Ask a Hobbyiest Thread

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

I had an idea to start this thread after reading a post by Cato....

When I read it I had a few questions go through my mind...and being a curious kitten I'm interested to know the answers to them.

 

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply!

[stevecurious 42059]

This reply may sound somewhat familiar to you Angel;) but I think anxiety and nerves go hand in hand with seeing a lady regardless if you have seen her before or not. I believe that when you respect someone both as a person and an SP, and yes there are those who find these titles to be mutually exclusive, then nerves will definetely come into play. Seeing someone as we do generates a lot of passion and sometimes feelings and I think if you see someone regularly then of course anxiety will develop out the respect you have for the other person. I have found that seeing a lady for the first time is a lot like having a first date, dealing with nerves, what to say/not to say, when to say it, etc. After a certain amount of time the dialogue looks after itself but the nerves, anxiety, or whatever name you choose to give it still lingers due in no small part to the respect and inevitable feelings that develop over time.

 

If I were to ever stop being nervous or anxious when I knocked on a ladies door then it would be time for me to stop seeing that lady, because at that moment I would have lost a connection with her and she would no longer be a person...only a means to a physical end! So I hope and pray that every time I approach a ladies door my heart is pounding, my mind is racing and my thoughts occupied by the words "stay calm, cool and collected you have done this before." If not then...well...time to find another hobby.

 

As far as wondering if the lady I am seeing is feeling the same way...well of course I wonder and of course I hope. But since I do realize that this is, for lack of a better term, a business I never hope too much. After all one should never mix business with pleasure.

 

So yes I get nervous. I still get anxious and I still get bothered when "chemistry" is not reached. Mostly I want to be a respectful, kind, caring and good date for all the ladies I meet and I am always concerned about coming up short...so yes I get nervous.

[Ilovegirls 588]

I will take a stab at this. I just replied in Cato's thread and this is a natural carry on from there.

 

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

- I will say no. The anticipation is different, it is more of an excitement than a worry. Any anxiety seems to disappear when she walks in and you have that first kiss. Ah, memories.

 

2. Does it get better or worse with time?

- Not quite sure about your thought was on this. Do you mean as you spend more time in the "hobby". If so I would say it is less in general but sometimes, if there has been a big lead up or problems actually getting the date setup there can be some worries, the hope that it is actually going to happen this time.

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

- First time is the worst. I have no nervousness with someone I have met a few times. Anticipation, yes.

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

- Good point. I had assumed, perhaps incorrectly, that she is the more experienced at this and her anixety or nevousness is directed at somewhat different concerns that the guy's. Is he a jerk? Am I safe? The show/no show concern goes both ways.

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

- Actually it would reduce mine and I would want to put her at ease more if she seemed nervous.

[namssa 562]

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

Not at all, in fact quite the opposite. Knowing that I will soon be visiting my SP, I am filled with anticipation. The closer the time gets, the more eager I become with desire to see her. I actually last quite a long time if I am seeing an SP I have seen previously and like a lot.

 

 

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent with the hobby?

 

I am a fairly different pooner now compared to about 3 years ago when I started this hobby. I research extensively, so the sessions are pretty much always good for me. In the beginning, I went to MP's and saw some lower end Indie girls, rarely seeing the same girl twice. Now I see mainly Indie girls and have not been to an MP in over a year. I have my favourite Indie girls that I see regularly and they are all spectacular GFE SP's: Heidi Heiss, Nikita, Rachelle Reigns, Ava Jones are among my favourites. Since I have begun seeing these ladies on a regular basis the sessions are great. So, the feeling is much better because I see better quality GFE SP's and I see them often, so I have a great rapport with each one.

 

 

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

Not at all. The more I see an SP and get to know her better, the more relaxed and intimate the sessions become.

 

 

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

The SP's that I see are pretty professional and know how to give a good GFE, so the feeling is of a "Girl Friend" for the duration of the experience. They are not nervous at all, in fact very relaxed and playful now that we know each other.

 

 

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

I make it a point to start building a rapport with an SP right from the first contact. I make it a point to ask questions and perhaps joke a bit with them in an attempt to put them at ease with me. If my SP was nervous, I would do what I could to have them relax, not an issue that I have noticed. The more an SP is comfortable with you, the better the session will likely be.

