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Life's Like A Cock. When It Gets Hard..... Fuck It. I am officially on VACATION ;) hehehe. Stay Sexy, Smile Hard, Roar Loud!

Had a lovely evening last night with some of my friends knowing that it was the perfect opportunity to see me drunk and silly (and pantless) prior to my birthday/surgery combo tomorrow. That led to being invited to another lovely dinner tonight with a couple of former CERB member/providers (not so pantless) .... It has been a great pre-birthday weekend that ends tomorrow with the removal of the gall bladder... a pleasant present in disguise!!!!

This chart is problematic in that it conflates legalization and decriminalization, which are not the same thing. So for example, under Canada in the table, it lists prostitution, brothels and pimping as being legal--that's actually incorrect and misleading. Should the government of Canada do nothing and allow the laws to be struck down after the year long stay, then brothels and pimping would be DECRIMINALIZED, not legal. The wording is important here. If the government decides to implement laws to regulate brothels and pimping, then you could say that brothels and pimping were legalized. Legalization is regulation by the state. Second, referring to the criminalization of third parties as "pimping" laws is also misleading and may cause some to wonder why a country would be pro-pimps (as they're understood by most people), when in fact the so-called "pimping" laws criminalize ALL third parties regardless of exploitative relationships. These charts are certainly a good place to start if you're interested in prostitution law and policy, but like Wikipedia, they should be read with care and act only as a starting point.

Pretty indiscreet to be outing the hotels ladies use.

You've got a bit of a wait for Jenny! She won't be back until late April/early May. :(

a young boy hears the word whorehouse on the schoolyard one day and asks his father the meaning of the word upon arriving home . the father , shocked by the question blurts out " its a place you go to have fun ! " the boy insists that they go , the father informs the boy he is too young . on the weekend the father has some friends over for drinks . remembering the question his son had he suggest that they all head out . unbeknownst to the men the young over heard them and decided to follow . after some time has passed the men make their way home and the boy decides to enter the whorehouse . he walks through the door and exclaims to the madame that he is there for a good time .the madame being a kind hearted quick thinking lady gives the boy three doughnuts and sends him on his way . the parents are nervous wrecks back at home wondering where their child could be . as he walks through the door they both run to him and ask where he has been ? the boy proudly exclaims " I was at the whorehouse ! " his parents taken-a-back utter " well .... how was it ? " the boy tells them " I handled the first 2 no problem , the third one I could only lick ! "

My one and thus far only ménage developed uniquely (well maybe unique, I don't know) It's a bit of a story. It began in my early days of this lifestyle when I was a wet behind the ears newbie. My first three encounters were less than spectacular to be nice, but I my forth encounter was with Lonna Lux, and I was blown away (no pun intended). It wasn't a good encounter, it was a great encounter, so great I scheduled an appointment with her for my second encounter in two months time (for me that's quick planning) Meanwhile I was on CERB reading posts and looking at profiles and another lady caught my eye, Emily In Toronto. You all know her now as Emily Rushton. I contacted her and she told me of her requirements for a reference along with verification/screening. I emailed Lonna asking if she would provide me with a reference, and she did. Almost a hiccup, was Emily didn't know of Lonna, but I did also provide a website link so Emily knew Lonna was a bona fide companion. Anyhow that's how I got to meet Emily, another great companion Keep in mind Emily and Lonna only knew one another through the emails about giving me a reference, that's all, they never met in person. And during that time period and subsequently I saw Lonna regularly and I saw (and see) Emily regularly. Then at the Ottawa Christmas social a couple years ago (I wasn't there, I've heard this second hand) some ladies got together, including Emily and Lonna. They introduce one another, and something clicked, and Emily goes "your RG's reference" or words to that effect. Emily emailed me afterwards saying she met Lonna and knows why I like her. I told Lonna and she said Emily is a great lady. Then the subject was broached. Lonna asked me if I would ask Emily if they could do a duo together. So "gulp" nervously I emailed Emily, and said Lonna would like to do a duo with you. Emily replied "sure, sounds like fun" Now it took time and scheduling but my ménage a trois virginity was taken by two ladies I knew quite well through our individual intimate encounters. And while Emily and Lonna had never been duo partners before they felt comfortable enough with one another and I guess with me too so we had a ménage. And as sappy as it sounds, there wasn't a client in the hotel room that night, nor were there any SP's, it really was three friends getting together. Footnote, and sort of sad note (for me at least), that was Lonna's last encounter before she retired. But what a lady, she kept our date for the ménage knowing she was retiring. And Emily and I gave her, her retirement gift and a birthday cake. And I was corrupted when the word sploshing was shouted out. No details but chocolate cake never tasted oh so good, and yes there were crumbs left in the bed. Anyhow the purpose of this novel is two ladies you see individually, and who like one another socially but never have been duo partners together, or at all, may be great together. The key in my opinion is trust and everyone is able to be comfortable together intimately A long winded rambling, bringing back very fond memories RG

