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Im starting to hate this industry

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I dont care if you have a different opinion.. i honestly am so sick and tired of the scams.. all you providers expect it like its just a simple request without ever acknowledging that clients are getting screwed over sending deposits.. i am just getting over trying to have faith in SP's .. trying to find a regular is a fucking nightmare fulm of scams and rude ass women

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I feel like i have to add.. even when Im very clear Im looking for a regular rather than seeing many providers .  I end up having SP's tell me that they will be available for something regular .  Only to tell me during the appointment that they are actually travelling to vancouver or the east coast or toronto etc.. like.. when even providers who do show up for the scheduled appointment still lied to book it in the first place .. is that even fair?

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     Please keep in mind you're dealing with a grey/dark market and getting scammed is far from the worst thing that can happen to you. You can get arrested, robbed, beaten, doxed or even killed. Don't want to scare you, But those should be solid argument to learn who you're dealing with and understand current laws.

     I created a thread on how to screen ads:

     How to: Verify pics, ads and identify potential fraud. - Lyla

     Screening providers is not an exact science. But if you can't find any feedback on someone, the more cautious you should be.

     As for finding a regular, this can be trickier depending where you live. And was made more complicated after two years of social distancing. Can only suggest you take your time in finding someone willing to build a business relationship and avoid obvious traps.

     

     

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The sheer fact that you preface your statement with how sick and violent this industry is.. is sickening.. and only highlights my point that alk these providers who constantly post that clients should just simply send deposit without acknowledging the risks they put on us .. is a problem

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1 minute ago, Quietfun said:

The sheer fact that you preface your statement with how sick and violent this industry is.. is sickening.. and only highlights my point that alk these providers who constantly post that clients should just simply send deposit without acknowledging the risks they put on us .. is a problem

     I'm simply pointing out the risks of dealing with complete strangers. This also apply to any unregulated transactions. It's not just about reading reviews and recommendations. You sometimes need to directly contact who wrote those and see if they actually met that person and provide more information.

     You can also consider alternatives like massages and dancers as long don't intend to harass and coerce them.

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omg I returned due to notifications; OMFG!!! the number of typos, spelling & grammatical errors in this!!! 😵

..

🥴

Well... it keeps me humble LMAO

 

Yikes!!!

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@JessyCeleste while i do appreciate your helpful suggestions . I am making the decision to never send a deposit again. There are simply too many scammers out there and even though there might be some great SP's out there.. the majority by and large are not

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8 hours ago, Quietfun said:

@JessyCeleste while i do appreciate your helpful suggestions . I am making the decision to never send a deposit again. There are simply too many scammers out there and even though there might be some great SP's out there.. the majority by and large are not

Perhaps you should take your chances seeing someone that doesn't require a deposit if you having such bad luck

 

I'm sure there some that dont require one😊

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There are indeed some providers that are okay working without deposits. Cash is king after all!

 

 @Phaedrus your mind is my favorite 💋

Edited by Kitten
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 i honestly am so sick and tired of the scams.. 

Yup. And it seems like it's more now than ever before and no signs of

slowing down. 

 

The one thing I despise about this industry is looking for a "new" regular.

I currently have a "regular" that i've been seeing for 3 years and I've had

one before her that I was seeing for 10 years but she moved away just

before Covid started. So just one left. 

 

I have totally written off "online deposits" as instant 100% scams just to protect 

myself from a nightmare situation. Even if they aren't, I'm not willing to roll the

dice and find out anymore. I'm too old to be playing in the minefield. I'll keep 

my current regular until she quits the biz and then it's retirement time. 

 

No regrets. It's better to be safe than sorry. A clean & safe exit is a good exit.

Just like that Kenny Rogers song said :

 

"You gotta know when to hold 'em / know when to fold 'em / know when to walk away..."

 

#NoRegrets

 

 

😎

 

 

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I want to agree here.. i find it's becoming out of control. I have to do so much research just to try and verify if a provider is real. Leolist has become a minefield of fake ads. Twitter accounts can be faked; so can websites and even reviews. even on this site.. truly the only way is to know someone else either a client or a provider who can vouch for them. I see so many great women on this site but none in my area. so far i have found only those on tour that i would truly reccomend. I have been burned for deposit on occasion myself and it's frustating. I have hope though that if some of these women see a need or demand in the area that they will come. It helps if the quality of clients in the area are just as good as the women we want to attract but i have personally been told by providers that a lot men in my area are basically pigs so that isnt helping the cause either . I take it with a grain of salt. I try to be a good client.. clean, respectful and aplreciative of their time and just hope others do the same. 

