References

[frednorth470 3830]

Hi,

I noticed that most of the established SPs have a request for a reference for clients who they have not met before. Just wondering how one would establish a reference with SPs when most listed in the reference list require references to be seen. Kind of an chicken and egg syndrome. :)

[roamingguy 300291]

If you don't have a reference let the lady know when you first contact her. She will have other ways to screen/verify you.

But in your introductory email to the lady be open and provide other information to her (real name, phone number, email address etc)

 

RG

[Athos 108589]

In my experience you have nothing to worry about in disclosing some personal, verifiable information to a reputable lady from this board. The ladies understand that not everyone will have a reference. In some instances it is because it is your first time, or it may be because ladies you might have called on have retired. In any event, there are other ways of providing verification. Just ask.

[fortunateone 156618]

Hi,

I noticed that most of the established SPs have a request for a reference for clients who they have not met before. Just wondering how one would establish a reference with SPs when most listed in the reference list require references to be seen. Kind of an chicken and egg syndrome. :)

 

 

Some of them will have alternatives. One alternative might be contacting them via your handle on this site, then follow that with your real contact info if they will consider pursuing it further.

 

Sometimes the references are linked to how the sp sets up her appt schedule, if she needs to book a location she can be pretty locked into that time you request. If you do not have a proven track record, you may not be able to verify you will show up and/or not cancel last minute. She may have policy in place regarding late cancellations as well.

 

The other aspect is safety issues.

 

So if she has alternative screening methods, those might be key areas that you will have to address.

[JessyCeleste 14070]

To echo what fortunateone said, there are other means of verification that SPs will use. We get the chicken and egg thing. We remember it from highschool when first job-hunting and pulling out our hair saying, 'How am I supposed to GET experience if nobody will hire me without experience!?!?!?!?'

Each SP has different means. Don't get spooked if she asks for a ref.. its often a first question but not the only way. As fortunateone explained, the best thing to do is to be fourtcoming with info without having to be asked.

Sending a PM here is valuable to us for several reasons I wont get into.

You can follow this up with a text msg or call from your visible phone number. Don't try spoofing... we know.... and its one of those major RED FLAGS... so definitely avoid spooking her by trying to hide who you are. The more personal info you can offer, the easier it will be for you. If she is reputable, you have nothing to worry about. But usually just a PM and a phone conversation wth a displayed number will be enough. Id also advise you to be fourth-coming not only with info on who you are but also a bit about yourself and what you are looking for.

IE Hi my name is ____ my lyla handle is ____ and I am new to this. I noticed your ad and Im very intrigued and would like to know more when you have time. I am a ___ year old, professional gent in the field of ___ and have just left a rather complicated relationship. I enjoy a vast variety of music and am an avid golfer. I really don't know what else to say but encourage you to ask me about anything you would like to know. If we end up meeting each other, I want you to feel you know me a little.

I also was wondering if you enjoy role play at all? And I am wondering if a downtown outcall would be possible?

Looking forward to hearing from you. Please feel free to text me at the number below, but only during business hours and with a discreet msg.

Thanks!

John Smith

613-555-5555

You don't have to be quite as long winded but I wanted to offer you a variety of things you could say. Most importantly, be sure that you read her ad and website before asking questions. It shows a level of care and respect for her time.

Remember that SPs are busy folks who often have another job or business we run. Time is valuable for us as it is for anyone.

Finally, Just as we are aware of red-flags, we also make note of good signs...so chat a bit and show your personality and she will feel more at ease.

Good luck.xo