I'm just back home from a weekend escape, my first two encounters since August 30, 2013 still feeling great. The highlight of these past two days is seeing Kylie Daniels for a second long overdue encounter and Emily Rushton for (well I've lost count how many encounters) Both Kylie and Emily are wonderful and terrific ladies, seeing them was the highlight of the past two days and I also want to say THANK YOU to both of them for a great weekend Recommendations will be forthcoming this week Kylie and Emily, again THANK YOU :-) RG

It is after great thought and consideration that I have decided that it is time to announce that I will be leaving the Massage business. I would like to thank all of you for the wonderful memories and I will never forget the kindness of you all. Thank you for teaching me so much about myself this business and how wonderful the world can be. CERB is a Great Community filled with wonderful people, and I am thankful that I have had the opportunity to experience some of that greatness. All that being said that I will be retiring from the business at the end of February, So you still have some time to live all of your Tiff Dreams :wink: I'll be here at Angel's Touch This week: Sunday January 19th 3:30pm-9:00pm Next Week Friday January 24th 3:30pm-11:00pm or Sunday January 26th 10:00am-9:00pm then I'll keep you in touch for future days To reach me Call Angels at 613-274-7073 Text me at 613-277-4328 or Send me a PM here on CERB Hope to see you all soon for some Kisses Tiff XoX

I met my current established duo partner through a suggestion by a gentleman who had seen us both. He had seen us each on our own, so he knew what we were like, and he asked us each individually. She and I were open to it, met for a coffee, and the rest is history. I have received an occasional request from a prospective client, who I have never met, to offer a duo with a lady I have also never met. I decline. There is no harm in asking a lady, as of course each lady has her own opinions. But I would recommend knowing each lady first... a duo is the best when there is a comfort level there, coming in not knowing the other parties can be, awkward.

Duo etiquette rules: 1. Choose providers who either have seen each other naked or can stomach seeing each other naked. 2. Choose providers of the same species or genus. For example, do not ask if a provider will work with a chia pet, velociraptor or plank of wood as a duo partner. 3. If you have a kink about clothing, make sure that one or both of the providers do not show up in the same outfit you are wearing. One of you is going to look better and the other will cry just a little bit. 4. Establish well before the encounter who gets to be Batman, who gets to be Robin and who gets to be Alfred the butler. You can't have two Batmans. That's an international convention. 5. Establish a bacon friendly environment. Everyone loves bacon and if they don't, they can't be part of the duo. 6. If you own an iguana and it is fed through an ingenious contraption that automatically dispenses food onto an an awaiting plate, make sure that both providers see and understand. Everyone needs to know about reptile dish function. (or was that erectile dysfunction??? Maybe I heard it wrong.) 7. Gifts are nice but be equal in the distribution. You can't give a bottle of champagne to one provider and a package of lime jello to the other. 8. Nobody is allowed to fart. That's against the rules. 9. If you are playing Risk as part of the encounter, always remember to establish in Australia and secure Siam. That's a guaranteed 3 extra guys every turn. Duo chicks dig Risk. 10. Margarine should never be used as part of a fantasy. Always use premium dairy products, not corn or other vegetable based substitutes. 11. There is no 11, please proceed to 12. 12. I was kidding about 11, there is no 12. 13. Skip the clown fetish. It's weird and will freak EVERYBODY out. 14. Lube and crazy glue should never be kept in the same drawer. Trust me on that. 15. If you are new to the duo game, please don't send pictures of your penis to either partner. You'll get penis cooties and be unable to perform. ... that's what I have so far.... but then again, I am tired.

