Serious and malicious rumours

[Seymour 3970]

I am back now and putting in my time. ;)

 

Mod - one of these days I want to read a recommendation written by you - I mean everyone is allowed to have some fun sometime. :razz:

[E.D. man 691]

Brandi and I , are having our discussion in pm and we have become friends. And we see each others point of view.:razz::-P:-o

[brandi 231]

seems a little heavy term to be used.

 

Omg, Conflict? LOL, you have got to be kidding, if people are going to assume something please assume the positive and not the negative. Only a good intention was there.

[E.D. man 691]

Brandi is becoming a sweetheart and if we ever meet she told me I could spank her :-P (ass with kisses ) lol

[Seymour 3970]

Brandi is becoming a sweetheart and if we ever meet she told me I could spank her :-P (ass with kisses ) lol

 

Yes - I/we sense a group hug coming on. :razz: CERB is a wonderful place !!

[mod 135639]

We only see the public end of things (I can not read PM's) so I just have to make sure no one takes the comments the wrong way. A good moderator nips problems in the butt before they become a problem whenever possible. But I am only human.

 

As for a review from me, that would be a big conflict of interest so that will never happen but thanks for the vote of confidence.

[Guest f***2f***]

Brandi is becoming a sweetheart and if we ever meet she told me I could spank her :-P (ass with kisses ) lol

 

Speaking from personal experience...it's a wonderful ass to cover!!:shock:

[kih 458]

Great discussion Dummpy!

 

It's no surprise that allegations or malicious rumors are surfacing for whatever motive. Its human nature and the industry is competitive.

 

However, there is always at least two different sides to a story and before I would pass judgment on a individual, I would at least learn both sides.

 

At the end of the day if the allegations or rumors turn out to be unfounded, persons spreading such nonsense have less credibility and in fact are tarnishing their own reputation.

[Toni. 100]

Dummpy,

 

Assumption is the mother of all fu*kers, and with malicious rumors like this I think the most important thing is that the people who matter will always see through it. Anyone who chooses to believe in them on that bases without any proof is clearly someone you don't want to be around. You are an amazing person and everyone who has met you and knows you knows exactly that.

love, t.

[capitalman 3861]

It's taken me a while, but I've read everything in this thread. Thanks to everyone for your opinions and insight and for sharing your knowledge.

 

I'm no expert but I do know this is a community and within this community we're all searching for something from each other. Love, sex, companionship, or maybe just laughter or a reason to hate someone. It's all here, we'll find what we want and you might get hurt along the way. The more you put yourself out there, the more chance you're going to get hurt.

 

Like when I post a recommendation about a lady I'm opening up about myself and what I did with her. As people read this they'll draw judgements about me and her. An SP might think "If he's seen that girl and that other girl, then I sure don't want to see him because they're trash (or unsafe or whatever)"

You know what I mean? That's part of the risk I take by participating in the community. Making the choice to participate also means making the choice to let others see a bit of me, come what may. I'm not saying the rumours are okay, they're not, but this is the kind of shit that happens around a place like this.

 

As others have said, we all just need to know who we are and what we want and stick to it. Misery loves company....people that are down and out will always want to bring you down too and the best defence to that is a good offence. Just my 2 cents, thanks.

[rick_falcon 911]

I have been away for a few weeks and am doing some catching up.

Wow! What a thread, but a really good one. There is really nothing I could add but I have a few comments.

 

I have been a member for a long time and I love this community. Fortunately, I have never been contacted with these rumours but I can understand the angriness that they can generate when they are directed at specific people in a derogatory way.

To this, yes it is important to verify the sources. And I agree with Cowboy Kenny and what he said.

I am a fan of his blog (as many of you are I am convinced) but what I admire most is his integrity. He exposes the fraudulent people and they get pissed at him. Why? Because he has proofs, with valid links to fake photos.

It's not just words in the air that he is inventing (like rumours are).

 

But it also true that CERB is an increasingly popular forum but, a little popular or a lot popular, you will always get jackasses that will only try to instigate trouble.

