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Phaedrus last won the day on June 30 2018

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About Phaedrus

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    Frumious Bandersnatch

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    Welcome, random visitor! Thanks for dropping by.

    I'm just an average guy, like most of the others here, probably. But I've discovered that I can have lots of fun with lots of very hot people, so... um... that's what I'm doing here. But I guess you're the same, unless you're one of the hot people I might end up having fun with.

    A quick request to the other gentlemen here: please don't ask me whether a particular MA offers extras. I usually don't know, because I've never asked. If you're looking for mileage beyond the usual MA experience, why not go see one of our awesome SPs? That's what I do :)
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    Frumious Bandersnatch

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  1. This is one of those topics where there are no definitive right answers. I think asking how much fantasy vs reality a provider should give clients is about as useful as asking what body type she should have. A lot of us want different things and not everyone actually wants what they say they want. You see this a lot on Twitter. There are providers that sell the fantasy, and then get accused of being fake. There are providers who give a more honest, warts-and-all view of their lives, and get accused of ruining the fantasy. There are people who strike a balance, and I'm sure they get told they're doing it wrong, too. You can't win. As far as I'm concerned, everyone needs to decide for themselves how much of what they present in this world is a carefully cultivated persona, and how much is real. But we all need to accept the decisions that other people make, and not slam people for over-sharing, or making their problems public, or "being fake", or whatever. It's OK to sell the fantasy. And it's OK to ask for help when you're down and hurting, or to ask for compassion and understanding if you've been through some bad shit in the past. But it's not OK to insist that everyone conform to your preferences, or to be an asshole when they don't.
  2. Might be worth kicking off an Instagram account/follow thread, similar to the Twitter one we already have... although I have no idea how many folks are there.
  3. You mean the sex workers, or the politicians? :) Agree with the consensus - it's unlikely the next administration will do much with sex work. There will certainly be no legislation in the short term given the probability of a Republican majority in the Senate, and even if that didn't exist I suspect they'd want to spend their political capital elsewhere. The only thing that might happen is that Federal LE might be told to deprioritize the moral panic a bit, but since most of the enforcement is at state level in any case I don't know how much difference that will make in real terms.
  4. I remember that! It was awesome :) It's a real shame all that stuff is on hold these days... it would have been great to see everyone! Up her back? Yup. Right. We believe you :)
  5. In some places this is already happening. OIC in Ottawa sounds similar to what you describe, if not entirely the same. I think there's a Montreal collective as well, but I don't know much about that.
  6. I'd totally be in, if my wallet could handle it! If you want some of mine, you're always more than welcome...
  7. True. I suspect most providers that do this are genuine and just trying to keep control of what's said about them and where... but we have to take it on trust that what they post is genuine. That's a judgement call for the potential client. I think that if you're honestly trying to help the provider, you're better off giving your constructive criticism to them directly. "Praise in public, criticize in private" is a pretty good rule to live by here. If you care about them, I can't see how trashing them in public is helpful. Of course, you have to be aware that they may not need or want your opinions, and may be more or less blunt in letting you know that if it's the case. I don't think anyone's talking about that here. Genuine scams are an entirely different matter and I don't know of anyone who opposes exposing the people doing it. Sometimes when a client has a bad encounter, it's their own fault because they didn't respect limits, or tried to push for freebies, or just jerked the provider around. There are some clients out there who are running scams of their own, aimed especially at new providers, where they threaten to post bad reviews unless the provider gives them the discount/services/whatever they want. There are some people who are just assholes. And then, of course, there's the genuinely deserved bad reviews. The problem for the reader is trying to figure out which one of these applies when you're reading a negative review. If anyone figures it out, please let the rest of us know! See above. Providers are not under any obligation to entertain anyone else's opinions, no matter how self-important the owner of that opinion may feel. Sometimes the best option is to just shut up and let it go.
  8. Best thing to do with stuff like this is to use the "report post" link - that will flag it for the mods and they can move it to the right place. Remember, that link isn't just for problematic posts... you can use it for anything that might need a mod's attention.
  9. Thanks, Kitten! This is a really important subject to talk about, so I'm grateful that you have done so.
  10. I'm pretty sure she isn't :) I can't imagine why she'd be on any Canadian boards, to be honest... so if that's an issue then so be it.
  11. Slightly off-topic, but Mistress Matisse would be a brilliant person to get for the interview series you're doing. She's very active as an activist and advocate for sex work.
  12. Another thing: most reputable escorts won't return calls or texts that came in any significant time ago, because of discretion; they have no idea if the person who called/texted is still in a situation where they can talk, or whether it might result in disaster. So they'll play it safe. If you have no such issues and someone can call/text you anytime, then say so in your message.
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