Sex Work: A Hobby or an Art Form?

[PatrickGC 10792]

Being disabled and a client of sex workers over the years means, for me, a conscious effort to avoid using labels and stereotypes in order to keep the issue focused on people's humanity, and indeed the right to great sex for everyone regardless of their standing in society. In other words all people are human beings first and foremost and all are entitled to full expression and experience in carrying on their lives.

 

For me a date with someone who has made sex and eroticism their profession, is in many ways far more meaningful than just the physical aspects. There is a large emotional very personal aspect. As you might have guessed I am a romantic, and wouldn't have it any other way :). I have spent time with true masters of their field. Indeed "artisans" in the highest sense in the work. But that too is just another form of label. One which is meant to infer high praise in this context.

 

Initially, and with the urging of a few wise friends, I went on my first eight as a form of rebellion against the not-so-subtle forms of marginalization the health-care system implies. It very quickly evolved into "Wow, this is what I've been missing!" It quickly evolved into something which is very integral to my life.

 

Earlier today I noticed the terms "hobby" and "hobbyist" which denote for me a much more casual [perhaps less important] perspective. Which got me thinking: Where does the sex worker/date experienced fit for you? From both the client and worker perspective.

 

So let the discussion commence. From casual, hobby, art form, or is it a "a life's calling" as one person referred to it years ago, how far-reaching is the spectrum?

 

PatrickGC

[IsaMassage 54318]

To me is an Art form.. The art of seduction, the art of pleasure, the art of feeling and making feel, the art of connection,

Becoming an MA, was never in my plans but life has so many turns that here I am... Before I worked as an MA there was too many things I didn't know about the proffesion itself and just saw it through the eyes of the society... With all the stigma that made me see it as a bad thing... Now I see it from a very different prospective, I see that there is more than just the physical part(like you said Patrck) I have since I started working as an MA discovered many things about myself I would have never found otherwise...

[roamingguy 300291]

Well to me, seeing professional companions is not a hobby. How can intimate interpersonal relations be categorized as a hobby? Stamp collecting is a hobby. This is a lifestyle. And for me this lifestyle of seeing professional companions has taken the place of conventional dating. The ladies who are professional companions are very special. Giving of themselves, as has been said in other threads, body, mind and soul. Even on first meeting, treated like a boyfriend. Yes it is a art form, one only a very special lady can do. It is also a lifestyle I am glad I discovered. It filled a void when I gave up dating. The truth about this lifestyle is far different from the stereotype. It isn't about anonymous sexual encounters. It is a mutually beneficial lifestyle with no strings, no complications, with respect for one another. And seeing professional companions is every bit as fulfilling, to me that is, as was dating

A rambling

RG

[andflemcol 3975]

Very good question.

 

For me, I don't carve notches in my bed post every time I get lucky, I don't collect souvenirs from my providers, I don't try to bang as many providers as I can. I see sp's because I like to spend time with a woman that I truly enjoy spending time with, someone I respect and who respects me and who enjoys intimacy just as I do. I don't think that makes me a hobbyist. Nothing against hobbying as to each their own.

 

Maybe the question should be, "what defines a hobbyist?" In my mind, I think those that see many different sp's and look to fulfill a variety of fantasies is a hobbyist. That is not me. I like to spend time with ladies that I enjoy being with plain and simple. I don't think that makes be a hobbyist but I am not sure what to call what it is I am doing.

 

From the women's perspective, if they are able to promote emotions of elation and joy in me time after time, they are true masters of the art of seduction.

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

To me, it is everything. It has been a calling for many years although I never listened to it with my heart until recently. I love to give pleasure and to add something to those who see me. For those who truly enjoy what they do, it is an art form. There are so many ways to approach pleasure, seduction, sex and the tease and each one of us adds our own personality to the mix which makes it truly unique and personal. Not only that but to personalize it for the wonderful person we are spending our time with.

 

This is far from a hobby even though the term hobbyist is used. There are friendships and relationships created within the confines of the lifestyle and those are just as vibrant and necessary as any other relationship. Sure, there are those who want a little thrill or enjoyment every now and then but I'm sure they appreciate what they are given.