[Guest al****s]

Thanks for starting this thread Angel...it's great to see/learn what goes through the minds of the men who spend time with us. I appreciate knowing that it's not just me that's nervous!

 

alexis...xoxo

[Apex2006 1071]

I had an idea to start this thread after reading a post by Cato....

When I read it I had a few questions go through my mind...and being a curious kitten I'm interested to know the answers to them.

 

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

I would have to say no, the only thing that affects my performance is if I am not turned on byt the person I am with. I tend to finish quicker if I do not have any atraction to that persone.

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

Just need to try new things! That is the reason for doing this. I have always wanted specific things and I can find them here. I would have to say the felling is always awsome, but even better it you try something for the first time.

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

I don't ever feel nervouse! Unless it is a persone that is not from this site! or is recomended by one of the guys I know from this site.

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

Horny? Yes!

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

I don't like being around a woman that I make nervouse, but usualy after a few mins I can make the people around me feel safe and confortable.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply

 

 

Keep em comming

 

Apex

[drlove 37202]

Hmmm... Let's see:

 

1) I love the feeling of anticipation when meeting someone new... the racing heartbeat, rush of adrenaline etc.. I have to say I don't have performance anxiety, but I have noticed as I've gotten older that I've been able to last a bit longer with someone new.

 

2) I find that the novelty / intensity of hobbying lessens somewhat as time goes on. I've been a hobbyist for almost eleven years so I need to find new ways to keep things fresh and exciting. E.g. (fetishes, role play etc..)

 

3) I find I get a bit nervous when meeting someone for the first time due to the excitement. As time goes along, those feelings dissipate but the sex gets a whole lot better!

 

4) Yes.

 

5) I once had an encounter with a lady from a reputable agency in Toronto. I don't know if it was her first time as an escort or what, but I could tell she was very nervous. I tried my best to make her feel as comfortable as possible, but truth be told, her nervousness made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

[roamingguy 300292]

I had an idea to start this thread after reading a post by Cato....

When I read it I had a few questions go through my mind...and being a curious kitten I'm interested to know the answers to them.

 

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply!

 

1. I liken the anticipation/nervousness to going on a blind date. Except

you know the lady is attractive. But her personality/friendlines is

the unknown. Is she going to like you, are you going to like her,

will you two hit it off. But to me at least, that's part of the fun, the

excitement of meeting a new lady.

 

2. I wouldn't use the word worse. To me it's a natural normal

feeling. Part of the fun is excitement and nervousness.

If I don't feel excited, nervous or filled with anticipation, call the

Paramedics, I'm probably dead

 

3. Nervousness ends for me (I only have 1 lady thus far I've repeated

with) But my anticipation and excitement levels increased second

time. But whether a repeat or first time, the final hour, counting

down excitement/anticipation building

 

4. Don't really think about it. First time, knew she was only in it for

the money (she said so), third time, no chemistry, she probably wanted

the time to end as bad as I did. With the other ladies, they either

feel the same way, or similar, or they deserve the academy award for

best actress.

For the lady I repeated with, first time together, certain boundries

which she said. Second time, she did something, without me

asking, which was off limits the first time. And the second time

she asked me to do something to her which she said turns her on

It is (a secret btw) something which left her exposed and

vulnerable and only something she would be comfortable doing if

there was a trust level. Only say that because if she didn't feel

the same (similar) about me, she wouldn't have included those

activities the second time

 

5. I would find it sweet if she was had the same anticipation/nervousness. But it wouldn't change

anything, I'd still be filled with anticipation/nervousness whether she was cool and in control

or nervous too

 

RG

[Origin 268]

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

I never had a problem with that personally. However I can see it being a problem. Especially if there was a prior relationship, through pms, or forums and they know who you are. Furthermore, maybe if they are well reviewed and the person reads what prior clients have experienced (true or false) they may want to "be the man" and perform or have a similar or better experience therefore they may psych themselves out.

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

The feeling, of being in this hobby for me gets worse in general, because I am trying to leave the hobby. But is so darn tough because you ladies are so irrestible!! :)

I just do not want to be desensitized to women and look at them as objects for sexual pleasure only. That feeling gets worse.

 

But the sexual and personal expereince gets better, with time spent with a woman, an meeting new women and making friends,

Personally I have a much better time with repeating. It is more to me than just sex. I respect and try to build a relationship with the woman. I get the most of that.