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18 hours ago, TakeMeToParadise said:

i have personally been told by providers that a lot men in my area are basically pigs so that isnt helping the cause either

See I feel this is incredibly subjective. I don't mind when men have a little pig in them as long as they're respectful towards my needs. I find them to be fun. Both together are possible but understand not everyone may feel the same. If it's not appropriate to say negative things about providers it shouldn't be appropriate to speak negatively towards clients as well.

Someone mentioned "seeing a need" above and it's sparked a though of if more intermediary work could be achieved. Outside of agencies already doing so. Sadly in an unregulated industry those roles can become misrepresented. I wonder if this is something mods would consider offering? Just a thought!

Edited by Kitten
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On 2/20/2022 at 3:27 PM, Quietfun said:

@JessyCeleste while i do appreciate your helpful suggestions . I am making the decision to never send a deposit again. There are simply too many scammers out there and even though there might be some great SP's out there.. the majority by and large are not

 My pleasure to help. Helping you on this helps both sides of the entire industry too. Hopefully this info will help others avoid what you've endured. 

Oh I'm not challenging your decision. You do what's right for you.

 

Unfortunately, what you say about the average is true and true for every group there is. And as others say, the more underground things are forced into the more sickos come along to exploit it. So this industry is one that suffers greatly as a result. On both sides. We all hear plenty of what SWs go through if they aren't aware of how to avoid trouble and only see good clients.  If they are scamming you for deposits, most arent actually SPs. Catfish found out an onlyfans model was a man without conscience in his 30s or 40s who would use the names & pix of an actual OF model and simply scammed money from the guys with good hearts. This was his job he said and she wasnt the only SW he was exploiting and endangering to profit from.

 

Here's a link to the episode:

part 1: 

 

Part 2:

 

 WORST OF ALL: The show didnt even bother to blur out the SWs face! So guess what happened to her? She was exploited and screwed over even further. While she trusted her mom wouldnt go on OF and find her there, she sure as hell does watch OF ! Here's her reaction. Now she was ok in the end with her family knowing but she should not have that choice taken from her. A lot of us would be destroyed in their family life. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gFkF4RCyms

 

I can list a bunch of other examples. As someone here had said, no reputable SW would risk her rep to make a small sum. So I wouldn't use those people to describe most SWs anymore than I would describe someone pretending to be a client who beats, rapes and robs the worker. He's not a client, he never was. She was never a SW. But even with those posing removed, you still will find psycopaths and sociopaths more often than groups that are in the open... and even there... is the average collections agent a good person? Is the average hairdresser or stock broker? As communities like this exist, one can definitely say that the reputable SPs do conduct themselves well as does the average hobbyist. But lyla is not Leolist, LeoList is not instagram/twitter and those arent the street corner. As you can see here, many hobbyists and SPs have enjoyed many years together, some for decades, some more. 

As I said, many SPs will wave the deposit fee if she is not just visiting and if you have references. Given how many scams you have encountered, you would have also experienced meeting with several SWs and as long as you were respectful, you should get a ref from more than one. Keep in mind, even if she wasn't necessarily someone you would see again, the point of a reference is only assured safety... so its not the same as when hobbyists review/recommend us. So don't hesitate to ask. Deposits weren't a thing until covid. It was extremely rare and when it did happen it was for far off outcalls or full day bookings. This only started because of inconsiderate behavior of many clients and bad behavior of non clients. Once it was established, ya, the vultures came out. So the fact it was only became the norm because of necessity (you can watch its progression starting from 2019 to witness the standard and then starting looking again around june/july 2020 onward... See how often it happened, see those lamenting they may have to start asking deposits... what you went through with scams, they went through except a hotel room is way more than a deposit. So to blame isnt helpful.  or defame or make stats on groups that  have little to do with each other. Just finding solutions & communicating is. 

 

I wish you luck in your ventures. Please, even without sending deposits, do your due diligence because losing a deposit is not the only thing that can go wrong for a hobbyist.

Edited by JessyCeleste
adding source
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14 hours ago, QuakeRegina said:

I think its most providers asking for deposits but some fat guy hacker trying to scam a quick payout no one will report to the cops

the guy on catfish was indeed overweight How'd you know? oh and thanks for reminding me I will edit and link the episode!

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On 2/21/2022 at 3:01 AM, clearbluesky15 said:

@JessyCeleste thanks for the great post. That had some great insight on how to spot real providers, and insight into some the recent challenges with the pandemic.

 

Thanks!

My pleasure!

