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I for one, was never offended by the use of the word "cougar" to describe an attractive older woman. I realize that after awhile, it denoted a 40+ lady chasing a 25- man. Originally, I think it was used to describe sexy, sassy, Sex in the City type ladies. Then MILF became the term...but mother I'd like to ....does not accurately describe the ladies that the term is used for.... I say bring back the Cougar as it was originally intended. A beautiful woman, of a certain age, who looks after herself, takes pride in her appearence and is un-questionably sexy!!! Not all 40+ sexy ladies are seeking the attentions of younger men! Mature ladies of Canada; unite and fight for our right to be awesomly ravishing! (I completely apologize for any spelling and gramatical errors that may have occured during this, my recent rant!)

If there was a misunderstanding, BCB was the author of this own fate. If he misunderstood Carrie, he chose to, because then he'd have to admit perhaps her post had merit and he wasn't about to do that. He wanted what he wanted and he wanted everyone else to agree with him, otherwise he was taking his ball and going home. (Which the MOD most dutifully did for him). He started off with a certain definition of what he was looking for which was basically snuggling. Then he threw in the comment about "in these recessionary times", implying that he was doing us a favour by creating this new "niche in the market" (borrowed the term from another SP). Like, hey buddy, that's up to the ladies to define what they consider to be "social" or "regular time". For example, guys like Pistol Pete may be a jokster, but you never hear of him questioning or quibbling over a lady's rates. He's a respectful, not manipulative, so that's why if he made a comment like maybe we should pay him, we would probably laugh, not be offended, because there isn't that underlying hidden agenda going on to get something for nothing. Then BCB's definition went from snuggling to something totally different including nudity and more intimate/physical touching than was originally described. physical contact..thus blurring the lines even more. Then he implies that perhaps he's so good, that we if if went further, we SHOULD pay him. This was where the train derailed. I believe this is why people got pissed off and felt like he was manipulating...not onlyfor the service he was trying to acquire at a cheaper rate, but also trying to steer the thread back to him by attacking anyone who challenged him. Although perhaps a bit harsh, once made to look like the buffoon he was, he then promptly attacked Carrie back and more fiercely while obviously trying to maintain his "I'm such a good guy image" intact. But nobody was buying it by then, including myself. So then he went crying to the MOD, oh, Carrie hit me in the sandbox and has turned all the other kids against me. Boo hoo hoo. BCB derailed the the train and then blamed everyone else on board for the mess.

Cartoon version: Cougar: A Cougar is a 40+ stiletto favouring, leopard print spandex wearing hormonally spiked she-thing that wants to screw your balls out through your nose if you're unfortunate enough to be male, and just out of high-school. A Cougar can also describe scary spider grandmas like Madonna and soon to be Trailerpark trash Psycho-Coug: Britanny Spears. Definitely have their role in modern society. They set a prime example for the youthful girls who just can't hope to compete with the Cougar`s keenly refined preditory instinct. MILF: A MILF is your neighbour's high heel, tight skirt wearing wife (and mother of your best friend) who is coincidently home alone during the same day that you've called in sick to work. She happens to be outside at the same time you are and innocently asks you if you could take out some HEAVY several somethings from the garage to the curb. When you're finished and you're sweating and wiping your brow, she thoughtfully brings out a cold glass of lemonade. You clear your forehead with the cold glass and take several large gulps. Adams apple moving up and down with each swallow. You flash a brilliant smile when you hand the glass back to her manicured fingers. She smiles alluringly in return, tilts her head and asks coyly if you would like to take a nice cooling shower. She has some fresh towels set out too. "Oh dear," she says, one of the packages you moved left a stain on your shirt. "Let me wash that out for you.." she says. You obligingly follow her into the house. I personally don't know any (damn!).

