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I think you have been missing the point that has been expressed so many times in this thread, but I will express it one more time: *Ladies working in this industry face violence at an exponential rate in comparison to Gents who hobby.* How do you know I'm not some sicko? Well, do your research! A reputable lady who has reviews and has been around for awhile with no complaints is your best bet! Wow, talk about stigma and prejudice! If you think a lady may have severe mental problems, don't book with her. It is my experience that the quality providers with the strictest screening also have the best head on their shoulders. Then don't book with the ladies who request it, and stop complaining about those of us who are proactive about our safety. Again, it's your choice, but don't expect us to be heartbroken or complain.

Sorry, but this whole "two way Street" argument seems to only be taken as far as you would like it to, to prove your point. Gentlemen: most of you are amazing so please ignore this as it is just to prove my point. Frankly, how do I not know that maybe YOU are mentally unstable and maybe wont take the info you know about me to the extreme? Say you visit me and during the session I dont provide something that you are very insistant on, such as bbbj. Fine. So you leave, unhappy, and lose your shit and flip! You now have my location, which can obviously reveal my REAL FULL name, my website info, my contact info, etc. Who is to say that just because I didn't Blow You without a condom that you wont reveal all my info and slander my name and put me at risk. Because of your UNSTABLE MIND I have just lost MY LIVELYHOOD, all my security of my incall. and I'm put at Extreme risk. You could easily STEAL FROM ME when you visit me(or after), BLACKMAIL ME with the threat of exposing my job, etc. Nice TWO WAY STREET huh? NEVER use mental health as a reason as a way to take it to an extreme and insult someone. It's ugly and uncalled for, as you can now see. We are in the same spot you are. If you can't trust others because of YOUR EXTREME PARANOIA and NARCISSISM, than why in the world would I trust you and invite you into my home? What makes you so important that I would pretty much destroy my whole career just to SPITE you?! It seems to me that you've lost site of the fact that to you, this is a hobby. It provides you with a luxury that you desire. To me, this is my livelyhood, my job. Not something I do for entertainment.

No one is saying your safety is less important. What people are trying to say is you do take FAR less risk. You, as a client, are never taking as much risk as your escort. And my life is far more important than your name. You might get ripped off, be put on a black list... But I may be chopped up into little pieces and dumped into a ditch, not only losing my life, but deeply hurting those who are close to me. It's not nice and even I don't like thinking about it, but it's a reality. To this day there are serial killers out there, uncaught, taking their anger out on prostitutes of all types. (street, escort, ect.) When a client says and acts like he is taking more risk than I am, it's completely thoughtless.

For those of you using the "it's a two way street," "clients are at risk too" type excuses, blah blah blah. Give me a break. The risk that you will victimize me is much much greater than the risk that I might rip you off. There is a much greater risk that you'll use my name to out me, harass me, stalk me, etc than there is that I will use it to ruin your life. Let's get real. And for those of you using the "oh, but what if she publishes my name on a bad date list" excuse: There are two sides to every story and you probably did something to deserve it. Straight up. It's much more likely that you were a dickhead than it is that she was trying to be vindictive. I hate these conversations. My safety is more important than your precious name. /end rant

The decision of whether to give a full and real name if asked is entirely up to the individual. If it is requested, and for your own personal reasons you choose not to do so, then so be it and accept it. I know that I am fortunate in that I do not have any reason whereby I need to protect my identity from anyone in regards to this, SP's, friends or family. I would prefer that my friends and family not know, but if they find out then I am totally comfortable that they would understand. That in itself is a rather sad statement isn't it, that this activity because of social "norms," is best left unstated. We have a long way to go don't we, and I mean both ladies and men with that. Regardless I wish to reiterate something written earlier. Whatever is required by a SP that will alleviate their concern for their own personal safety is valid. If their requirement does not meet your comfort level, then there are alternatives I am sure, and one should respect their wishes and efforts that they make to ensure their own personal safety. IT is THEIR space, THEIR identity and THEIR body and from my perspective THEY have a great deal more to lose than I should they not take basic common sense precautions. It has been said, and I can see it in post after post, in forum after forum, that the vast majority of men here are discreet, respectful, and people that any of us would be proud to call a friend. Let's not lose that in the discussion. Again, ladies, be careful and do what you need to do to be secure.

