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This morning while I drink my coffee and read the boards here, I?m struck by how many complaints we have about the guys who take advantage of some aspect of our services and then treat us badly. There are active discussions about men who: Try to negotiate or bargain clearly-stated non-negotiable fees Try to pay less than the agreed fee after they arrive Try to get services that were not agreed on before the date Complain about our screening questions Don?t bother to take a shower, brush their teeth or trim their nails before seeing us Assume that we're likely to rob them Threaten to write bad reviews and/or aren?t believed when they write good ones Insult us, our need for safety and even our looks when we don?t give in to what they demand No one is forced to read our ads and websites, look at our photos, contact us, discuss our services with us, or meet with us. It?s all voluntary and initiated by the client. The client has needs, feelings, preferences and curiosity, but why do so many refuse to take responsibility for themselves? What they express as anger, self-righteous indignation and personal entitlement is really projected self-hatred. I want to sit these men down and say: If you don?t want to see a paid companion, don?t do it. If you decide to seek out a companion, that's your decision. What you want is not what everyone else may want. That?s usually a wonderful thing. Recognize that we?re not like cheap candy that you can buy daily. We?re more like fine dining to be enjoyed occasionally. Plan accordingly. If someone?s prices are too high for you, either wait until you can afford her, or find someone else. Meanwhile, don't blame her for your lack of funds. Recognize that she charges what the market will bear. That means that there are plenty of others who can afford to see her. Always be polite and considerate. No matter what. Even if you feel confused, disappointed or insulted, be polite. Remember that companions are human beings, just like you. We have needs, desires, dreams and things we?re worried about or afraid of, just as you do. We will protect both your health and our own. Fair is fair. If you're worried about your safety, know that she's concerned about her safety, too. No matter who or how important you are or think you are, the one who is taking the most risks is always the companion. Always. Relax.

If you do soem research on this in here you will see it has been debated many times before, even MOD made a few commnets on the issus. GFE is a style of service not a type of service. 2 different things all together. Over the years I have met SPs that do give BBBJ and in no way I would describe them as GFE. As a matter of fact some ladies was quite mechanical and in a rush to be done. On the other hand I have met quite a few ladies who give CBJ but are very GFE. Non rush service and they reallly care about me not just about the money I hand them out. One of my favorites SP, does provide GFE service and she is the one that I see most often. I would say she has been a great friend and if I had to make a choice ane have to limit myself to seeing only one SP she is certainly at the top of my list. If in your opinion GFE includes BBBJ then you should have mentioned you wanted this type of service. You should not be commenting about the SP when there is no place that defines GFE as including BBBJ. As a client you should not assume things and if you want a specific service ask when you book.

This is an extraordinary thread. Thank you to all. It struck me however, that the title has "Gentlemen" in it. If one is truly a gentleman, much of this advice would not be necessary. Perhaps, we need a "finishing" school for all the lads who have not quite become accustomed to the proper ways of treating people, men and women, but especially our delightful courtesans who care to our fragile needs.

In my view GFE does NOT include anything unsafe like BBBJ as much as it does NOT include unprotected FS that most girlfriends will provide. Please note the letter 'E' at the end stands for experience. In my view GFE includes services provided by a lady who willingly provides emotional aspects of a having a girlfriend (conversing, kissing, hugging, cuddling, dancing, sharing drinks, etc.) as well as SAFE physical aspects (LFK/DFK, DATY and protected FS). It is important to me that in every encounter the safety of the lady as well as myself to come first and foremost, and for that reason I personally never ask for BBBJ and don't consider that as a part of GFE.

