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All of this could have been avoided with a deposit. Why didn't you pay/offer one? There are still people who tour without asking for a deposit?

 

I am not sure how long you were scheduled to see her, but clients have no right to be mad (your words) at providers for cancelling in such circumstances, especially if you only booked her minimum package. It's ok and normal to be disappointed, but MAD at her? That's a strong reaction.  I personally would not feel safe to meet for the first time a man that I have made mad. 

 

 

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In this context along with what else he wrote “mad” seems more like frustrated.  

But I see how the word mad automatically makes you think that.  

He sounds like a very responsible customer and it is sad that he is punished because of others.  

Either party could suggest the deposit. 

To NJ I would think that if a provider cancels under these kind of circumstances it may also be that they are frustrated with how their day and trip is going and although they may not say it they might not be in the frame of mind to provide the service up to her and your expectations.  

So maybe it’s for the best and just gotta hope the stars align better in the future

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On 7/13/2019 at 8:39 AM, NotchJohnson said:

So my rant is to all the guys that don't show or cancel last minute with any ladies that travel to our city or even if they are local ladies.

Notch, I feel your pain as I've had providers cancel at the last minute as well and it can be very frustrating.  I would take your last comment one step further and include the guys that cancel last minute or don't show for local ladies as well.  I get it, things come up, but in the decade I have been hobbying I have had to cancel an appointment less than 5 times.  And when I do I always gave the lady as much advance notice as I could, determined if any compensation was required (the ladies understood and didn't request any compensation), and followed up with another booking when possible.  Time, and money, are important to both the client and provider and the clients need to take care of their end of the arrangement in good faith.

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20 hours ago, Genevieve Marceau said:

All of this could have been avoided with a deposit. Why didn't you pay/offer one? There are still people who tour without asking for a deposit?

 

I am not sure how long you were scheduled to see her, but clients have no right to be mad (your words) at providers for cancelling in such circumstances, especially if you only booked her minimum package. It's ok and normal to be disappointed, but MAD at her? That's a strong reaction.  I personally would not feel safe to meet for the first time a man that I have made mad. 

 

 

I did say that I was mad that she did this to me, but not mad at her, I was mad at all the other guys that did this to her.  And I did mentioned that I understand why she did this to me.  Fast forward a little after I wrote this rant, she contacted me and we ended up having a date and it was a great one on top of that.  I compensated her very well for what she did because I appreciated what she did for me.

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57 minutes ago, NotchJohnson said:

I did say that I was mad that she did this to me, but not mad at her, I was mad at all the other guys that did this to her.  And I did mentioned that I understand why she did this to me.  Fast forward a little after I wrote this rant, she contacted me and we ended up having a date and it was a great one on top of that.  I compensated her very well for what she did because I appreciated what she did for me.

Still could have been avoided with a deposit though, xx.

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I have to admit that I am very fortunate to be able to work the way I do. I wouldn’t say lucky because I have worked very hard to get where I am in life. 

 

When I was touring the east in June, I was doing it as a mini vacay and worked because why not??? LOL.

 

I only wanted to make a couple of appointments in each location that would cover hotel costs. I did have a very successful tour and of course came home with money and the entire trip was covered. However, if I needed to cover the trip AND bring home a substantial income to pay bills, feed kids, pay for general life, I can see the difficulty. Add to that, if the costs are not covered! 

 

These ladies do take great risk at possibly not making money. Everyone says it takes money to make money and I have been one to always believe that but this industry teaches me shit all the time and one thing I have learned is that for some ladies, this is not the case. They fork out the money for traveling, hotel, food, advertising, not to mention all the other stuff of pics, website, phones, make-up, outfits, condoms, lube, manicures, tanning, etc.  

 

So to spend all this money and we all know hotels are not cheap, to have men canceled, no show etc would be scary when you don’t have a lot of money to begin with. 

 

But some men just seem to think that it is no big deal. They don’t think or even see the damage that a no show can do to a girl. I can’t fault ladies looking for deposits or just canceling trips outright when they don’t have the quota met. Which sucks for guys like the OP. 

 

It is big bad circle of bullshit that I don’t think will change anytime soon. Which is sad. 

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She could have asked for a deposit but was probably upset over the cancellations and really needed to rest. I would have cut her a break in that case. 

 

Lesson learned: in future if this or another travelling lady insists on deposits, realize she is just trying to  protect herself against deadbeats, which has no reflection on you as a sincere client. Notch, I know you wouldn’t hesitate. 

A few years back,  I had an almost failed trip to Sydney NS when I had cerb members insisting on  

seeing me but when I actually got to town, all but one actually followed through.  His generosity  of extending the appointment  was the only thing that saved me from just breaking even. When I left town I was inundated with “sorry I missed you, when are you coming back? “ messages.  

 

So it’s not easy on us sometimes.

Edited by Mature Angela
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The endless no shows and last minute cancels are terrible. If you are considering an appointment with any lady, take these points into consideration:

-think about a time for an appointment you KNOW you can follow through on

- be sure to know where you are going (nothing worse than a no show of “I couldn’t find you”)

- try to act as if you are supposed to be there when entering a hotel! (There’s NOTHING more obvious than someone wandering around looking lost)

- show up looking the part. If meeting in a public place be dressed according what others wear there, do a ‘walk-through’ a few days prior to check the place out. (Showing up in jeans/t-shirt to a first class restaurant is a definite no no)

 

As providers we know that things happen, but when touring especially, all those that want to see you seem to have a lot of car accidents/pregnant wife in labour/just got called to work or just don’t bother showing up

 

I get slammed with rude comments for asking for small deposits to ensure your time, but this is the ONLY country I actually have to do that in! 

 

The OP said a few good points, those that just don’t show up/last minute cancel make it very difficult for the gentleman that do actually want to see you.

 

Edited by 50 Shades Raven
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Throughout my years of hobbying I have experienced cancellations by my providers, and I have had to cancel as well, but I have always sent a cancellation fee, and have received deposits back.  Life happens fast for both the ladies and the gents, especially for touring ladies with added expenses.  So I always send a deposit, I insist that I do in some cases, and this way neither party can feel mad or mistreated or taken advantage of.

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