 

It's wonderful that so many on both sides of the lifestyle have embraced it and made it into the wonderful thing it is today even if old stigmas are still attached. Thankfully we have many wonderful activists, big and small, doing their part to adjust the perception directed at the lifestyle.

[Guest S****r]

....and I am contemplating how to articulate it from my perspective. I wonder how I will end up saying it? Hmmmmm........

 

I'll be back!

[Guest N***he**Ont**y]

After a heart breaking episode a few years ago I decided that I was not going to make any further emotional investment that a relationship requires. I enjoy my single life very much now and I enjoy the company now of a few select ladies who meet my needs. I have been blessed with new friendships and I thank these amazing ladies for their compaionship and their friendship. I agree wih RG it is a lifestyle and not a hobby.

[futileresistenz 28253]

I have adopted this lifestyle for the time being, as I prefer not to invest the emotional energy and time into a bona fide, long-term, committed relationship. This may just be a phase, or an enduring choice. I am not yet able to answer that question.

 

As many would agree, the terms hobby and hobbyist are unsuited as a moniker to this way of life, for reasons that I won't go into detail. They imply a non-serious, whimsical mindset, which at least to those who (as repeaters) over time have formed long-term bonds, seems like a devaluation of the comfort and well-being they have been able to find within our like-minded, accepting community. To them, the primary gratification derives from having meaningful, supportive and sustaining relationships, and only secondarily in the purely physical aspects. In practitioners who have perfected the skills of seduction and who genuinely love what they do, I consider this a true art form worthy of lofty esteem.

 

We operate in a part of the real world where the stereotypes fall away and the warmth, companionship, admiration and respect we share with each other resembles little of what the rest of the world believes this industry to be about. Tongue-in-cheek I will add, "Leave them in their ignorance."

 

I hope I'm excused for the very brief and furtive dart off topic.

FR

[TiffanyXXX000 21415]

To me I see my MA life as a expression on myself. I have always been a person much in touch with her sensuality. I enjoy getting to know my wonderful clients and sharing a truly intimate experience with them. I share a little bit of my soul with each and every one of them and love the feeling of truly pleasing someone.

 

I made the conscious choice to become an MA, something I had wanted to experience for awhile before I took the leap into the world of Adult Entertainment. Maybe it was a life calling, or just a deep need to provide pleasure. Either way I am enjoying myself and I feel truly blessed to have found such a warm and welcoming place to share a part of myself. Thank you all!

 

Kisses to you all

XoXoXo

[macmoron 120]

It can be both a hobby or art form to many people but to me and so many other people it can be also a way of satisfying one's physical needs and lust.

It is a natural desire of human being to have sexual pleasure.

[Guest S**a*Q]

I just like sex, people and money. I'm too klutzy to be considered artsy, even in bed, but it's more than just a hobby to me. I worked for corporate for far too long, becoming jaded and angry at the world. This job allows me to meet great people, work my own hours and have orgasms.

[LeeRichards 177238]

I just like sex, people and money. I'm too klutzy to be considered artsy, even in bed, but it's more than just a hobby to me. I worked for corporate for far too long, becoming jaded and angry at the world.

 

Hey....just insert "spend" in front of money and that's me !

 

I quit corporate, I run my own show now, make very good money and found a most enjoyable way to spend :)

 

I used the word hobby for lack of a better term but it is really not to me. It is also not a "lifestyle" either. It is just a part of my everyday life. It makes me a much happier person, I have developed some very nice connections, friendships spent time with some wonderful ladies and along the lines some great sex !! Cheers to sex everyone !!! :chug:

 

It's pretty cool when both the guys and gals "look forward" to seeing each other. I think.

[piano8950 32577]

It's fun. And I clearly remember after the first time I saw an MA, I felt my feet were bouncing of the pavement. I finally understood the term "Spring to my step".

 

Basically, it's like exercise for my mind. It leaves me feeling refreshed, energized, and a little bit happier. So I guess I could say, it's like an interactive spa session. With less clothes, more kissing, and some other stuff.

