donny96069 100 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 Most of MA have photos, descriptions, and etc. However, it is normal that when you go and meet her at the fist time, you find she is not the type you like. So what we can do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 I believe the proper protocol is to politely decline, but pay the lady a cancellation fee...she did after all block off her time for your appointment, time she could have better used for a paying client. And for the lady, be a MA or SP, this is their livelihood, not their hobby RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paradise Spa 24019 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 See someonelse next time :) We are all different....hobbiest and ma's and not everyone clicks with everyone...this is life...no biggy or hard feelings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
donny96069 100 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 For SPA like Paradise, since we have choice, the situation should be better. But for the independent MA, do they accept a cancellation fee and usually how much? or can that turn to a normal session with the door fee something? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Old Dog 179138 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 ... or you could say, "What the hell. I am here, let's do it!" You might just be pleasantly surprised about what your type really is! 11 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel's Touch Ottawa 22561 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 Ask attendant upfront what any cancellation fee is prior to booking....then from there you have 2 choices pay cancellation fee or do as OD suggests have the experience and see where it takes you....as I say try it once if you don't like it don't see her again but at least you know you tried....you will never be left wondering how the experience might of been :) For SPA like Paradise, since we have choice, the situation should be better. But for the independent MA, do they accept a cancellation fee and usually how much? or can that turn to a normal session with the door fee something? 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s**nflute Report post Posted January 12, 2012 I believe the proper protocol is to politely decline, but pay the lady a cancellation fee...she did after all block off her time for your appointment, time she could have better used for a paying client. And for the lady, be a MA or SP, this is their livelihood, not their hobbyRG VERY well said, the cancellation fee is certainly the way to do it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted January 12, 2012 Ask attendant upfront what any cancellation fee is prior to booking....then from there you have 2 choices pay cancellation fee or do as OD suggests have the experience and see where it takes you....as I say try it once if you don't like it don't see her again but at least you know you tried....you will never be left wondering how the experience might of been :) I can see etiquette wise asking up front what a cancellation fee should be, but being the cock eyed optimist that I am, I book every encounter not with the intent of wondering how much to pay if I cancel...instead I go looking forward to meeting a new lady, and letting the encounter unfold naturally And so far, (except for 4 bad encounters over a total of 20+ encounters since July 2010) I've have had encounters with wonderful ladies that were not just memories, but memorable too. As for the 4 bad ones, I chalk it up to a learning experience, and on the plus side, they made me appreciate all the great encounters I've had, and will have Should a prospective client cancel a appropriate cancellation fee should be paid (determined by the lady) with no complaint. But like everyone is suggesting, see the lady, you will likely be pleasantly surprised, and may even find a lady you would repeat with A long winded rambling RG 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s**nflute Report post Posted January 13, 2012 I can see etiquette wise asking up front what a cancellation fee should be, but being the cock eyed optimist that I am, I book every encounter not with the intent of wondering how much to pay if I cancel...instead I go looking forward to meeting a new lady, and letting the encounter unfold naturally And so far, (except for 4 bad encounters over a total of 20+ encounters since July 2010) I've have had encounters with wonderful ladies that were not just memories, but memorable too. As for the 4 bad ones, I chalk it up to a learning experience, and on the plus side, they made me appreciate all the great encounters I've had, and will have Should a prospective client cancel a appropriate cancellation fee should be paid (determined by the lady) with no complaint. But like everyone is suggesting, see the lady, you will likely be pleasantly surprised, and may even find a lady you would repeat with A long winded rambling RG I applaud RG's comments in the previous and present post. If the lady is not to your liking, does it mean every lady likes you?? how do the MP / SP feels when they have a client is not to their liking, and it's been a slow week!! The physical appearance of both parties have a great impact on the encounter and at times we get judgemental while we are looking for that fantasy "spinner" look or the "tall dark and handsome guy" I have seen MA's and SP's some people would walk away from because of their appearances are only skin deep, and I returned because they showed a genuine interest in making you happy. Does my appearance make some providers go "GAGA UGLY" probably, I am sure some MP or SP would rather give the guy $20. just to "go away thank you" "but it has not stopped either of us from having a good time. YES first impressions are always important, BUT at the end of the day as long both parties are clean, respectful and sane, everyone will have a good time. Some guys have a tendency to look for the "spinner" look, but will these ladies give you the best "bang" to make you smile? I work both ways!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 So, to all of you folks who would walk away, a question: how would you feel if you showed up to meet someone who took one look at you and decided she didn't want to see you after all? It'd hurt, no? For me, the financial side of things is irrelevant here. Cancellation fee or no cancellation fee, I'd consider it spectacularly rude to turn around and walk away. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billybob 20128 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 So, to all of you folks who would walk away, a question: how would you feel if you showed up to meet someone who took one look at you and decided she didn't want to see you after all? It'd hurt, no? For me, the financial side of things is irrelevant here. Cancellation fee or no cancellation fee, I'd consider it spectacularly rude to turn around and walk away. I realize that this community strives for positivity, I am not trying to be a negative person but I would like to pose a different position on your comments. If I showed up to meet a lady and after a brief discussion she said to me, you know what i don't feel comfortable with you and I would like you to leave. Yes, I would feel like a complete loser, but most ladies do, and should, reserve the right to decline an encounter. So I think both parties should have the right for whatever reason not to continue with their encounter. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel's Touch Ottawa 22561 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 Another view point....In my experience if someone did not want to see me I was okay with it :) Why? Because I rather someone see me that wanted to see me NOT just take one for the TEAM ha ha......If a client was not feeling it with me I encourage him to see someonelse because I rather him be happy and me as the ma not be uncomfortable during the session because he was taking one for the team :) I hope this makes sense! 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 (edited) Well I'll throw another two cents worth in here. The OP's question was Most of MA have photos, descriptions, and etc. However, it is normal that when you go and meet her at the fist time, you find she is not the type you like. So what we can do? Now I take it from reading that, and maybe I'm reading his post wrong, but it sounds like upon initial meeting the ladies looks are not what he likes...and the judgement of type/likes is based upon looks alone. Well an encounter is at least for me, more than looks, and more than "the menu" (which if that is important to you, well you'll never know if you cancel out), but most important, is if you click, have chemistry if you will. I guess what I'm in a round about way of saying, you really won't know if the lady is your type unless you give the encounter a chance. And going into an encounter with one foot out the door so to speak to me isn't giving the encounter or the lady a chance. And one other thing, the four bad encounters, well three of the four ladies were, (by what would be general criteria that is used to judge attractiveness, hope that is worded right) beautiful, yet they were not from my experience, good encounters, actually horrible is the word that comes to mind. As they say, beauty is only skin deep, but true beauty, well it transcends just looks, and all the ladies that I had good encounters with, well they are all beautiful But yes, you do have the right to cancel, keeping in mind giving the lady proper compensation Me, like I said in an earlier post, I'm a cock eyed optimist, I'll never pay a cancellation fee, because I go into every encounter looking forward to how it will unfold. But that's me RG Edited January 14, 2012 by r__m__g_uy inserted a thought Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billybob 20128 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 I completely understand what you are saying RG, the only point I was trying to make was, as uncomfortable a situation it may be, each party should be able to reserve the right to "cancel" the encounter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 Most of MA have photos, descriptions, and etc. However, it is normal that when you go and meet her at the fist time, you find she is not the type you like. So what we can do? The photos, descriptions, etc are the things you use to assure yourself she is going to be the best possible match to being the type that you like. If you find that even with the information provided you are still having troubles finding any types that you like, then you may, as suggested, have to find a way to like the one you are with lol. It is entirely possible that with the information you are using to make your choice, you are artificially enhancing the details given to you with higher expectations the real person has no way of meeting. There is a certain amount of trial and error, but with an open heart and mind, provided the lady is accomodating, friendly and dedicated to providing you with her best, then you will always enjoy yourself regardless whether you think she met your expectations or not. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 I completely understand what you are saying RG, the only point I was trying to make was, as uncomfortable a situation it may be, each party should be able to reserve the right to "cancel" the encounter. And I don't disagree, you have the right to cancel...keeping in mind the lady is entitled to a cancellation fee I should add one thing, guys who end up becoming chronic cancellers will find themselves gaining a reputation...and not the good kind Me, I won't cancel, because I won't know what the lady is like untill I meet her, and the encounter unfolds RG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billybob 20128 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 I agree with the previous 2 posts, first, there is some trial and error with meeting the ladies, and second, personally, I would never cancel. I would continue with the encounter and decide whether or not there would be a second encounter. Obviously if you have a reputation with cancelling you would have a hard time booking other ladies. Not to sound like a broken record, I just think both parties should have the option of cancelling the encounter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phaedrus 209521 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 I realize that this community strives for positivity, I am not trying to be a negative person but I would like to pose a different position on your comments. Disagreement is not the same as negativity :) Have at it! If I showed up to meet a lady and after a brief discussion she said to me, you know what i don't feel comfortable with you and I would like you to leave. Yes, I would feel like a complete loser, but most ladies do, and should, reserve the right to decline an encounter. So I think both parties should have the