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I just finished re-reading the excellent thread by JuliasUndies, "Let's talk about respect."... http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=45633 ...and it made me think about something. This is a damned fine web site. I'll say it again. This is a damned fine web site. It's full of interesting people, men and women. It's a great meeting place rife with members who exhibit class, intelligence, grace, kindness, empathy, creativity. I imagine that it takes an incredible amount of time and effort to run this whole thing and I just wanted to thank everyone who is involved in the operations of it all. I don't know if it's one person or a team but here it is... Thank you. I appreciate what you've done here in the past and what you're doing here presently. Doc.

Cerb has definately been a positive influence in my life as well. Ten years ago I would never have even entertained the aspect of becoming a hobbiest. Since then the vibrant woman I fell in love with and am still deeply in love with has fallen ill to a condition that puts her in constant pain. People around us seem to have turned a blind eye to her condition and because it is ongoing no longer care. Don't get me wrong the last thing we need or want is sympathy but understanding and caring now and again would be nice. When on cerb the friends I have made and confided in have been a real support when I needed it. You know who you are and I thank you. The beautiful women I have met allow me to experience the raw passion I so need from time to time and considering when we first meet as strangers it's mutual respect for each other that sets the tone for all we do.

The overwhelming majority of my clients are also wonderful people! I very much dislike the stereotype that men who see sex workers must be pedophiles, rapists, no respect for women, etc. From my experiences, nothing could be further from the truth! I get much more respect from the clients I meet than I would from any bar in town.

The stigma goes both ways. While protraying the men who see SPs as leaches and craven misfits (and make no mistake, I'm sure there is a minority who fits that description), the women themselves are often portrayed as addicts and broken, abnormal people. Most of the women I have met through CERB are smart, witty and charming and I have even had the opportunity to call some friends. And they have treated me with more genuine respect and sincerity than a lot of women in the "outside" world in social situations.

What you consider abuse, isn't what another would consider to be abuse. Many people would say that prostitution is abuse of your body. I even remember learning at church that your body is the temple of the holy spirit, and masturbation is abuse of your body, the temple of God. It's your body and what you consider abuse is your choice to make alone! It's not up to you to judge. If a woman (or man) wants to have numerous sexual partners with or without protection, that is their choice alone to make and it's not up to us to judge their choices. All we can do is educate people. Making a poor choice doesn't make you a morally inferior person. I've made bad choices in my past, we all have! I also find it sexist that you're going after women to "shut their legs." It takes two to tango and men are just as responsible as women when sexual activity or a pregnancy occurs.

I've said it before (and heard it before too), the difference between free sex and paying for it, free sex ends up lots more expensive in the end RG

Do you remember your first exposure to erotica? Someone's movie collection? Magazines? I recall being in my early teens and stumbling across a relative's stash of playboys. Needless to say it caught my attention. Those days of different lingerie styles, body types, hairstyles. Not saying those days need to come back, just thinking back. Your thoughts.

To all those natural kitty lovers and to all those who love very cute asians and to all those who love tall feminine young ladies and to all those who love very cute ladies in general, Dio is recommended for you. She arrived on time and went to shower to ensure she is very fresh and came out nude like an angel with a very exotic natural kitty and very sexy body I praised the lord for his kindness as I had a very tough week at work and really needed an angel to take me to heaven and Dio was just that. She has the best of hygiene and is a very classy very sweet friendly young lady. This 19 year old student has a very cute oriental face with Angelina Jolie looker-like thick sexy lips and she knows how to use them as well as a very soft sweet tongue. OMG, she sent electrifying waves into my body when I went down on her to kiss that beautiful very sweet, very natural very sexy kitty. The DFK was amazing and I don't recall having such a deep french kiss ever, as well the daty was very deep, very sweet and absolutely delightful too. And yes she does BBBJ too if you so wish. Dio is here temporarily so if you like all above, take the opportunity before the angel flies away to Toronto. A few notes that as I have to make. She does speak little English (but who cares) but when she speaks she is very cute. It is also my understanding that she is highly YMMV, especially on daty and no digits. She is not likely classified as spinner but is very sexy and feminine. My sincere thanks to Dio for such an unforgetable evening. I am now all fresh and relaxed and ready for the incoming work week (oops tomorrow is Sunday lol :-) ). And also I would like to extend my thanks to Candyland for arranging the date with Dio and bringing all these lovely ladies to us in Ottawa. Ottawa is starving for a real asian agency lol. The agency does mostly incalls and in my case it was an outcall as it always is.