If I was a guy... I'd ask my escort to wear a simple outfit, underneath a black bra and panties (cotton, not lace), but when we're done.. she'd be wearing my white dress shirt, buttons undone... left shoulder bare... hair messy... makeup a little smeared... smoking a cigarette.

Wow ... People are getting really cranky. To the guys: don't argue with the ladies over this ... They have every right to make this a requirement, and I understand why having heard many stories from the ladies that make me shiver or at least make me look at the floor in disbelief that a guy could be that mean. As I said, I would never complain about a lady insisting on this; I would simply, and respectfully, choose not to see her. To the ladies: don't argue with the guys that want to be discrete and not share that information. And I would never ask a lady for their personal information. And don't denigrate guys who have a legitimate concern about privacy. Comparing privacy (guys) versus safety (gals) is an apples to oranges comparison and neither can claim a higher moral ground BUT both need to be equally, and completely, respected.

We're invading your privacy asking for your name, but you do not see that we are taking you into our very private homes and incall locations? Honestly, no one gives a shit who you are, we just want the peace of mind of knowing that if you rape us, rob us, harass us, stalk us, or otherwise hurt us, we have some way of dealing with the situation. And while I'm at it, please quit spreading such vicious BS--Sex workers are not all mentally ill and if you think one of us is, then don't book with her, but don't tar us all with the same brush. If the risks are so great to you, then why are you hobbying in the first place? There is some serious narcissism going on here, and as I said above, no one really gives a shit who you are.

When you start a thread, be prepared ANYONE with an opinion to reply!

As I read more of this thread as it unfolds, couple more thoughts. First, at least for me, I do not see any ladies that I would be embarrassed/ashamed if someone found out I saw them...in short I see ladies...and if your embarrassed/ashamed by seeing ladies or the ladies you see, maybe you shouldn't see them Second, and this seems so simple a concept. If you don't or won't trust a lady with your name, why should the lady trust you to be alone with you, intimately Just a couple more thoughts. RG

To me an encounter is more, much more, than sex alone. The intimacy, the passion, the connection of mind and body is a huge stimulant...a high if you will. When I connect with a lady I mean REALLY connect with her the feeling I experience is unlike any drug. A mental connection is imperative, I can not stress this enough. A keen mind and a positive, confident personality is a major turn on for me. Without conversation and the connection it establishes sex is just sex. When intelligence, wit, humour and confidence are introduced sex is no longer just sex, it becomes a passion for mind and body. So yes, to me an encounter is much more than just a penis and a vagina getting together for some fun!

Not a problem for me.....If it puts your S.P at ease your experience should be that much more enjoyable....Tks

Hmmmm. One thing that is glaringly missing here, unless I missed it; is that we are doubly at risk. You are coming into an SP's home. You know the location, or you wouldn't be there. Whats to say YOU don't do a reverse lookup with the address? You then also have the SP's land line number and their real name if the account is in their name. That is another risk we take. So I "share" my calendar with one person. They know who and when I am seeing someone. No last names, just first. Outcalls require that I make a call once there and when I'm leaving or a return call will occur. Most of the Gents I see are regulars and truly gentlemen in their demeanor. Some I do know the names of, some personal info they choose to share and after a time I share as well. My life before my newish career was fairly pedestrian so I have few skeletons hanging around. Some Hobbiests also consider a regular SP their Muse if they trust and click well with each other. I respect all my visitors, regular or otherwise, and their requirements to ensure they can continue being a Hobbiest. The only thing I can say, is please don't ask me to call you by your CERB handle. Some of you are very clever or witty or downright funny; and if you hit the sweet spot, I'll lose it calling you Lunchtimelickerisme or something. Be careful, or I'll decide your name myself if you do that! :wink:

Ahhh Yes, I replied only once, and did so with grace and integrity. I also wished them best of luck in there new business:) LOL

What do you want, a certificate from our doctor? Do you question the sanity of contractors who come into your home to do work? Of the person who delivers your paper? The person who cuts your hair? It's offensive to question our sanity just because of our chosen occupation. You're perpetuating the stigma that sex workers are mentally ill. If you really think there is a good chance that we are manipulative, vindictive, mentally ill women, then why are you interested in spending your time and money on us?

It has been said already in this thread but I think it is central to the issue. In my opinion NB is a small niche market for an upscale SP. I love NB it has some awesome qualities that keep me here but a sophisticated, cosmopolitan, attitude towards sex trade workers and women in general is not something I find in abundance here. So in my opinion it is no surprise that the traveling SP trips are short. Part of the problem may come from how the local sex workers in NB operate. The agencies in particular offer this pizza style service that was talked about. The independents often follow the trend in my experience. This leaves us with a market of hobbyist that are unaccustomed or ignorant of the difference in the service offered by an upscale SP. Maybe these men go on to book appointments with a traveling SP using the same cavalier attitude they would when calling a local agency. This will obviously cause problems since there is a huge difference in the services that are being offered and the etiquette involved. I'm not trying to defend rude behavior but just trying to present a possible cause for it. Educating these people seems like the best solution. Pointing them to this site or others like it so they can become accustomed with what is expected. But like Miss Rushton pointed out some people are not going to 'get it'. Anyone who has ever worked in the service industry can attest to having met that customer that just makes you want to scream. These are the people who will not read the noobie section on cerb or the FAQ section on the SP's website. They are the real issue because how can you inform someone who remains willfully ignorant. What can be done about these people I don't know. I think it is a problem shared through out the service industry in general. I do think that creating a strong hobbyist community here in NB is a good start. To be inclusive instead of exclusive. If there is a great group of people at it's core then others will want to be part of it. At this point they can be educated....hopefully Don't give up hope on NB we're not all jerks

It's a matter of safety for both you and the companion. If she is asking, anyone else she has met or screened has had to provide the details. You are entering my personal space, whether a hotel or condo and I want to know who you are. Due to all the crap being pulled, screening process are getting a bit more strict with some ladies, and I being one of them, am sorry if you do not like it, but there is no way I will visit with the details. Personal safety is way more important to me than any amount of money.

Howdy ladies and gents. I guess I didn't do a good enough job promoting the return of the diary. I simply jumped on the thread that had 3,600 views stating that the diary was down, and changed the link in my signature along with a few discrete ads on CL. In the last few days I've received numerous PMs and emails from folks that didn't know about the new diary's return and new address. Guess I should give myself a failing grade on marketing the return of the cowboy's diary. It was down for a number of weeks due to some apparent issues with the terms of service, but after all the kind support and encouragement from the many readers here from cerb and other venues I decided to setup shop at a new home on the internet... if you haven't been there yet, check it out and bookmark http://www.cowboysdiary.info, be sure to tell your friends and family too. (ok maybe not your family) pardon me for this shameless plug :)

hey folks Just a quick note to all who happen to know me, some more intimately that others!!! Was diagnosed this week with bone cancer in the jaw, where they thought it was just a bad bone graft after trying to install a post for a bridge. Now on the list at the General for this new "laser knife", just not sure when (welcome to Ontario Health care), then probably some chemo or radiation. So I may be out of commission soon for a while, but will try and keep connected. If I have not reached out to you ladies, not because I did not want to!!! So in the meantime, play safe, play hard and of course.......lots of licks!!

Since the article does not mention a massage parlour, should this really be posted? Maybe she would rather her address not be posted here? Posted via Mobile Device

Mm I had a great first date the other day, we had some great mixed drinks (perks of dating a bartender) then he made me a delicious supper and we watched the original 3 Star Wars on the couch with his great dane. It was so good because socially we have known of eachother for 2 years and watching movies and talking together just gave us that chance to see who we actually were outside of public view. Posted via Mobile Device

Do you promise to have me up against the wall,strip search me and then frisk me from head to toe too ;)

On first glance, without really analyzing it, yes, the fear that your home or work life could be affected seems to be a valid reason to not provide your name But when you think it through, the ladies are doing this for their livelihood. They make money by being SP's. The fear that the lady will "out" you, why would a lady do that. She would soon lose clients, and consequently money If blackmail, she'd have to pick a rich guy, and most of us aren't rich, just have a little disposable income on hand And if your gut feeling is the lady you are seeing isn't trustworthy enough to know your name...don't see her. Just the same as the ladies won't see a guy if their gut feeling tells them not to Some more thoughts RG

It is part of the security system and not the entire security system itself. There are 2 issues here: identification and verification. If you have a pay-as-you-go phone with name "Mike Hunt" and you give your name as "Mike Hunt" you have identified yourself as "Mike Hunt" but not verified yourself as the "Mike Hunt". To uniquely verify yourself as the "Mike Hunt" another item is required, one which will filter out other "Mike Hunt". Work place contact, SP references are the typical items. Bottom line, security is a continuum and not just a black and white line and there are more moving parts then what is typically presented.

My two cents are that I have no problem giving my real name or number as I want the woman I am with to be relaxed and feel secure. If there is no trust or at least respect in the beginning I think the encounter won't be as special as it could be. I personally respect and sometimes can't believe the risks you SP's take. I know this may sound chauvinistic but I always perceived the risk as being much more yours than mine. I therefore would be willing to do all in my power to ease those risks. If it means for me to give you my name and number than I really have no problem with that. I think the last thing we here would like to see any of our wonderful SP's get into an ugly situation. Be safe people. Hope that was not too preachy.....just one guy's opinion.

What is the highlight of your encounter? is it the element of surprise? the anticipation that builds before meeting? the sex? the conversation? or? For me....It is the element of mental attraction. I have had the opportunity of a life time with some of the conversations that I have been fortunate to share with those I have encountered. What happens after that is always speech-less.

No, in all respects, your saftey is not more importants than mine. I don't have difficulty arrangeing appointments. I don't ask for real names. I give you mine, if you give me yours; but after we meet and only if you ask. Actually very few ladies ask after we meet, but I am O.K. if they want to share. chicas/chavez

I watched the entire two hours and as I type I am watching the pundits analyze the debate and it participants. As expected all four leaders performed as expected. Stephen Harper seemed to be a preprogrammed automaton constantly repeating the words coalition, economic recovery and Liberals raise taxes as he mechanically stared into the camera(s). Michael Ignatieff attempted to gain ground on health care and corporate taxes but to little or no avail. He seemed stagnated on fighter jets, jails and big oil. His individual performance was better than this Cerb member expected. Jack Layton had to fight a battle on two fronts. Attempt to attack and de-throne Harper while also engaging Ignatieff in an attempt to steal away some of those left of center votes. I found him to be his typical engaging self with little new to say. Gille Duceppe while a seperatist and therefore not someone that I can or would vote for is still a captivating man. His speaches are filled with passion and confidence...a shame he is a sovereigntist! When all is said and done I don't believe that any of the four included leaders made any head way in the polls. Harper seemed to tread water and Ignatieff didn't press hard enough on the issues that could have stuck. When you factor in that no one made any noticeable gaffes I think this debate changed little...if anything at all.

Layton was passionate and best got his message across in my view, Ignatieff comes second as he attacked Harper fairly well on his record on ethics and accountability and contempt of parliament and lack of respect for democracy but I feel he could have done better and Harper appeared programmed to repeat same sentences as how great the economy is. Harper was most prime ministerial but at one point I thought that he was going to get the knock out when both Layton and Duceppe contradict him that he sign a draft in 2004 to bring down the minority liberal govenment and become prime minister himself. Layton's attack on Ignatieff's lack of attendance in parliament could have been a knock out too for Ignatieff. Duceppe's comments on multi-culturalism was weird too!!!!. Likely Harper came out as winner because he kept his head cool during the debate and didn't get a knock out and likely will keep his party's lead over liberals but may be his 10% gap will narrow down.

I watched about 20 minutes in total (parts of the immigration question, parts of the law and order question and parts of the health care question) and had to turned it off several times because of how enraged i got. Question for "Canadians": How are these d-bags even allowed to be 'leaders'. I feel like I'm watching 4 clones of one person arguing with each other. Sigh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some positions warrant hazzard pay LOL

I find Gents seem to forget that part of the equation a lot when visiting us and worrying about things like getting caught. That we, quite literally, are sometimes putting our lives on the line... that we can never really know when we will be made victims and we do things in attempt of not only keep ourselves safe, but to also put our mind at ease that you won't be the last person we see. While it's far more likely you will be a fine upstanding gents than some dangerously mentally unstable person... I think as with STDs, we do have to recognize that that particular risk does exist. We have to recognize and then take steps to prevent the risk. For some, this involves getting a real name.

