Andee 220524 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 (edited) I have a few friends who are SPs who are married to wonderful, understanding men who support their decision to work. I know a few others who "retired" at the request of their spouses because of whatever reasons. Personally, I have never found a man (other than some good male friends) who would have been open to me continuing to work if we got involved. Although they claimed to be "open minded", they still regarded my "work" as cheating. The ones which appeared okay and in even some cases enthusiastic (yes I have been approached many times) were either extremely submissive or "sissy boys" or domineering "pimp" types, none of which I would ever want to be in a relationship with it, working or not. I am just wondering how many of you would actually be comfortable dating an SP (who continues to work) and even live with, or marry her. Or, would you want her stop working if you got involved? How open-minded are you really. Oh, and here's another zinger, how would you feel if your daughter or sister started working as an SP. Sometimes we say it's okay for others, but "not in my backyard". Edited July 31, 2009 by Mature Angela fix typo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest B***ke Ba**** Report post Posted July 17, 2009 You have to do what makes you happy! I think it would be ok to have a SP for a partner if she was doing it cause she wanted too.Sex is sex its basically two people getting there rocks off. Making love is more getting in each others head and hart. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bylogger 136 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 This goes back a bit. I got to know my friend before I discovered she had career plans. She was "adventurous". This was all back in the early 80's. Sadly a drunk driver went through a red light, and she was gone. So would I date or marry someone in the business? Yes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
esoterica 624 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 I dated an SP in my mid-20s. It was not her job which was the problem, it was the trail of white up her nose. I have no problems with my partner having physical sex with somebody else, as long as the restriction (or lack of) goes both ways. What is important to me is emotional fidelity. (And safe sex). So, I'd not mind if my partner or daughter or sister were an escort. It's the extra baggage (e.g. drugs, possessiveness, jealousy, lack of commitment) which is the problem in relationships with multiple sex partners, not the beautiful act of sex. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 I could do it, but it would have to be a relationship that was firmly entrenched in trust. That takes time no matter who the person is. The chances are unlikely but if I met someone who I truly wanted to be with, I'd be a fool to not pursue it. But yeah, it's really all about trust and that's a hard thing to find on that level. Posted via Mobile Device Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Akhenaton 221 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 That's really sad, sorry to hear that :( This goes back a bit. I got to know my friend before I discovered she had career plans. She was "adventurous". This was all back in the early 80's. Sadly a drunk driver went through a red light, and she was gone. So would I date or marry someone in the business? Yes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest *u*****o*******1 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 I find it may be easier to just say you would be able to date or Marry a SP, then actually being fully involved with that person and seeing or knowing for yourself how it may feel or how it would effect you. I mean of course all us men here heart you fine ladies big time!! so perhaps some biast in the answers. After stating this i may or may not i can't give a definite answer because i don't know what it would be or feel like to me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
coachg 388 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 I would like to think that I could date or even marry a working SP or EP but truthfully who knows how they would handle it and what types of happenings would set off negative feelings. I think that the two people involved would have to have a very strong, serious relationship where both parties involved were totally honest with one another ALL the time and discussed any potenial problems before they balloned into something serious. If both partners talked about the potenial pitfalls of such a relationship before they got into it too deep, maybe the could recognize any potenial threats and with that knowledge could work thru any problems that may arise. That said, there are also intangibles that could arise because of different partners, feelings, etc..and what boundries does the man have as far as extra affairs go? I think that any relationship of this nature would take a lot of thought and maybe even a little professional help but if two people are soul mates then anything is possible. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nylonfeetlover69 100 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 date yes, marry no Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123366 Report post Posted July 17, 2009 date yes, marry no curious to your reasoning... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
