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Nathalie L

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Posts posted by Nathalie L

  3. Posted

    I try to be compassionate with myself as much as possible. While regret is useful, as articulated by Porthos, it does not serve a purpose beyond learning about oneself. If ever I experience a twinge of regret, I try to remind myself that in that moment (the moment over there, forgotten, lapsed, or otherwise inaccessible), I made the best possibile decision for myself. Perhaps now I'm different, or somehow wiser (possible older?), but that doesn't mean that back then my decision wasn't right for me.

     

    With age comes that recognition. I made a lot of really stupid mistakes, even within the past few years, but I've learned incredibly valuable lessons from them. I try not to be too hard on myself :)

     

    This was a wonderful thread, thank you so much Al!

    • Like 7

  4. Posted

    I agree with Cristy, and with everyone else who has posted in this thread. While I support Canadians traveling to Switzerland to access the services of Dignitas, it means that only those who can afford the travel expenses can die with peace, and dignity. That makes my heart ache, because there are a lot of people in Canada who simply can't afford those kinds of services, but desperately want them.

     

    I think it should be decriminalized.

     

    Here's a news article from the 26th about the debate: http://canadaam.ctvnews.ca/assisted-suicide-debate-reignited-with-death-of-canadian-in-switzerland-1.1254921

    • Like 2

  7. Posted

    I just submitted my two term papers. OMFG what a relief! Sigh, oh happy thoughts and blissful relaxation. That's definitely the highlight of my day and it's only 9:30 a.m.!

     

    Additional Comments:

    Oh yes... the viva puffs and whippets... those are the highlight of my day too! That box got me through the evening as I poured my heart and soul into those papers ;) (not!)

    • Like 3

  9. Posted

    This thread hits close to my heart. Thank you, Karina, for being so forthcoming and honest about your feelings. It has created a safe environment for people to post about their own experiences. Hopefully we can all learn from one another, and move forward with compassion, kindness, and love for ourselves.

     

    Perhaps this isn't the appropriate place or time to discuss my experiences, but this story might illuminate the complexities of loving people, regardless of whether the relationship is bounded by the particular circumstances of the SP/client relationship. I hope this helps, Karina, and I hope others who are reading are compassionate and understanding.

     

    In May 2011, a client and I fell in love. Was it wrong? Definitely not. Was it complicated? Very.

     

    We had so much in common and he inspired me. He encouraged me to apply to law school, write poetry, start a blog, and share my thoughts with the world. At one point he bought me a beautiful leather bound journal and said

     

    Beautiful Nathalie,

     

    Thank you so deeply for your friendship, which is renewing my sense of what is wonderful in life. A wonderful gift to give anyone.

     

    This journal is in appreciation for all the kind, helpful reading you have done on my novel. For your beautiful thoughts - yet another place for them.

     

    With love,

     

    I inspired him as well. We wrote e-mails to each other endlessly, and saw each other approximately every two weeks. He was writing a novel, and I was reading it and providing him feedback on it. The novel's love story turned out to be representative of the love he and I shared. As he learned more about my life, he would integrate those moments into the narrative. It was beautiful to see our love story unfold both on paper, via e-mail, and in real life.

     

    The problem: he was single but contemplating getting back together with his ex and I was in a relationship with a woman I married several months later.

     

    While on a trip to Chicago, he and I decided to part ways. After a morning of blissful relaxation, lovemaking, kissing, and caressing, we went out for lunch. I looked at him and said I felt very confused and conflicted. I told him I loved him, but that it was complicated. I asked him what we were doing, and whether we wanted to move forward with a 'relationship'. With hindsight, I recognize that we were already in a relationship, simply a relationship of a different nature. Neither of us had satisfying answers. My relationship with this client was bounded by the financial exchange, but I knew I would lose my relationship with my partner if I continued to see him.

     

    We walked to Millenium Park and sat on a bench, and watched people walk by. We held hands, and we both cried and mourned the end of our relationship. While he and I were negotiating my departure from Chicago (and the relationship) we had doubts. He said "even how we have discussed this, with so much love, compassion, and understanding, makes me wonder whether we are making a mistake Nathalie"

     

    I shook my head, I wasn't sure. I went home to my partner, told her what happened, and that was the beginning of the end of my relationship with her. We separated in the summer of 2012.

     

    At the time, I made the decision that made sense for me. I have no regrets. However, Karina, I would ask that you not romanticize relationships that aren't bounded by a financial exchange. Money does not necessarily corrupt authentic love and intimacy, rather, it's our discomfort with the idea of mixing both that causes tension. I think it's important to keep in mind that most relationships have unnegotiated financial dynamics (for example, many marriages and long-term relationships) which can cause much more tension than the honest and open communication that's possible with clients in this industry.

     

    If it feels right to you, then tell him, whilst simultaneously keeping in mind all the questions, comments, and concerns raised by Samantha Evans as well as others. None of us are walking in your shoes (or his). Wanting to keep love, intimacy, and care in one world, and money in another is what most people do, but we should all have a better understanding of what really happens in this industry... it is so much more complicated than that, isn't it?

    • Like 33

  11. Posted · Edited by N*t****e L*f*****

    I love porn. Absolutely love it.

     

    That's why I thought I would share this awesome event happening Toronto. For all of those located in or around Toronto (or for those willing to travel) an opportunity to brush elbows with the stars of these hot, dripping, and sexy films shouldn't be missed!

     

    The Eigth Annual Good For Her Feminist Porn Awards are from April 4th-6th this year. The nominees this year are available here.

     

    i-heart-fem-porn-logo-small.jpg

     

    Information about the event is available here.

     

    There's also a day of workshops on Saturday during the day for those more academically inclined!

     

    Enjoy,

    Nat

    • Like 2

  12. Posted

    When I'm with a woman I prefer to take my time and really learn what she likes. I play the 'optometrist' game (is one better, or is two better? one, or two?) There are many different kinds and intensities of orgasms. Even women who are multi-orgasmic have some orgasms that are 'better' than others depending on a multitude of factors... I like taking my time in that sense...

     

    I would never think that a woman was faking it in my presence, because I hope that I create a safe enough space for them to be honest with me if what I'm doing isn't working for them! If someone fakes their orgasm I'm assuming it's because their partner is putting too much pressure on them to get off.

     

    If I knew they were faking their orgasm, I would try to have a conversation about it and reassure them that I wouldn't get offended if they didn't orgasm. My self-esteem isn't that sensitive. It would just be a learning opportunity...

     

    To answer the question simply, I wouldn't assume she was faking it because she was multi-orgasmic. However, I wouldn't assume that there wasn't something I could do to make her orgasms better. There's always something you can do to make it more intense!

    • Like 4

  15. Posted

    I guess my only practical advice is: time. And to not stop trying with new people. And try not to let the shadow of your old experiences get in the way of appreciating the new ones while they're happening.

     

    I couldn't have said it better myself.

     

    It's really beautiful that you were able to connect with someone like that, regardless of whether it happened in the context of sex work or not. It's great that you're supportive of what she wants and I'm certain that in her own way she appreciates the times you've spent together.

     

    When I (semi)retired in October 2011, I wasn't sure whether I would come back and I definitely mourned some of the relationships I had maintained while working as an escort. It was definitely hard and the decision to take a break wasn't easy. It was amazing to come back and reconnect with both new and old lovers.

     

    As IrishWhiskey mentioned, perhaps she will be back!

    • Like 4

  16. Posted

    Yes, absolutely. It's got nothing to to with the point of the story.

     

    I suppose her rates may well be in the public domain, but I have to wonder why she decided to share her monthly budget with a journalist. Obviously it's her life and she can do what she likes with it, but... it seems odd.

     

    My thoughts exactly. It's definitely bizarre... Her rates are public domain, but how many appointments she books per month as well as her expenses definitely aren't. Oh well... c'est la vie. I can't say I'm entirely surprised The Sun wanted to know.

  17. Posted

    On another note, not sure the reason behind the Toronto Sun's need to post all the Rates and Income. To me, these are highly unnecessary.

