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Food for thoughts... an open letter.

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It has happened a few times to me as well so you're not alone and I hope it doesn't keep happening as it will cause me to rethink seeing a SP.

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I must admit, I haven't really had a problem with this. Almost all the ladies I've met have been thoroughly reliable - very rare to get a cancellation, and if it happens they've let me know in advance. There have been a couple of exceptions, but not very many at all.

 

Areez, I have to ask: multiple times from the same person? I admire your tolerance. I can't say I'd have the patience to get as far as making a third attempt, and quite possibly not even a second if someone no-showed on me without notice...

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Areez, I have to ask: multiple times from the same person? I admire your tolerance. I can't say I'd have the patience to get as far as making a third attempt, and quite possibly not even a second if someone no-showed on me without notice...

 

Twice from the same provider yes. Its not as bad as no showed. Cause one no showed would be a strike out sorry... that's just rude.

You know what they say though - fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. There wont be fooling around the third time :b I think I have better things to do (not wanting to sound rude here)

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Guest N***he**Ont**y

I have been lucky so far about cancelations but I do have a list now who I will not see after the arrangement made was changed without mutual agreement.

Edited by N***he**Ont**y

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Is the cancellation after the final confirmations? I like to confirm one hour prior as the final confirmation, so that if anything came up last min, that is the time to cancel. You never know when someone can slip in the shower, or dogs decides to run the neighborhood, lol

So after the confirmation is made, and the person doesn't arrive, then that is very disappointing:( On either side of the fence.

 

I have heard a story recently of a Gent who canceled a session, properly, and got chewed out for it, this is also not fair. At least he called to cancel and didn't just no show. I have had to cancel at times myself, but will do so when the confirmation is due, or earlier if possible. This is only respect for each other's valuable time.

 

xoxoxo

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Is the cancellation after the final confirmations? I like to confirm one hour prior as the final confirmation' date=' so that if anything came up last min, that is the time to cancel. You never know when someone can slip in the shower, or dogs decides to run the neighborhood, lol

So after the confirmation is made, and the person doesn't arrive, then that is very disappointing:( On either side of the fence.

 

I have heard a story recently of a Gent who canceled a session, properly, and got chewed out for it, this is also not fair. At least he called to cancel and didn't just no show. I have had to cancel at times myself, but will do so when the confirmation is due, or earlier if possible. This is only respect for each other's valuable time.

 

xoxoxo[/quote']

 

 

Hello Miss Sophia,

I am fully understand that last minute emergency stuff does happen and I have nothing against that. Life happens lol ...

This was confirmed in the morning, as usual if I pre-book ahead, I confirm appointments ahead in the morning -- if I waited an hour before an appt. I wont make it on time cause of the time it took to get a reply, and the drive I have to make from the west end to downtown :b (I'll be late! and no one likes the one that shows up late *winK!*)

There is a whole set of details which I will skip and not divulge that leads me to this rant its just sometimes upsetting and I just want this thread as a reminder that like you mentioned -- as a hobbyist more often than not we get chewed out for it...

--xx Areez.

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Hello Miss Sophia,

I am fully understand that last minute emergency stuff does happen and I have nothing against that. Life happens lol ...

 

This was confirmed in the morning, as usual if I pre-book ahead, I confirm appointments ahead in the morning -- if I waited an hour before an appt. I wont make it on time cause of the time it took to get a reply, and the drive I have to make from the west end to downtown :b (I'll be late! and no one likes the one that shows up late *winK!*)

 

There is a whole set of details which I will skip and not divulge that leads me to this rant its just sometimes upsetting and I just want this thread as a reminder that like you mentioned -- as a hobbyist more often than not we get chewed out for it...

 

--xx Areez.

 

Yes I sometimes for get what it is like to be in a large city, hahahah, 10 min anywhere in Fredericton, LOL....

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Areez,

 

This does happen from time to time. I understand your frustraton.

 

It hasn't happened to me in a long time. I remember once having a regular provider in Winnipeg. We saw each other every couple of weeks, and then suddenly cancellations started. There was no reason for it. Our relationship was always friendly and professional. As it turned out, there were a lot of things going on in her life, things that made keeping appointments difficult. At the same time, as a regular, I was definitely feeling taken for granted. As if there was an assumption that I could be cancelled on because I would rebook. We'd been seeing each other for well over a year at that point in time.

 

You really have a couple of options. The first is simply to move on. The second is to open a dialogue. I would only suggest this if it is a regular. Simply contact her and say you haven't appreciated the repeated cancellations, but you are somewhat concerned a) that you might have done something to upset her or make her feel uncomfortable or b) that there she might be having problems in her life. Without needing details, you could simply indicate that you would still like to see her, and ask her to contact you when she was better able to keep appointments and see you.

 

If the lady's not a regular though, I'd just move on.

 

Porthos

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This all boils down to respect on BOTH sides. Everyone's time is valuable and worth something. Yes, sometimes things happens: sickness, accidents, people getting in the way but this can be handled respectfully, with notice and an apology. If it becomes recurrent, there is loss of respect and each party must decide if they are willing to accept that.

 

I have felt bad every time I have needed to cancel and have offered something to make up for it later. If I can't offer the best of me, I respect someone enough to cancel. If there are things going on that can't be handled or I'm personally not doing a good job at balancing, then I need to respect myself and others by not scheduling appointments. If that becomes an issue, the onus is on me to fix the problem(s).

 

Being upset by this is completely legitimate and it sucks when it happens. If it's something that can't be helped, chalk it up to life. If it ends up being more a respect issue (or lack thereof) then whoever is in the non respected issue needs to respect themselves and move on. There is also something to be said for communication. If you feel comfortable with the other ASK what's happening. Maybe it's something that can be overcome.

 

We're all just people.

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Guest C**Tra****er

I've only ever had a cancel with a SP once. One of my dogs ran away and the SP was very understanding and even offered to help in the search. I was willing to compensate her for her lost time but she declined.

 

I've had an SP in Ottawa not show up for a scheduled appt. We corresponded for over a month and confirmed an hour before the appt. She never showed and never offered an explanation. She was very well recommended as well.

 

If I'm running late, I have no expectation that my time begins when I arrive. However if the SP is running late, I do have the expectation that time begins when she arrives. I understand that life happens and I accept that, but communication is key and respect is a two-way street.

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