How to stay professional at all times?

[alohan 2]

A few weeks ago, I spoke to a former hobbyist. He told me that he had times where he got a little too emotionally involved when he became a regular.
I can understand that. Some SPs are talkative (maybe it's in their nature or they want to be accommodating or maybe they're not in the mood and just want to shorten the time of physical contact), but if the clients talk too, it could create a bond between them and it becomes more personal.
I think this might be especially the case for those who only go to one SP. They might find the SP special, but SPs have a lot of clients and none of them are special to her.
I also think we should never forget that it is a profession and some people may be faking deep connection or using emotions to get more money easily. 

I'm still not used to all this and I don't know if it will ever happen to me. To avoid this, I want to know more strategies and opinions : 
-As a customer, how do you stay professional ? Are there times you think some SPs are great people and you want to know better personally?
-(And if any SP see this) As a worker, how do you make sure your client doesn't get too emotionally involved ? Is it maybe a common strategy to use the clients' emotions and need to be close to someone to make them regular?

***no judgments***

[monogamishfun 5]

On 12/11/2023 at 6:51 PM, alohan said:

-As a customer, how do you stay professional ? Are there times you think some SPs are great people and you want to know better personally?

As a customer, it's all about letting the provider taking the lead when it comes to the conversation - and to know going in where your own personal boundaries are.

For me, one of the reasons I hobby instead of entering the dating world for my non-monogamous encounters is that I don't want to create emotional bonds that conflict with my marriage.

That all being said... I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious about the lives and backstories of some of my favourite SPs! 🙃

[Kinky123 3]

I've been having a few few SPs already and can help here:
-As a customer, how do you stay professional ? Are there times you think some SPs are great people and you want to know better personally?
You just need to be courteous and of good company at all time, as with anyone else. Everytime you ask a personal question about a SP, remember that its security is depending on its anonymity. They are exposing themselves to stalkers and scammers too and you could be viewed as one of those anytime, its in their interest to not divulge such information after all.
Personally I don't expect the truth everytime I ask a question too, but its good to at least build trust, it is still an opportunity to do so and its always kind to show interest and that you're not full of yourself, whatever the SP decides to do with it after entirely belongs to this person.

Mind that these SPs, with a lot of experience, exactly know what to say to some customers anyway, its not just a game, its an investment for them.
Never engage with SPs if you aren't emotionally stable or aware, if you look for a serious relationship, or able to accept that this will just be roleplay at most.

If you are looking for personnal relationship, stay out of SPs directories.

[Rodney925 8]

Well said Kinky123 & Monogamishfun🤙

[Andee of Burlington 23]

I treat my clients like I would any other person who I deal with. If they are courteous and clean and do not try to push my boundaries, then I give them my attention, and I treat them with respect and kindness but I’d never fake be nice just for the sake of being nice if I don’t feel like it, if.  If a client mistakes that for more than it is, he will probably reveal that to me at which point I will kindly remind him of the fact that this is a business arrangement and most times they are cool with that. Just because I am nice to you doesn’t mean that I am in love with you or want to pursue a relationship .

I’m treating you like I would any other person who is decent to me. So why should it be any different just because I’m a provider. Those that play up the be nice just to get something out of the person will find themselves burning out quite quickly. If I don’t care for a client, the first time I meet him I have the choice to never have to see him again. I can count on one hand over the years the number of clients that I had to set straight about our arrangement because in their head, they let their fantasy run away  With what they perceived to be something that wasn’t true, but I didn’t let it go on long enough to do any damage.

 

I think it takes intuition, maturity, honesty, and astuteness to recognize when one needs to address the elephant in the room. If the other person is unwilling or incapable of being on the same page as you then that’s when it’s your obligation to recuse yourself of the situation and not let it get out of hand.

sometimes providers and clients do attract those who are infatuated with them and may pursue them, but I think that is in the minority compared to most provider/client relationships 

[amandaschmanda 10]

For me I just treat clients like good friends and often remind them of the negative repercussions of dating me, lmao. If they really can't keep it together, like once I had a client stealth me because he saw my OF vids not using condoms, then I block them and I'm sure they understand why. I think to fall too deep into the rabbit hole, like the client I just mentioned did, you really have to lack empathy and that would of course be the initial issue to address with yourself. 

[amandaschmanda 10]

On 12/19/2023 at 8:17 AM, monogamishfun said:

As a customer, it's all about letting the provider taking the lead when it comes to the conversation - and to know going in where your own personal boundaries are.

For me, one of the reasons I hobby instead of entering the dating world for my non-monogamous encounters is that I don't want to create emotional bonds that conflict with my marriage.

That all being said... I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious about the lives and backstories of some of my favourite SPs! 🙃

It's definitely more than okay to be curious! You can ask away. I don't feel as though seeing your SP as a person creates the illusion of a relationship. In my experience anyone who's crossed boundaries has LACKED empathy and seeing me as a person. They may ask questions, but it's only to get a confirmation bias to their already held beliefs. Example: I had a client ask me "do you have a hard time dating?" I answered honestly, "No, I find my dominatrix roommate has a harder time," and he burst into tears wailing that he 'didn't want to hear of my boyfriend creampieing me before appointments'. It took me a very long pause to understand what the actual fuck he was talking about before I could even address it. But the way he jumped to such insane, emotional conclusions can illustrate clearly that his fear was that I had a boyfriend, but his hope was that I have a very, very difficult time dating. 

Genuine curiosity isn't going to get you into trouble but make sure that you're not holding some deep seeded hope that you're the one she's going to find true love with. As I said above, if you find yourself lacking the empathy to understand that most women don't get into escorting to have a traditional life, then you're likely too far gone already. You have to be really honest with yourself, and that's hard for a lot of people.

 

And this rant is by no means directed at monogamishfun just an extension of the idea that communicating isn't going to get you in hot water, lmao.