[PatrickGC 10792]

 

As many would agree, the terms hobby and hobbyist are unsuited as a moniker to this way of life, for reasons that I won't go into detail. They imply a non-serious, whimsical mindset, which at least to those who (as repeaters) over time have formed long-term bonds, seems like a devaluation of the comfort and well-being they have been able to find within our like-minded, accepting community. To them, the primary gratification derives from having meaningful, supportive and sustaining relationships, and only secondarily in the purely physical aspects. In practitioners who have perfected the skills of seduction and who genuinely love what they do, I consider this a true art form worthy of lofty esteem.

 

We operate in a part of the real world where the stereotypes fall away and the warmth, companionship, admiration and respect we share with each other resembles little of what the rest of the world believes this industry to be about. Tongue-in-cheek I will add, "Leave them in their ignorance."

 

I hope I'm excused for the very brief and furtive dart off topic.

FR

 

Futileresistenz:

 

You are not off-topic at all. Rather, your comments highlight the humanity which is present between people involved in these relationships in spite of the mainstream perceptions. That says a tremendous amount about the beautiful artisans and their clients. Indeed it does go way beyond the accepted definition of "hobby" and the like terms which, I agree ultimately do a disservice to people.

 

Perhaps the mainstream has a lot to learn from sex workers and their clients because what is being said here is that there is great humanity, fun, and in the same time [hopefully] makes money. These terms are not mutually exclusive despite what the mainstream would have the world believe. This works because people refuse to be constrained by labels. Front and center though it is our acknowledgment of how human and important erotic connection is. The very word "erotic" encompasses so much of the human experience; unlike other terms it is inclusive of variation.-apologies if I'm rambling here. The thoughts are coming fast and furious. Hopefully however it is making some sense-

 

This discussion really does blow the stereotypes out of the water! Putting front and center people's humanity and how much fun and important it is.

 

PatrickGC

 

Additional Comments:

It's fun. And I clearly remember after the first time I saw an MA, I felt my feet were bouncing of the pavement. I finally understood the term "Spring to my step".

 

Basically, it's like exercise for my mind. It leaves me feeling refreshed, energized, and a little bit happier. So I guess I could say, it's like an interactive spa session. With less clothes, more kissing, and some other stuff.

 

Piano8950:

 

"An interactive spa session." What a marvelous description!

 

One worker I was seeing what did the other end of town meaning that I had to travel across the Berard Street Bridge in Vancouver where I live. Crossing the bridge on my electric scooter on a chilly afternoon, I arrived quite cold. However, after the spa session, which obviously worked also on my mind, I traveled back across the bridge feeling absolutely toasty warm. It could it snowed and I don't think that would have noticed. Yes indeed there was this spring in my step. :)

 

PatrickGC

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

Inserting your comments below Patrick. I think you have hit on one of the most fundamental principles of sex work (for me anyway). That is that sex is intricately important to us as humans that if it is not "fulfilling" it throws the rest of our lives into imbalance. We are sexual and sensual beings and we need to be touched and to touch in order to be healthy and blissful. There have been so many studies on touch and sex for that matter but when it comes down to people recognizing the importance for some reason there is a disconnect. I've seen people in relationships falter because their needs are different yet their egos keep them fearful or getting those needs met. They end up unhappy and yearning for something.

 

Whatever sex work is, it is positive for everyone involved if they are in it for the right reasons. I believe in people were more open and honest abut their sexual needs and their need for touch, the world would be a much more stable place then where it is today.

 

<<<Perhaps the mainstream has a lot to learn from sex workers and their clients because what is being said here is that there is great humanity, fun, and in the same time [hopefully] makes money. These terms are not mutually exclusive despite what the mainstream would have the world believe. This works because people refuse to be constrained by labels. Front and center though it is our acknowledgment of how human and important erotic connection is. The very word "erotic" encompasses so much of the human experience; unlike other terms it is inclusive of variation.-apologies if I'm rambling here. The thoughts are coming fast and furious. Hopefully however it is making some sense-

 

This discussion really does blow the stereotypes out of the water! Putting front and center people's humanity and how much fun and important it is>>>