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This topic has hit very close to home for me, and so I will share something extremely personal because I think it's relevant to the topic. And it also speaks to the violence that anyone can experience, not just sex workers. In my third year of university, way before I became a sex worker, I was raped by an ex-boyfriend. And it took me almost four years before I admitted it was even rape and stopped blaming myself. I suffered from severe depression at the time, and was in a vulnerable spot and I didn't want to be alone. I called him and he refused to come over unless I agreed to sleep with him, and because I was so desperate for company, I agreed, even though I did not want to. When he got there, I told him I wasn't going to sleep with him and he got very irate. He said he wasn't leaving unless I slept with him because he "didn't come over for nothing." I continued to say no, that I wasn't up to it, and I started to cry. He unzipped his pants, laid back on my bed, and told me to "get on." I shook my head and he just stayed in the same position and repeated how he wasn't leaving until he got what he wanted. So I fucked him. And I cried the entire time. And I blamed myself for giving in. Rape doesn't need to be violent for it to be rape. I took the following from a rape survivor website: If your partner has sex with you under any of the following circumstances, it is rape/sexual assault: Physical violence i.e. hitting, choking Threats with weapons Continuing sexual activity after you have indicated you wish to stop. (It doesn't matter if you initially consented; people change their minds for a number of reasons all the time. Your wishes should be respected). Overpowering you with physical strength, pinning you down Threats to harm you or a third person Threats to your property/pets Threats to rape you if you don't give in -that basically says "let me rape you or I'll rape you" - sex gained under such a threat is rape. Depriving you of liberty until you acquiesce to a sexual demand; i.e. "you don't leave this room until I get what I want". Having sexual intercourse with you while you are sleeping or incapacitated by drugs/alcohol to the extent that you cannot give or withdraw consent Refusal to allow you to sleep until you give in to sexual demands (note: sleep deprivation is a recognized form of torture) Sexual activity after continuous pressure on you to have sex before you are ready, to perform acts you have stated you don't like; or just going ahead and doing it. Putting you in a position where you must engage in one form of sexual activity to prevent something "worse" from happening i.e. you have to engage in oral sex in order to avoid anal rape. It is important that you realize you do not have to have physically fought or even said "no" for an act to be regarded as sexual assault. Tears or other expression of discomfort are more than reasonable indicators that you do not want the sexual activity. Often, sexually violent partners do not actually seek consent, or if you do say no, it is not taken any notice of. Remember that submission is not the same as consent.

Lot of guys are calling me, asking me how I work, if there's somthing they should do before coming to my place, how to be at ease toghetter... Here's my Top 10 of things I appreciate... They are not always available (the guy having a relationship, or in a rush), but others are VERY appreciate from most of escorts, I think... 1. I feel more confident when the client places the money in a way I can see it and count it as soon as he enters my room... 2. I preffer when he uses my stuff instead of his... If I am using a certain brand instead of another, it's because I feel more cormftable with it, and I know this stuff is safe. Also, some SPs may be allergic to yours, and eventhough you lost your time, but hers also... 3. I love when we get to know each others a bit before the session. I'm not the kind of bang-bang, ciao... I'm about to give you the best service I can... Help me by telling me what you like and what you don't... 4. I feel a little nervous about cops... I preffer he undresses before I have to ask... I am an SP, your not the first guy I saw naked... And don't worry, NOBODY has a perfect body, so don't be shy, I've seen worst! 5. I feel more at ease when he's asking for a quick shower before the session... In most of incall places, there's shower and towells available... Use it! 6. There's a line between rough and violent... Please, respect your SP... 7. Alchool and drugs can create issues or behaviors that will make both uncormftable... 8. If you are not an expert (and there's no experts in sex) take the SPs advice... We are doing this for a living... If there's something she feels wrong about, either she will teach you how to do it properly, or asking you not to do it... Everybody has something to learn... 9. Rough beard can causes a lot of dammage to an SP... Either in kissing or DATY... Also, it's not fun to suck on an hairy dick and sack... Please think of us... Sanded nails are also always appreciated... 10. TO RESPECT EACH OTHER'S LIMITS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING FOR YOU AND HER... Again, showing up to your wife with a shaved sack, when you never did it in 20 years is a bit suspicious... Not all of lines of conducts are possible, and we, as girls, can understand that... But please understand that due to different factors your mileage may vary(YMMV) according to how many efforts we both put into are meeting... AFTER ALL, AN SP IS SOMEBODY YOU WILL NEVER EXPECT TO GET A DATE WITH, BUT IS THERE TO GIVE YOU THE BEST MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE!!!

