Things that turn you off when you see an SP?

[Cleo Catra 178382]

Sometimes you must remind people (in general not only in this biz) what is lacking in their service. How else will they realize what is wrong? I will never hesitate to tell my local bar owner that the environment is being neglected, what is different here? If you found something offensive when visiting an SP, a polite email detailing your dislikes would be appropriate. If she is a good soul she will take it in stride and endeavour to change what is not acceptable. If not confronted, she may continue on thinking nothing is wrong. We learn only thru our mistakes but we do not always realize we are making a mistake unless told PERSONALLY!

 

I completely agree with this.

 

Even if you found her on cerb, that doesn't mean the 'no negative' has to supercede everything. If something is wrong, tell her - just be polite.

 

I understand completley that telling any lady, no matter how politely, that she had body odour/her house was a mess/she was rude, is not going to be fun. However, this IS the only way she may change these behaviours.

 

And honestly, I personally think that every lady was probably well aware of these issues already, so a gentle, polite reminder may have kick-started her to finally do something about it. My bathroom at home is never that clean (my incall is spotless though!), because I was just lazy about it. A friend coming down the stairs and saying EW was all it took for me to get my butt up there and start scrubbing.

[Guest gagagaga]

I am instantly turned off if there are other people around (some guy in another room, even another sp)

 

I also don't like it if the bed looks unmade or the washroom is messy.

 

The worst is if there are chalk marks of dead bodies on the floor or crime scene tape...I really hate that.

[Guest E*******h S******s]

I never said I will reveal her identity. I'll keep it to myself.

As I said, I'm a nice guy. :)

Posted via Mobile Device

 

But that is contradictory to what you are complaining about. You want to see negative reviews of SPs but how useful would they be if she isn't named? Or should the negativity be kept back channel through pms? Again, far more hurtful than saying something to the SP herself and then not going through with the appointment. You say that you don't want to hurt somebody that may not know how to run a business. Isn't it then just vindictive to trash her to other potential clients? If you are the "nice guy" that you claim to be, wouldn't it be nicer, as Meg stated, to tell HER what your issues are rather than talking behind her back?

 

Just sayin'...

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

The worst is if there are chalk marks of dead bodies on the floor or crime scene tape...I really hate that.

 

Yah...thanks for the levity...that would certainly be a mood breaker unless you are a diehard CSI fan! LMAO

[Guest gagagaga]

I didn't really want to join that conversation, but I was thinking...

 

maybe he is just too shy or uncomfortable to tell her. Not everyone is as strong as self-confident you may be. Also, while your point is well-taken, it is not his duty to give her pointers, advice, or criticism. However, if he chosses to express his opinion privately to friends/members, I think he has that right.

 

ps...does anyone get turned off by chalk marks and police tape?? turned on maybe??

[roamingguy 300291]

Yah...thanks for the levity...that would certainly be a mood breaker unless you are a diehard CSI fan! LMAO

 

Or maybe a necrophiliac

RG

[Guest gagagaga]

I said "chalk marks OF dead bodies"...not OR dead bodies...lol

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

I didn't really want to join that conversation, but I was thinking...

 

maybe he is just too shy or uncomfortable to tell her. Not everyone is as strong as self-confident you may be. Also, while your point is well-taken, it is not his duty to give her pointers, advice, or criticism. However, if he chosses to express his opinion privately to friends/members, I think he has that right.

 

ps...does anyone get turned off by chalk marks and police tape?? turned on maybe??

 

I think it is hypocritical to state your disapointment publicly and not one on one. He never needs to see her again so what is he losing by sending her a personal note? she may sit back and wonder why he never contacts her again. I would prefer to hear negative comments from the source. I will and can get over a negative email but reading a veiled complaint on a public board would really bother me. If I did something you did not like, email me!!!!!!

Yes, police tape could be a turn on in the right circumstances LOL

[Guest E*******h S******s]

I didn't really want to join that conversation, but I was thinking...

 

maybe he is just too shy or uncomfortable to tell her. Not everyone is as strong as self-confident you may be. Also, while your point is well-taken, it is not his duty to give her pointers, advice, or criticism. However, if he chosses to express his opinion privately to friends/members, I think he has that right.

 

ps...does anyone get turned off by chalk marks and police tape?? turned on maybe??

 

When I'm not happy with a particular service, I make a complaint to the person or persons that can rectify the situation. I don't feel I have the right to trash the provider of that service unless and until they refuse to make things right. Everybody makes mistakes. But I guess that's just me...

 

Chalk marks and police tape? Mmmmm.....not s'much....lol.

[Hornet 71]

Sometimes you must remind people (in general not only in this biz) what is lacking in their service. How else will they realize what is wrong? I will never hesitate to tell my local bar owner that the environment is being neglected, what is different here? If you found something offensive when visiting an SP, a polite email detailing your dislikes would be appropriate. If she is a good soul she will take it in stride and endeavour to change what is not acceptable. If not confronted, she may continue on thinking nothing is wrong. We learn only thru our mistakes but we do not always realize we are making a mistake unless told PERSONALLY!

