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I was surprised recently when a potential client wrote that he didn't want to ask his regular paid companion to write him a reference. He said he didn't want her thinking that he was seeing other escorts. The girl in question I know to be very reference-friendly, but he said he didn't want any drama. I am horrified. If I knew my clients were telling other escorts that I would cause drama and be hurt and upset that he was seeing other girls, I would be furious. That is NOT an image I want projected to the CERB community, particularly as it does NOT represent me fairly. That kind of image does an escort a huge disservice, and hurts her business and reputation. It also creates conflict amongst the girls. If other escorts thought I was a jealous drama queen, I would be mortified. By claiming to protect her 'feelings', this client is being extremely condescending and insulting. These kinds of assumptions about possessiveness and territory are damaging to the SP, and reinforce the stereotype that escorts are emotionally unstable. If you like us (and we're glad that you do!) please HELP us create a great reputation. There is nothing worse than having bad word of mouth, especially initiated by clients who are our fans. The idea that we are romantically or emotionally attached to our clients is generally false. The idea that we don't want clients seeing other girls is false (and kind of funny). We work so hard to make CERB and the escorting community a positive, honest environment. I would hate to think that these assumptions are reversing our progress. Your SP doesn't mind that you see other girls. What she does mind is the damage to her reputation inflicted by this kind of client.

Hey Everyone, Just wanted to let you know that I'm beyond excited. On May 31st the Wonderful Soleil is coming to spend the night with me once again. This truly means the world to me because, she makes me feel so very specal. it has been a truly long winter for me, due to being trapped is the house so much(due to so much snowfall) Having someone like the super nice & sexy Soleil come and see me, really lifts the hardships from my life. Not only does it allow me to have some very, very enjoyable, naughty fun- which I would not otherwise have, her visit alllows me to see the brighter side of life, which can be super hard for me to find, due to my being confined to a power-wheelchair. Anyway, I just wanted to share my excitment,

This is a sensitive topic for anglophones as well as francophones. What unites Cerbites is the conviction that a pussy is beautiful no matter what language its owner speaks.

I would like to provide another perspective on this issue. If you think about it, outside the world of escorts and MAs, it is only natural to feel that your regular "service" provider might be upset if you suddenly switched to someone else. For example, if you showed up at the hair salon, and told the girl that always cuts your hair that today you wanted to try someone new, I don't think she would be too happy. The same might apply to boutiques you visit regularly and are always served by the same person. If you then ask to be served by someone else, isn't it only human for the person who normally serves you to feel rejection of some sort? Isn't it then only natural for clients to believe that SPs and MAs may have the same reaction - escorts and masseuses are human too! If you ask for a presentation line-up at a massage salon, and your regular MA is in the line-up, and you don't choose her, isn't it only human for her to feel some sort of rejection? It has nothing to do with emotional attachment, but it is still rejection of her professional services from someone whom she used to think of as a very satisfied customer. I myself recently had a massage session with a new masseuse at the same salon where my regular MA works. The most convenient time for me would have coincided with the end of my regular MA's shift, but I made the appointment with the new MA for an hour later, simply because I thought it might be too awkward if I met my regular MA on her way out, precisely for the reasons I have just mentioned. The bottom line is that maybe people are being a bit unfair to the client that is the subject of this thread. Isn"t only natural and human for a client to believe that his regular SP would prefer that he see her rather than other SPs?

It is a fundamental feature of our community. SP's see other clients, clients see other SP's. We choose to be part of this community and that is the way it is. No surprise at all. I for one think that referencing is good. I am sorry this happened to Em and glad she vented with this post. Em is a great ambassador to our community, and I value her judgement.

When I was a dancer, there was a lot of competition and people thought they "owned" customers. Once, a gentleman asked me for a lapdance, and I obligued. We stayed for 5 songs in the champagne room. Then when I was in the dressing room, his regular dancer asked me: "Did you know he's my customer? I need my money! How much did he spend on you? He better have enough left for me!" I was also horrified. I find the attitude that we "own" customers and their wallet highly offensive! I've also had several gents decline to give a reference because they don't want their regular lady to know he's seeing a new lady. I've also had a handful of gents tell me: "Please don't tell *** I saw you because I don't want her to get upset." It is completely unreasonable for a lady to expect sexual and "financial" monogamy. My question to the gents is: "If your regular lady is so controlling that you can't see other women, why do you see her??"