Fairly new here but I felt I needed to vent about something. I have had the opportunity to enjoy the company of several escorts and have had mostly positive experiences. I also try and keep to one or two SPs on a regular basis and have found that they are respectful, courteous and polite when treated with respect. however, they all have several horror stories about some men not treating them with respect. This is inexcusable. These ladies are doing their customers a favour and their company is a privilege. And until what they do is recognized by the law, they are quite often taking chances. I could write an entire novel on this and I realize I'm probably preaching to the converted on this site but i felt I had to vent. Thanks.:-x

I know this is not directly related to the thread subject BUT I would like to point out an important detail! Flossing and brushing your teeth before an intimate rendez-vous with a lovely Lady (or with a gentleman) should be avoided!!! Why? Because flossing and brushing can cause your gums to bleed therefore creating a perfect opening for HIV to get into your bloodstream. http://www.aidsmap.com/en/docs/C858FF44-5E81-4F59-8030-B5A3C7A93654.asp "Look after your mouth. The likelihood of oral HIV transmission increases if one has bleeding gums, ulcers, cuts or sores in the mouth. Don’t brush your teeth or floss before oral sex." Something to think about ;) Use mouthwash and stay safe! ;) xox

I have been wondering these questions: Is "cerb" located in an office? Technically cerb is a website so it's on a hard drive in a computer in cyberspace... but Yes, our company is design co. (same owners as escorts-canada.com localescort.ca and many other escort related sites) We have a physical office in Barrie Ontario (but... I often work from home - Shhh! Don't tell anyone!). I go in to the office for weekly meetings (and to cover for people when they are away like this week for instance as Dave "the site manager for localescort.ca" is on vacation this week so we are all covering his shifts). Mod, are you male? female? I am male but keep in mind I am not the only mod on cerb all the time. we do have female staff as well and we all read the threads on cerb (I know this as they are topic of conversation at the office all the time). Any of the staff can log in as the MOD (but few ever do unless I am away now). we use to share this account equally but when the site started to get really busy it was just confusing having everyone moderate at the same time. We were stepping on each others shoes. I guess I drew the short straw (Just Kidding - I actually enjoy moderating the site most of the time, most of you are friendly and I still enjoy being part of the site - I just hate the trouble makers, complainers, people who continue to break the same rules over and over and basically anyone who makes my job harder than it needs to be). When was "cerb" started? It was started back in 2001 (I think) we did not start it ... it was started by a guy names Mark (in Vancouver) and was part of the localescorts.ca website. We purchased the site from him and in 2003 and we separated the site from localescorts and cerb was born later that year. We than upgraded to the software that we use today in 2004 (after the old software was hacked badly as the original software it ran on was FREE software and not secure) Most memorable moments? With cerb? When the site started to really take off back in 2004 and we proved a escort site without all the negative reviews or circus threads with people fighting and ganging up on people would be popular! Scary Stories? We have had some really pissed off pimps recently and some very unstable people over the years (they usually feel the need to call us and threaten whoever is unfortunate enough to answer the call) - I personally only answer the phones when I am covering for someone so luckily I just hear about the crazies but I have had a few myself. I can count the people on my hands that scare me... so it's no more or no less than any other type of business. What is the traffic like on a daily basis? I have posted traffic stats in the past for cerb. It gets very good traffic. Do a search for "Traffic" and you will find some threads with details and stats. Any challenges "running" cerb? Every day! Basically you could say running a site like this is a challenge. The list of challenges is a mile long and I would not have the time to go into that one! LOL... I can say it sure is not as easy as it would look from the outside. Hackers, spammers, trouble makers, complainers, rule breakers, immature people, kids, gossip, flame wars, PM spam, moderating, site upgrades, site updates, security patches, new mods, adding features, maintaining multiple servers to run one site, budgets, etc... etc... etc...it never ends. In order to have a site that looks like everyone follows the rules take a LOT of work. Thankfully we have a lot of really great members here who help by flagging bad posts and spam PMs, offering advise and much more!