I don't believe I've seen a post on this but thought the Men of CERB could provide their planning and preparation rituals for their dates. After a couple of meetings I think I have my routine generally established however, depending on circumstances, adjustments do need to be made. First off, I am generally a long term planner and rarely would book a meeting at the last minute. This usually provides me with ample time to find a lady I think I might connect with and hopefully begin some kind of initial dialogue to get to know each other. Planning and research is a big part of my preparation. I love reading a woman's posts on CERB. It helps me really get to know them. And even better if we've had the chance to chat. My activities usually take place when I'm travelling. I generally stick with women I know and could be classified as a regular when I've connected with a particular woman in a specific city. However, some cities to me haven't resulted in finding a 'local' lady, so in these cases I have to us CERB and other sites to find travelling ladies. Then schedules really get tricky and often things don't align but I'll rarely sacrifice what my interests are. I would rather meet few ladies but have great times than book appointments cause I want one. Of course depending on whether a touring lady or I'm travelling often then also determines if Incall or Outcall. I'm OK with either but would be nervous of some incall locations if I don't know where I am. As date night gets closer I try and learn more about the lady. In particular if I am hosting. For example, does she like a particular beverage for our meeting. I treat it like being a host so try to have 'extras'. This may also include room service for snacks - should we need them. I also make sure my hotel room is tidy. If I'm travelling to an incall I probably do the 'm*pqu*st' thing and may even walk the route so I know where I'm going. This is planning not stalking. I'll also often consider a gift or something unique about me or her that I think is appropriate. This then requires added shopping time but I find it fun to do. I make sure I have the correct donation. I probably seperate and count the money multiple times just so I make sure its right. Just before the date is obviously time for showering, trimming below, shaving, and teeth brushing. Ok, I have at times brushed my teeth 3 times before a date and gargled twice. Figure out what to wear, iron clothes and get dressed. Sometimes, if I'm hosting I will see if I can find good music on my laptop or on the radio to set the mood correct. I probably adjust the lighting a few time to get it just right. At this point my heart is beginning to race. If I'm travelling to an incall I try to not walk so fast that I'm there early and out of breath. Although it has happened. If the lady is coming to me maybe time to brush my teeth again, check my hair, etc. Then that knock on the door. And the fun begins! Deep breaths! Cub

I would have to agree with Erin, we arranged our first meeting thru email and made the final arrangements by phone. I found that we were able to communicate a lot easier at first by email then by a "cold call" over the phone. I find it a lot easier to express my thoughts and feelings by writing them down along with the luxury of time to think about things. I am sure that the provider feels the same, it allows them the time to "get to know" a client. The initial online communication between Erin and myself led to a wonderful encounter when we eventually met, it was like we had known each other for years............ Rodehard

This site is quite unique!!! Very cool what we have here, our own little sub culture haven that I am thankful for.

I look for fb likes all the time... Sometimes in real life as well. My favorite smell has to be the combined odor of two people after a hot session. All salty, musky, and tangy... Mmmzies! Posted via Mobile Device

It s sad to say that in this world I can be me, completely..But in the real world, I can't. I have to protect my image of my "other" self to avoid conflict. My acquaintances outside this line of work, the one s that know what I do here, have no understanding and could never grasp the concept and often either judge me harshly then tell others because they find it entertaining. Because of this, I become the very people I don't like, the "fake's". All my life I have avoided being fake, or put on an act for others, and it turns out I am just that. Only here can I be me. Out there..well that s a different story.

Honestly, Ya, I really do think woman that have multiple partners without protection are sluts and should close their legs. I will however retract the word since maybe it is like you say a derogatory word, and I really am not here to offend anyone. STD s aren't my personal preference and I really do think we should do whatever we want with our bodies, safely. I view abortion the same. If you do it, don't abuse it or your body. I find in the adult industry, is the safest way to have sex.