This is my job. I have no particular attachment to any of my clients. The other escorts aren't competition; they're colleagues. References are a way for us to be safe. Really, our biggest competition are all the women giving it away for free ;)

I believe more than 90% of the times when we hear a gent say the lady who could provide a reference doesn't like him seeing other SP's means he has told her she is the only lady he frequents and don't want to be caught in his lie which does not necessarily and not likely means she would feel jealous about it.

I thought my one post was it, but after saying things like "As for Quebec, I feel nothing, I see it as irrelevant" I too won't sleep unless I post LOL. What if another province (or provinces) said they wanted to seperate. If one province becomes irrelevant, then don't all provinces become just as "irrelevant"? And really, how can a province be irrelevant? And it's a domino effect that can lead to the balkanization of what once was Canada Now I can go to sleep RG

I don't care for political or religious threads as they often lead to heated discussions. This is a particularly strong topic and I don't want to see it turn bad. I love my country (Just hate the tax system and often the politicians and think they need to be more careful how they spend our money) but cutting it in half to make Quebec it's own Nation... that to me is just insane! I was very glad to see the bloc go away.

I definitely get pre-date jitters as well. I'm nervously excited, but often I'm not too worried about my safety (I trust my screening method and know that bad dates are a very small minority of the clients SPs/MAs see). I wonder about how my date will kiss, taste, how they will feel against me... I wonder if we'll get along, and how the conversation will flow (what if I don't have anything to say? what if it's awkward?) I find it exciting not to know who I'm going to open the door too. Of course I get a good impression of who they are as a person via chat, PM, or e-mail, but there's something about finally seeing them face-to-face that I find really tantalizing!

I can't help but feel that a Conservative majority cannot bode well for the outcome of this case. I hope I'm wrong...

Oh boy, I can't believe i'm going to get involved in this. I'm gonna go with the fact that the east coast would suddenly be cut off from the rest of the country would be pretty shitty. Having lived in Quebec a few years back, I understand that the quebecois have a beautiful and unique culture that is different from the rest of canada, and a part of me can understand the separatist beliefs. It was kind of like living in a different country. However, I have also lived in B.C, and central alberta, and have spent time in many other parts of the country and to be honest, EVERY region in canada has it's own uniqueness and differences from the rest of the country. Should Nunavut separate because they are so distinctly different from the white collar, government culture of Ottawa? Should the Acadians in New Brunswick follow suit if quebec separates? They also have a culture and heritage that's heavily francophone. How about Manitobans? What the hell do I have in common with a Fisherman from Nova Scotia? It may sound Cliche'd, but our overall diversity is kind of what makes Canada rad. Not just the people, but even the terrain. Being a prairie boy, I felt like I was on a another planet when I hiked through B.C.'s forests. Quebecers may be more vocal about it, but you aren't the only ones who feel like you don't quite fit in. We live in a huge country, there's bound to be differences in belief and culture. It's just kind of part of what makes us canadian. I'm not sure if this will help or not. Juts my half thought out ramblings. P.S. While you may not like alberta's politics, I'm willing to bet you enjoy their incredible beef ;)

For all Janis fans I found to the grapevine she will be in Ottawa this week She is a gem. Looking forward to see her. PM for details Posted via Mobile Device

I'm a real woman. I have real feelings about many things and for many people. While I find it helpful to compartmentalize my work as a paid companion, keeping it separate from the rest of my life, I certainly do care about some of my clients more than others. For example, those I've seen frequently over an extended period of time can mean a lot to me. We've shared experiences that matter to me and I look forward to seeing these gentlemen again in the future. But I happily give references to other companions when asked. I never worry that I'm "losing" a client. To begin with, I'm not that insecure. I expect that clients may enjoy variety. Not only am I rarely the first paid companion they've known, but I'm also aware that most of them are married. When I want to be the only woman in a man's life, I will get married. In the meantime, I seek to cultivate a good relationship with the gentlemen with whom I spend my time and also with other paid companions. References are one way to keep us safe. Helping other companions helps me, too. When we look out for each other, we're all safer, healthier and stronger--and better companions, too. It's important to remember that we sell fantasies. One fantasy is that the companion is a fabulous girlfriend: devoted, attentive, responsive, affectionate, understanding, generous, kind and happy to be with the client. He knows that, in conventional relationships, he can't meet a woman for the first time and be in her bed within a few minutes, or even on the same day. He gets to pretend that reality is suspended, for a little while, and that his deepest desires and fantasies can be played out without any repercussions for the broader relationship with this particular partner. (Many men come to see us because they want to experiment with something or try something out that they feel they couldn't ask their regular partner to do with them.) Some clients want to believe that they're the world's finest lovers, so studly and erotically compelling that a woman won't be able to think of anyone else once they've been together, whether they actually hope she will leave the business or not. Others want to believe that they have a string of broken hearts trailing in their wake. More than a few think of paid companions as damsels in distress whom they might protect, defend or rescue from a terrible fate. These are all fantasies--the client's fantasies. I'm sure that some companions occasionally have trouble maintaining good boundaries between themselves and their clients. They may become a bit needy, demanding or even a little desperate for attention and reassurance. I worry about these women. Paid companionship is harder than it seems to most people. Companions who have a lot of difficulty with boundaries may take too many risks; engage in self-defeating, inappropriate or aggressive behaviour; or be unstable. This is the worst kind of work for such women. Working in our industry can be very harmful to them emotionally and psychologically. Both good clients and good companions help establish and maintain good boundaries for themselves and each other. Asking for a reference is one way for a client to do that.

If anyone believes that clients see only one escort reguarily, it is BS. Just as in the case with Emily's potential client. He's telling the escort he reguarily sees that he doesn't see anyone else. Why not just be truthful with the SP? Then there is no drama. The fact that he is lying to her is creating drama. It becomes more fueled when clients want to play games like this. We as SPs do not own our clients and I also find it insulting that we are thought of as jealous and possesive women. I've had a few good regulars tell me they see no one else and I find it hard to believe but then again, how do I know? I have no eomtional ties to them and I'm not in a committed relationship with them. I've also had a small amount of guys in the community say that they're going to catch up with me and see me soon because they are so busy with work but yet they are reguarily seeing an escort who is in my area. Why lie? Why would I care as I have only seen this person once? No need to be fake and make excuses. We're adults... we know guys like variety or have certain regulars they see. That's what makes this industry so interesting

When I first started working, I dived in headfirst and did zero research. I was already seeing clients in my home before I even realized it was illegal and before I even knew escort review boards existed. And I really barely even knew about Craigslist, so I didn't even have much for comparison in the way of going rates. As a result, my first rates were super cheap and by the act, rather than the time. Then I learned very quickly that if you charge by the act, you could be there for ages because guys will take advantage of your time if there is no time limit. I posted mostly on Craigslist and was frustrated by the responses and the constant questions and back and forth emails and I eventually ended up with the Playgirls because I didn't want to deal with any of the administration stuff. From there, I found out about the various review boards and started reading up about the work and talking to other providers and so forth. By the time that I was working both independently doing incalls and for the Playgirls doing outcalls, I had a pretty good idea of what the going rates were in Ottawa and for my particular niche and since then not much as changed, except that I got into fetish work (which I charge more for, because it is more work and because I can afford to charge more--there are lots of fetish requests, but few providers). I do not think that those who charge less are degrading themselves, and these days I barely even pay attention to other SP's rates. The worst thing you can do in this business (I think) is compare yourself to others. You will always end up falling short, because you are your own worst critic. Edit: I realized this was kind of unclear, but my general point was, the only time you really need to check out others' rates is if you are new and just starting and have no idea what going rates are. Once you're settled and have a bit more experience under your belt, then it doesn't make much sense to compare yourself.

