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Cristy, As a general rule we are all very well aware that when it comes to affairs of the penis most men tend to revert teenage boys when presented with a beautiful sensual woman and the very likely prospect that we'll get getting lucky. Its like our penis turns off something in our brains. I get so nervous when meeting with an SP that I actually have to consciously filter everything I say very carefully so that I don't end up blubbering on like a complete idiot. As a result of this conscious filter I have been told that I speak exactly like I write which is funny because in writing you almost always get a chance to proof read what you want to say before sending it out there. So I'm quite sure that in person I come off as a dork rather than a sauve and sexy gent. I've got to know one SP pretty well since starting and after many hours together I'm just getting to the point where the sickening nervousness doesn't get me and I'm just me. I'm pretty sure you can chalk those oddball comments up to nerves for the most part. However, the feet or voice comment I might make myself :)

Just wanted to let everyone know, that I should clarify what I meant by "dramatic". For those of us who knew her, in the light of what was happening to her at that time in her life such as her ongoing personal issues, which was soon followed completely unexpectedly by that overwhelming family tragedy, it is not surprising if she now remembers those events a bit more mystically than before. She was already having a tough time, and it only got worse. Trauma and tragedy amplifies memories.

Well lets face it we all can.:icon_biggrin: Lately I've heard a few silly comments, although I'm sure they weren't meant to rude, insulting or silly. But if I might say, gentlemen, when meeting an sp, for a good start to a session it might be a good idea to start off with a complimentary statement or just an I'm glad to see you, or it's nice to finally meet, ect, not......... 1.oh I see you fake your height! Well I am 5ft9, so no, but I do wear heels, like most ladies, and in them I appear very tall, over 6ft. So even though I know what he meant it wasn't the nicest way to put it. 2.Are those real? lol, well we all know by now! Do you really need to ask? Ladies nowadays add to their nails, hair, eyelashes and yes boobs, just appreciate them don't question them, not on an appointment at least. 3.Oh, your voice doesn't match your pictures, wha? So is that a good thing? This isn't appropriate either especially when you don't follow it up with a it's much nicer or it's sexier, some compliment.After all I have a nice voice! 4.How long have you been doing this? Wha-again, hmmm perhaps today I look a little more tired than usual? I wonder. But my response always will be -not as long as you!! Does it really matter how long either of us having been doing "this."After all you wanted to meet and we are both here so lets make it fun not awkward! 5.oh, your feet are soft! Ahhh, are'nt they supposed to be? 6.You seem very intelligent-seem?? Not sure how to respond to that one other than, well maybe thats because I am. These are the funniest ones of late , I had to mention them just to give some gentlemen an idea as to whats not a good idea to say-especially on a first meeting.

When it comes to making comments that you probably shouldn't most women have a strong intuitive sense about what type of man they are dealing with. (Maybe more so in this business.) Ladies can tell if your an insensitive guy who thinks he's hot shit or a genuinely good, loveable guy who has an innate ability to put his foot in his mouth. As such, usually the ladies reaction will correspond to the "type" of man who's made the comment. i.e. punch to the throat versus a playful tap and her saying, "you're terrible". Basically, be thoughtful but don't worry too much. If you're one of the "good guy's" the lady can tell and deal with you accordingly.

Makes one wonder about the mindset of some clientele. Are they really there for the experience of being with some marvelously gifted entrepreneurial person? One would hope that their brain was engaged when choosing a service provider for the date. Otherwise, they are really missing out, if they think all it is is the physical. I too have been speechless or a had a case of the starters on first introductions. But hopefully they have picked up that the reaction was due to the depth of presence and all that was conveyed. I admit once a sex worker gave me a quick visual flash while passing by. I forgot where I was driving my scooter for the moment and hit the restaurant wall. It did cause a bit of excitement with the maître d' and staff. I think I was more in shock then she was. The wall just came out of nowhere :) a humbling experience and the rest of the date went extremely well. PatrickGC

Hi all this is outdoorslover under my new name. This is a thread i wanted to post for a wile as it is important to me. I have always been someone who stands out form the crowd and will not let people change the person i am on the inside. but because of this i have had a lot of people judge my without knowing who i really am, i have always been a bit over wait but have always tried to help anyone i can. people always jump to what they want to think with out seeing who the person is or what the situation is. i have had this happen to me even just this month, and i have even seen it here on cerb with a couple of people not understanding the situation some sp are in. I know this is just from my pov but i know lots of people who are great and wonderful but have been judged ether by there looks, opinions, or even for no reason at all and it is a sad thing indeed. I know that even people reading this will judge me as i there a nice person or a sap but this is who i am and what i think. and i want every one who reads this to not let others change who you are inside and to always see the true person in others. Again i think that cerb is a great place and most of the people here know this but i just wanted to give everyone a little pick me up just incase they needed it. I will leave everyone with a couple of quotes as i love them. "Never judge a mans actions until you know his motives" -Paulo Coelho "It is easy to see the faults of others but difficult to see one's own. A man winnows his neighbor's faults like chaff but conceals his own as a cunning gambler conceal his die" -Buddha "You're going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter" -Nicholas Sparks Have a great and safe day everyone :)

Sometimes the hardest person to be is yourself because everyone has an opinion of who you are/should be. Not only that but most of us have grown up being told we have to do this or that in order to please others or be accepted or to get along. No wonder it takes us so long to start listening to ourselves. One of my favorite sayings is "I never said it would be easy but it will be worth it". When you start listening to your heart and believing in yourself and keeping those who try to tear you down at arms length whether they be family or friends, it's not easy but so worth it. When you find yourself judging, step back to get a different perspective, look at how that person might have gotten where they are, not easy but so worth it. Trying to focus on the positive and turning negative into positive, so not easy but so worth it. It's even more difficult in this industry because you are judged on so many things and some that don't really mean much. This is when it's really important to believe in yourself and know who you are and what you have to offer.

