Beauty Salons and SP's...

[Studio 110 by Sophia 150333]

This may be a rant, but heck...

 

I was at a hairdresser not long before I left on vacation. I was so irritated, as she wanted to discus every aspect of my life with her. I am sure she was trying to be friendly, but it felt invasive. Maybe because I am normally tight lipped about my life, as I really do not have much in common with 95% of women I meet.

 

She was bitching about her man, her kids, jealous girls, etc.....

OHHHH BOY! I have absolutely nothing to bitch about in my life, hahaha.

 

She would ask " does your husband do that?" I say, "I am not married" And my BF would never do that to me....

 

Then she moves on the kids, complaining about behavior, school costs, etc...

" how old are your kids?" she asks....

"I do not have kids, I have dogs" I reply.

 

Then moves on to work life, surly I must have something to bitch about here she thinks....

 

" what do you do for living? Do you like your job?" inquisitively asks me.

" yes, I love my job, I work for myself" I reply anticipating the next question...

 

I am trying to show her I am not into talking, just want my hair done. I play on my phone, but just keeps asking more and more!

 

I simply looked at her, with a polite and firm voice I say,

" listen, I am sorry but I am not interested in talking about my life to a stranger. No offence, but I am uncomfortable with this and prefer to just have my hair trimmed"

 

She was very upset, face dropped and I felt terrible for having to say this. BUT WOW...why do beauty salons have to turn into a bitch fest? Are there that many things to complain about in life? And to a stranger at that?

 

I LOVE MY NAIL TECH!

He asks simple questions, how are you doing? How was your vacation, etc...then he gets to work making my hands soft and pretty! I even told him I appreciate his style, and he totally got me on this issue. He said he understands, cause he does the same thing. JUST WANT MY HAIR CUT, lol

 

I guess it is another reminder of how different we SP's are from the general population. Whereas, we are accustomed to keeping things to ourselves and usually sharing complaints with other SP friends. Next time I sit in hair dressing chair, I am going say it right off the back that I prefer to read then chat, so I am not hurting anyone's feelings.

[EllieWilde 216]

I agree - sometimes I just don't want to talk. I want my hair cut. Or my eyebrows waxed. Without having to share everything about my life. It's not a social thing, it's a service that you're paying for and you deserve to be comfortable.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Yea, before I met someone I stuck to for doing my hair, I'd get the same questions. I have an amazing guy who does my hair and he's been doing it for 14 years. He knows people's body language and when to engage in convo and when not to. Other times he just sings and has a fabulous voice.

 

I think when people deal with a lot of people on a daily basis, you get to read their body language. I've become an expert. lol. There are certain cues you to tend pick up when people no longer wish to engage in conversation. There has to be a good balance and the person providing the service knowing those cues. Otherwise it can become tiresome and intrusive after a while.

 

In our line of work, I prefer to hit the sheets first with some light chat to warm up while getting undressed and then some pillow talk later if it's mutual. If a client wants to sit down and talk at the beginning, I have no problems with that but I let them be the one to initiate that. Often times that occurs on multiple hour appts.

[frenchbrute 1090]

You might honestly get a few varying opinions on this subject but, as with most service industry jobs, chatting up clientele is part and parcel of it. Seriously, how many times can you talk to people about weather in the day? For hairdresser's, nail tech's, RMT's they have a person in front of them who can,t go anywhere or do anything but talk or sleep. For most, it's a cheaper version of a therapist. I have had the same woman doing my hair since I was a pre-teen and her a new hairdresser. She's probably listened to more dating, work and relationship stories than my parents. Like it or not these people will make a comment or two about what you have to say to keep you engaged. Sometimes yes it can been invasive but it's up to you to guide the conversation. At first it bothered me when she would talk about some things in front of other clients but then I would just spin things and make jokes. It became a regular thing to make jokes about stories in my life to the point that her and the other hairdressers enjoyed when it was my next visit. You should just simply choose what you are willing to share and what you are keeping in mind that when it comes to these places people will share ad all bets are off when it comes to keeping secrets.

[Ice4fun 78396]

In general I am not a big on sharing personal information about myself with strangers so like you I tend to dislike being quizzed by people providing a service to me. So maybe SP'S are not that different.

 

Now having said that there seems to be one exception to my unwillingness to share with people I have just met...lol... get me naked with a beautiful SP and I will share way more than I probably should. There is something about being naked that breaks down my barriers....lololol

 

Just my opinion.