Most of it has already been said but, expect is one thing, some of this is obviously what I expect, other things are what I would like, especially on first visits, repeat visits often I jump right in, but the first time should be handled with care. -GFE+ is important, the best experiences I had start with a chat on the first visit, in fact I usually book extra time when I see a new SP just for that reason. The truly exceptional ones were the ones that messaged me in advance almost reminding me (not that I would forget) that I am seeing them in a few days or hours. And of course when you are there the phone should be off, laptop closed, etc.. -Like any business that you want to be successful care about your clients, you are supposed to be our GFE for the experience, take a few moments to re-read the PM's, remember the name, any special requests, any details they mentioned. What impresses me is if I mention I liked something about them, or it is a repeat and we talked about an outfit or prefered actions that you respond with those suggestions. In business I always research the company so when I meet my clients I know what they do and their needs so I can respond to them...it is the same in any industry. -I have to do incalls and prefer to meet at the hotel or residence the SP works out of. Discretion obviously is important so definitely no calls to me, texts imo are fine as long as they are careful. Another great person also deletes my number from her phone (history and texts) after our time, not because she doesn't like me, but to protect me. -Shower facilities are a must as I usually opt for early morning sessions and go to work afterwards. I am very well groomed so generally am not asked to shower first, but love shower play so would have no issues starting with that:-D -Absolutely no other people in the room unless it is a duo, privacy in this hobby is key to me and I think it would be highly unproffesional if someone else was there (male or female...male way worse of course). The arrangement is between me and the provider..anyone else is an unknown and my spider senses would tingle and I would probably, no I would definitely, leave. -Space your visits apart...please! I know things go long sometimes and people are in this as a business, but what will guarantee no repeat from me is bumping into the next guy on my way out. It has never happened to me, but it is something I have worried about, part of the reason I choose the ones who are well recommended and will never TOFTT (sorry). -It doesn't really need to be said, but no drugs and very little drinking, a glass or two of wine together is fine, but walking in and seeing a person wobbling will have me right back out the door. -It sounds cheesy but make me feel special, I can get sex in other ways but I am here for the experience, if it is mechanical I am done...I know that is not always easy depending on the client or the chemistry, but put that effort in there and the success will come (imho).