 

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

Taking into account what I said above is the reason the nervousness does not continue when I repeat. It actually gets better and better because we are able to know each other better emotionally, personally and physically.

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

Yes. For sure. The woman experience is very important to me. I want her to feel good and enjoy it. I would not want her to be uncomfortable and hate being with me. I know it is about the money for her..but I still have a heart.

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

It I was nevous, it would make it easir for me because I could help her though it and vice versa. It makes her more personable in my eyes and that connection is what make it for me.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply!

 

No thank you! :)

[Mikeyboy 27113]

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

Honestly sometimes, yes. The nerves and anticipation are part of the rush I get from doing this. The way you (and your body) respond under these conditions is going to be different than that of being with someone you have know for a long time and are completely comfortable with.

 

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

I don't get as nervous as I did the first couple of times, but it still gets my heart pounding from time to time.

 

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

Not as much. Part of the nerves come from the unknown. If it is someone I am seeing again, there must have been enough chemistry with this person to develop a degree of comfort.

 

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

I'm ashamed to say no. I've always assumed that being the "experienced professional", that it was second nature to her. Before I found this site, I knew very little about the sp's experiences. Most of my hobbying consisted of agencies from the yellow pages while travelling. Not much of a chance to "get to know" the sp other than the small chit chat before and after. Cerb has given me a bit more insight into sp's and how they are...well real people with real opinions on many things, and yes even nerves from time to time. It is a much more intense experience when you get to know the sp a bit before hand.

 

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

Oddly, I think it would make it easier. We could spend some time putting each other at ease.

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

Thank you all for responding to my earlier questions! I have a couple more...but if they are repeat questions from somewhere else...I'm sorry :D

 

1. When going to an incall location, do you prefer Hotel chains or her apartment?

 

2. Upon entering the locale what are a few things that turn you on and off about it?

ie: the location itself, the appearance of the outside, the appearance of the inside, security buildings....ect

[Apex2006 1071]

Thank you all for responding to my earlier questions! I have a couple more...but if they are repeat questions from somewhere else...I'm sorry :D

 

1. When going to an incall location, do you prefer Hotel chains or her apartment?

 

2. Upon entering the locale what are a few things that turn you on and off about it?

ie: the location itself, the appearance of the outside, the appearance of the inside, security buildings....ect

 

 

Q-1. IMO if it is a woman from this site it makes no differance. But a new girl that has no reco's or referances, I think I would prefer an appartment.

 

Q-2. Always best if the location is appealing, also I like it when it looks like I have been the first person there. If I feel that I am the only one that has been there, I feel much better.

 

Just a tip,

 

I know that you have multiple encounters, but if you can convince your client that he is the only one you are going to see that day, it make them feel much better. That may just be me!

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

Q-1. IMO if it is a woman from this site it makes no differance. But a new girl that has no reco's or referances, I think I would prefer an appartment.

 

Q-2. Always best if the location is appealing, also I like it when it looks like I have been the first person there. If I feel that I am the only one that has been there, I feel much better.

 

Just a tip,

 

I know that you have multiple encounters, but if you can convince your client that he is the only one you are going to see that day, it make them feel much better. That may just be me!

 

 

 

In my experience, honesty is the best policy! I dont want to fool anyone, but I understand what you mean for sure! Every gent I see I make sure, to my very best ability, that he feels special, that he feels like he is the only guy on earth at that moment...and Im a sexually starved woman ready to ravage! But also that he knows I am grateful for the visit. Im sure that mostly every guy knows in the back of his mind that he is not the only one I would see that day (unless it is an extended visit), but yes, if thats a way to do that without lying. I hope you all leave me knowing no matter how many men are visiting that each and every one of you will always have a little spot in my heart. Very important to me are you all ;)

 

P.S. I would never come out and just say Yo! your totally not the only guy I'm seeing today >.<

Does that make sense?

[Apex2006 1071]

In my experience, honesty is the best policy! I dont want to fool anyone, but I understand what you mean for sure! Every gent I see I make sure, to my very best ability, that he feels special, that he feels like he is the only guy on earth at that moment...and Im a sexually starved woman ready to ravage! But also that he knows I am grateful for the visit. Im sure that mostly every guy knows in the back of his mind that he is not the only one I would see that day (unless it is an extended visit), but yes, if thats a way to do that without lying. I hope you all leave me knowing no matter how many men are visiting that each and every one of you will always have a little spot in my heart. Very important to me are you all ;)

 

P.S. I would never come out and just say Yo! your totally not the only guy I'm seeing today >.<

Does that make sense?

 

 

Totaly makes sense, and we know that we are not the only ones. But if I walk into a hotel room and the bed looks like it has been "used" I will not be a happy camper. Also I would perfer a fresh new sheet over the bed at leased.

 

That is why I would prefer an outcall but they are not always possible.

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

oooooh! Oh yes! I definatley understand that! That would be a very gross thing to walk into....a room with dirty sheets >.< eeeeew

I really hope that hasnt happened to anyone?

If it did, would you totally walk out of the room?

 

Question!

If you arrived to the lady's incall location and she or the atmosphere wasnt to your taste, would you then turn round and leave?

[Origin 268]

1. When going to an incall location, do you prefer Hotel chains or her apartment?

 

I prefer what the woman perfers. Her comfort, security, and safety is paramout in my eyes as she carries the most risk.

 

2. Upon entering the locale what are a few things that turn you on and off about it?

ie: the location itself, the appearance of the outside, the appearance of the inside, security buildings....ect

 

If it were a residence, I am unaffected by the appearence if I know the lady, repeat, as everyone lady as a different standard of living. First impressions however I am more cautious to the surroundings only to ascertain the prescence of redflags that would contribute to a sinister intenstions or a lifestyle (habits) of the lady that are not my preference.

 

If the incall location were in a hotel, I do pefer it being a little more upscale and comfortable. The appearence of the inside of the room is the most important variable for me. However it all depends on the financial means of the woman, and if there is the prior repport than nothing matters except her.

In all cases, cleaniness is key.

[Katherine of Halifax 113932]

I agree Angel, every person that visits I do everything in my power to make him feel special. If visiting my home I go to great lengths to see everything is spotless and welcoming. Nice music, new candles in the evening etc.

 

My bathroom is scrubbed with fresh towels and indivudally wrapped bars of soap, I am fully stocked with mouthwash and even a new, in package toothbrush. Its my hotel at home.

 

When I am visiting other palces I like my guests to have a seperate bathroom, I order extra towels, soap etc and it looks like no one has visisted at all. I'll even clean myself if needed.

 

We should all feel honoured when a gentleman chooses to visit with us and to show my appreciation I will treat you like a King while you are with me.

[Apex2006 1071]

oooooh! Oh yes! I definatley understand that! That would be a very gross thing to walk into....a room with dirty sheets >.< eeeeew

I really hope that hasnt happened to anyone?

If it did, would you totally walk out of the room?

 

Question!

If you arrived to the lady's incall location and she or the atmosphere wasnt to your taste, would you then turn round and leave?

 

 

I would say I would walk out, but would this piss off the lady?

[Guest **cely***r***ne]

Hmmm, it may upset her, or it may make her take a look around and make her think...what am I doing wrong?

If it was me in this situation, I think a walk out would be a reality check...

altough I would never put myself in that position.

Perhaps before you just turn around and leave you could politley as possible say "maybe if you cleaned up and made your residance/lodgings more appealling you would be very successful" and always throw a compliment the lady's way....I find compliments always make a disgruntled lady feel a little better :)

[PistolPete 61421]

and being a curious kitten I'm interested to know the answers to them.

 

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety?

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby?

 

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once?

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply!

 

and being a curious kitten I'm interested to know the answers to them. I love a gorgeous, sexy curious kitten, thought I answer that too ;)

1. Does the anticipation to meet your SP cause performance anxiety? No sometimes maybe because of age I may blow my load to early, but never had an issue getting hard and aroused. But I enjoy pleasuring a lady first so she can be aroused first,and feel very comfortable with me. ;)

 

2. Does the feeling get better or worse with time spent in the hobby? Much better, so many lovely ladies,and the intimacy can get better as well :) ALSO when repeating with an SP is always so much fun, and the feelings and sexuality gets hot and really both know what turns their crank.

3. Does the nervousness continue even though you've met with her more than once? No the anticipation is fun though I'm not nervous ever meeting a Sp for 2nd,3rd,4th,5th...well you get the picture.