I can't believe I read the whole thing. :shock: I'll throw my penny in, it's not quite worth 2cents but hey anyone still reading might appreciate a little extra coin for their efforts thus far. I believe a part of the issue is that there is an assumption that all ladies provide the same types of services but the reality is we don't. Some ladies offer very specific sexual services as a main priority and others place the focus on the companionship and some comfortably go between the two. They are two very different business models and two very different providers and asking one to provide the other is the same as going into a Tim Hortons and asking for a steak, likely you are going to be stared at by a confused counter person and if you do receive your steak you won't be happy with it. Now it's believable that someone from another country may not know what's on the menu at a Tims and therefor they are asking simply because they don't know any different and asking is the only way they are going to find what they are really looking for, which I believe a lot of clients fall into this category. They don't have the industry knowledge to understand that not all companions are the same and don't know where to go for a specific style of service (or why they are not receiving what they want from the ladies they see). Many women don't provide cuddling, outside encounters, etc. they prefer to offer a no strings 30min (or 1 hour) date, they are comfortable with the parameters and they enjoy it. Other ladies offer a slightly more rounded experience, it's about building a connection, talking, teasing and engaging the client on levels beyond the physical. Both these types of companion have a market and there are many clients that prefer one over the other. One isn't better than the other, both are equally hard work. It reads to me that the OP typically seeks the former type of companion, someone that doesn't engage in the "GFE" date (unless you define GFE as a type of sexual service, BBBJ, DFK, etc.) but he's finding that lacking now and would like a little more variety, a connection, a real date feel. Perhaps the thread might have gone a little better if someone had explained that ladies that advertise as companion (courtesan, etc.) are more likely to offer that type of experience and the various other ways to determine what type of companion a lady is (keywords, rate structure, etc). The ladies that offer companion services generally have already structured their rates to include "out of bed time" as that is the bulk of service that they provide. Now there are many ladies that bridge the gap and offer both styles of services but not one of the ones I know believes that one is less work than the other, they are just different types of services. I may enjoy going to a movie, having dinner out, etc. but being professional about it means I put a lot of effort into my date, I dress appropriately, I make sure that I've shaved the legs, put on a little makeup, etc. All of that takes time and to make it appear effortless is even more work and expense. If I am working then I make an effort that I do not in my private life, when I visit a friend I dress comfortable, I don't worry about the chipped nails or the hair that is frizzy from the rain but when you are a client I do, it's just good business sense to put your best foot forward. So when someone asks me (and all ladies have heard this before) if you're not doing anything anyway why not make some money instead you are asking me to work. Everyone in every job enjoys having a bit of downtime, so why don't I choose to work when I'm off, for the same reason everyone else does, it's my time to relax and enjoy my private life. When I agree to work then no matter what I am doing whether it's a wine tasting or a few hours locked in a hotel room I am still "on" and making sure that I am representing myself in the best way I can which is work. For those that are client facing in careers they might appreciate this, when a client (especially a new one) asks you out to dinner on a Saturday night you will often hum and haw over it. It's not that you don't like the client, it's not that you don't like eating, it's that you are required to represent your business which requires your "professional image" and you are now unable to enjoy a meal with your college buddies, your hockey team or just relax in your underwear drinking beer and watching the game.

Since I began this hobby, it's clear for me that when I ask an appt. from an "escort" or a "courtisan", it is to be with her, all her, and I pay for her time. And I always like the idea to pay at the beginning, so the "business" aspect of the encounter is behind us, putting all the possibilities in front of us. Calculating, negociating, having X Y Z expectations, having some goals, imposing a certain level of performance, are, for me, a killer of the encounter. For me, the real luxury is to let this special time with this special "courtisan" go with my feeling of the moment; sometime to have torrid sex, sometime a relaxing and cosy moment with a glass of wine, good music and a deep conversation, or ... who knows ? So the issue of the rates or donations rely on the free choice of the lady.

While the OP had the right to request a particular service i found some of his posts offensives;I don't think it is fair to decide what is less or more work as activities... I personaly find some gents personality quite annoying and spending many hours snuggling or watching a movie might be more work for me emotionally &mentally than full gfe service.It is not because sex it is not involve the time spent is less valuable I personaly side on Emma post as someone pay for my time..not the service...So it doesnt matter if we play scrabble,strip-tease,wrestling ,have full service during our time together it remain the same rate. VJ

I personally think it was just a misunderstanding on all sides. I don't know if anybody deserves a time out, but you're the mod :) I don't think bcb quite understood what Carrie was trying to say, so chose to get offended instead. I did not find his original few posts offensive, but I can completely see how they may have been misunderstood. Every girl works differently, and has different rates for things. What he was asking for is just as sexual as my massage rate. However my massage rate is my social rate, seeing as how recession or not, I am busy enough I don't need to make less than $150/hr. Additional Comments: I personally think it was just a misunderstanding on all sides. I don't know if anybody deserves a time out, but you're the mod :) I don't think bcb quite understood what Carrie was trying to say, so chose to get offended instead. I did not find his original few posts offensive, but I can completely see how they may have been misunderstood. Every girl works differently, and has different rates for things. What he was asking for is just as sexual as my massage rate. However my massage rate is my social rate, seeing as how recession or not, I am busy enough I don't need to make less than $150/hr.

I'd say lack of certain sexual services, seeing as it was stated that things such as being partially undressed, kissing and fondling would still be expected; which to me are sexual services. In my opinion, I don't think a lower rate should be expected or asked for just because there is no actual intercourse which is essentially the only thing that is eliminated in this scenario. Many SPs charge for their time, not specific services. If a gentleman wants to use his time with an SP to just cuddle, great! But don't expect to pay less for it. That being said, at the end of the day, every lady has the right to choose what they will, and what they won't, do and how much they will charge for their services. They should never be made to feel like they should charge less than what they are asking because of the elimination of certain sex acts.

"Ladies: I'm ready NOW, first one here wins...aaaaand GO!" "Best ways to get BJ-milage that isn't offered by a lady at a SC?"

Award entitled... "Best DATY, a legend in my own mind" And before I get ragged on...no I am not talking about anyone in particular!!! Just for fun; remember?