http://www.libbydavies.ca/blog/2009/05/21/record-it-s-decriminalization-not-legalization-sex-trade For the Record?.It?s Decriminalization not Legalization - of the sex trade. May 21, 2009 Blog entry Every now and again I get an email telling me I support legalization of prostitution and brothels, and some media articles have repeated this misrepresentation of my position. I think it?s important to clear up the misrepresentation as I have never advocated or supported legalization of prostitution. Nor do I support red light zones, or commercial enterprises, state licensing, and the measures of a legalized regime. I do support reducing and eliminating violence, harm, and risk, and support labour rights, health and safety rights, and the human rights of sex workers I have been working with organizations, individuals, and all levels of government on this issue for over a decade. I?ve also written extensively over the years on this issue. In summary, here?s what I?ve said, For the Record: December, 2001 - Statement in the House of Commons Mr. Speaker, the number of women missing from the downtown east side is a tragedy. Earlier this month the joint police task force released the names of 18 more women who are missing, bringing the number to 45 women. Many of them were involved in the sex trade and are at risk to the most awful violence and death. I believe all levels of government must co-operate with all possible resources to find out what has happened to these women and to prevent more deaths and harm from taking place. SFU criminologist, John Lowman has said repeatedly that women will continue to disappear and be killed unless Canada's prostitution laws are changed. I implore the Minister of Justice to pay attention. These women are not pieces of garbage that can be disposed of. They are human beings with every right to dignity, safety and hope for the future. They demand our attention. February 2002 ? Letter to Federal Minister of Justice Mr. Minister, I believe the status quo is completely unacceptable given the enormity of the situation in Vancouver. The seriousness of this situation calls for leadership and action. I am therefore urging you to begin an immediate review of federal laws pertaining to soliciting that puts many of these women at risk on the street. It is vital to improve their safety in the community. October 2002- The Hill Times, Time to debate the impact of Canada's hypocritical laws relating to the sex trade The missing women and many more who are still working the streets today are not only victims of their own tragic individual circumstances, but they also fall victim to the failure of public policy. The criminalization of drug users and sex workers and their resulting marginalized status places them at greater and greater risk. The law not only failed them, it aided and abetted their demise. Federal laws pertaining to prostitution force women on the street into dangerous and illegal activities. February, 2003- Libby gets her motion passed for a Parliamentary review of solicitation laws That the Standing Committee on Justice and Human Rights be ordered to review the solicitation laws in order to improve the safety of sex-trade workers and communities overall, and to recommend changes that will reduce the exploitation of and violence against sex-trade workers. February, 2004 ? Libby?s Op-Ed, Solicitation Laws put Sex Trade Workers at Risk ? It?s Time for Action! The exploitation, murder and violence against sex trade workers in Canada is increasing at an alarming rate, but the laws dealing with prostitution remain unchanged and governments remain unwilling to realistically deal with this growing public safety issue that affects some of the most vulnerable people in our society. For too long law enforcement agencies have relied on the criminal code as the primary means to contain prostitution. It has been a failure, both from the perspective of assisting and protecting women in the sex trade as well as in mitigating the impacts of street prostitution on local communities. Urgent action to address this situation is needed on several fronts: 1)Law enforcement agencies with the support of the Minister of Justice should immediately halt enforcement of Section 213 (the communicating law) of the Criminal Code. A moratorium would help improve the relationship between women on the street and the police, and improve safety. 2)The parliamentary committee must bring in recommendations for law reform that focuses on reducing harm and exploitation. This should include decriminalization as an option. The ongoing criminalization of these women has been a human disaster and we must have the courage to change these laws. 3)Immediate help is needed to provide liveable income support and training and decent housing that is safe and affordable. The improvement of front line safety and exit supports that barely exist today, must be made a priority. The links between deepening poverty and the sex trade are inescapable. Disastrous public policy decisions and cut backs at a provincial level are putting more women at risk every day. Increased criminalization for prostitution does nothing to address the reasons why women have become involved in the sex trade in the first place. Through the provision of adequate and affordable housing, social assistance and