Your MD can actually measure your testosterone levels and do other medical tests. Most, perhaps all, of the required tests are covered by OHIP. You might want to see your MD first because you might have a hidden medical issue that you are not aware of. I sent a client with this issue to the MD and medical problems requiring treatment were found. Never hurts to get a through and detailed check up. When was your last complete physical exam? Assuming your MD declares that you are OK, you might want to try the happy little blue pill. It will do wonders for your confidence so that you should be able to get off the pill after a period of time. I have seen that work in several people. I have several graduates in this area. Your MD can even give you a few free samples and run medical tests to be sure that you are OK to take it. Can't beat a free sample, right? Lastly, over the long term, keep applying for other jobs so that you can move to another environment where you will have less stress. Some managers are much better managers than others. Good luck to you. Persistence helps in all matters including this one. Best regards, Valerie

that she is :icon_wink:

You know I love it! 26 years old, 5"8', legs that won't quit, an oh so spank-able ass, blue eyes, long blond hair. Sensual Massage, Body slides, showers together, MSOG everything you've been dreaming about! 100% Independent.... So I do what I want! Conveniently located private and discreet lavish accommodations in Downtown Ottawa. Schedule Monday 10am to 10pm Wednesday 10am to 10pm Thursday 10am to 10pm Friday 5pm to 10pm. Outcall Only Special Click Here for details Saturday 11am to 6pm Sunday 12pm to 4pm (24hrs advance booking only) For more information and pictures, see my website at http://www.jessicamassage.com & also contact me. Call: 613-482-1553 Text Message: 613-909-8336 Click here to book online.

I had the same problem. Thank you guys

Wow! I thought I was the only one. People would make so much fun of me for this. I finally have company!! French Vanilla There is a drink that a friend of mine makes with mango juice mixed with rum or vodka or something with alcohol in it. It tastes fantastic.

Happy Birthday, Old Dog. Glad to hear you had an awesome birthday weekend.

A wonderful and happy Bday! Hope you get to do lots of the things I am thinking of real soon. And work isn't one of those lol!

Best wishes Old Dog, and have a prompt recovery! toine

Happy Birthday!! So haw many is this in dog years? lol....have a great day:)

Happy B-day Old Dog! Enjoy!

Happy Birthday you amazing man! Good luck with your gallbladder gift, we know bacon will be on your mind. Then maybe a couple bacon wrapped ladies...

Happy birthday old dog!... Hope it's a great one.... Cheers.

Happy Birthday Old Dog.... Sending bacon filled wishes your way....

Happy Birth Day OD :) hope we can have you around and celebrate many more for a long time! Kisses

Egg Nog. I'm not ashamed.

Interesting bunch of drinks there Cleo !! May I suggest..... ? We drink the coffee together first. Then throw the rest of that stuff you mentioned into a big big big bowl. Throw in some strawberries and a whole bunch of fruit and the two of us have a Yukka Flux partay and drink and eat er up :) Then dine on that evil and delicious treat Kathryn Bardot ;) mmmm hmmm hehehe Woof !

Hmm, Where is my credit for that one? ;)

Hockey Mashed potatoes or baked?

I spend my evening in the company of Charlie Hunnam "Jax" from the show Sons of Anarchy, and I must admit after meeting other members of the show he is the most genuine person on the show. We talked like we knew each other for a long time, I got is autograph on some shirts and on a huge wall banner. This was a big highlight for my day yesterday.

Sorry to hijack for a second, but Canada is actually much more ethnically and culturally diverse than the USA. :) Your statement is misleading and a poor generalization. This lady's photo might be stolen, but that doesn't mean that all ladies with a certain body type are "likely to be stolen" as well. http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2013/07/18/the-most-and-least-culturally-diverse-countries-in-the-world/ http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/05/16/a-revealing-map-of-the-worlds-most-and-least-ethnically-diverse-countries/ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_ranked_by_ethnic_and_cultural_diversity_level