 

Love your professionalism Meg, and wish more SPs are like you.

 

But, there is a high risk involved here for the clients. If the lady in question runs a "bad" business like the one described, most likely she doesn't really care what the client thinks about her business.

This means that she will probably be offended by my suggestions/comments.

This might motivate her to do some nasty things. :) And as you know in this type of business discretion is an important thing. :)

 

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

[roamingguy 300291]

I think it is hypocritical to state your disapointment publicly and not one on one. He never needs to see her again so what is he losing by sending her a personal note? she may sit back and wonder why he never contacts her again. I would prefer to hear negative comments from the source. I will and can get over it but reading a veiled complaint on a public board would really bother me. If I did something you did not like, email me!!!!!!

Yes, police tape could be a turn on in the right circumstances LOL

 

Kinda goes to one of my points buried in my previous post. And I'll articulate it I hope, better now. It's easier to be critical when you have the anonymity of a handle on a board to post behind, than saying either face to face or through e-mail your complaint

RG

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Love your professionalism Meg, and wish more SPs are like you.

 

But, there is a high risk involved here for the clients. If the lady in question runs a "bad" business like the one described, most likely she doesn't really care what the client thinks about her business.

This means that she will probably be offended by my suggestions/comments.

This might motivate her to do some nasty things. :) And as you know in this type of business discretion is an important thing. :)

 

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

 

I guess I am naive then. I believe in certain fundamental behaviours and find it unbeleivable that others don't. Guess "my bad"

[Guest E*******h S******s]

Kinda goes to one of my points buried in my previous post. And I'll articulate it I hope, better now. It's easier to be critical when you have the anonymity of a handle on a board to post behind, than saying either face to face or through e-mail your complaint

RG

 

Testify.:icon_cool:

[Hornet 71]

But that is contradictory to what you are complaining about. You want to see negative reviews of SPs but how useful would they be if she isn't named? Or should the negativity be kept back channel through pms? Again, far more hurtful than saying something to the SP herself and then not going through with the appointment. You say that you don't want to hurt somebody that may not know how to run a business. Isn't it then just vindictive to trash her to other potential clients? If you are the "nice guy" that you claim to be, wouldn't it be nicer, as Meg stated, to tell HER what your issues are rather than talking behind her back?

 

Just sayin'...

 

The comment about the negative comments was in a different context. If the board allowed posting negative comments, I would be glad to share my experience with others.

But as per the board policy, this is not the place for that so I don't have a choice but to keep it to myself.

You have to follow the rules :)

Posted via Mobile Device

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

The comment about the negative comments was in a different context. If the board allowed posting negative comments, I would be glad to share my experience with others.

But as per the board policy, this is not the place for that so I don't have a choice but to keep it to myself.

You have to follow the rules :)

Posted via Mobile Device

 

Exactly...your bad for not seeking out a reputable (including location) gal! Sorry hun but that's how I see it.

[Hornet 71]

I guess I am naive then. I believe in certain fundamental behaviours and find it unbeleivable that others don't. Guess "my bad"

 

Definatelly you are not naive, but highly professional.

I just don't want to deal with potential negative consequences if she doesn't take constuctive criticism well. :)

The last thing I want to happen is that a sexy lady approaches me somewhere when having dinner with friends and asks when I'll stop by for another "session". :)

I would rather avoid that kind fo risk .. :)

Posted via Mobile Device

[Guest E*******h S******s]

The comment about the negative comments was in a different context. If the board allowed posting negative comments, I would be glad to share my experience with others.

But as per the board policy, this is not the place for that so I don't have a choice but to keep it to myself.

You have to follow the rules :)

Posted via Mobile Device

 

Ok, just so I'm clear: (If this Board allowed) You would be glad to share your experience with others thereby hurting an SP's business, but you won't walk away from what is indicative of a bad appointment or tell the SP that you are unhappy with something because it might hurt her feelings? And that is being "a nice guy"?

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Definatelly you are not naive, but highly professional.

I just don't want to deal with potential negative consequences if she doesn't take constuctive criticism well. :)

The last thing I want to happen is that a sexy lady approaches me somewhere when having dinner with friends and asks when I'll stop by for another "session". :)

I would rather avoid that kind fo risk .. :)

Posted via Mobile Device

 

And what would she ever gain by doing this? I think perhaps your perception of SP's is slighty skewed!

[Cleo Catra 178382]

I just don't want to deal with potential negative consequences if she doesn't take constuctive criticism well. :)

Posted via Mobile Device

 

Well I can see where you're coming from, I think you're making a lot of assumptions. Just because a lady did some bad things, does NOT mean overall that she runs her business badly, or that she's going to freak out if you give her constructive criticism. As I believe Meg suggested, you can send her an email, if you'd rather not do it in person.