minimum wage rates that reflect the real cost of living and increased education and training services, many sex workers would no longer see prostitution as their only viable alternative for survival. At this time we must consider the best way society can reduce violence against sex workers and protect the safety of local communities. October,2004 - Statement in the House of Commons Further to my letter of September 22nd, I again implore Minister Cotler to take urgent action and work with law enforcement agencies to place a moratorium on enforcement of the communicating laws under the Criminal Code. The current criminalization of sex trade workers under these sections of the Code discourages or prevents women from contacting the police when their safety is in jeopardy. As well, I continue to call on the Mayor, as Chair of the Vancouver Police Board, to conduct an inquiry into police investigation of the missing women case to determine what happened. Violence against women, particularly of Aboriginal women, has been highlighted this week by Amnesty International in a report titled Stolen Sisters: A Human Rights Response to Discrimination and Violence Against Indigenous Women in Canada. I support the recommendations in this report urge action to address the ongoing social and economic marginalization of indigenous women and to ensure the police and justice systems adequately protect these women. March 2006 - Libby?s Op-Ed Decriminalization is needed to protect women There is no other group in our society as stigmatized, criminalized and misrepresented as often as women involved in prostitution. Everyone has an opinion, but it rarely reflects the harsh reality faced by sex workers who encounter violence, poverty, discrimination and isolation. Prostitution is legal in Canada, and consensual sex between two adults for money is not itself an offence. However, under the Criminal Code, most activities related to prostitution are illegal, including communicating, keeping a common bawdy house and living off the avails of prostitution. While much of the public debate has focused on street prostitution and 90 per cent of police enforcement is directed at arresting men and women for communicating in public for the purpose of prostitution, studies show that approximately 80 per cent or more of sex work is off the street. Sex workers are fearful to report violence, assault and coercion, because of the illegal environment they operate in, and the retaliation and criminalization they face from law enforcement. We need a comprehensive strategy that focuses law enforcement on eliminating the harms and violence in sex work, while providing real choices to women, based on human rights, dignity and opportunities for quality of life. This broad approach is not a simplistic "legalization" regime; rather, it's a realistic effort to repeal harmful laws in order to improve the health and safety of sex workers and reduce the violence they experience. December, 2006 Libby?s statement on the Justice Sub-Committee on Solicitation Laws. The Subcommittee began its work on October 2, 2003 as a result of my motion unanimously adopted in parliament on February 9, 2003 [1], to review prostitution laws to improve the safety of sex trade workers and the community in general and to make recommendations to reduce the exploitation and violence against sex workers. The Subcommittee held both public and in-camera meetings in Ottawa, Toronto, Montreal, Halifax, Vancouver, Edmonton and Winnipeg from Jan 31 to May 30, 2005. We heard from almost 100 witness, including residents, academics, private citizens, members of the judiciary, police officers, sex workers and community organizations. The Subcommittee also met informally with well over 100 sex workers and heard directly about their life experiences, the problems they face and solutions recommended. The Sub-Committee?s final report has now been tabled in the House of Commons. Context ? Prostitution is legal in Canada Consensual sex between two adults for money is not in itself an offence. However, under the criminal code, most activities related to prostitution are illegal. Section 213 of the Criminal Code makes communicating for the purposes of prostitution, keeping a common bawdy house and living off the avails of prostitution, illegal. ? Current legislative framework is inadequate Almost all witnesses agreed that the status quo is not protecting sex workers or local communities. These views support the 20 year old Fraser Report which argued that it was ?the contradictory and often self-defeating nature of the Criminal Code that was at the root of the high levels of street prostitution in Canada.? ? The Communicating Law (Code 213) displaces the problem When sex workers are displaced to isolated areas, usually the result of complaints, John sweeps etc. they face greater risks for harm, even death, and become easier targets for predators. ? Only 5% to 20% of all prostitution is street related Although 90%of enforcement is directed to the communication law related to street prostitution, studies overwhelmingly show that street prostitution makes up somewhere between 5% and 20% of all forms prostitution in Canada. Most information and statistics on prostitution is on street prostitution. ? Prostitutes are fearful to report violence, assault and