I have to come on here an tell you how valuable your donation can be. I'll approach it from the other side of the fence. My wife had a blood based cancer and went through an initial bone marrow transplant using her own stem cells. Although she initially had great results, the treatment didn't give her a lasting solution. As her condition became fairly grave, it was decided to try again using a donor stem cell. The odds in finding a donor through the registry can take a lot of time and are pretty slim, but fortunately one of her relatives was a match. Unfortunately, there were complications, and my wife is no longer with us. I came across many patients in my visits to the hospital who are hanging on waiting for the generosity of people like us. In this case it rather simple to put you name on the donor registry. The odds that they'll come looking for the donation are slim, but I'll guarantee that the sense of pride is great should you be chosen.

We may ask for your full name,number etc..but there are other ways around it..PROVIDE REFERENCES. We just want everyone to be safe..yourself included. I'm sure YOU wouldn't just call any ol number of a provider without checking her out first. I'm in NYC right now and have no problem getting the guys full name and or references..usually both. I was supposed to go to Long Island too but with all the bodies being found of presumed prostitutes i won't take a chance even if i did get all the necessary info. You have to understand that not everyone gets us...some still think of us as druggies or drunks working for pimps without a mind of our own. We need to feel safe and secure in our chosen career because that's exactly what it is our choice of career. Would you work for someone you didn't know at all? Emma

I am quite comfortable giving my real name. I like making friends with the ladies and have an on going relationship. One reason is I try to be selective in my choices, and I think I have pretty good judgement in the service providers that I decide to see. There has to be a degree of trust in her, and there's no incentive for her to give up your identity. It's just a matter of being up front and honest with people, treat them the way you expect them to treat you.

With respect, absolutely not. I do give my real first name, but there simply is too much at risk for me and my home life. I would hope my Cerb reputation here would help me to be identifiable, and I could provide some references if needed, but I'm not going to fully identify myself. I fully respect the ladies' right to make this a condition of a visit, and I would never argue over this requirement. There have been a (very) few occasions where this was listed as a requirement, but I explained why it was a problem for me and I have yet to have a lady not go ahead.

i wouldn't have a problem in giving out my real name

We may not be giving you our full name, but we are (often) inviting you to be alone with us in our personal homes. You are not at risk for violence like we are! Posted via Mobile Device

Most of the time it's stockings with lingerie ( I always wear lingere anyways) or an outfit they have seen in my pictures like the outift in my avatar above. No one has ever asked me to wear any costumes like nurse or french maid. Not really my things anyways and I don't have any of those. Most will ask for stockings, dress and heels. I have no problems with that.

Gladly, I will define. I advertise an experience not a service. When I receive emails asking How much for a bj? ,what will $100 get me, or the best one is the local ladies charge $140 and do it all (seriously I was not born yesterday) it really puts me off. You can't pick and choose what happens in a encounter, it is not a pizza where you pick your toppings. If you want just a BJ look for a lady who offers just that in her sessions, if it is too expensive, save up (I do not wish to be high volume, therefore my donations reflect that, do not insult me by telling me I should charge less so you can be my regular) Don't ask ladies to tour if you don't plan on supporting them, 90% of us have fully detailed websites and the information applies to all cities so why play stupid with the "O I did not know your donation applied to my city or I did not know you were visiting" if you've been looking at the site for months, reading the ads and have been directed to the website for details, it is pretty plain and simple what is offered,what the donation is and when I will be in your city. It really sucks that nice and amazing gentlemen have to suffer because of the stupidity of others. We already played the naivety card in another thread and in this day and age, if you can sign up on CERB you can read the newbies section. There really is no excuse.

The Ottawa police have the lowest rates in all of Canada for investigating sexual assault allegations. Last summer the Carleton University administration issued a statement on the rape of a student in 2007 saying that she should have taken precautions to ensure her own safety and therefore it was not the University's fault. Just a couple of months ago there was an incident in which the Ottawa Police called a 16-year-old girl's allegation of sexual assault a "hoax" Everyday in Ottawa, 50 women are turned away from women's shelters. Now, if the Slutwalk is not relevant in Ottawa, I don't know where it is relevant. As someone who works as a sexual assault support worker, I can assure you that this event is very relevant here. I can see how it's hard to make the connection here, but it's relevant nevertheless. Sky

Not relevant in Ottawa? I wish! Posted via Mobile Device

Yes, it's called cerb! Also for serious advertisers... Advertise on http://www.Escorts-Canada.com - it was the original escort advertising site in Canada back in 1997 and it's still around (with lots of traffic) today! You don't need to waste your time posting daily classified ads.