Actually in Canada as long as you are not in a public place you can openly discuss sex for money. Some ladies prefer not to and some don't realize that it is perfectly legal for them to do this. You can also discuss particulars about sex for money in private but if you discuss this in a hotel lobby, a hallway, a public coffee shop, etc.. your in deep trouble! If however you work in a brothel (including a massage spa or even a stripclub that allows sexual acts) it than becomes risky to discuss sexual acts with people even in private as the acts are not illegal but working in a brother is very much illegal - and you are admitting to breaking the law. Prostitution in Canada is legal (I know some of you don't beleive this but are too lazy to go read the law and learn this for yourself - the internet is your friend spend a few hours and do some homework)! What is not legal is solicitation (discussing sex in a public place) - the internet is not considered a "Place" so it is not illegal to discuss sex acts online. A magazine or print ad is also not a "place" so you can make ads explicit for services if the medium would allow you to BUT if your breaking the law by working in a brothel, underage, pimping, etc.. than your discussion in private is still bad as it's evidence that you are breaking the law. So... if the lady does incalls (Even is she is the only one working from that location) she probably will not discuss details. The law tends to ignore the ladies who work privately in residential area's but are very interested to know about commercial places such as spa's, stripclubs and actual brothels. Let's face it, the lady working by herself in a incall location is more safe than doing an outcall so forcing them to do outcalls to keep it legal is not what that law was intended for. The law is againt pimps, brothels, streetwalkers, underage girls/guys and all the really bad stuff. Drugs is also a big thing they watch for and discussion of any kind involving drugs would bring unwanted attention.

The lady was right to be upset with you. The term GFE does NOT imply any services. It is a style of service. You did not ASK for a BBBJ you assumed that GFE included this (and you were WRONG). You owe this lady a big apology and money! Most people here would agree that leaving and taking the money you agreed to pay her for the time was very wrong and since it was a mistake on your part you should repay her for her time or you are stealing from her. I would suspect your number and name to show up in the bad date lists because of this. This is unacceptable.

hey FO and everyone else!! i have been a member here for awhile but don't have alot of time so don't get over here much, i will try to get over here more... i'm glad people enjoyed the doc. the ivanhoe pub featured in the movie is where we signed the incorporatio documents for canada's first sex worker cooperative and where we held the first meetings for the sex industry association we are proposing. the BC Coalition also used to meet there on a regular basis and still do when we can as well we have entertained famous sex workers org's there like stella from montreal when they visit vancouver. it's located on the edge of vancouver's downtown east side and i have been going there for 20 years. they have a sign on the wall "FTWA" (flesh trade workers association-the men at the pub named it and they wanted fighters, butchers and tattoo workers to be able to join too-lol)and a newspaper cover of when we were incorporated as the coop that says "Sex Inc"- things are progressing here on the west coast and we are really gaining ground in the vancouver lower mainland. i am on 15 committees including; - SIWSAG- Vancouver Police, sex woker support services and sex workers working together to improve the safety of the sex industry community and decrease the harms caused by and during enforcement - Living In Community- City of vancouver, business improvement associations, health, support services, neighbourhood houses, provincial government,sex industry workers all working together to balance perspectives on the sex industry. Trade secrets advisory- designing occupational health and safety training for the sex industry as te foundation of our industry association as recommended in the "labour on the margins" report. International sex work conference planning committee- some of you may remember stella's XXX forum, i was there and cried everyday. we are planning a conference for vancouver next may and will be inviting 100 sex industry community memebers from across canada to attend- we will be finding funding, paying honoraria, hotels, flights etc. we hope to be able to come together as a national body, agree on some basic terms of reference, aquire the committment of all of you to change and self governance and work on human rights together so people could return to their respective constituencies and begin to organize on a local level but we would all be sharing a common thread/objective/rules/ standards that would allow us to be the national industry association but with real localized perspectives from all stakholders included at the "table" our plans include business owners and consumers, inclusion is the key. 2010 impacts committee VPD policy procedure mannual revision committee Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Conference Community Policing Partnership Car..... if you go the wccsip dot ca web site you will find the "labour on the margins report" as well as under the news section a more detailed description of our recent activities. please feel free to contact me with any questions or concerns, we welcome any and all input. also, if you would like information about how to begin to work with the systems in charge of protection we would love to share whatever we can to improve conditions for the sex industry and stop the ever increasing undermining/ destabilzing/enforcement against our industry. love susieXXXO

I usually leave it at home and just bring the basics with me. The SP's I generally see are very trustworthy, so I don't believe I have anything to worry about, but I usually take precautions just in case. It really depends how confortable you are with the lady, some of the indy's I know I can trust, but if I am meeting a lady for the first time then I tend to be a bit more cautious. Just wise to do so, never take any chances.

No wallet - I have a billfold, one credit card and one ID. I assume little and expect people to behave properly. I try not to go to places where I will be robbed and if I am, well there are people that take care of those things. My experience has been good - I listen to respected sources and do not take risks that do not need to be taken. If I get that feeling in my stomach - I call and say "the place is not what I expected and I am no longer interested" and leave a token