     

    I completely agree, but it's the Toronto Sun and highly sensationalized. Her income demonstrates that she makes a lot more than the average Canadian which might shock a lot of people. The fact that she's saving up for a condo and paying off school simply reinforces how 'intelligent' she is. Had she been using that money to support her children they might have wondered whether she was really doing it by choice...

     

    Next thing they'll run a story of whether escorts pay their taxes... tis' that time of year after all --sigh--

     

    On another note, I'm happy the situation worked out for her.

    • Like 1

  19. Posted

    The Current CBC Radio One

    In search of equal opportunities in sexual expression: Sex & Disability

     

    Anan Maria interviews Dave Symington, Kirsty Liddiard, Cory Silverberg in this amazing segment on sex work and disability.

     

    We started this segment with a scene from the Oscar-nominated movie The Sessions. It's based on the true story of Mark O'Brien, a man confined to an iron lung who seeks the help of a sexual surrogate to help him lose his virginity at the age of 38. The movie addresses challenges many people with disabilities face when it comes to sexual expression.

     

    In Vancouver, a disability rights group called EASE is tackling those same challenges head-on. EASE stands for Equitable and Accessible Sexual Expression. The group is in the initial stages of putting together a partnership with an escort agency which has a roster of sex workers trained to work with people with disabilities.

     

    Freelance producer Pamela Post was invited to sit in on a meeting of EASE. And she spoke with a couple of its members about why this project is important to them. We aired a clip. ---- And we should warn you, there's going to be some frank talk about sex coming up -- nothing graphic though. ----

     

    Dave Symington is a disability rights activist and the co-founder of the group Equitable and Accessible Sexual Expression.

     

    Kirsty Liddiard is a post-doctoral fellow at the School of Disability Studies at Ryerson University.

     

    And Cory Silverberg is a sex educator and the co-author of The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability.

     

    This segment was produced by The Current's Josh Bloch.

     

    If there's anything you'd like to tell us about what you hear on the program, we'd love to hear it. Call us at 1-877-287-7366. Follow us on Twitter, where we are @thecurrentcbc. Find us on Facebook. Or email us through our website. And while you're there, download the podcast and check out all the links and background information about what you're hearing here.

    • Like 4

  22. Posted

    I haven't learned anything yet today. However, I woke up this morning and realized that if I opened my eyes, I would learn a lot of valuable things from my day of laziness yesterday.

     

    Here's the story... I went out with a friend on Saturday night and had a fantastic time. We went out for dinner, saw a show at the NAC, went out for a few drinks... Eventually, our adventure led us to Bare Fax, a strip-club in the market of Ottawa, where dances were purchased and kisses were had by all. We stayed till close.

     

    When we arrived at my place, we had a 'living room dance party' listening to Queen, Supertramp, and The Beatles. We also listened to a little bit of Blink 182, Offspring, and Our Lady Peace (say what?). Weird, I know, but so (oh so) perfect.

     

    Suffice it to say, we went to bed at 6am.

     

    I spent most of the day sleeping and watching Nikita yesterday. I saw the e-mails pile up, the homework sitting on my desk, I saw my calendar and all the things I need to get done this week and thought "oh well, I'll do it tomorrow". Well, I woke up today and realized it's all manageable, and that one night of epic adventures and fun provided me with something my homework can't: happiness. I also learned that when I don't do my work, it's not the end of the world!

     

    Like I said, I'll just do it today.

    • Like 2

  23. Posted

    Good morning. My name is Nathalie Lefebvre and I'm happy to announce that Megan and I have been naughty during reading week... We are offering private lapdancing & sensual massage duos.

     

    We're on vacation and would love to spend time with each other and you! Please review our websites for further details: http://http://www.meganstouch.ca and http://http://www.lovely-nathalie.com.

     

    MN10.jpgMN3.jpgMN4.jpg

     

    Click here to see our first recommendation!

     

    We are looking forward to meeting you,

    Megan & Nathalie

    • Like 1
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