 

4. Do you ever wonder if she is feeling the same way?

Well could be if it is a first encounter, she might be nervous, also know that a SP that I've seen prior really enjoys our time together and we are like good friends and good lovers behind closed doors.

 

5. And does it make it easier for you if you knew she was just as nervous? Or would it make you more nerved up?

No I would want the lady to be relaxed, to enjoy herself, I have said that before to an SP try breaking the ice by chatting,share a glass of wine,champagne..., and after some hugging,cuddling kissing the heated passion then leads to no nervous feeling. A huge key is communicating to her prior to the appointment to find out likes and dislikes.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my post! I appreciate every reply!

 

Additional Comments:

Thank you all for responding to my earlier questions! I have a couple more...but if they are repeat questions from somewhere else...I'm sorry :D

 

1. When going to an incall location, do you prefer Hotel chains or her apartment?

 

2. Upon entering the locale what are a few things that turn you on and off about it?

ie: the location itself, the appearance of the outside, the appearance of the inside, security buildings....ect

 

1. When going to an incall location, do you prefer Hotel chains or her apartment? Either way, I'm happy

2. Upon entering the locale what are a few things that turn you on and off about it?

ie: the location itself, the appearance of the outside, the appearance of the inside, security buildings....ect

For clarity a lady may not have the opportunity to live in a high class condo, or apartment,or what end of town. It is all based on her income and other financial burdens in her life. For example, is she going to school part-time and can only afford xxx dollars for rent,I often see that the appearance of the building on the outside is not great but her place is spotless in the inside, that itself will tell you lots about the lady and that is important. She should not be held to a lower playing level because of her in call locale may not be up to everyone's standard.Now if the place is in area well know in the city to selling of street drugs, and we all know those areas by news media, I will stay away.

I hope that makes sense to your questions.

 

[Victoria Banks 21899]

What makes a really great experience?

 

Other than the obvious..

television turned off, lots of towels in a clean bathroom,

a clean and tidy smoke free room and the lady into it..

[stevecurious 42059]

What makes a really great experience?

 

Please, please don't forget to turn the phone off/down. This goes for both the guys and girls.;)

[PistolPete 61421]

What makes a really great experience?

 

Other than the obvious..

television turned off, lots of towels in a clean bathroom,

a clean and tidy smoke free room and the lady into it..

 

What makes a really great experience? Passion,intimacy,sensuality,communication,erotic play,honesty about likes and dislikes,foreplay and of course multiple positions,and taking your time enjoying each other.I also enjoy the shower together if she would enjoy the same prior to and even after.

[Apex2006 1071]

What makes a really great experience?

 

Other than the obvious..

television turned off, lots of towels in a clean bathroom,

a clean and tidy smoke free room and the lady into it..

 

 

I'm with pete on this one, I like lots of positions, conversation and humor are also lots of things that make it more memerable.

 

I also like it when I arrive that the person is ready and waiting, I have been asked a few time to wait in my car so that they can finish showering or for whatever reason they need more time.

 

Also. some music is nice too!

 

And all phones should be off!!!!!

[Guest f***2f***]

Answer to Cindy

 

Sexy greeting at the door...a kiss and a hug...phones off and no checking pms on the computer halfway through. Clean, well groomed and smell like a million bucks!! I love girls who smell delicious!! A nice subtle perfume, not overpowering.

 

Clean place, upscale hotel or in-call condo. I am a little nervous about meeting in a private home if I don't know the lady.

 

Wine or a cool beverage (I usually bring wine) pleasant talk and an interest in my conversation as i am in hers...good conversation is a turn on.

 

sexy lingerie or outfit...wearing what was requested sometimes is nice.

 

CHEMISTRY!! and a gal who likes what she's doing...for me that means she's getting pleasure from me as well as the other way around...been around enough to pretty much tell if it's not genuine. A mechanical menu driven situation is un-cool....love the GFE experience which is why I'm a repeater....builds trust, chemistry and it keeps getting better.

 

Honesty...tell me if something is not working or unpleasant or if you've got an idea that I might like...yeah!!

 

Cuddles after and pillow talk....giggling, tickling, sharing some laughs.

 

Well those are things that make for a pleasant experience for me.:mrgreen: