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More bear than man, hfxandy is the perfect Fat Bastard companion for you to cozy up to as the weather turns colder. Hfxandy misplaced his razor a month ago and now sports a full beard. With piercing blue eyes, this Celtic cutie will charm his way into your refrigerator. Book now before his farmer's tan fades. Not yet 30 years old, hfxandy has the stamina to ensure at least a SSOG and boundless enthusiasm to compensate for his awkward fumbling with your bra clasp. Offers a complete BFE, and Fat Bastard's newest option, CHUNK service. Operates out of the Fat Bastard BBM Halifax satellite office, outcalls to Dartmouth require an additional fee to pay the cost of the harbour ferry. He speaks decent English, terrible French and pretty reasonable Chiac to service any visiting ladies. Not a clockwatcher, he will not leave until you are completely satisfied or you forcibly eject him. Offers PWAC (Pay What You Can) service and will bring a Frequent Client Card. Buy 5 sessions, get one free. Also accepts leftovers, bathtub gin and obscure Japanese pop records in lieu of cash.

Came back from vacation and first thing I noticed was that the Visitor's box was missing, found this thread and I agree with most people that I'm curious about who visits my profile as well. It's a shame that one bad apple causes a feature most of us like to be temporarily removed until a solution is found. I suggest that the MOD add the visitor's box to the User CP section, this way nobody can see who visited your profile other than yourself. Personally when I visit somebody else's profile I've never even paid too much attention to who else visited their profile, its none of my business.

yes it will be one of those other sappy post:) I have been on Cerb for pretty much 2 years no (despite what my joining date say, it was a fuck up)...it has its up and down. up and down... I've been extremely annoyed at people, wanting to almost strangle them, ,some people make me cry of joy...learn that well being an Escort isn't being a street walker, or the high end class escort at 1000$/hr ( I though you only had those type when I first join). I've made some friends, whatever SP or hobbiests... Sometime I feel like saying, screw you Cerb, I hate your drama (cause there is plenty of it on here), but I still keep coming back because, well it's an amazing advertising tool and I can't be judge like a piece of meat, like some other erb website...it's a place where I get to voice my opinions and not be judge for it (well ok sometime I am)... I just want to thanks all those amazing people that have been in my life, private or escort-ing life for the past 2 years, most of you did touch me in a nice way, or random way that I still remember you BOOBIES FOR ALL:D and here is one of my random and brutally honest post:D

So after seeing one of the SP a day before (she was just visiting Ottawa and wanted to meet up) I am thinking I should take the plunge again. I call up few indies and they are busy. I see the ad for duos. I am very much in the mood so I call CC and tell them I would like to book a duo with Maya and Nina. They tell me that duo won't be ready until later in the evening as ladies are not at the location yet. Now, what do I do. I tell them will call later. I try to call other ladies again but no luck. So I say to myself "Lets wait for a bit no harm." I call CC again and book a duo with Maya and Nina. Now how to kill time? I decide to park my baby at my house and take a cab. I am at the location but still about 2 hours to go. So I go to Barbellas to kill time. Meet with an amazing dancer called "Latouya". Get about 400 bucks of dancing and having a few beers. Then grab some other dancers to kill time. My time has come to visit two wonderful ladies. I arrive at their place and they are welcome me by kissing me and kissing each other (WOW). Then we have a wonderful time (Will post the rec). After three hours of continuously doing it. I want to extend but I get a call from my friend. He tells me he has a friend visiting from out of town and they are doing bbq and wants me to join them. I say alright. I thank the girls for the wonderful 3 hours and leave. Get home, shower and go to bbq. For some reason we all decide that we have to go hit the pub. So we look around for who will be the designated driver. No one volunteers and phone calls to blueline are made. 2 cabs arrive and all the boys leave together. At the pub we are drinking and a really hot girl (Lets call her Ms. X) comes up to me and strikes up conversation. I am thinking huh? me really? May be its the threesome I just had probably giving out some kind of sex vibe. The hell I care, I start talking to her and get her number. After boozing and chatting up all the boys have found someone to talk to. My buddy comes up to me and says "Man, she is hot, did you get her number yet?" I show him the napkin. He winks at me gives me the guns and goes to the bar to get another drink. I just give a missed call to Ms. X so she has my number too. I go to bar to get another drink. Apparently Ms. X thinks that she missed my call. She comes up to me and says "you miss me already huh?". I say YES (my brain is thinking lets get going). She smiles and tells me to wait. She gets her purse and tells me "lets get going". I am thinking WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED. I say ALRIGHTY THEN. We grab a cab to my place. I order some take out open up some wine bottles at home we chat for a bit and then KABOOM. I think I will be able to handle it after the duo. I am a little scared for my reputation now. In the bedroom, in the kitchen, in the bathroom, in the living room hey my reputation is ALRIGHT. We are both tired after several hours of making love. We go to bed. In the morning we have a quickie and then leave for work. I am exhausted. I don't feel like working so take off early. Get a text from Ms. Vansweet that she is in town. I am thinking, Holyshit I can't have sex anymore. I tell her I am busy. I didnt mean to be rude but the way I texted her seemed a bit rude. So I call her to tell her that I really can't. I hear her voice and her accent and KABOOM by boys are ready again. I tell her fine lets meet for an hour. As soon as I enter her location, I am horny again, she is just so sexy. I say fine lets see how far we can go and we can make the financial adjustment later. We go for three hours. DAMN. Apparently I can still do it. I say my good-byes. And leave. Now HONESTLY I am very curious to see whether I am able to get it going again. I call Ms. X and ask if she is willing to meet up again. She tells me she is way too tired after yesterday. But I am curious so I call PK ask who is working. They say CrystalX and Nathalia. I ask for CrystalX but she is busy. So I say fine, let me see Natalia for 2 hours. I go to meet Natalia and end up staying for 3 hours. Hmm...I am amused and shocked at the way my body has functioned. I look at the clock its 12 am. I say my good byes with Nathalia an grab a cab. I reach home at and around 12:30 I get a text from Ms. X that she wants to meet. I am thinking FUCK NO. Can't do it. I am exhausted. For some reason I text back yes come on over. She tells me she will be taking a cab. I say fine. She comes by we chat for a good hour about life etc...And then she sits on my lap starts kissing me. I kiss her back but I know I won't be able to do it. I am cursing myself for saying yes to her. Then she takes my hand and takes me to the bedroom. Makes me sit on the bed and slowly takes her clothes off winking and smiling. KABOOM. My boys are ready again. So we do it at least 6 times. She tells me she has her folks visiting her tomorrow and she will have to be home by at least 7 in the morning. I invite her to stay so I can drop her in the morning. We want to sleep but can't so we do it again. Then talk for a bit, its almost 6:30 am. I drop her around 7:30 am. I am come back, shower have my breakfast and write this story. So after continuously doing it for 3-4 days and down around $5K (including SPs, Strip Clubs, Pub, restaurants, LCBO, ect...) I am exhausted and I found out something about myself. I really want to share this story with my friends but can't because SPs are involved too. So I thought I might as well share it on cerb. Would really like to thank Maya, Nina, Vansweet and Nathalia for helping me discover somethig about myself. I will get to writing recs later now I really need to sleep.

A BIG Thank You to all you who congratulated me; it inspires me to contribute more! Funny, whenever I see: Dorinda Bloom - On the verge of..... I keep thinking Orgasm!

For your own safety... For many, many, many reasons, the details of your location should only be shared with the gentlemen you plan on spending time with... Play safe!

It's a secret and you will have to PM me to find out! ;)

New game to play!!! This one will be good way to get to know each other. I will start it off by saying something that I either have or have not done. The next person answers it by true or false. The person who wrote the statment can then pm or write on the other persons wall telling them if they where right. Then the person who answered true or false leaves there own true or false question. (Your T/F left can be about anything) Be creative, hehe I think this is a great way to get everyone communicating!! So here it goes... I once did it while driving down the highway. It was an old fashioned truck, with lots of room. so I jumped over and got on top. hehehe What a ride lol

*big hug to SNMD* Posted via Mobile Device

surf the extreme guitar player's name is nuno bettencourt and yes he is very good. i saw extreme live back in 92, his solo was amazing.

Wasn't I just congratulating you on 2000 posts like three days ago? ;) Yet another prolific Cerb-ite! Good work OD!

Yngwie Malmsteen baby!

These Carley Chase pics are outstanding, and bring back intense memories. Intense... http://www.carleychase.com/guests/gallery.html

I've been noticing Old Dog out and about around town lately. I snapped some pics. Here is on his way to work: Convertible the only way to go to snag the babes: Enjoying the last days of summer at the beach: After a long hard day, Old Dog doing his favourite thing: Napping.

The gym and healthy eating habits can definetly do it. I have a regular client who used to contact me about once a month then he started exercising hard and being really careful with his eating and now its atleast twice a week and much longer sessions! Crazy what healthy living can do to a persons sex drive. Posted via Mobile Device

Here we have it, a white dress shirt and a neck tie, it doesn't get much better than this:

Mmm anyone else notice a similarity?

Well, good for you as long as its not cocaine-induced (smile). That would not end well.

OD, is it time for Christmas boobies already? My how time flies!

Congratulations Dorinda on number 500 Looking forward to reading many more RG

Congratulations, Dorinda! Looking forward to many more!

And then there's Nancy Wilson, of Heart. Best female guitar player, ever.

Greek food, greek salad, greek dressing.. "I'd like to go for greek" All I can think of.. well you know ;)

I was checking out Kijiji for possible incall locations for the new year, and I found one on a street called "Shillington." I'm sure more than a few of you would chuckle if I told you my location was on Shillington LOL!

After a recent hospital visit: Head Nurse.......

I love it! Cum all over me, make it look like some sort of weird modern art. I love the taste of cum *most of the time and for me nothing is hotter then having my partner get off, it makes me cum. Posted via Mobile Device

I must respectfully disagree. For me, first and formost, I want what's between a ladies ears, and if the other fun & naughty parts come with it too, all the better. Malika, I hope this doesn't count as drama! :)

I am so sorry to hear this, it such a shame people can't mind their own buisness. The positive side is you will probably find a new situation that is even better for you. Love and light to you and your situation. xo

Well, I think that Cerb rocks in a major way! There's drama, there are arguments, a cat-fight breaks out occasionally. Some days one needs hip-waders just to get through the men's pissing contests. In other words: it's a lot like "real" life. I've been on the interwebs for eons. Seriously, I have. Back when my first computer was a box of parts and a manual that was missing most of the pages 'cuz no one had gotten around to writing them yet. Online communities started to spring up, attached to various electronic bulletin boards, and they were fascinating places to be. MUDDs, MUDXes and other virtual worlds came along. History was made as we figured out what we wanted to do and be online. I was at LambdaMOO when Mr. Bungle created his voodoo doll and committed the first rape in cyberspace; he was subsequently toaded. It was all very dramatic and pathetic, full of fantasy and banality. Like life can be, anywhere. So, here is a lot like other places, but it's also different. At least it is these days. Change is the only constant, after all. Even so, we've yet to see the equivalent of a drive-by shooting. Other boards have been shamefully infected with evil spirits that have tried to drive some hard-working women out of the business, just because a certain faction wanted to see if they could do it. In too many cases, they succeeded in breaking not just careers, but communication, authenticity and comradeship. Notice that women don't speak up too much on those boards? 'Nuff said! Here at Cerb, we squabble and kvetch, sometimes, but we're good to each other a lot of the time, too. Very good--reputation points, nominations, sweet notes on guestbooks... it all adds up to something. Which is a lot in a place that's mostly made of ones and zeros, where nobody gives out their real name. You can hide your identity in cyberspace, but you can't hide much else. If you come out here, you'll find out who you are and you'll have to deal with that, one way or another. Here, where all we have are the words we string together, our words will save, reward or kill us. It's a great place, Cerb. Great folks are here. AND there's sex, too!

We all have our good and bad days and the same goes for our days with this board. At the end of the day you take the good with the bad and you pull through, some days are amazing others you want to just snap. All in all it is worth it for what you as an individual gets from this community. This board is unlike any other out there.

First Way to Go Malika! I too am just over 2 yrs here as well. I probably was more active in posting a few months back. Some of the 'drama' recently and frankly disrepctful posts turn me off and as in life...on CERB I too just take the higher ground and try and stay out of it. But I think those highs and lows can be expected. I am sensing we're on a more positive trend now. Regardless CERB remains a great tool for me to find women I value and respect and who can bring something positive into my life. I have also communicated thru posts/chat with some guys who I've found I share a common bond with. As long as that stays...so will I. Cub

As many of you know I have not been on CERB much in the last month and a half. The reason for that is that I had some sort of infection that affected my right hand mainly in the wrist. I have been at the hospital first and took Xrays and been on intravenous for a week and then to my family doctor who referred me to a specialist who got bone scans and MRI and blood work done. All the results came back negative for anything wrong but in the meantime I was taking anti inflamatory, anti biotics and such, my stomach could not take it anymore and neither could I. I have decided to go with non conventional medicine and seek the help of the acupuncture. I have been there 3 times in the last week and now can type on my keyboard with both hands. I would like you all imagine what it would be like to not being able to use your right hand for anything. I could not brush my teeth, shower properly, squeeze a shampoo bottle, dry myself, shake my hands to remove water after washing them, start my vehicle, cook my food, cut my meat, and all the fun thing about sex like masturbate, slap a bum, fingering etc. I'm on my way to a speedy recovery and I'm very happy, I will ride my motorcycle for the first time in over 2 months.

Happy belated Birthday Dorinda, Hugs and kisses, NJ

Happy happy Birthday!

Hope you have a great day!! :D

Happy Birthday hot stuff! Posted via Mobile Device

Best wishes to you Dorinda! :)

Happy Birthday Dorinda ! Hope your entire day is a blast and leaves you smiling ! Wish I was there to get naked with you under them sheets ;)

Happy birthday beauty, get naked!!!

Meeting my new baby! He can't come home with me just yet but I am so excited!!!

I absolutely love wearing neckties, but I especially love how sexy women look in neckties (of all shapes, sizes, and colours!) This thread has definitely inspired me to take some pictures of my own... ;) In the meantime, I find Tilda Swinton very striking in a tie. She's quite lovely in how she plays with gender. A radical, she is!

I'm sure there are lots of subtleties that I'm missing, but couldn't one of the agencies add a private password protected area to one of their web sites, where they could share all the bad date info with the other agencies, and invite all the CERB SPs to join in as well?

Ladies: Catch a glimpse of the Fat Bastard's In-call Community: Oh and you can buy one of these at the giftshop:

While yes a bad date could happen to anyone, a potential client who has been screened properly with name, place of work,etc is less likely to do anything other than know show, knowing that the lady has his information and she verified it sort of makes one think twice about trying something stupid. All the extra time and effort into screening pays off, as you cant put a price on your life or safety.

As I recall you had access to the bad date area in the past and you wrecked it for yourself and were voted out. In my opinion you, you not following the rules wrecked it for the privilege of other agencies to be allowed in. We as independents hold one another accountable for the information we provide in our area, if any one abuses it we vote on it. At the end of the day we gave you a chance and you blew it. This is not something that I want to risk having my safety jeopardized for as the information needs to be 100% private at all times. The sick thing is, if everyone took more time to screen any potential client there would be fewer or hardly any bad dates.

Found this review on another site: I called up Fat Bastard BBM last night for an outcall to my house. One of the inglorious bastards showed up immediately. He proceeded to inspect my fridge, whereupon he procured a case of beer, which he consumed while waiting for a pizza that he ordered to arrive. Upon the pizza's arrival, he informed me that he did not have his wallet and insisted that I pay the driver. After consuming half the pizza, he unzipped his pants and passed out on the couch, snoring loudly. He is still there. He may no longer be breathing, but I am afraid to check. Nonetheless, I would repeat.

f %$*ING road trip to Halifax! WOW what a duo! :jackoff: Sizzling,smoking hot sexy ladies that really love the wild side, in the boudoir!