coercion Because of the illegal environment they operate in, women and men working as prostitutes are reluctant to report crimes committed against them, are subject to police harassment and racial profiling. Increased policing has led to moving the trade further underground. ? There are various forms of prostitution Prostitution can range from abhorrent acts of debt bondage, to the ?survival? sex trade, to consenting adult activities. It includes street prostitution, escort and call-girl services, message parlours, private apartments, clubs, bars, hotels etc. ? Not all prostitutes consider themselves victims Perhaps the most difficult idea to understand is that some women are working in prostitution by choice. We heard consistent testimony from sex workers across the country that many women work independently, work for the advantages of the trade (schedule, wages) and develop strong relationships with their clients. Conclusions from the Subcommittee ? The status quo is unacceptable ? Any strategy must encompass: prevention, education, harm reduction and treatment, and must consider the underlying factors of poverty, social isolation, inequality, poor housing and under/un-employment. ? Zero tolerance when it comes to the sexual exploitation of children and youth (under 18 years of age) ? The State should protect persons practicing prostitution from violence and exploitation. Recommendations from Libby Davies ? There is near unanimous agreement from all the witnesses heard from, that the current status and regime of law enforcement, pertaining to prostitution is unworkable, contradictory and unacceptable. It has created an environment of marginalization and violence, with negative impacts both on sex workers, and affected local communities. The current regime of law enforcement, particularly the communicating law, is harmful and further endangers sex workers. ? Any changes for liberalization in the law must focus on adult activities. There is unanimous agreement that there should be no tolerance for the sexual exploitation of minors as defined by law (under 18 years of age), nor should we allow the criminalization of minors. ? We must retain laws against trafficking, as against someone's will, while ensuring that trafficked victims are provided safety, status, and help. ? We must recognize that sex work involves many different forms, from debt bondage, to survival sex work, to consenting choices being made. ? Sexual activities, whether or not payment is involved, between consenting adults that does not harm others, should not be prohibited by the State. ? The key principle and issue at hand, is to distinguish between what is consenting between adults, and what is not. The current laws pertaining to prostitution cannot do this and thus impose a regime that, in and of itself, is harmful to those involved in sex work. Law enforcement should be focussed against fraud, coercion, violence, child sexual abuse, rape, and sexual assault, whether or not in the context of prostitution. ? Prostitutes are fearful to report violence, assault and coercion because of their illegal status. Their poor relationship with law enforcement authorities, contributes to the danger they face. Better training of law enforcement agencies is needed. ? The federal Government must come to terms with the contradictions and impossibility of the status-quo, and engage in a process of law reform that will lead to the decriminalization of laws pertaining to prostitution, thus allowing criminal sanctions to be focussed on harmful situations. This process should involve further research and involve sex workers and their advocates, provincial and municipal representatives, as well as other stakeholders, such as academic experts and law enforcement officials. ? Concrete efforts must be made immediately, to improve the safety of sex workers and assist them to exit the sex trade, if they are not there by choice, by providing significant resources for income support, education and training, poverty alleviation, and treatment for addictions. January 2007- Rabble.ca, Sex Workers Require Better Protection by Libby Davies The tragedy of the missing women from Vancouver's Downtown Eastside will generate enormous media attention as the trial gets underway. As the Member of Parliament representing Vancouver East (including the Downtown Eastside), I want to express my support and sympathy to the families and friends of the missing women who continue to grieve and be exposed to the violent and horrifying experience of what happened to these women. The tragedy of this situation is far reaching. For many in the Downtown Eastside and beyond there is a sense of loss and grief as people face the enormity of what has taken place. It raises many troubling questions about our society and about why these women were so at risk and vulnerable to violence, exploitation and death, and why so many sex workers continue to be at risk today. The disappearance of more than 60 women from the Downtown Eastside and hundreds more from across the country, also raises deeply disturbing questions about Canada's justice system and how it failed. Despite the recent media attention to Vancouver's missing women, no significant changes have been made at any level of government to protect sex workers, who remain at risk. I will continue