Ann Landers in favor of legalizing Prostitution STAND ON PROSTITUTION HAS ITS PROS AND CONS Dear Ann Landers: It was courageous of you to run that letter from the Nevada prostitute. I wonder if your client newspapers caught flak for printing it. I, too, am a "Nevada Sex Worker." I enjoy my job and am grateful that the state of Nevada, in its infinite wisdom, accepts the fact that there is a legitimate market for my skills. I work in a licensed brothel and entertain as many as 150 men in every three-week working period. (I then get one week off.) It is an enormous help to have someone such as you acknowledge the need for legalization of the work we do. You really are a tremendous force for good in this world, Ann. Marjorie in the West Dear Marjorie: I appreciate your support and am pleased to tell you that many readers wrote to applaud my courage. The verdict was not unanimous, however. Keep reading for another point of view: Ann Landers (you are not "dear" to me): That letter you printed from the Nevada prostitute was disgusting. I tore the whole page out of the newspaper so my children would not see it. I wonder how many papers canceled your contract because of it. I hope you will respond in print since others who think like I do would be pleased to see it. A Mother of Four Teens in Weatherford, Okla. Dear Mother of Four Teens: Sorry to disappoint you, but I did not receive any cancellations. What appears under my byline reflects life in the real world, and I plan to keep it that way. Keep reading for more: From Fred in Los Angeles: I very much appreciated your column on prostitution. I am a disabled man who visits prostitutes regularly. We are known as "johns." In my youth, I attempted to establish relationships with women I met at work but had no success. From the age of 30 to the present (I am now in my 70s), I have enjoyed the company of many prostitutes who were extremely kind and generous. Not one ever mentioned my physical disability. I believe it is an outrage that a woman whose only crime is making men happy for a fee should go to jail. Something is wrong with a society that thinks that way. Dear Fred: Your letter makes a lot of sense. Thanks for the support. Here's the final word: Tortola in the British Virgin Islands: The Dutch have always been way ahead of the rest of the world in maturity, good common sense and courage. Prostitution is legal in the Netherlands. The women are government inspected for "health problems" every month. The Netherlands has fewer cases of venereal disease than almost any country in the world. A Global Traveler and Professor of Philosophy Dear Global Traveler: You've given me the perfect example with which to close the subject. Thank you on behalf of all the people you helped me educate today. Letter from Magdealene a very sharp provider I've met on an E-mail list who is also very supportive of sexwork.com. She has an interesting website at http://www.realm-of-shade.com/meretrix/ Dear Ann Landers: A while back, you printed a letter about the dangers of prostitution. I would appreciate the opportunity to tell my side of the story. I hope you will print my letter because your assessment was not accurate. I am a 31-year-old woman with a bachelor's degree from a well-known university. I have been a sex worker for the last 14 years and am happy with my career. It burns me up when I read studies that say we are messed-up drug addicts who were abused as children or that we are at risk of getting beaten up or raped by our customers. I do not deny that streetwalking is a difficult and stressful way to make a living, but not all prostitutes are streetwalkers. I work in a brothel in Nevada and would not trade my job for any other that I know of. I perform a valuable service that is legal in most counties in this state. Every woman who works out of our house gets checked by a doctor every week. I have met some fascinating, successful, well-educated men through my profession. Many have been clients of mine for several years. I count among them doctors, lawyers, judges, college professors, politicians and business executives. I make enough money working only two weeks each month and can use the other two weeks to pursue my writing career and work toward a Ph.D. Ann, there's a reason prostitution is called "the world's oldest profession," and it isn't going away. Instead of fighting it, we should decriminalize it everywhere. For a woman who needs to feed her children, the threat of abuse is insignificant compared with watching her babies starve before her eyes. Legal sex work makes it possible for all women to have safer, stress-free working conditions. You should endorse it. Magdalene at Madam Kitty's Ann Landers replies: Dear Magdalene: I caught the significance of your name choice -- from the Bible yet. It is obvious that you enjoy your work, and as I have said before, there always will be a market for what you are selling. For many years, I have been in favor of legalizing your profession and have said so. But please do not try to persuade anyone that babies would starve if their mothers did not go into prostitution. There are many other options -- government assistance is the best known. I won't go down the list of others, but no woman in America needs to sell her body to make a living -- unless, of course, she wants to.

