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Nathalie L

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Posts posted by Nathalie L

  1. Posted

    Trish Ferguson is a very good, discrete, and kind police officer who truly cares about sex workers and does the best she can with the tools she has. She is a good person to reach out to if there are any problems...

     

    ..but yes, hopefully no one needs to call her.

     

    Thank you for posting this Em!

    Nat xox

    • Like 8

  4. Posted

    I'm going to stay away from all the other points you've brought up because I have absolutely zero knowledge on it.

     

    But on this point, a mandatory minimum seems improbable. I guess my biggest question, among many, many questions is who gets to decide what the minimum is?

     

    I think a more important question is: how would the mandatory minimum be enforced? It's a scary thought.

     

    I do echo Kathryn's concerns, as well.

    • Like 7

  5. Posted

    Good morning ladies and gentlemen of CERB,

     

    Megan and I are both full-time students approaching the end of term. We recently took a bath together thinking we would relax and do some pleasure reading, but experienced a different kind of pleasure instead... hehe

     

    DSC_9146Retouch-e1397650616942.jpg

     

    We offer private massage duos and private lapdance sessions for discerning ladies and gentlemen.

     

    For more information about us, our rates, and our services, please visit our websites at http://www.lovely-nathalie.com and http://www.meganstouch.ca

     

    Fondly,

    Nat xox

     

    DSC_8336Retouch-e1397650989208.jpg

    • Like 3

  6. Posted

    Nathalie, I respect a great deal of your posts and opinions.

     

    In fact though, a great deal of negative judgments and generalizations have been made in this thread...judgments such as "cheap" as well as generalizations that if the extra $$ cannot be afforded, maybe he/she should rethink spending priorities...

     

    Again I question: what gives any of us the right to judge anyone in this lifestyle?

     

    Point taken. I myself used the term 'mortified' in my post. However, that wasn't based on my own judgment of people necessarily, but rather, my own discomfort at having to discuss finances explicitly with clients when we are face-to-face.

     

    I have no right to judge anyone. Conversely, many clients do try to get 'deals', or cheaper appointments if they are having financial difficulties. Unfortunately, I can't take responsibility if one of my clients can't afford to see me... It's hard not to get judgmental in this industry when I think of someone asking for change. As others have said, I do think it's the responsibility of the client him or herself to insure they have the appropriate amount. It has never happened to me (thank goodness) and I'm sure I would handle the situation gracefully. But I would be lying if I said it wouldn't throw me off.

     

    I'm just being completely honest here.

    Nat xox

     

    Additional Comments:

    Totally agree re: the labels! I need to park my judgment!

    • Like 6

  7. Posted

    What if that person has a physical disability and really doesn't have lots of disposable income... and yes paid companionship is a Luxury... but also sexuality, and intimacy can be a necessity... So Is this person not allowed to be able to enjoy once in a while some paid companionship? Because he doesn't have as much disposable income as others... that can afford to meet a lady on a weekly basis or even more often... just for fun... And unlike this other gentlemen this person. With the disability has a harder time to find companionship on the "more Conventional" ways....

    And I am giving this scenario because I have a gentlemen that visits me, and he has told me how other ladies have taken advantage of his situation... what I absolutely find really sad and Low...

    So my question is: Are only those with high disposable income allowed to partake of this life style?

     

    Of course they do. It is definitely a case-by-case basis. I also have clients with disabilities (both visible and invisible) and their disposable income is limited. Some of my clients save for upwards of a year to be able to afford to come and see me. Never has one of these clients asked for change, or come unprepared for our meeting. In fact, there is quite a lot of preparation that goes into these encounters (both on my part, and on the part of my client).

     

    I have avoided this thread because so many responses have almost sickened me.

     

    Kudos PV for being the one to stand up for those who may have a real need to receive their change. I can completely understand every point of view made but, I cannot understand nor condone a generalization that anyone who needs his change is "cheap".

     

    Cerb has proudly labelled itself as a non-judgemental community. We do not judge each other's sexual preferences, kinks, desires or fantasies. How can any of us therefore judge a persons financial situation against his/her sexual needs.

     

    I am, sadly, disappointed with the judgements and generalizations being made in this thread.

     

    I'm sorry you feel a lot of the generalizations in this thread are judgmental and unkind. I can definitely see how that could come across but I don't agree that the judgments are necessarily negative. Feeling uncomfortable in these situations is a very real feeling, and we all have knee-jerk reactions to the intersections of intimacy and money which may or may not be rational. Of course, if I knew one of my clients was in dire financial situations I would not judge him or her for asking for their $10. I would, however, take offense to someone who was not in dire financial need who did the same.

     

    These are all case-by-case situations, of course, and the OPs initial question was, after all, asking for a general idea of what peoples reactions would be (not specifics).

     

    I think Porthos' post gets at the core of the issue quite well, and so I won't repeat it.