Ohhhh wait... there are more rules. 16. At no point should you say this: "Hey, I have a Great Dane and a fresh jar of peanut butter." 17. Rule # 16 still applies even though your fantasy involves cosplay as Shaggy, Daphne and Velma. 18. Safe words should always be in a language that is understood and pronounceable by all parties. Klingon and Romulan safe words are not to be used. 19. Screaming "BOOOOOOBIES" and running around giggling after you see boobies is not cool. So I have been told. A lot. Okay... I like boobies. A lot. With 4 naked boobies in the room, even though you are in heaven you must remain composed, cool and debonair. Even though you really really want to yell "BOOOOOOBIES" and run around and giggle. Stay cool. Remember there will be the same reaction when you see a double set bums and vajajays. 20. You can only utter, "RELEASE the KRAKEN!!!!" once during an encounter. Plan the use of the phrase wisely. 21. If hosting, please be mindful of the fact that duo play causes more physical exertion than single play. With that in mind, extra drinks and perhaps a second bacon dish should be available for mid-session refreshments. 22. Everyone should have the opportunity to wear the unicorn mask. 23. No, you should never wear the leopard print spandex pants. They're just not... um.... you. 24. You may be a talented ventriloquist, but nobody wants to hear your penis talk. 25. When engaging in small talk, avoid all controversial subjects at all costs. Remember, you are in the room with two women. If they disagree with you, you would be twice as wrong as before.If you're twice as wrong, you get twice less sex. If you get twice less sex, you have to masturbate twice and cry twice as loudly when you do. 26. Remember that you are an adult. Never, ever say, "Neener neener neener, I'm just giving HER my wiener." The non-wiener recipient may stab you. Not saying that it would happen, just saying that it COULD. 27. Ben Affleck has seen every single possible duo combination. Some rate him highly, some rate him poorly. Don't talk about Ben Affleck. It's safer that way. 28. Make sure that you go to the bathroom several times before your duo arrives. Girls spend a lot of time in the bathroom doing mysterious and magical things, as well as peeing. You are dealing with not just one mysterious, magical peeing woman but two. You may not be able to get back into the bathroom for several hours or days. Keep that in mind. 29. All persons involved, not just the service providers, including the client must be able to sing along with Bohemian Rhapsody. The test of a successful encounter is the ability to harmonize at all points with the late Freddy Mercury. I shouldn't have to do this, but to help in your encounter, here are the lyrics: "Bohemian Rhapsody" Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality. Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see, I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy, Because I'm easy come, easy go, Little high, little low, Anyway the wind blows doesn't really matter to me, to me. Mama, just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, Pulled my trigger, now he's dead. Mama, life had just begun, But now I've gone and thrown it all away. Mama, ooh, Didn't mean to make you cry, If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters. Too late, my time has come, Sends shivers down my spine, Body's aching all the time. Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go, Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth. Mama, ooh (anyway the wind blows), I don't wanna die, I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all. I see a little silhouetto of a man, Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning, Very, very frightening me. (Galileo) Galileo. (Galileo) Galileo, Galileo Figaro Magnifico. I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me. He's just a poor boy from a poor family, Spare him his life from this monstrosity. Easy come, easy go, will you let me go? Bismillah! No, we will not let you go. (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go. (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go. (Let me go!) Will not let you go. (Let me go!) Never, never let you go Never let me go, oh. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, mama mia, mama mia (Mama mia, let me go.) Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me. So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh, baby, can't do this to me, baby, Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here. (Oh, yeah, oh yeah) Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Nothing really matters, Nothing really matters to me. Anyway the wind blows. 30. Practice makes perfect. No the duo part, but the Queen part. Remember the appropriate amount of head banging at the guitar solo enhances everything. I'm sure there's more....

While I've always been a lurker on this site (sorry guys), I've definitely had the pleasure of spending time with Ksenia. I first visited without knowing what she looked like, but was instantly wowed by her beauty and amazing personality. She really knows what she's doing on the massage table, and can carry on a great conversation all the while. So much so that I was back again in no time.

Yes I've seen her a couple of times, nice girl, photos are accurate, she's very accommodating and easy to get along with. She is very tiny though, like she could easily fit in your pocket! That said I had a great time with her twice, pretty decent no hands bbj as I recall, but I'm not sure we clicked, her size and youth may have been a factor on my part, nothing to do with her she's both attractive and a quality provider. I meant to do a write up but guess I forgot. Saw her back in November, as mentioned she only seems to advertise later in the evening like 10pm and only every now and then, like tonight her ad is up right now! Go for it!

