bargain hunting...

[Guest st*****ens**ors]

...why???

 

I am continually amazed by posters who look for reassurance about ads featuring "deals."

 

You have access to a forum that reviews reputable, well established providers. Why not consider them first?

 

The thought of being complicit in someone's exploitation should horrify you as much as it does me. The very real risks and correlates of rock-bottom pricing should deeply concern you, for your own sake as well as that of the person you see.

 

I wouldn't want to spend time with a provider unless I truly believed she was happy, healthy, and doing exactly as she wished. I would rather never see another provider than be complicit in causing harm.

 

Obviously one cannot always be sure, regardless of what an ad may say. But surely rock-bottom pricing should be a warning!

 

My 2 cents, mixed with a bit of incredulity.

[Emma Alexandra 123366]

To bad more men weren't like you. It would put a big dent in the exploitation of underage and pimped out girls. We should only be in this business because we want to be.

[Helena D'Orville 33237]

Thank you for saying this Stillopensdoors. Unfortunately, a lot of people are only interested in paying "the less they can". And they are indeed very happy when they find a "bargain", and also very proud to publish about this to tell others. That is a spiral down. It tells a lot about their view on women, and about their view on escorting as a profession.

[Guest *Ste***cque**]

Great post!

 

That is my worst fear, that I would participate in the exploitation of another person who was forced into this lifestyle. To reduce those odds I typically used to see someone over 25 and someone who, in their posting/communication, seems to enjoy this business... most of the time. We all have bad days. I also chose escorts who charge a higher rate for their time just to reassure myself that I was not taking advantage of them.

 

Low ballers, by their nature, seem to not give a shit about the escorts circumstances. No offence but c'mon!

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Everyone has the right to seek out what they can afford however they must bear in mind what this could possible mean. Also, it is entirely unacceptable to request a lwwr price than advertised! As one poster mentioned there are a lot of well reviewed women here on lyla so why the many threads about xyz on abc for only $$$$. It's been said many times bit this ain't the dollar store. This is not a necessity. If you can't afford it date the palm sisters and stop perpetuating the real!!!!problem of women being used!

[mrgreen760 37785]

Some folks shop at Old Navy/quantity over quality.......others don't. Room for all types I figure.

 

Peace

MG

[Guest st*****ens**ors]

Thank you for your response, Mr Green. I should have been more specific in my original post. I wasn't referring to price variation between ads, but to posts inquiring after ads referring to $40 and $50 specials, car service, 24-7 availability, "barely 19" and so forth.

 

There are red flags that should alert people to the possibility of duress, or some extremity that suggests danger for anyone involved.

 

Of course different providers have different business models for a variety of reasons that are entirely at their discretion, and which may appeal to different clients. That's just fine.

 

But there are also ads that should make you concerned. I see regular inquiries after precisely those ads, and it baffles me.

[Meaghan McLeod 179664]

I'm going to weigh in on here. This is an issue close to my heart.

 

The reality is, this is not an industry issue. This is a Society issue. It seems that everywhere we turn, this is the issue of Consent. Some feel that drugging, or putting someone in a state of intoxication, and they can get away with it, it's ok. We've seen the headlines - Society is outraged - the courts are weighing in. Justice is not being fulfilled. Victims are being raped - both men and women. However, there is a rape culture that exists, and the victim is always blamed

That is my bottom line.

 

So, to get back to this industry. There are those that willingly will provide a service at a price that is lower then the standard. That in reality is their choice. If they are comfortable with this - Kuidos to them. They are happy, doing what they want. More power to them.

 

However, there are those that are providing something that they do not want to do. They feel pressured, they need to do whatever to make ends meet. Maybe they have a handler who is telling them they need to make $. dollars. Maybe they need to do something in order to pay their rent/food/smokes/drugs/bills-whatever it is. They have a dollar amount they need to make in order to survive. So they do whatever it takes to make this goal. This is subsistence living. This is what the media portrays it to be.

 

We as a community need to draw a line in the sand and say no, I will not participate in this...

 

However, there are so many that feel "they are somehow not the client that contributes to this". They somehow feel that "it can't hurt to ask", or "I'll see if she can give me something more then she advertises, for less then the general rates others quote". They think "I've scored - I need to tell my buddies". How many times have we as a Community seen someone post "I want to see an RMT that provides extras", or, "Hey, does Sally do more then..."

 

I can't tell you the number of times I've had someone ask "I see Mary does x for $100, can you do this for $50?". Or, what can I get for $40, or even $20. Or, "I have $200, can I see you for 8 hours?", or "I don't like to use protection, so how much is it?"

 

I couldn't care less - the reality is, I don't need the money, I'm doing fine without seeing someone.

 

However, I grieve for some of my friends outside of this particular community. They work on the fringes, and do not have the luxury of working in a stable environment. They are feeling the pressure - they have bills to pay, mouths to feed. Yes, even drug dealers or handlers to pay. So the dredges of humanity keep them in the trenches. They know they can get away with this. They know they can get a rock bottom price for something that is truly special.

 

However, I always am amazed when they then complain (on other boards of course), "her place was dirty, she smelled, she was disgusting, her boyfriend threatened me, she robbed me, she was a robot...she sucked". What do these people think? That somehow it would be a magical experience? The reality is - when someone asks for something that most value highly - and then decide that they want to undervalue it - it will never be a magical experience and will most likely be a horrifying experience.