It's like when there is a riot; it's always the same people that are the instigators and they go from event to event, just to be the s**t disturbers that will wreak havoc.

Respected senior members have brought invaluable information for everyone to share and it is sad that some of them are being the target of shameful defamation.

To me, these members have become role models over time for newer members, who want to learn, who want to share and who want to become more active within this virtual community.

 

Lastly, as these jackasses that are only trying to cause trouble will never go away, I tip my hat to the Mod, who is doing a great job to keep everything under control.

[Guest *D E**a]

Sorry I will read through it all after I write this....see I post for Bbbj.....so I would be curious if I am "dirty" ..... I enjoy oral sex....I do take precautions and am tested monthly. I do not allow cim at all. I do not engage in intercourse without a condom...in today's world you have to be stupid to do this. Trust only goes so far and it works both ways.

[JoyfulC 132299]

I'll probably get flamed for commenting on this, but I've been in the business since the 1970s, and I must confess that I don't always get the rationale behind some SPs policies.

 

I agree, if a guy's breath is bad or he has an open coldsore, an SP isn't going to want to kiss him -- but she should make her reasons clear up front, and professionally give him the option to cancel without penalty. If she doesn't want to hurt his feelings, she can always make some other excuse to pass -- but don't take his money if you can't give him the services he's looking for.

 

I do bbbj, although I will use a condom if requested. (I find it unpleasant, though.) I have been lectured by others on this, and yet I can't help but notice that they insist on condoms for customers, yet will fall into bed with some character they met at a club just hours before, often not bothering with any condom for oral.

 

I have a friend who insists on condoms for oral, and yet, she makes exceptions if a guy is particularly "hot." There are two clients I'm thinking of that we've both seen regularly. One is "hot," the other is not. She doesn't use a condom with the hot one, and does with the not one. And yet, she knows neither use condoms for bj with me. So how exactly does that make sense?

 

This is one of the big problems with STDs. We tend to demonize them and the people who get them. But really, they're no different (from a disease perspective) from any other contagious disease. The only difference with STDs is the "shame factor" -- and much of this stems from the "infidelity factor." I'm married, and my husband knows what I do. So if I had to go home and tell him that I got the clap, it wouldn't be any different than if I had to go home and tell him I got strep throat or chicken pox. Because we don't consider my work "cheating" and because I haven't lied to him about anything, we would only worry about the actual disease part of it. But for someone who is married, if he had to tell his partner that she needed to be tested/treated for a disease, then not only would they have to deal with the disease, but also the breach of trust.

 

This whole demonization of STDs is particularly sad when it comes to young people. Because STDs are "bad" "dirty" contagious diseases, I think many young people are left thinking that only bad dirty mean people will give them to you. That wonderful, desirable, sexy person who seems to be crazy about you and wants you to meet his or her mom wouldn't/couldn't give you an STD, could they?? (or get you pregnant, for that matter)

 

The truth is that STDs are no more and in some cases less prevalent among prostitutes and johns than the general public. Why is this so? I suspect because we are sangfroid, dispassionate about our risks. Most of us (but not all apparently) make informed decisions not affected by things like love or trust.

 

I also believe that most people exaggerate the frequency of their testing. There are a couple considerations here:

 

1) The overwhelming majority of people infected with an STD are asymptomatic. Some of us may be more confident than we should be. I'll take a risk here and state for the record that, if nothing else, I'm sure I've been thoroughly exposed to HSV-1, the virus that causes coldsores. I've never had a cold sore, though!

 

2) A test is a lot like a snapshot. You can test negative at 2 PM on Friday, and pick something up on your way home from the clinic.

 

3) The consequences of an STD infection are not the same for all people. As I've already stated, if I had reason to believe I'd acquired an STD, it wouldn't be any more serious than acquiring a non-sexually transmitted contagious disease with a similar prognosis around my house. I've had many people lecture me about the importance of their wives not finding out or of *my* possibly infecting innocent unsuspecting wives -- but I don't even know these people. I did not take any vow to them, nor have I ever given them any assurances. Husbands must take active measures to protect their own partners, if they are still sexually active with them.