s********m 116 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 What a great question!!! To have that open-ended relationship Just how long would it really last. I have many guy friends that sure it may work but really The bigger question would have be happiness and trust in your partner right. Also thier are many types of Relations other then marriage ( Can't spell the word anymore so why do it ) lol Just my opinion of course!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MandalayBay 575 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 I wouldn't have the emotional strength to be in a relationship with a male escort. I even feel a bit jealous when my significant other goes to see the female exotic dancers without me. (Insane ... I know.) Yet he is accepting my job until the end of July. Although I'm retiring at the request of my significant other (as I genuinely believe he's the one for me), I know I would make a great girlfriend or wife to had I ended up with a different man who was okay with my continuing this work. As an escort I am making VERY good money that could help provide my family and significant other with an amazing lifestyle. If he were okay with it, it would truly be the best of both worlds. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 curious to your reasoning... Just got into a conversation with a friend who's an SP who believes her barrier to finding true love has to do with her chosen profession. I am not suggesting she try to date a client, but I told her I believed there are more open-minded men out there than we think. The problem is finding the right connection. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ava Foxx 1747 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Very interesting topic. I will say this; there ARE men out there who will accept their SO's choice to be an SP. They are very accepting and very open to dating, and then falling in love with, an SP. These men will fully support a woman who has chosen a career as an SP. They will ask how "work" was and if you had a bad day, they will offer support and encouragement. They will tell you that they are proud of you for making a difference in someone's life (applies in the cases of the gentlemen who are lonely or who are in sexless marriages and need to feel desired). They see the business from both sides...the men's side and the SP's side. They also see the business from the "business" aspect and the personal aspect AND they are okay with the fact that you make personal connections and bond with certain gentlemen. They are secure and feel no jealousy (even if you want them to at times...just a little bit ;)). They will never bring it up or use it against if you have an argument and they will never call you derogatory names that can, and are, used in this business. The life you share together will be as "normal" as if you weren't an SP. They are not "doormats", pimps or perverts. Just open minded and accepting and they will treat you like a princess and cherish you for the treasure that you are. I could go on and on, but I think you all get my point :). These men are special in their own right. They are not easy to find, but TRUST ME there are men out there who will accept, support (in every aspect) and LOVE a woman who chooses a career as an SP. I know there is. BTW, there is NOTHING wrong with a man not accepting a woman's choice to be an SP. I'm just saying there are men who do accept it :). 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
raven_2000 100 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Well i was engaged to a stripper once apon a time. For me i would not have a probelm with dating or marrying an SP, Stripper or Porn girl. My only thing is that she would have to be retired from the business. If it was true love, id wait for her to quit and id never make her quit. The choice is and always will be hers. If it was love, then it will work in the end. Ive been in the adult business all my life and have dated and like i said engaged. Its the person that you are in the inside that counts. There are a lot of married couples who work in the Porn business Holly Houston to name one as an example. Another is Kelly Maddison. Sry, im a big boobie fan :p Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
d*mm*y 887 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Zero issue if they love me they will come back. The one draw back is the lack of sex, SP's don't have a lot of sex with the SO when they are working. Strippers are a better bet for the horny among us. My Stripper ex wife and I had a great life, we had 2 kids and relatively open relationship, I knew that no other guy could compete and that she would always end up in my bed. Then one day some total A-Hole shows up with her and they tell me there are truly in love and she is leaving. hmmmm turns out that because I let her have that open relationship with scum bag convinced her I must not love her. She went for a live in nanny and new Lexus $700 a week spending money and a nice turn of the century house off Gilmore and Kent to living on mother allowance, oh and the A-hole dragged her along for 7 years before she dumped him. So ladies if you want this open relationship accept is as a loving relationship don't come back on him because her tolerated it and then tell him he does not love you. I remember dropping in one night at a club in Toronto were my wife was working she had found some guy that she want me to meet because she wanted to do MMF with him. When I finally arrived he laid this guilt trip on her about how she should leave me because there was no way that I could love her because of what she was doing and was OK with what she proposed we do. At that time she was not so gullible. But if enough people tell you something you must start to believe it. For the record I still love her. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ava Foxx 1747 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 The one draw back is the lack of sex, SP's don't have a lot of sex with the SO when they are working. I disagree, but that is just me :-) So ladies if you want this open relationship accept is as a loving relationship don't come back on him because her tolerated it and then tell him he does not love you. I TOTALLY agree!!! 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123366 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Very interesting topic. I will say this; there ARE men out there who will accept their SO's choice to be an SP. They are very accepting and very open to dating, and then falling in love with, an SP. These men will fully support a woman who has chosen a career as an SP. They will ask how "work" was and if you had a bad day, they will offer support and encouragement. They will tell you that they are proud of you for making a difference in someone's life (applies in the cases of the gentlemen who are lonely or who are in sexless marriages and need to feel desired). They see the business from both sides...the men's side and the SP's side. They also see the business from the "business" aspect and the personal aspect AND they are okay with the fact that you make personal connections and bond with certain gentlemen. They are secure and feel no jealousy (even if