 

So, as a community, we need to draw a line in the sand. We've already decided that negotiating is never acceptable. If the provider is outside of the rate someone is comfortable with - move on. Don't complain - just move on. If you are looking for something who is willing to reduce their rates for you, - realize, you are probably supporting someone who is doing this for the wrong reasons.

 

At the end of the day - is this what you want???

 

Help stop the whole rape culture - because this is my personal opinion. Those that choose to ask for more - or bargain for more - are part of the whole rape crisis that women are facing today.

 

 

Yes - whores can be raped. It hurts just as much.

[Guest st*****ens**ors]

Thank you, Meaghan. You've articulated my concern far more eloquently than I ever could.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Everyone has the right to seek out what they can afford however they must bear in mind what this could possible mean. Also' date=' it is entirely unacceptable to request a lwwr price than advertised! As one poster mentioned there are a lot of well reviewed women here on lyla so why the many threads about xyz on abc for only $$$$. It's been said many times bit this ain't the dollar store. This is not a necessity. If you can't afford it date the palm sisters and stop perpetuating the real!!!!problem of women being used![/quote']

 

My sentiments exactly! I have noticed a growing trend that the services ladies offer seem to be viewed as a necessity rather than a want or a need. No one is going to die if they don't see a service provider.

 

This is a luxury service, not going to the store to buy bread or milk and that's how the business has been downgraded such as getting the most for less in the quickest amount of time. The time that we take to offer such a service has often been diminished by those who want rock bargain prices.

 

An SP would have to have a revolving door scenario in effect and risk discretion among other things to make a decent living doing this yet forced to take higher risks because of seeing that many more people. I personally prefer to see gentlemen based on quality not quantity. Money is not worth my health or safety and I reiterate that to all my clients.

 

As Meg said, everyone has their own financial budget and constraints, yet this burden seems to be put upon the provider by those who try to negotiate or ask for "deals". A person's financial situation is none of my business and anyone who tries to put this on me is sent to my blocked folder just like the waste of timers or WOTS for short.

 

Having someone text attempting to pull on my heart strings about being in a "hard place" is not going to have any sympathy from me especially after I met them the first time.They have already read my website that "Rates are FIRM", have paid my rates initially yet STILL have to ask this! One of these things that is covered in my fees is discretion instead of a sketchy situation.

 

That is never going to happen and I don't feel guilty for anyone else's financial situation. These type of people REALLY bother me and also claimed that I charged X amount for a massage which was $40 LESS than what I charge for a half hour massage!! Some people...but then I just say no and move on which is much less stressful.

[Guest S****r]

Thank you for your response, Mr Green. I should have been more specific in my original post. I wasn't referring to price variation between ads, but to posts inquiring after ads referring to $40 and $50 specials, car service, 24-7 availability, "barely 19" and so forth.

 

There are red flags that should alert people to the possibility of duress, or some extremity that suggests danger for anyone involved.

 

<snip>

 

But there are also ads that should make you concerned. I see regular inquiries after precisely those ads, and it baffles me.

 

perhaps this was one of them today: http://ottawacitizen.com/news/local-news/gatineau-police-send-sex-worker-17-back-to-family

[fortunateone 156618]

i think the main thing isn't what is the rate being charged, as much as it is just pay the rate any sp is asking, rather than trying to haggle it down. Yes some sps charge 100/hr, while others have a $1000/2hr minimum, regardless of which one contacted, clients should never think that rate is an opening bid for negotiation.

 

especially since so many of the hagglers have no idea what a negotiation is. It means both sides give something up. In the sp case, she is expected to give up a portion of her fee. In the client case, he expects to get all the time and services included in her requested rate? not how a proper compromise works.

 

If you are a negotiator, remember, you need to compromise the difference between what she offers for that rate, what you wanted to pay, along with what you are going to give up in exchange for the reduced rate.

 

otherwise all you are is cheap

 

. .

 

 

Regardless of who you see, if you enjoy their company, and your budget allows for it, tip them well, and keep going back. You know their rate is below others, and that they could or should be charging more, and you know that you can afford more, so why not? you might be that guy who has them thinking, well maybe i should be charging an extra 20, why not?

[Amanda-Lee 11094]

I would like to talk about the MA side of things for myself, my own experience with "bargain" questions.

 

As an MA who works at a SPA, I follow the rate of the Massage Fee which is NOT the fee you pay the MA. Massage fee and Gratuities are different things. Some walk in, I explain about the massage and the rates. I usually include the massage fee with my gratuities fees. Usually they're like, "WHAT THAT MUCH FOR A MASSAGE!!!???" So, I explain the massage fee, or I usually just say, door fee is X amount, in room fee is X amount.

 

Usually they still get all jumpy and run away.

 

However, a lot don't mind the massage fees at all or gratuities and are happy.

 

I have a base rate (lowest which is basic) and go up from there and depends on the duration they are wanting to stay, rate will change. Massage fees rarely change.

 

*Every SPA and MA has his/her own rates, don't haggle them, be respectful and talk to them if you are short.

 

As for SP and my experience: When I was doing a lot of SP work I ran into this. When I first started I never really had or ran into the issue. Later on, it was like a blooming blossom of BS. When I return back into the SP world, my rates are going up for varies reasons. It is frustrating because they put a reason to beat the "well this girl did that for X so why do I need to pay that for X? It's too much."

 

Simple response: I am not like everyone else. I am who I am. I do what I want to do.