 

Taking the above into consideration, one really needs to decide for oneself what his or her policies should be. Respect others and never pressure anyone to do anything he or she isn't comfortable with.

 

As for SPs taking swipes at one another, sadly, yes, I can attest that it's true. Business hasn't been great lately, and people are starting to get nervous. One of my friends has made numerous comments suggesting that she thinks I'm getting more business because I give bbbj -- but as we see here on this board, there are as many guys who will avoid an SP who provides this service as will go with one. And besides, it's a silly point since I mostly work with regular clientele, some of whom have been coming back to me for ages -- I've been in Ottawa since 1989, and I have clients I've been seeing regularly here since then! She takes many new clients, but I don't -- and I have strong age and other preferences that limit me as well, that she isn't saddled with. Times are simply tough, and she's looking for someone to blame.

 

And just last month, someone reported some of the pics on my site that were being hosted by Picasa, and google removed them. I believe this was another SP (although probably not one I know -- I hope not, anyway!). The pics removed certainly weren't obscene, there wasn't even any full nudity, and similar or more erotic ones weren't flagged. I suppose it could have just been some troll, but it smacks of another SP. I also find that any ad I've ever placed on has been quickly flagged, even though I've never posted anything that violates the terms of use, and ads which are in obvious violation are allowed to stand. For about a year, there was some crazy chick who used to get her dumber-than-a-post boyfriend to call me up and make rude remarks, and when that didn't work, she'd grab the phone and start screaming that I was old and when was I going to retire? (I tell her "when people stop making appointments, of course!" ;-) )

 

I think we are in for a bit of a rough go with the economy over the next year or so. Gas prices last summer ate into the play money for most of us. Many of my clients are seniors and have been in shock since about mid-September. Recently, I'm starting to hear that some of my younger clients are getting laid-off. That not withstanding, right now, I think a large part of what we're dealing with is psychology -- not economy. There will be those who react to this without grace or integrity -- but we're all adults and we know it when we see it. I recommend just ignoring it.

 

..c..

[YoungStud 468]

Excellent points, Joyful. Especially about the testing and the "flexible" standards on uncovered oral. I've known women in the business who insist on covered BJs with clients, then do GB facials and cum swallowing with a bunch of "hot" guys they've just hooked up with casually for fun outside of work.

 

I think the latter is more a matter of personal "taste" as it were. Lol. ("Hot" guys have better tasting cum, or perhaps so it seems? lol) In any event, uncovered oral to completion is definitely statistically lower risk than uncovered vaginal or anal.

 

And risk can be a variable thing, based on each person's own experience. After more than 25 years, starting in high school, of sometimes risky (not always covered in every situation) behaviour, I've had crabs once and clamidia once. Just lucky perhaps. And nothing testing would have prevented. So I evaluate my risks accordingly. And I never ask anyone to take any they don't want to themselves.

 

So, indeed, bottom line, make, take and accept your own risks and don't force anybody to do what they don't feel comfortable with.

[Cowboy kenny 50799]

I'll probably get flamed for commenting on this...

..c..

 

Flamed, hardly look at all the love comin' your way. It's like I said in the other thread, your experience and wisdom are welcome here.

[d*mm*y 887]

I am still seeing this stuff, and I think it is getting worse. Some moron sent an SP that I am friends with a tampered chat log and a claim that I fuck crack hoes without a condom. Clearly my dance card must have suddenly fallen off and my job and home life must have come unglued cause now I have time to comb the streets looking for crack hoes!

 

I think there is as much BS as I can take. The idea behind the board is to post good experiences and help Hobbyists get together with SP's. And lately there seem to be many lurkers and A-holes who are trying to just stir up crap. I know that not everyone can afford to see the ladies and that communicating with them and getting there attention is the next best thing but really! Also if you are in the business knocking a competitor and ruining the cerb experience only brings down the business as a hole it will not increase your take. I think Nikki said it best, please grow up!