 

There are many reasons the lady may have done these things, and yes, including the possibility that she genuinely doesn't give a fuck about her business. But if everyone simply decided to tell their friends, or post negative things about her on a board, rather than tell her, a woman who may have genuinely been clueless about the things she was doing wrong could be put out of business.

 

A good friend of mine will never, ever complain in a restaurant. Ever. She'll eat the food she was incorrectly brought and then leave, never to return. And she'll bitch about it to other people. The first thing they say - why didn't you TELL THEM. The services we provide are in no way comparable to a restaurant, obviously, however, in any customer service situation, there are certain things that both the customer and the service provider are responsible for. And the reaction you receive could surprise you - in your case, she might have laughed and said 'whatever', in which case, you'd be right - she doesn't care about her business. But, she may have realized what she'd done wrong, apologized, and fixed it.

 

One thing I've learned in life is: you're NEVER right about people. Everyone can surprise you.

[Megan'sTouch 23875]

But I understand, many of SPs are the actual sponsors of this forum, so they make the rules :)

Mods make the rules, along with Town Council. Town Council is split 50/50 hobbiest/SP's. Mod does not buy the "I'm upset about this site policy so change it or I'll pull my ad/$$$ from the site" bullshit.

[Hornet 71]

Ok, just so I'm clear: (If this Board allowed) You would be glad to share your experience with others thereby hurting an SP's business, but you won't walk away from what is indicative of a bad appointment or tell the SP that you are unhappy with something because it might hurt her feelings? And that is being "a nice guy"?

 

If the board allowed negative feedback, she would probably got used to it and not take it personally as it would be part of the process.

Also from my experience, some people don't know how to react when criticized by others in person. They would rather read it, and digest it before decided to be offended or not. :)

 

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

[Guest E*******h S******s]

If the board allowed negative feedback, she would probably got used to it and not take it personally as it would be part of the process.

Also from my experience, some people don't know how to react when criticized by others in person. They would rather read it, and digest it before decided to be offended or not. :)

 

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

 

You have glossed over my main point. Why is it necessary to humiliate in public rather than be honest in private. If you send it in a private message she can still "read it, and digest it before deciding to be offended or not".:smile:

[Cleo Catra 178382]

Also from my experience, some people don't know how to react when criticized by others in person. They would rather read it, and digest it before decided to be offended or not. :)

 

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

 

I would like to say that I'm the complete opposite. If I did something that someone was upset about, I would SO much rather have them tell me, so I could try and fix the situation with them, and so I can work on it. If I logged in and found a review saying my place was a mess, I would probably end up in tears. It would hurt me, and I would be staring at my screen wondering 'why couldn't he have said something'.

 

Obviously not everyone feels the same, as you point out ladies in your experience were opposite. But I point out my feelings on it to demonstrate that, just because it was one way with one lady, doesn't mean everyone is going to feel the same way.

 

I think reading the reviews and evaluating the lady can assist in this. I would assume that, if a gentleman from cerb came to see me, or Meg for instance, and they'd read our posts and reviews, I would hope that, if something questionable came up, he would know that he could tell us, rather than walk away thinking 'WOW and she was so well-reviewed this shocked me' or whatever. Because if someone said to me 'Hey Cleo, I had a great time, but I have to tell you - you should clean your bathroom more. I didn't really feel comfortable taking a shower in that tub' - I would not freak out, instead, I'd appreciate it and probably thank the gentleman in a very nice way for telling me.

[Hornet 71]

You have glossed over my main point. Why is it necessary to humiliate in public rather than be honest in private. If you send it in a private message she can still "read it, and digest it before deciding to be offended or not".:smile:

 

"Humiliate" !? :) Would never do that, whether in person or through an email. That sounds too personal. :)

What I wanted to say is that if the lady was advertising on a forum where negative feedbacks are common, she would be mentaly ready to take some critiziam as part of a process.

 

If I approach her directly, not knowing that others had a chance to express their disliking, there is a chance that she might not be "ready" and take it too personally.

 

But, I might be wrong. Some people might have other oppinions/experiences, which I respect.

 

Cheers,

H.

Posted via Mobile Device

[Tiffany Amber 7031]

I take the starting of this thread as just another one where the guy wants to be negative about the lady in question, but not say anything to her privately. What do you gain from this? Some kind of personal satisfaction? Do you feel like "you wasted your money" so now its some kind of payback?

And I'd also like to add, Don't assume things of people, especially Sp's! You said you dont know how she would react, maybe walk up to you in public and say something. We do not do things like that, nor would we reveal your private info unless you are a danger or threat to other Sp's, nor are we phyco bitches that have nothing better to do with our time than to try and ruin your name or livelihood. We are normal human being with feelings, emotions, a brain and families of our own!

It actually make me very angry when someone says stuff about Sp's and what we are cappable of in a negative manner. There has already been threads about this, so I am not going to say much on this topic, but really dont judge US because of what we do for a living.

If you dont feel comfortable with sending the Sp in question an email, then why do you feel comfortable with writing a public thread about it?? That just does not make any sense to me. No point in sugar coating it!!