you want them to at times...just a little bit ;)). They will never bring it up or use it against if you have an argument and they will never call you derogatory names that can, and are, used in this business. The life you share together will be as "normal" as if you weren't an SP. They are not "doormats", pimps or perverts. Just open minded and accepting and they will treat you like a princess and cherish you for the treasure that you are. I could go on and on, but I think you all get my point :). These men are special in their own right. They are not easy to find, but TRUST ME there are men out there who will accept, support (in every aspect) and LOVE a woman who chooses a career as an SP. I know there is. BTW, there is NOTHING wrong with a man not accepting a woman's choice to be an SP. I'm just saying there are men who do accept it :). Ava you are correct...i have dated these types of men...:-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest S****an Report post Posted July 18, 2009 From an emotional point of view I think I could date (and marry) a working SP, but I wonder about the practical point of view - it seems to me that just like any small business owner you girls work very long and hard days, with tough schedules that have to be adjusted frequently. Certainly its very difficult when one or both partner's schedules don't mesh no matter what the occupation (my own travel filled job has cost me more than one relationship)- and that might create friction in its own right. Anyway. more power to you ladies. I hope you all find the right SO and that one day society recognizes your work as the valued calling it is. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spud271 47779 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 As previously mentioned, I dated an SP for two years. Everything worked out fine. No issues with sex at all, it was very passionate and we cared about each other very much. I don't think everyone is strong enough to handle dating an SP, or get involved for the wrong reasons. They mistake lust for love, most just become jealous over time and the relationship will end. I am not a jealous person in any way shape or form, so things worked out just fine. It only ended because of family commitments. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MandalayBay 575 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 The one draw back is the lack of sex, SP's don't have a lot of sex with the SO when they are working. Strippers are a better bet for the horny among us. I thought the exact same thing right before going on vacation with my significant other recently. I had worked a lot the week previously and was absolutely drained emotionally and physically. Driving to the airport to pick him up, I hoped I could satisfy him sexually feeling as exhausted as I was feeling. The moment I saw him, something chemically happened and our lovemaking was just as passionate and loving as it always was. When you are in love, your body has a way of getting turned on around the person you love, no matter how exhausted you are. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma Alexandra 123366 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 I thought the exact same thing right before going on vacation with my significant other recently. I had worked a lot the week previously and was absolutely drained emotionally and physically. Driving to the airport to pick him up, I hoped I could satisfy him sexually feeling as exhausted as I was feeling. The moment I saw him, something chemically happened and our lovemaking was just as passionate and loving as it always was. When you are in love, your body has a way of getting turned on around the person you love, no matter how exhausted you are. If you are in love then you will be more energized when you see your mate... unless maybe if your married or something silly like that...hahaha. the perfect relationship for an sp is to have a bf that lives in another place then you will always be happy and energized when you see each other...:wink: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buggernot 588 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 When you are in love, your body has a way of getting turned on around the person you love, no matter how exhausted you are. I think that the problems or concerns, for example, would come from living together all the time. If you have 2 or 3 clients in a day and you give them your usual level of service and intensity, how much will there be left at the end of the day for your SO? Every situation is different of course, but there could be varying libidos and thoughts of what the best way is to unwind. There are even times when I hook up with certain SP's, where I'm the last appointment of the day and I know that they have had multiple clients beforehand. The service stays the same but subconsciously, I wonder how much they're into it, or maybe she isn't able to get as wet as usual. So if this was a SO, even though there would be trust and love and understanding, it's easy to see how insecurities could creep in. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
reallywhiteguy 100 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 I really would like to think it would not be a problem as I consider myself opend minded. At least it is honest work...not like being a lawyer or car salesman.:lol: However, that is easy to say until one is faced with the reality. I think it would be important that her work be kept totally separate from our lives together and that there not be any extended encounters of 2-3 days or longer. However, some of the most interesting people I have met in my life are sp's. I have become "smitten" more than once and not just because of the physical encounter. The conversation has been wonderful and I truly believe married people should be best freinds. The question then beocmes, are the stories told by the sp's that make them so fascinating and interesting the truth? No offence ladies, but your jobs do involve a fair bit of acting, with just a pinch of bullshit thrown in. :-D Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ava Foxx 1747 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Ava you are correct...i have dated these types of men...:-) Any man who dates you is very lucky :). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