[Cowboy kenny 50799]

Ok this is absolute bull shit and the situation with Dummpy was the inspiration behind my original post yesterday about harrasment and backstabing.

 

Anyone who knows dummpy and I mean truly knows dummpy, knows that he is generous to a fault with not only cash, but his time, his knowledge and experience. He's a good guy and does not deserve this type of crap, as I seem to recall he is a valued member round these parts or does that not mean anything anymore.

 

Thankfully most of the providers out there smart enough to not take this type of malicious gossip as gospel and check their facts out before acting on it, but sadly there may be some who will jump to conclusions.

 

Ladies, if you get this type of rumour sent your way, consider the source and more so consider the motive for sending it to you. Guys if you're doing this to "win points" think again. When I get this stuff sent my way I usually think less of the sender and their ability to be discrete or sublte.

 

As I've explained to many, as CERB becomes more popular and membership grows so to does the potential for troublemakers and and A-holes to make their way in .

 

We are a tight knit community here and we WILL smoke out the offenders and sources of these rumours we've done it before and we'll do it again. Don't come in here threatning ladies and smearing memebers, you aren't doing anyone any favours. Seriously, grow up man.

[capitalman 3861]

Some people just need a little push in the right direction. Take myself for example. In the beginning I was a little bit stand offish and troublemaking. I got reprimanded a few times, put in my place by guys like Dummpy and Cowboy Kenny and I found myself thinking "Shit, these guys take all this very seriously...I should too." and I've cleaned up my act, or at least I make a large effort to do so. Once I did that, I realized I could actually get something positive from here and have some fun and enjoyment.

 

So hopefully these characters are listening and will shape up if they want to be part of this great community....otherwise they'll just drop by the wayside and be forgotten about, left alone and bored looking for somewhere else to try and fit in, without much luck.

[whatsup 11893]

Ok this is absolute bull shit and the situation with Dummpy was the inspiration behind my original post yesterday about harrasment and backstabing.

 

A great post indeed.

 

Anyone who knows dummpy and I mean truly knows dummpy, knows that he is generous to a fault with not only cash, but his time, his knowledge and experience. He's a good guy and does not deserve this type of crap, as I seem to recall he is a valued member round these parts or does that not mean anything anymore.

Dummpy is most certainly a Valued Member.

- I know that I have appreciated his efforts on this board and in PMs

 

Thankfully most of the providers out there smart enough to not take this type of malicious gossip as gospel and check their facts out before acting on it, but sadly there may be some who will jump to conclusions.

 

Ladies, if you get this type of rumour sent your way, consider the source and more so consider the motive for sending it to you. Guys if you're doing this to "win points" think again. When I get this stuff sent my way I usually think less of the sender and their ability to be discrete or sublte.

 

As I've explained to many, as CERB becomes more popular and membership grows so to does the potential for troublemakers and and A-holes to make their way in .

 

We are a tight knit community here and we WILL smoke out the offenders and sources of these rumours we've done it before and we'll do it again. Don't come in here threatning ladies and smearing memebers, you aren't doing anyone any favours. Seriously, grow up man.

 

As a tight knit community and if we work collaboratively, we will eliminate the offenders.

 

 

To whom ever you are you really are an annoying disturbance on this board.

So back off, fuck off and get off you'll be happier in the end.

[mod 135639]

Again, this is just going to encourage them more. Report these people to me instead of complaining about them in public and calling them out. Too negative too!

 

If someone is causing a problem in a THREAD or a PM just click the REPORT POST icon and this will flag it for me.

 

No one here will get flamed for anything. If you notice someone SLANDERING, FIGHTING, CALLING OUT, SPREADING RUMORS, ETC... FLAG THEM

 

Calling them out like this will only show them that they are getting to you and you are proving to them that the efforts they are exhausting are having effects here.

 

If it happens in CHAT just copy the log to me in a PM and I WILL DEAL WITH THEM.

 

I can BAN THEM if you tell me PRIVATELY who they are.