Julia, I think that you will find the CERB community is very friendly and open to various views concerning subjects. It is great that you voiced your opinion and that you shared personal information. Hopefully you will continue to share. I would like to point out two things that are mentioned in your post, that many members of this community would find offensive. You mention (i) Woman should really learn to close their legs. and (ii) Woman that have multi partners without protection, the sluts. I suggest that you not use the word "slut" in a derogatory way. It is true that unprotected sex is very dangerous behaviour and that we should inform others of the dangers of this behaviour. However, in the end, it is a choice that each person must make before having sex. We should all strive to be non-judgmental.

Traditional date with a women First date: flower=25$ (Don't buy chocolate! you don't know if she want to loose weight and if you bring some she may yell at you cause she think you want to make her fat) Nice Dinner=75$ Movie night=30$ bottle of wine=25$ bring her back home and have a good night kiss total=155$ Second date Flower and chocolate (if you don't bring the flowers she will think that you are cheap and just want to have sex with her)=50$ Dinner and wine=100$ Night out + drink=100$ She let you French kiss her =250$ So after 2 dates you are already at 405$ and still didn't have sex. and after the 4th date you may have sex. But you aren't even sure if she will play the dead jelly fish or not Seeing an SP, between roughly 180-300$ and have hot steamy sex that while make your knee wobbling .

I think this thread is good. Good because of the relations that was started between choices of a woman and her body and how it relates to the sex industry. Personally, I will do whatever I want to my body, in turn do whatever you wish with yours. No, I would not have an abortion, I believe in taking responsibilities for my actions. I will say that, being in this industry, girls get very personal and share very personal information, because, we know and understand each other more so than someone who is not in this industry. I have never herd of a woman getting pregnant with a clients baby. I also know many girls that are not in the industry that are complete flat out sluts, that will have sex with many men, protection or not. From my experience, These woman have a much higher rate for abortions. I hear time and again that they were drunk..and..blah blah blah. Then running to the clinic for an abortion a few weeks later. But really, how many times can you get drunk, get pregnant, get an abortion before you realize you need an IUD, that is given free, at the abortion clinic. Woman should really learn to close their legs. I don t think abortions should be confidential-if they are. There should be like a one time only abort-o-clinic. Woman that have multi partners without protection, the sluts..have a lot more to worry about than getting pregnant. I have slept with 5 men in my lifetime. I didn t use protection for every man and I contracted Chlamydia, then gave it to my fiance. I am lucky because medication cleared up my sloppy-sex-disease with two weeks of meds. What if i contracted HIV or herpes or gonorrhea or warts or something like that? Pregnant? Nah, that s the last thing I would be worried about. Additional Comments: Megan, I NEVER would insinuate something like you claim. You should respect my decisions I make with my body. I didn t say any holy-ring about sexual partners. I was stating that I slept with 5 men, and didn t protect myself and contracted a disease..that easy. I hardly doubt bragging about getting a disease is holy-ring about anything. 1 in 5, that s all it took to get a disease. So the last thing I am worried about is getting pregnant, more worried about getting a disease considering I slept with 5 men.(that s a 20% chance) It took me 1000 times to have unprotected sex to get pregnant. I am being honest here. It doesn t matter what anyone else does with their body and no one should care how little or many partners ive had. Not to mention, because you totally read my post wrong, you dropped my reputation points from 27 to 9. that s a tad bit uncalled for, Maybe if I had said something like I ONLY slept with..geesh.. this is my body and I am pro-choice to do whatever you want with yours, don t judge me about my decisions, I thought this post was all about respecting one s decisions and thoughts on them..not for you to "not like" my thoughts, heck, you asked for them..NOT COOL

Secret Admirer, I'm content with things as they are, now. A woman can have an abortion in Canada up to 20 weeks' gestation. After that, there must be compelling medical reasons for a doctor to perform an abortion, such as the mother's life being at risk if the pregnancy continues. I such cases, morality and medicine should not be placed in conflict. Let's not raise the specter of women and/or doctors blithely terminating pregnancies within days of the expected birth of the baby. It's not helpful, it's not legal now, no one is proposing it and, in the end, it only serves to vilify women by portraying us as capricious, irresponsible and unable to consider the meaning and consequences of the choices we make.

There is no such thing as free sex. Posted via Mobile Device

Absolutely pro-choice. I understand, however, why some of those who take the other view are so passionate about their stance. Regardless...freedom of choice, freedom of speech, freedom of association.