    • Like 7

  8. Posted

    I would be slightly mortified if someone asked me for change for a multitude of reasons. Not because it's wrong per se, but mainly because 1) I probably wouldn't have any change to offer 2) it brings finances to the forefront of the encounter which isn't desirable and 3) it would be awkward.

     

    I have to admit that I would judge someone who asked. It would seem cheap.

     

    I also agree that it's the responsibility of the gentlemen (or woman, or couple) in question to have the appropriate amount...

     

    Cool thoughts for a Sunday morning. It's really unfortunate how professionalizing the experience makes it less desirable somehow. I wonder what the world would look like if we could ask for change like this and NOT have it be awkward or somehow 'cheap'. Again, it's the whole intersection of money and intimacy that makes all of this complicated, eh?

    • Like 8

  9. Posted

    I think it's up to everyone to set their own rates. It's a personal decision, and one based on a lot of factors that we might not necessarily know about.

     

    "Do 'they' even know the cost of living in Canada?" I'm assuming you're talking about recent immigrants of migrant laborers? I'm sure they do know the cost of living here, but need to make a certain amount of money to make ends meet. I have no idea, we aren't walking in their shoes after all... Ultimately we can't judge. We don't know anything about their lives or what determined their rates, etc. I don't think it has anything to do with self-respect or fairplay either... it's just people trying to make a living in ways they see fit. These things have a tendency of working themselves out.

     

    I'm really sorry it's making life difficult for you, Eve. I think that the really good clients, clients who are respectful and kind, will continue to see the ladies they want, regardless of the cost. I don't think it will drive your prices down at all. People are always transitioning in and out of the industry... Those that stick around (like you) and have good reputations (like you) will be successful in the long run.

     

    We need to hold our judgment and be in solidarity with one another. It's a tough industry!

     

    Just my two cents,

    Nat xox

    • Like 43

  10. Posted · Edited by N*t****e L*f*****

    Curious about different types of sex toys, accessories (lubes, massage lotions, etc), safer-sex supplies, and other products related to the sex industry? I know I am ;) POWER (the local sex-workers human rights organization) is hosting a sex toy party in collaboration with Venus Envy Ottawa. Check out their website here: http://venusenvy.ca/Ottawa

     

    It is a private party for current and former workers of all genders, all sexual orientations, and for every sector of the industry (massage, dancers, cam workers, etc) with a staff member from Venus Envy who will teach us the ropes (no pun intended) when it comes to sex toys (anal toys, vibrators, dildos, lube, and harnesses, etc).

     

    The location is private, please private message me for details.

     

    If everyone could bring some food that would be great! BYOB as well :)

     

    FYI: Venus Envy offers 10% off sex toys for self-identified sex workers!

     

    Sorry gentlemen ;) This event is for workers only, but I promise that it will benefit you all greatly hehe

    • Like 4

  11. Posted

    I think the "I don't want to know..." sentiment is completely legitimate. To open up a conversation about what you are doing, and why, could potentially result in a conversation your significant other is simply not ready to have yet. Ignorance is blissful, to a certain extent, and sometimes the status quo is preferable to change. For a lot of clients in the industry, there are financial dynamics between their significant others' and themselves, children, a property or multiple properties... I'm sure I don't need to tell you how complicated all of that is. Even if there's a glimmer of suspicion, I can totally see why someone would decide not to address it until they are ready (or they have to because it's overt).

     

    I guess the thing I like the least, to be honest, is when someone is 'almost caught' and/or 'caught' but feels like they've dodged a bullet and then proceeds to tell me about it. As a service provider and as a woman, I don't actually want to know when some of the clients I've met have dodged their own bullets, or the reasons they give their SOs to come and see me. There are some things about the lives of my clients that I simply don't want to know. I think that's valid. I have great (and I mean great) respect for clients who speak to me of their significant others with respect, and with a nuanced understanding of lives and how complicated they can be. The double life is a difficult one to lead, but I don't necessarily want to be privy to all of the details...

     

    I'm really sorry Someguy, but I don't want to hear about the moments where people have almost been caught, or been caught, and what their significant others think of that. It feels really personal and could (potentially) be disrespectful too, no?

    • Like 6

  14. Posted · Edited by N*t****e L*f*****

    ...so I was laying in savasna (corpse pose) at the end of my yoga class this evening and was thinking about orgasms. The teacher ended the class with a quote from Ghandi. Something along the lines of "we try to make other people happy in the ways that we want them to be happy. We are too attached to our own ways that sometimes, it's hard to be respectful of peoples processes" (I've paraphrased the quote).

     

    I was laying and thinking about how elusive an orgasm can be at times. Sometimes I think people are too attached to getting people off the way they want to get them off, rather than helping them along their own process, or supporting them throughout their own process. Do we stop and think "how can I support this person?" "what does she/he need to get off?" "does that conflict with what I want to get them off?"

     

    I think we get really attached to particular images and fantasies. Legs here, body parts there, contortions right, left (no your other left), and center... but is that really ideal? Is that what they want, or what we want?