I beleive it has to do on how a lady perceives her accomodations; I see it as a temporary investment that is part of the whole experience shared with my gentlemen. Entertaining in an upscale hotel suite that provide some luxuries one might not come across in everyday life, for example, a jacuzzi for 2 filled with bubbles by candle light, can be quite appealing for many as opposed to a regular room or a "quite a bit less then upscale hotel" (just using your wording) or a room that has a "motel feel" to it. I know that for some gentlemen that the ladies' choice of accomodations can be a deterrent. On a few occasions I have heard the following: "The lady I decided to see last week/month was very nice and sweet but you should've seen where she stayed. I was not impressed at all..." IF it's the ladie's habit to stay in those types of rooms/hotels, will the gentlemen repeat if they are not comfortable with their surroundings? I highly doubt it. Just like in any other business, sometimes you have to spend money to make money!

Ladies are ALWAYS going to charge what they want whether the rest of us approve or not. Some ladies would rather be HIGH volume at a lower rate than chance not having a booking at a high rate. It all comes down to what she wants to charge and how much she wants to work. In a time where people are hungry for business some will do anything to get it. You have to not let it get to you and remember that there is something for everyone and sometimes it takes time to find it. Clients will book you for you and your experience that you offer, not your price(if it is out of budget they will save up if they really want to visit (like anything if you want it you will save)) In 6 years this business has gone from one extreme to the next and you really can't let it get to you.

IMHO, it is not the price the SP is requesting that would be considered degrading, but rather how they are treated by others. An earlier comment regarding sticking together and supporting each other commands far more merit than any price point. The price doesn't necessarily mean you get what you pay for, it just means you get who you pay for. Personally, I first look over the ads, then the reviews. If the SP appeals to me, I will check the amt of required donation. Most SP's are within a range so it is not an issue. For those who are higher, I may have to pass for economical reasons (or I may try to save more for the special treat) I don't think many of the hobbyist would shop by price first and then choose the SP. If an SP is really undercutting to get a 'fix', I think this would either be detected and avoided, or at least would be suspicious since it is not normal. If the SP is price reducing because they are desperate for the next 'fix', they are not degrading themselves by reducing their rate, just means that they are in need of help and assistance as their lives are at stake! It is not my intent to offend anyone, and if I have, I apologize in advance.

You should get to know the person first before asking for picnic,amusement park and the like kind of dates. You really need the chemistry to make them work...i'm sure some ladies don't care about the chemistry but i do. One of the reasons i hate the term sp...i rather like being called an escort or companion. To me an sp provides a service while an escort/companion provides much more...the listener,the cuddle up with you lady,the lady that makes you feel as if you are very special...we want you to feel the best you ever have...We do it all...where as an sp gives you the "service" and that's it. that's just my ideas on this subject.... my rates are the same no matter what i'm doing because it's my time your paying for and nothing else...what we decide to do in that time is up to us.. kisses, Emma

I'd say lack of certain sexual services, seeing as it was stated that things such as being partially undressed, kissing and fondling would still be expected; which to me are sexual services. In my opinion, I don't think a lower rate should be expected or asked for just because there is no actual intercourse which is essentially the only thing that is eliminated in this scenario. Many SPs charge for their time, not specific services. If a gentleman wants to use his time with an SP to just cuddle, great! But don't expect to pay less for it. That being said, at the end of the day, every lady has the right to choose what they will, and what they won't, do and how much they will charge for their services. They should never be made to feel like they should charge less than what they are asking because of the elimination of certain sex acts.

Wow... I really don't think she was attacking you.. I think she was making a statement. There are a handful of guys out there who seem much interested "making friends" more so than using our "services".. I get that you were joking around with your comments, but it did come off to me as one of these people who's looking more for a friend or "free time"... not that you are, was just my first thought reading your posts... I personally would never offer 'social time' to a new client.. I've done it before and it can turn into a big uncomfortable mess. I don't really see the point of this thread at all.. There are girls who offer social time, and on other ladies sites I've read that state; "This is not an offer of prostitution, you are paying for time and companionship only." Making this thread seems (to me,) to be more like a way of asking for lower prices because of lack of sexual services...