to call for law reform, immediate support for exit strategies, and the need for a public inquiry, to ensure that necessary changes are made at all levels of government, to best protect the rights and safety of sex workers and affected communities. Current laws around prostitution make street level sex workers vulnerable to selective law enforcement as well as exploitation and violence. Survival sex workers are often poor and drug dependent, and are reluctant to seek protection under the law. Cuts in social programs and spending, together with increasing poverty, particularly over the past decade, have forced more women into survival sex trades. The Parliamentary Committee on Justice and Human Rights recently completed its report on prostitution laws, The Challenge of Change: a Study of Canada's Criminal Prostitution Laws. The Committee began its work October 2, 2003 as a result of my motion unanimously adopted in Parliament to review prostitution laws to improve the safety of sex trade workers and the community in general, and to make recommendations to reduce the exploitation and violence against sex trade workers. The report outlines the failure of the criminal code to protect sex workers and local communities. When sex workers are displaced to isolated areas as a result of the communicating law, they face greater risk for harm and death and become easier targets for predators. There was near unanimous agreement from witnesses heard at the committee that the current status and regime of law enforcement pertaining to prostitution is unworkable, contradictory and unacceptable. It has created an environment of marginalization and violence, with negative impacts on both sex workers and affected local communities. Sex workers are fearful to report violence, assault and coercion because of their illegal status. Their poor relationship with law enforcement authorities, contributes to the danger they face. Better training of law enforcement agencies is needed. I believe the federal government must come to terms with the contradictions and impossibility of the status quo, and engage in a process of law reform that will lead to the decriminalization of laws pertaining to prostitution and focus criminal sanctions on harmful situations. It is also critical for all levels of government to immediately improve the safety of sex workers and assist them to exit the sex trade if they are not there by choice, by providing significant resources for poverty alleviation and income support, education and training, and treatment for addictions. In February 2002, I called on the Mayor of Vancouver, as Chair of the Vancouver Police Board, to support an inquiry into the police investigation of the missing women to determine what happened. This public inquiry still needs to happen. February, 2007 - Libby?s statement in the House of Commons Mr. Speaker, every Valentine?s Day for the last 16 years, hundreds of people gather in the heart of Vancouver?s Downtown Eastside, to join in the annual Women?s Memorial March. Women from the community, and especially Aboriginal women, sisters and brothers, mothers, daughters and sons, march in memory of the hundreds of women who die each year from violence. This year is particularly sad and difficult for the families and friends of the women whose murders are before the courts, and who daily, are re-living those tragic events. The Highway of tears, in Northern BC, is further evidence of the appalling situation facing Aboriginal women. Members of the federal NDP caucus stand in solidarity with the family, friends and activists who are speaking out on this issue. We demand that all levels of government commit to end the cycle of violence against women, to improve the safety of women in the sex trade, and to provide desperately needed housing and income support. Too many women have suffered, and gone missing, across Canada. It is time to act. ...- There is substantial difference between decriminalization and legalization. Legalization implies a state run licensing system, which I do not support, whereas decriminalization removes those sections of the criminal code pertaining to adult consensual activity and focuses law enforcement on situations where there is exploitation, coercion, and violence, just as we would with any other activity. The Canadian news paper Xtra, published one of the more straightforward articles about decriminalization that I?ve read, explaining that legalizing sex work means instituting regulations that treat prostitution as a vice that needs to be contained and controlled, as opposed to decriminalization which treats it like work. Using New Zealand and Australia as examples, the article goes on to explain that under decriminalization sex workers are allowed all the labour-related rights and freedoms as any other worker. I have supported the idea of a safe house, run as a co-operative by sex workers for their own safety and control. I have also always advocated for the need to have resources, strategies and support for sex workers who want to exit the sex trade. Clearly the survival sex trade often involves women who are impoverished and suffering from trauma and addictions. I will continue to work on this issue to make sure there are changes to address the need to protect the dignity, human rights and safety of women.