I have not seen her and have had no luck booking her -- she seems to only be available very late in the evening (her ads pop up around midnight or 2 a.m.). She is real and worked for the agency Pink Kitty for a short time. I have met an escort who is friends with her and at the time Roxi was working in the hotel room next door, and her friend did verify her identity.

I don't think assumptions about his motivations are necessary. His inquiry isn't that off base as I have had young female providers ask me the very same question because they couldn't understand how I could command double what they asked and book more calls than they did. It's comes from the naive view that great sex is only for the young by the young and is a belief held until one day you look in the mirror and you're not young anymore but still sexual! Let's allow him the opportunity to grow a little bit in the awareness that great sex is ageless and starts in the brain, not the body... cat

Hi, I'm a mature provider,happily so.Although I do what I have to to market myself. This isn't a business that is kind to aging, nor are some involved in it. But in saying that I don't believe mature means "top bookers, better quality, etc, neither do I think because a provider is young that she'll be more in demand, better looking, etc. Cerb has some gorgeous, incredibly built mature women, some that can certainly hold their own!! I don't like to think one versus the other either, we all have our fans, no one is better than or less than, just different. It's best to have that frame of mind when it comes to most things:) But if your experiences, tastes are swayed towards younger then enjoy and embrace that but don't compare, there's just no need to:)

Welcome aboard Damian709. I have to agree with nlwoodchuck on this one. I've made a couple of posts myself that drew a lot of heat so you have to be careful how you word things here and the tone of your post. For myself, I found a very awesome young lady that I spend most of my time with... so yes, I have to say my current choice is younger ladies. However, don't get me wrong and think that has always been my choice. I have met some very, very attractive, intelligent, and experienced older ladies that blew my doors off. I think that every age has something different to offer and in most cases, the older ladies have the experience to detect what you need and provide that without asking. I'm sure if I had the time, I would love to meet some of the older ladies on CERB. The best way to decide is to just look around. If you see some pictures that draw your attention, you've jumped the first hurdle... you see something you like. Forget about the age thing and take a look at her profile, check out some of her posts, and browse her albums and recommendations. I'm sure you'll find ladies of ALL ages here, very stimulating. Make some comments on pics and maybe post something on her profile. Who knows, maybe she'll make some contact back and you're off to the races. Bottom line is, do not let the age of any ladies here make the decision for you. Go with visual, intellectual, and what your heart feels. I have to warn you though. ALL the ladies here on CERB are incredibly beautiful and very stimulating. You're going to have a hard time picking your first one. hehe Good luck :-)

Damian709, As I'm from you're neck of the woods so I'll welcome you to cerb. The quality or success (what I assume you mean by top bookers) of a companion has nothing to do with age. It has all to do with how that lady interacts with her clients and the experience that she provides. If your "experience" has been that YOU have enjoyed your time with younger ladies more than mature ladies then that's great. Stick with what works for you. I personally have had some of MY best experiences with ladies that would be considered (lol) older. Their intellect and innate ability to understand what I as a client need has been no doubt brought on by their experience and the understanding that the experience is not just about sex. For your first post you decided to poke a bit of a potential hornets nest so please be careful. I recommend that you take your time and read the whole newbie area and become familiar with cerbs rules and tone. It might save you from getting stung. Hmmmm.......ending a post with "what do you think?" seems a little familiar to me, not sure why. Best of luck

I'm a mature provider as well...I don't consider myself a top booker. I consider myself a selective booker. ;) most mature ladies do. We consider quality time over quanity appointments.

Welcome to Cerb, Damien :) To get this conversation started, maybe you could tell us why, in your experience, "younger ladies are better service providers". What does "younger versus "older" mean to you, personally? As far as your first question, I am not certain I understand what it means. Care to expand on the meaning of "top booker"? Thanks :) Additional Comments: Just another question... What makes an SP a good one/a better one in your books?

If I was a man, I'd go wherever my boner was pointing me ;)

Masturbate and eat cheezies......which explains the orange penis......at least I hope it does...........

I try hard to always be positive but when something happens that does get me stressed or feeling worried I get relieve by eating, eating junk food usually, the more the better. Food is good for a lot of things, lol.

I was told to take her clothes off... she really didn't like the fact that I tried them on in the first place.