cat 262460 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 I am a negotiator, no if, ands or buts. I grew up in the automotive industry and everything and anything was haggled. The one thing I learned from watching my parents eek out a living was that service costs were never argued but bartered. The $ value exchanged was always the hourly rate charged. If my dad needed legal advice, he serviced the lawyers cars until the bill was squared. I learned to negotiate for tangibles. I will argue price the Bay, you would be amazed at how often a discount comes into play in places no one expects. I never negotiate with what someone thinks their knowledge or skill is worth. What I do miss here in Canada is bartering. What does someone have that I need? I have bartered my talents for cars, furniture, jewelery, groceries, clothing, appliances, car repairs, vet services, legal services, spa and salon services, electronics, hotel accommodations, dental work, movers and house renos. The only thing I have failed at is finding a great plastic surgeon who was willing to work a trade. When it comes to negotiating the key is that both parties feel that they got their value out of the deal. I am not offended when someone asks me if I need something other than cash. It's in the approach. What do I need? What do you have? You don't ask an SP to discount her rate without putting something in the kitty to bring the value up to acceptable donation rates plus a bit more to make it worth her while. Common sense is all it takes... Cat P.S. I am currently in the market for a really nice, full size newer stacking washer and dryer! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 Take a few very deep breaths baby girl, it happens to all of us. Negotiating in Canada seems to be almost non-existent in any other business, but for some reason it happens almost daily to SPs. Being an avid negotiator, it doesn't offend me because I love to get a deal, and I understand its just in some of us, like a tree will behave like a tree, and rock will always behave just a rock should. Do not let it throw your game because it sounds like your a VIP player... cat I believe Cat summed it up - it can be annoying for sure, but I try not to let it get to me when it happens because after all, we have no control over other people. Occupational hazard, I suppose I find more of that with guys calling from CL - goes with the territory I suppose. I heard an SP retort one time to someone by saying, "do I go to your restaurant and offer you $10 for the steak dinner you're advertising for $20.... As much as I am tempted to use sarcasm like that, I usually just politely say no and leave it at that. Even putting "no discounts" or "no bargaining" in your ads doesn't always work. A lot of would-be clients can't read obviously (or ignore it). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 When it comes to negotiating the key is that both parties feel that they got their value out of the deal. I am not offended when someone asks me if I need something other than cash. It's in the approach. What do I need? What do you have? You don't ask an SP to discount her rate without putting something in the kitty to bring the value up to acceptable donation rates plus a bit more to make it worth her while. Common sense is all it takes... Cat P.S. I am currently in the market for a really nice, full size newer stacking washer and dryer! Unfortunately though Cat, that is usually not the case. They don't bring anything to the table. I got offered $60 and some booze the other day, but I was not in the market for that. I have always said I would trade a good used car for ongoing services but I know some gentlemen who have been burned doing that, so perhaps my expectations are a little high. I remember this one from last summer during the heat wave in Vancouver. "Will "fuck" for an a/c." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
antlerman 17064 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 I am a negotiator, no if, ands or buts. I grew up in the automotive industry and everything and anything was haggled. The one thing I learned from watching my parents eek out a living was that service costs were never argued but bartered. The $ value exchanged was always the hourly rate charged. If my dad needed legal advice, he serviced the lawyers cars until the bill was squared. I learned to negotiate for tangibles. I will argue price the Bay, you would be amazed at how often a discount comes into play in places no one expects. I never negotiate with what someone thinks their knowledge or skill is worth. What I do miss here in Canada is bartering. What does someone have that I need? I have bartered my talents for cars, furniture, jewelery, groceries, clothing, appliances, car repairs, vet services, legal services, spa and salon services, electronics, hotel accommodations, dental work, movers and house renos. The only thing I have failed at is finding a great plastic surgeon who was willing to work a trade. When it comes to negotiating the key is that both parties feel that they got their value out of the deal. I am not offended when someone asks me if I need something other than cash. It's in the approach. What do I need? What do you have? You don't ask an SP to discount her rate without putting something in the kitty to bring the value up to acceptable donation rates plus a bit more to make it worth her while. Common sense is all it takes... Cat P.S. I am currently in the market for a really nice, full size newer stacking washer and dryer! Cat...again well put. There was a great "Dr.Phil" episode the other day all about bartering....discounts....and such. Women should be more agressive.....make deals.....do not be affraid to do so. It is proven that women can get more deals and better ones then men in most cases...by using thier attributes and their God given talent of the extra sense they have.........reading people. North America...USA and Canada are far behind the times when it comes to negotiations and bartering for products and services...... Lord knows how many deals on cars...furniture....and other things I have gotten by dealing.....the trick like you said is to know what peole want and need and what you can bring to the table. Prime example for me....I never go alone to buy a car. I have posted in the web looking for people to buy a car with me.....yes....approach a dealer and a salesman telling him you want 2 cars.......thier eyes look like bambi in the headlights.......go to dealershiops that you know they are on volume commission...not price commission.......works like a charm. Same idea goes for many services..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andee 220524 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 "but $100 is all I have!!" (if u only have $100 to you name, should u be hiring an escort?.....hm/quote] Or he should be calling those SPs who advertise in that price range as opposed to someone like you Annessa, who's minimum is an hour's call anyways..... But even with $100, they will still try to bargain down to $80.00, so you can't win. Or "since I only want 15 minutes, can I give you 50 bucks". I don't know if it's because of ads (like the ones I've seen on CL for $60 and $80) or there are just more ignorant guys out there, but I personally have noticed I am getting more requests for discounts in the past couple of years than I did in "the old days". Also, I hate it when they use the argument, "but the going rate is...." That's worth a thread on its own. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 I'm just of the opinion that if you are in the market for something, that you just work until you can afford it. Same from the client side, don't ask for a discount or to exchange something you have. Just let me earn what you charge, I will pay you for it, then you will have the $$ for an appt. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cat 262460 Report post Posted November 17, 2009 I'm just of the opinion that if you are in the market for something, that you just work until you can afford it. Same from the client side, don't ask for a discount or to exchange something you have. Just let me earn what you charge, I will pay you for it, then you will have the $$ for an appt. This philosophy is ideal and as an SP I appreciate not being hustled. But there are always the occasional unusual set of circumstances where things can be worked out. A successful negotiation always has both parties walking away happy. It's the ones that simply want a discount with nothing in return that girls get frustrated with. Cat Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