     

    I'm thinking a lot more people would have powerful orgasms if they were supported along their process. I have to admit that I've probably gotten wrapped up in this too, but I want to be more mindful from this point forward.

     

    Now Ghandi was abstinent (much later in his life)....but hopefully he won't mind the inspiration ;)

     

    Food for thought.

    Nat xox

    • Like 14

  17. Posted

    Wow. This is incredible. I'm teary-eyed looking at how many people have signed this letter in opposition to the criminalization of third parties, and clients, as well as in support of the decriminalization of sex work in Canada.

     

    Here's a link to the open letter: http://www.gshi.cfenet.ubc.ca/openletter#.UzRswF7BHw8

     

    My jaw dropped. Over 300 people have signed it!

     

    I'm sending a personal thank you letter to those I've come across throughout my own academic career who are supporting this.

     

    My heart feels very warm...

    Nat xoxo

    • Like 11

  19. Posted

    There will be a current and former sex-worker only social from 7:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. on Wednesday April 2nd. It is open to sex-workers from any sector of the industry including erotic massage, escorts, cam workers, erotic dancers, people who offer BDSM services, phone workers, agency workers, and independents, etc. It is also open to any person of any gender and sexual orientation.

     

    There will be vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free snacks available. Please feel free to drop by for 15 minutes and then leave, or stay for the entirety of the two hours.

     

    Please PM me for the location (same location as usual). Again, this is for workers only (current and former).

     

    Thanks,

    Nat xox

    • Like 3

  20. Posted

    I understand this must be rather frustrating for you. When we have an intimate connection with someone, and spend a couple or a few hours intertwined with someone both physically and emotionally, it's hard to not have expectations or desire something more. (More is vague, but I think everyone knows what I mean).

     

    It's true that everyone is busy, but people (in general) are usually selective about who they are friends with. This happens both in the industry, and outside of it. I'm certain you don't talk to every friend on your Facebook, just the ones you really care about, right? I'm not suggesting these SPs don't care about you, but I can only imagine how frustrating it gets to receive these sorts of PMs, texts, and e-mails continuously from every client, when most of those clients never book an appointment with them again. We all learn from experience, and there are a lot of people in this industry who will see a girl once and then never see her again, but expect texts, e-mails, and friendly PMs. I don't think that's a fair expectation to have.

     

    Once you've established a regular connection with an SP or MA, that's a different story, but when you've only seen someone once? That's a bit more complicated to navigate, and will definitely be dependent on how busy the worker is (both personally and professionally).

     

    I know it sucks, but that's the way it is =(

     

    You're definitely not the only one that feels that way, but we all learn with experience.

     

    I really hope you find what you're looking for,

    Nat xox

    • Like 29

  21. Posted

    I really love taking selfies. I blame my iPhone and Twitter for that. ;)

     

    I think professional photoshoots are really important, but I don't think having non-professional photos on CERB or on your website is indicative of how you spend the money you make in this industry (i.e. on drugs). That's a bit ridiculous, right? I guess I can't assume to know what clients think, but I would hope they would have a more nuanced understanding of this industry than that would suggest.

     

    When I first started on CERB all of my photos were selfies. I coasted along that way for over a year. I didn't even have a website! I was a full-time undergraduate student working as an escort on the side and was using the money to pay off student debt. How people decide to invest their money is their own concern, and not ours to judge.

     

    I'm not going to lie though, I'm addicted to professional photoshoots now. I love working with different photographers and I really enjoy tweaking and updating my website. I have a 'selfies' album on CERB but not on my website... I think it adds a lot and gives a glimpse into your life (the selfies that is) :)

    • Like 3

  23. Posted

    Good morning everyone,

     

    I simply wanted to take a moment to apologize for not being able to participate on the board as much as I have in the past. I miss it, but really need to focus on writing my thesis over the next couple of months. I defend my thesis in August, which means I have to finish writing it by June. I'm feeling the pressure!

     

    I can't wait to finish my master's degree. It will be such a relief! Then I'll take a year off to contemplate whether I move on the PhD or seek another type of employment (we shall see). Anyway, suffice it to say, I'm a master procrastinator (procrasturbator) ;)

     

    I've even read books about why people procrastinate. Le sigh.

     

    I'm still posting in the advertising section, I just don't have time to participate on the board as much =(

     

    I'll be back though, for sure, and I still read stuff when I can

    Nat xoxox

    • Like 21

  25. Posted

    There will be a sex-worker only social from 7:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. on Wednesday March 5th. It is open to sex-workers from any sector of the industry including erotic massage, escorts, cam workers, erotic dancers, people who offer BDSM services, phone workers, agency workers, and independents, etc. It is also open to any person of any gender and sexual orientation.

     

    There will be vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free snacks available. Please feel free to drop by for 15 minutes and then leave, or stay for the entirety of the two hours.

     

    Please PM me for the location (same location as usual). Again, this is for workers only.

     

    Thanks,

    Nat xox

    • Like 1
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