a big one for me for incalls is RESPECT THE SPs DISCRETION when it comes to her location and her surroundings. once you walk in enter quickly and dont stand in the doorway saying something like "wow, you're hotter than your pictures" (even if its true) you never know who is passing by in the hall etc. enter quickly and close ythe door behind you, then you're free to do as you please. ;-) same applies when being walked to the door, when about to leave try not to discuss to heavily in detail her profession or your hobby....i rememebr in my old place you could hear an entire conversation from the hall if someone was talking outside.....its something that we always tend to forget until we realize how much we can hear others. so saying something like "I had a great time, I'll see you next week? same price?" might not go over well if heard from a nosy neighbor, lol

throughout my life an career i have known men from all walks of life. Men who fought against rommel in north africa....young men fearful facing their first time.... i have also known men who are trauma and abuse survivors. to begin with we always cry out "save the women and children" but at what point is a child magically transformed into a man and no longer in need of support? at what point do they change from child in need of protection into a man who we all blame for everything? i remember a friend of mine who was a slight man, spending days on my couch because he was afraid to go home.his girlfriend was a big girl and used to terrorize him. i remember one instance when we went to pick him up for band practice and she went crazy!!!she put on a pair f army boots and started kicking him...in front of us!clearly she was doing worse when we weren't there. another man whose wife denied him sex for 17 years. he was shaking and began to cry when i took my clothes off. we lay on the bed and held each other and he wept while he told me his story. he was so devastated he couldn't take his clothes off....a shell of the man he was... another , manipulated by a woman he believed was on birth control into having sex which resulted in pregnancy. being a man of honor he did the right thing and married her. she quickly became controling and abusive both physically and emotionally. he was a big man and so who would believe he was abused? she made false abuse accusations, embezelled money from his mother, lied about him to his children saying he was a drug addict so much so one of his daughters began voluteering in vancouver's downtown east side in an effort to find and save her father, and defaming his character so far and wide he eventually lost his business, became homeless and ended up in jail. once in prison she made false accusations of threatening letters which complicated his time in jail by casting him as a violent offender, less privelges and freedom inside. as sex workers we see men at their most vulnerable and over my 23 years in the industry i feel i have developed a heightened awareness of mens emotions in particular when they are feeling sad or vulnerable. this is an enormous power to hold over men and there are those workers/women who exploit this power. ethical people comfort those in need, criminals exploit them. the man in this case was vulnerable. i another letter from his wife she described the situation to me.his business was failing, he was worried about providing for his family and was suffering from a physical symptom of stress in the form of ED. he was vulnerable and the worker sensed it. she sensed it and moved in for the kill.she did it consciously, with malice and intent to cause harm. it's an assault. if a woman gets "wet" durng a sexual assault - is it no lnger a sexual assault? whether a man gets "hard" or not should not be a determining factor as to assault....imho....but conditions surrounding the case could be used to deterine specific intent to cause harm and thus assault. what say you all? love susie ps. how could he consent, he wasn't given all the facts- in order to form free and informed cosent a person must be given all facts and information related to the decision to consent, she never said " i am a crazy woman who will extort you". one can not consent under duress and with out all info related to decisions.

Your are correct there is nothing wrong if that question is asked discreetly and privately in PM not in a public discussion. The other members of the board were trying to suggest that to you nicely but instead you decided to make an issue of it. Your perception that the members of this board are not supportive is completely messed up. We are the most supportive hobbiest community I've come across, so long as the rules and common sense are respected. You made a faux pas, you were gently and kindly advised of it then made a big stink of it. Unfortunately you've chosen to pick up your toys and go play else where you are welcome to make that choice, it's no real loss to this community. After 3 years of membership no recommendations , one warning about an obvious scam and the rest of your posts were about this issue of being attacked ? You claim to be respectful to the ladies however you disrespected Belle not only by hijacking her thread but then to suggest you did not have a good encounter with her, in her own recomendation thread. Wow that's some realy respect. Ah, don't let the door hit you on the way out. C'ya!

It's a done deal then. Party On! Thursday Aug. 6th - 8pm till close - Club Paradise - SC - 1313 Bloor St. W., (south side of Bloor - one block west of Lansdowne) Will post more details etc later tonight and on going as they develop All Terbites and friends invited. Especially fellow Leos and of course all the ladies and other members of the adult industry community. PARTY ON! There is a party set up already for TERB but this is in Toronto, so I figure it would be ok to post here in the toronto section.

Rep points sent to you for this post, for someone that I've always enjoyed reading rec's (prior to new system) it was/still is always a pleasure to read your posts! MOD has said it correctly, you were key in Ottawa's Site being very popular! Thanks Dreamer! I tend to believe the others really don't/ or have not understood Dreamer, probably because of his absence lately, but now seems to back as the same guy we knew years back!

Speaking of that, shouldn't I have that elite member next to my name for 500+ posts? Just buggin ya :lol:

you can be God cause i am Jesus Christ, well at least that's what my s/o calls me