[Guest P*rry]

I apologize beforehand ...

 

Suite Escape; You must have wanted to make a sweet escape out of that chair.

[Guest S****r]

I so get you! I recently tried a new salon because it was conveniently located next to my incall. Boy, was that a mistake! The hairdresser, a guy, asked me a million questions. I couldn't get out of there fast enough, and I never went back there again for that one reason. Too bad, too, because it was a very convenient location.

[CristyCurves 169032]

People are people and you get nosy invasive, intrusive people in all occupations, even in the sp world. When I joined cerb there was a female member that emailed me endlessly asking me question after question about my personal business:(

But as some one who has worked in the beauty industry I can attest that customers can be just as nosy:) We all should know when and what is polite to ask and discuss. The best thing to do when you meet someone that is asking to many questions is to politely tell them that you are a private person and would prefer to discuss things that don't pertain to your personal life. You can still be friendly and talk about lots of other subjects. When doing someone's hair, nails, esthetics there is nothing more awkward than silence so finding a balance is the key and sometimes you have to be the one that takes the person in the direction of balance. She is probably a nice person that was just trying to create a rapport, but had no idea how not to cross boundaries and more than likely wasn't even aware that she was. After all, in the Maritimes people ask question after question, especially of strangers. That's my experience anyway:)

[Studio 110 by Sophia 150333]

Thanks for everyone's input:)

I see your points about maybe being a part of their job, but seriously, like others mention, you need to read body language. I was so annoyed after getting my hair done, it sort of ruined my day. I left grumpy and will not return there.

Yes this is a good reminder to me as someone who is also service orientated to be sure I am not doing the same. I usually will have some light chat, but then when the massage really begins I prefer to listen to their body responding to my touch, concentrate on the task at hand.

Thanks all!

[whatsup 11893]

In my experience some salon workers are just looking for gossip more than just well respected private comunication. Point being I gave a certain hairdresser a complete line of utter bullshit and went to a different salon and found out my story had made it to that salon. Loose lips sink ships. So always be wary of what you say. My 2 cents.

[VedaSloan 119179]

Meh. I'm upfront. I don't mind the chatter. They ask what I do, and I tell them I escort.

 

My old hairdresser knew, my current barber knows and I just saw a new waxer today and now she knows too.

 

I get that not everyone is an open book like me though.

 

Once I was trash talking cops to my waxer (years ago) and it turned out her husband was a cop. OOOPS.

[Jasmine Rain 23126]

If I am not in the mood for chit chat, I usually try to politely get that out of the way in the beginning. When most ask how I am doing, I simply say that I great now that I get some "me" to sit in piece and quiet getting pampered. I then close my eyes and just try to relax.

 

For the most part, people get the hint. They are service people, they know that sometimes people use their services as a time to relax as well. It is just easier to tell them straight at the beginning. Then I don't have to reply on body language or possible offending someone who is not picking up the cues.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

The people I deal with are cool and have known them for 15 years or so. That's how long I've had the same stylist for. On the night of the past social, I wanted to get a wash and hair dry done... My usual stylist is always booked months in advance so I picked my next go to person who does this for me on special occasions.

 

She was going through a difficult time and asked for my advice on certain things ( mostly spiritual and meditative type healing that has changed my life forever now in the most positive way and a lot of people have been asking me about this) while helping her deal with some things and how to go about it.

 

She really appreciated it and when went I went back 3 weeks later to get my hair highlighted, she was very happy and seemed in a much better place. So imo you get what you give and it makes the time go A LOT quicker! lol

 

However, if it's someone I don't know, I go very general with subjects. I don't like the 20/20 route some stylists go down or anyone for that matter.

[Hannah Star 2136]

its so true about the nail salon being more discreet , not 21qs- the third degree , family tree etc.. :) bonus cuz our hands are tied and we cant play with phones to discract :

[Helena D'Orville 33237]

Have you ever left a massage session feeling more exhausted and more stressed than before the session started? Well, it happened to me! The guy - registered massage therapist - would not stop talking, even if I would not answer him. He was talking to me about his whole life, his cat, that he liked to write "spicy" - can't use other word, censored - adult fictions (no problem for me to hear about this, of course, but this place is only about regular therapeutic massages, nothing more, so I wonder how other clients may have reacted to these information!). Not really concentrated on his task - how surprising - he ended the session 10 minutes sooner, realized this when I was about to leave the room, and apologized offering me to go back on the table for these 10 minutes left. Guess what I answered...