nomff23 100 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Hey gang, I was just hoping I could get your .02 on something. Last night lurking through the BP ads I came across someone I knew personally and that I found very attractive and I've always wanted to spend some "time" with her if you know what I mean! Of course her ad is using an alias and I will use that when I book but now when I show up it'll be somewhat of a surprise if she remembers me(which she should). I just don't know if it'll be awkward for her resulting in a bad session for either of us.. I've always found her super attractive and she'd be a repeat SP for sure. So.. what do you guys think, any opinions would be greatly appreciated! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1963Kennedy 10698 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Tell her up front; nobody likes surprises. I'm sure she'll be OK with it 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IsaMassage 54318 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Agree tell her up front. . She may refuse to see you even once you are there... avoid an awkward situation Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nomff23 100 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Fair enough, lets say she does refuse to see me won't she be thinking wtf is he doing looking at escort ads? Lol I'm 22, and dont want her to share with the world that I'm seeking companionship with an escort! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 (edited) Agreed, tell her up front that you know her and who you are. If she is an old friend it shows respect for the friendship No need to worry about secrets being revealed, she has as much reason to keep your secret as you do hers, you both partake in the same lifestyle. I don't think anyone would want to be surprised in this lifestyle, and seeing someone you know from outside this lifestyle, that wouldn't just be a big surprise, it would likely be a shock too. RG Edited December 14, 2013 by r__m__g_uy 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bcguy42 38594 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Lol I'm 22, and dont want her to share with the world that I'm seeking companionship with an escort! Since she is using an alias, she quite possibly does not want to share with the world that she is an escort. It would be difficult for her to tell anyone you were looking for escorts without "outing" herself. Think of it as a variant of the US-USSR ballistic missile policy - MAD (Mutual Assured Destruction), Neither of you is likely to destroy the other. lol 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NotchJohnson 214076 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 My .02 cents on this is don't think about it, just forget you seen her ad and move on. There are so many other girls out there don't risk the "friendship" you have things can turn sour real quick and I would not want to be mixed up in it. Again just my opinion you can still do what you want, you know her better then I or anyone else on here. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realnicehat Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Fair enough, lets say she does refuse to see me won't she be thinking wtf is he doing looking at escort ads? Lol I'm 22, and dont want her to share with the world that I'm seeking companionship with an escort! Ah, the arrogance and ignorance of youth. Tell me, who exactly do you think that she is going to share it with? Her discretion is just as important to her as yours is to you. And why exactly would it be so shocking for her to discover that you, at age 22, see escorts? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IsaMassage 54318 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Fair enough, lets say she does refuse to see me won't she be thinking wtf is he doing looking at escort ads? Lol I'm 22, and dont want her to share with the world that I'm seeking companionship with an escort! There is a possibility she would refuse your request more likely because she may feel uncomfortable. .. it will safe you both wasting time... if you don't tell her and you showed up at her door she may still refuse to see you... as per privacy goes... as everyone says it is a 2 way street. .. she may not want people around her finding out about her job .. even more than you don't want people around you knowing that you enjoy paid companionship.. Maybe also what NotchJohnson suggested maybe is better to just move on and not book time together... there is plnety of others ladies... 5 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Athos 108589 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 so if you go through with this you absolutely should tell her up front. I don't think escorts are surprised to find anyone looking through ads and seeking companionship. They are used to seeing all sorts of people, from all walks of life. I'm not at all sure what "sort" is supposed to be seeking companionship this way. There is no such thing as typical, and if there is, it likely is that we are all pretty "unexpected". But, I actually think Notch is right ... there is lot's of potential for this to go pear shaped and you would be well advised to avoid. There are lots of wonderful providers. I don't necessarily think seeing a provider because she is someone you wanted in civilian life is a good idea. Porthos 3 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icebreaker 3938 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 From the lady's point of view I think it is very likely that she would refuse the appointment because you are trying to book with her knowing fully who she is. She may perceive trying to book with her as a round about way of trying to be intimate with her where the intimacy may not have happened naturally when you knew her before thus adding a level of discomfort on her part before the appointment even begins. As the others have said I would just choose another lovely lady to spend time with as you may find it difficult to overcome the perceptions listed above. This is just my opinion of things to be aware of. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nomff23 100 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Thanks guys! On to the next one for me then :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carrie Moon 68826 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Actually.. I had it happen that someone from my high school I hadn't seen in 25 yrs contacted me to say he had seen my ad and had had a major crush on me back then. I was tickled to see him but actually nervous too! It went very well.. but then again I've been at this a long time. 2-3 other times people surprised me by booking me.. I saw them anyway and was okay with it as well... but not everyone would be for sure... better to be safe than sorry I guess.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Thanks guys! On to the next one for me then :-) That's good to hear. For me, I was wondering whether she would think that you might try to blackmail her into something (free sessions, discounts, etc etc) by either saying ahead of time that you do know her in real life, or waiting until you arrive to say the same thing. You have to expect her to be suspicious of your sudden interest but as well, mentioning that you know who she is. I assume she used face pics in her ads, and just might link this thread to the other one here where some guys are discussing that they won't see sps who don't have face pics, for the sps who think they have to lol. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest c**io**m7 Report post Posted December 14, 2013 Contact her...tell her you think you know each other...tell her your real name and let her decide... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 (edited) My advice for the OP and others who may find themselves in this situation for future reference is to not call her and leave it at that. Just because you find her attractive and want to spend time with her doesn't mean she will go for it if you just happened to just show up. I respectfully disagree with others about telling her you know her beforehand. This is just being an alarmist and for her to be on the receiving end of that is not anything to be peachy keen about. If someone did this to me, I'd be upset and there would be no encounter regardless of whether or not I knew that the person contacted me knowing it was me or had no idea it was me. Remember, if you were to go ahead and set up an appt knowing it's her, that imo is sneaky ( and women can't stand men who are sneaky, myself included) and it's not the way to go about wanting to be with someone even if she never knew this. You could always plead your case that you didn't know it was her. However, this is dependant on if you knew her personally in the last few years to be able to recognize her which you said you did or haven't seen her in a long, long time where people's appearance can change minimally or drastically. In your case, you do know it's her and if you know what's right, this would always remain in the back of your mind as a guilty feeling. You would also be putting yourself in an awkward position for rejection and no one likes to experience that. An SP has the right to refuse anyone...even if she does know them. Please don't go about this the wrong way because it's always possible in her mind that she will consider you a douchebag forever from there on out for calling her out ( esp if she were to find out that you did know her beforehand) and you also have your privacy to think about if you both have mutual friends/acquaintances in common. And let's not forget social media where gossip is rampant. Not everyone is accepting of this hobby. I had an SP friend of mine see a client who claimed to know me from when I was younger and put her on the spot about it by attempting to get it out of her if xxxxxxxxxxxxx was my name. I don't know what was said during their time together. That was not cool on his end or discrete for that matter. If you do recognize an SP online or in public, it's best to keep it to yourself. And don't just show up.. it doesn't make for a good scene that ends on a positive note. Edited December 15, 2013 by Nicolette Vaughn typos 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lunaterium 140 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 I feel like this is the flip side of the discretion that SPs grant clients. It seems like the tasteful thing to do would be to take a pass on this situation and extend the same sense of discretion to her. Move on, there are loads of other SPs to choose from. (The OP already indicated that he was going to do exactly that.) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VedaSloan 119179 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 Just a thought--you know her in real life and it's never happened, so why do you think you should be able to pay her to get that privilege? Booking a call with her and not telling her who you are is called "FALSE PRETENSES" and nobody likes thinking Person X is going to show up and then having Person Y arrive. Forget you saw her ad, and don't ever try to trick her into seeing you by not telling her who you are. 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jabba 18389 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 (edited) I agree with your decision to move on. I think I'm just repeating what Nicolette said... Tempting as it might be to give her a ring, I was thinking of other complications. As she is/was an old friend, maybe you both know people in common? If so, and if you saw her, things have ways of getting "out". At your stage in life, you may not fully appreciate how your hobbying information (in the hands of unscrupulous people) could forever impact your reputation. To varying degrees, we here on Cerb all have hobbying/professional/personal lives to maintain. I for one, prefer to separate and protect all of the above. I recommend you don't take unnecessary risks. While I respect the professionalism of all the providers here, this is still an underground lifestyle and nobody wants to be "outed" in public. Your friend in turn may also feel the burn. However, since she is advertising with a face pic, I believe she has already accepted any downstream consequences. This includes the possibility of meeting people she knows. She may have a plan on how to handle these types of situations. ...just thinking out loud here Edited December 15, 2013 by Jabba 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roamingguy 300292 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 More thinking about it, especially after reading some of the other posts...and especially considering if she is/was a friend, move on. Don't even contact her about an encounter. Just you contacting her may put her at unease, she now knows you know about her being a escort. She may not feel free to decline, fearing reprisals (ie blackmail etc). You may be under normal circumstances the perfect client, but since she is a friend, it absolutely clouds you and her having an SP/Client relationship. So don't contact her. Even though she'll never know, it could be the biggest act of friendship you can do for her An early morning rambling RG 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mikeyboy 27113 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 This lifestyle is all about fantasy. Reality and fantasy should not be mixed in my opinion. The fact that you had real feelings for her is a good reason not to pursue this in this manner. Too much danger in misunderstanding the nature of the relationship and someone getting hurt. If it was meant to be, it would have happened in the real world. Keep this fantasy world from becoming too personal. Just my initial thoughts on the matter. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ice4fun 78396 Report post Posted December 15, 2013 I am not sure I would proceed with a booking but if I did I would tell her first who I was. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Athos 108589 Report post Posted December 16, 2013 Some great posts here. I think it is very important to take into account the feedback from the ladies here ... Some great advice. definitely put it out of your head and move on. Porthos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meg O'Ryan 266444 Report post Posted December 16, 2013 Tell her that you think you know who she is and let her decide if she would be comfortable seeing you. I actually met someone I knew many years ago and we still have a blast! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nomff23 100 Report post Posted December 16, 2013 Thanks for the advice guys, I'm not going to book with her! Lol "onto" the next one :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