22 hours ago, TakeMeToParadise said:

I want to agree here.. i find it's becoming out of control. I have to do so much research just to try and verify if a provider is real. Leolist has become a minefield of fake ads. Twitter accounts can be faked; so can websites and even reviews. even on this site.. truly the only way is to know someone else either a client or a provider who can vouch for them. I see so many great women on this site but none in my area. so far i have found only those on tour that i would truly reccomend. I have been burned for deposit on occasion myself and it's frustating. I have hope though that if some of these women see a need or demand in the area that they will come. It helps if the quality of clients in the area are just as good as the women we want to attract but i have personally been told by providers that a lot men in my area are basically pigs so that isnt helping the cause either . I take it with a grain of salt. I try to be a good client.. clean, respectful and aplreciative of their time and just hope others do the same. 

Personally, I dont bother with LeoList, never have, never will. Its a total crap chute on both sides so I personally see no point in attracting unsavory characters while being amongs a bunch of scammers when the good hobbyists will end up checking me out somewhere like Lyla or an Indy Companion collective in the end anyway. If I were a hobbyist, I wouldn't go anywhere near there. Why go sifting for gold though a bunch of sand? Sure a lot of good ones are there but they will ALSO be on lyla or in a collective, so why bother? Same with our end with clients. A good hobbyist will find me and will either know better than bother with leolist or eventually do research and find me in a better place. So yes, I would recommend avoiding it. All hassle, no benefit if you ask me. And verification is a joke on there. It means nothing.  

For recos and reviews: take one timer posters with a grain of salt. Completely disbelieve ones that only post for one person and no one else. If thats just a recent thing fine... he just found his dream girl but I mean EVER.  And sadly, I would not trust reviews from agency SPs unless its from a well known Poster here or from multiple posters who have recoed SPs from other agencies or independents as well. Although the mods are pretty hardcore at catching those.  I once had pages of recos removed because a stupid driver made fake reviews for girls hoping he could drive for them. I didnt ask for it, need it or appreciate it!  So his one BS reco deleted a years worth of genuine ones. Thankfully the mods understood it wasnt my doing. Anyway, the sniffed it out because he only recoed SPs from that agency and funny... only on nights he woked. lol  Wanted to throttle the guy. For his stupid 20$ he brought me (and others) to square one. Many members only trust recos for new SPs if they are done by members who word they trust. But as long as the poster has reviewed SPs that arent all from the same place and has reviewed SPs that have nothing to do with each other, its trustworthy.

I'm so sorry you have  been burned. Enrages me.

May I ask your area? You may have already but if not, please check if there is a collective there. Google keywords like

___city/town name___ indy companions

" ----------------------------" independent companions

"------------" indy/independent sex workers collective

 

Another good move would be to post what you are looking for in your area's section. I once found a regular client who had posted that he was looking for a lady with strong legs lol Not something anyone usually advertise but i contacted him and it just so happened we were a perfect match. Again, I was starting out back then so spent a lot more time on admin. I go for long periods without even advertising let alone perusing forums but... takes a few mins, doesnt hurt and may give fruit!

 

We should make a thread for how much we've each lost... SPs and Hobbyists alike, too depressing though

 

Again, Im so sorry for every cent you lost and all your frustration.

 

Jessy

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I request to meet first, always, for a coffee or tea in a public place. If the escort or domme refuses this, I assume they are a scam looking for an easy deposit. 

 

I have also been scammed in person by a horrible, monsterous woman in Toronto, but at least she was a real human who I actually got to meet lol

 

I'm trans, but also gender critical, and a kinkster too. I get denied service for all kinds of morally questionable reasons, but I get that it's all about preferance and comfort(the feeling is mutual). I understand that sex work is hard work, and also a form of exploitation(most work is), but I have never been so denied, decieved and betrayed as I have been among sex workers. It's extremely disappointing.

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6 hours ago, SarahAlexxx said:

I swear he was a SW in a past life.

Hail King @Phaedrus

 

well... we do not have evidence that @Phaedrus is not a SW in this life 🤨

who knows ... may be he is a super elite super secret companion..... the kind they make movies on, with yachts & casinos

may be he is the one they call when Shania Twain or Bryan Adams need love 😏

 

... yeah !  I will roll with this narrative  ! 😜

~

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23 minutes ago, beesh said:

 

well... we do not have evidence that @Phaedrus is not a SW in this life 🤨

who knows ... may be he is a super elite super secret companion..... the kind they make movies on, with yachts & casinos

may be he is the one they call when Shania Twain or Bryan Adams need love 😏

 

... yeah !  I will roll with this narrative  ! 😜

~

Love that!

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Also curious what area this gentleman is in. It could help provide some suggestions.

This verified independent badass set her own rules and is always open to entertaining new faces! Why do I have a feeling you may be somewhere more remote?

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