right for whatever reason not to continue with their encounter. Absolutely... I'm certainly not advocating that (quite apart from anything else, the ladies have their security to consider; I'm sure there are times with the alarm bells go off and they *have* to start thinking about that over and above anything else). And if the two of you really don't get on, then fine - but in that situation I'd have thought it'd be obvious to both parties that there was a problem. What I was really getting at was the situation - and I know it happens - where guys show up, and just decide, on first setting eyes on the lady, that they're no longer interested, based purely on looks. Yes, we can all protest that *we* would never be so shallow... but it happens; far more often than it should, I suspect. After all, ladies post pics; it's rare for one of us guys to show up with no clue about what we're about to see when the door is opened (and yes, I know fake pics exist, and this is one of the reasons they're so frowned upon). We really should have done our research. But the ladies don't get that. And still, I've never heard of a guy being told to go away because he was too fat, or too ugly, or too anything else (I've never had it happen to me, and I'm certainly no Adonis) - but I have no doubt that there are guys who bail on the ladies for equally shallow reasons, and it's those people my previous post was aimed at. The fact of being a paying customer does *not* give you a license to treat other people with contempt. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billybob 20128 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 And still, I've never heard of a guy being told to go away because he was too fat, or too ugly, or too anything else (I've never had it happen to me, and I'm certainly no Adonis) - but I have no doubt that there are guys who bail on the ladies for equally shallow reasons, and it's those people my previous post was aimed at. The fact of being a paying customer does *not* give you a license to treat other people with contempt. This makes perfect sense, I would hope that the guys you are referring to are the rare exception. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest s**nflute Report post Posted January 14, 2012 (edited) I realize that this community strives for positivity, I am not trying to be a negative person but I would like to pose a different position on your comments. If I showed up to meet a lady and after a brief discussion she said to me, you know what i don't feel comfortable with you and I would like you to leave. Either that person has an attitude problem.......or the alarm bells were set off because they feel threatened. Edited January 14, 2012 by s**nflute add comments Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sensual Erin 33928 Report post Posted January 14, 2012 This is an interesting thread and am so pleased to see a logical perspective to this rare occurrence. I would like to add that as an Independent MA, my discretion would go out the window if a client voiced his concerns over what we discussed and what was expected in private correspondence at my door. If a cancellation fee were mentioned, even worse! No conversations of any sort in regards to a session take place at my door as I have neighbors. It hasn't happened yet and if it did, I would feel obliged to let my other Independent ladies know of the indiscretion. If you're basing your decision on looks, please don't ever put a lady that you developed trust with to invite you to her private location at risk by mentioning anything at her door. It's common sense! 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whiteman 14028 Report post Posted January 19, 2012 There used to be a golden rule several years ago (decades actually), that if you didn't find someone to be of your type, just tell them, and give them $20 for the cancellation fee. I'm not sure if that's still the going rate anymore, it's been years since I've had to use it. First of all, I've been at the hobby long enough now that I can pretty much determine if I want to go through with it or not over the phone. No one's time is wasted, because I simply don't make an appointment if I don't "feel it". Second, as someone else has mentioned in this thread, just go through with it, it might be better than you think. Over the years, I've found that drop-dead gorgeous looks don't determine how good your experience is going to be -- usually far from it. I've found some amazing gems of people I would have normally said were not my type. It's not just a sign of maturity, it's also something that's to your advantage in the long-run to be a bit flexible with your "type". Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Qwerty420 1067 Report post Posted January 25, 2012 You made the choice to see her and book her time. So if her pics were real i say you should pay the provide like you agreed on when you booked. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stanjohn 488 Report post Posted February 4, 2012 In all my years, there's only been one instance where I've walked out of an establishment and that was because the gal I booked with was suddenly unavailable and the "replacement" was very pushy to the point of becoming demanding! I've had a few bad experiences in the past and have learned some lessons, I don't know if I am approaching this in the correct way or not (I'm open to any suggestions). If I get there and at first meeting the gal doesn't seem to be what I expected I won't leave, I'll go for the massage and gauge how they are once in the room. A good massage along with all that goes with it like chatting, things in common and hitting it off and I'll carry on with the rest of the experience. I'm sure many a hidden gem has been found this way. A bad or rough massage and I'll just say thank you for the massage and pay the room fee plus 20 and carry on my way. Cheers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ulixestrojan 3757 Report post Posted February 5, 2012 Great thread. This conversation reminds me of the old Willy Nelson lyric: "I've never gone to bed with an ugly woman but I've woken up with a few. At 2 o'clock she was a 10 but at 10 o'clock she was a 2. In Ottawa, the only reasons I have to cancel is when there are clear personal safety issues (guys with guns in the living room - happened once) or clear signs of needle drug use. In both instances run as fast as you can. Otherwise, take one for the team. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites