't need to be repaired aren't a challenge per say and are complete. Not much of a challenge. Sad perhaps, and makes no sense but some see those arrogant pricks as a challenge and a challenge can be exciting. Although usually it never ends well. Additional Comments: I know what you mean, I was kinda in a friends with benefits relationship not long ago, and I have no clue what happened, but we no longer contact each other. ive been told many times that im a nice guy, and I try to be, and this is the thanks I get??? I've learned when dealing with anyone, do because you want to, give because you can and expect nothing and you'll never have to question why or feel used or disappointed:) 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 17, 2014 Many of my female friends have told me that I am the sweetest and kindest person they know. I have also been told that I am too nice. I am mature, fit, healthy, financially independent, personable, not ugly, confident without being arrogant, considerate and have a sense of humour. What I do not get is why some women are attracted to men who self-centred and arrogant. They often treat women poorly. I am intelligent enough to know when I am being taken for granted or being taken advantage of. My wife is deceased and I am totally on my own free to see whomever I want. I don't lack female companionship but I have kept things on a non-romantic level with them all. I am very true to myself and I am not into games of any sort so I am very honest and open with everyone who knows me. At this juncture, I am content with seeing companions (CERB) and will leave it at that for the time being. I would like to know why some ladies are attracted to not so nice guys. Not that I have the ability to become one as that is clearly not me. Hey, you! Keep it simple. You just be you. Confucius man say: circle's don't fit into squares and don't forget that there's good girls out there too. Just some silly morning, BC(before coffee), ramblings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Midnite-Energies 110563 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I believe a lot of the "nice guys finish last" stigma comes from women who have things to repair within themselves. People generally go after the person who they believe is the best for them at any given point in time. If you have esteem issues or something unresolved you may gravitate towards the person who can provide what you believe you deserve. As you realize and come to terms with what's inside, those who you are attracted to generally become better people with more right than wrong. Unfortunately confident people with much goodness inside tend to see the good in others whether they can see it themselves. This is sometimes where the "saving" trend comes in. Unfortunately you cannot help or save someone who doesn't want to be helped or doesn't recognize it within. As for the other, I think people should cum when it feels good and natural for them not at any given point in time. Why put pressure on when or who or how...just do it! 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest **sh****he***ac***th Report post Posted May 17, 2014 Hey, you! Keep it simple. You just be you. Confucius man say: circle's don't fit into squares and don't forget that there's good girls out there too. Just some silly morning, BC(before coffee), ramblings. As always, you are sweet and adorable Peachy...many thanks! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WhiteKnight 1413 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 (edited) I used to call myself a Nice guy. However, a little while ago, a lady friend told me: "You are not a Nice guy, you are a Good guy!". I asked what the difference was? She told me Nice guys are being nice, at least partly, because they expect something from a woman (consciously, or unconsciously), and when this expectation is not fulfilled, frustration may build up. A Good guy is nice because he enjoys to, he has his life together and is relaxed about it all. She picks up on this underlying vibe and is attracted to one and not the other. She told me that many ladies use all available signals (body language, energy, manners, how one dresses, etc.) to size up a man as quickly as she can. If you are, like me, a naturally quiet, reserved man, even though nice, it makes it more difficult for the ladies to differentiate between the Nice and the Good. Some are not attracted to the quiet guys, some are intrigued by the mystery. In my experience, the later are sometimes themselves a bit reserved and brainy, so maybe they have atomes crochus? Then she told me a secret: "You already have a golden heart and your life together. Simply work on being a playful (but not silly) bad boy at the right time and your social life will change forever". She had a mysterious but very attractive grin on her face while telling me this... like she told me the deepest secret of the Secret Women's Guild. :) Since then I applied myself to let this playfulness inhabiting my heart out, in the right way, at the right time. It is actually not easy, I am not quite there yet, but it is worth it lol. A companion told me that my new tag line described me well: "I am like good quality French vanilla ice cream, sometimes with exotic toppings such as spicy black pepper, silly jelly beans or sweet balsamic vinegar reduction". You know you should not have too much of it, but you can't resist (or that is what I hope anyway hi hi hi). Food for thought :) Edited May 17, 2014 by WhiteKnight Clarification 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tallguy007 4172 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 You sound perfect;) perhaps that's the problem. A lot of women like a chase and the guys that need fixing or need to be chased. "Nice guys" are often left because they are nice quite simply, they don't need to be repaired aren't a challenge per say and are complete. Reminds me of a quote I like quite a bit: "A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does." (Don't know who said that) 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I'm a strong believer in being yourself. There's no need to put on a front or try to be something that you're not because it won't be authentic to who you are. By being something that you're not, you may push the right person for you away. There's many reasons why someone may or may not like you. Overanalyzing things may just make situations more complicated than they have to be. Why do that to yourself and the potential person you may want to date? I think patience come into play when you're dating. I think sometime when we are dating we are thing of finding "a partner" instead of "the partner". Remember acts can only last so long. If it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be. Putting the bad boy act on reminds me of this movie. But this is just my opinion. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WhiteKnight 1413 Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I agree with you and that is not what I tried to convey! I should have used a different term. For me it is about sharing the playfulness that exist in me and celebrating life in the small things. I guess I feel like a bad boy even though to you I would appear normal :) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted May 17, 2014 I agree with you and that is not what I tried to convey! I should have used a different term. For me it is about sharing the playfulness that exist in me and celebrating life in the small things. I guess I feel like a bad boy even though to you I would appear normal :) Awe, there's nothing wrong with showing your playful side. That would actually help create a fun atmosphere. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest **sh****he***ac***th Report post Posted May 17, 2014 Be yourself as everyone else is taken! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