Even as a confident, experienced provider like myself, I too have gotten nervous to meet a client for the first time. I have said some pretty silly things...like the Gent just told me what he does for a living, then stupid me, I go ask a 2nd time! Gawd, did I just say that??? I laugh at myself! So I would not think that Dumb is the word, just nervous, that is all. Most of the people I encounter are smart, successful men who just tripped over their words in the glow of radiating beauty, hehehe...

There are many less fortunate people around the world who are hungry or sick or forced homeless due to war or natural disasters or even closer to home those charities providing shelters to battered women and those help runaway kids or put food on the tables for the poor and carry out many other good deeds. There are many charities which you can find by a simple Google search and choose the one(s) to your liking. I can guarantee that you will be rewarded big time. Remember if your finances allow hobbying it also should allow you to donate to good causes a bit. Think of the sick and hungry and rest assure that you can't wish it away, but only if you act as the song says tears are not enough anymore. Forgot about political corruptions overseas (in Canada at least it goes to the needy so no excuse for not giving to local charities) as the established charities (i.e World Vision) have ways to ensure it gets to the needy, especially their impressive child sponsorship programs which you receive letters and pictures of your (sponsored) children as they grow up. If you don't believe in heaven then I promise that you will be rewarded in this world as I was today. Yes today when I was filling my tax return I calculated an impressive sum back as governments (both Federal and provincial) return a big chunk of charity donations (I believe as much as 35% to 40% of my total donation. Now the dilemma is whether I donate what I will receive back to charities or I would instead spend it on myself....hmmmm Oh I think I will act a bit selfish and have a combined strip bar/escort using a good portion of my return one weekend lol :).

I strongly feel the same hun!! I give to charities, weekly, monthly and daily:) I do it because I have been blessed with the ability to be able! It doesn't matter how much or how often! But rest assure, I try to make a difference to at least one person daily! I foster a child, I also help my beloved family in Cuba, the dogs I work with at my local vet, food banks that I buy a bag of food for, IT ALL COUNTS, FOR SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, SOMEDAY! thanks for this great post!

I can't remember the last time this happened BUT I am excited to say I didn't receive any cancellations this week, that's right, not one lol so I am a happy camper! A nice way to start my weekend with a big smile :)

I have found that it can be hit and miss on BP, although I have had some great visits with girls from there, the percentage of 'misses' is much greater that those I have met on CERB. I have had mostly good meetings with individuals here and they come across as more 'professional' and not just looking for the quick buck. There are those who advertise in both places and therefore can be 'cross referenced' is an added plus (seems to make good sense to me). I guess for newbies it is a matter of finding CERB in the first place and then using it as an added tool in your quest to meet extraordinary ladies. HHE

So you are aware it has been bought by different folks, and that the old management is gone, but you choose to libel the new owners/management as being harassers and exploiters? I would suggest unless you have some proof of your accusations you keep your libelous musings to yourself.

Well, I'm a stripclub fan as well as a massage fan, and the same questions get asked about both activities by fans of SP's. SP fans can't understand why you would ever go to massage, if you can go to an escort. And massage and SP fans can't understand why you would go to a stripclub. The answer is that each kind of activity is what you can make out of it. There is more service available at each of these activities than you assume. Also at a stripclub, you can find many different girls all in one place, and you get a chance to try as many or as few of them as you like, but you have the choice to pick and choose. Me? My method is to see a girl for usually no more than two or three dances, and move onto the next worthy one. It satisfies my need for extreme variety.

Oy, some of those are cringe-worthy. Speaking as a man, I can regrettably confirm that yes, we say some dumb stuff. On behalf of my gender let me say we appreciate that you all put up with us! :) As nlwoodchurck says, you can probably attribute most of them to nervousness. And Miss Sophia is right that the more stunning the Lady the more stumbling the man will likely be. So I suppose in a way you could take odd lines as a good sign.;) Nevertheless, Cristy, those are definitely some good tips for a first greeting you've shared. A few thoughts: 1) I'd never have equated heels with "faking height". I don't know many guys that don't think a Lady in heels is sexy, plain and simple (well, maybe "plain" isn't the best word :bowdown:). 2) I've never understood the need to ask "are those real". I'm more with the line of thinking "if I can touch them, they're real!" :) 3) A follow-up compliment confirming that by "not expected" one means "better than expected" is definitely the way to go (as an aside, you do indeed have a very nice voice!). 4) Facepalm. Nuff said. 5) I have to admit I can understand giving a line like this. Eyes are generally beautiful, feet soft, and hair shiny, but sometimes they are especially so and such observations can be hard not to make, especially if it's favourite a feature. 6) The dreaded "seems like"! I confess I've been guilty of this one in the past, and always want to bite my tongue once the word escapes. As you observe it's not intended to be rude but does turn a compliment into a puzzle. So yes people, for the love of god and chocolate (whichever you worship) leave out the word "seems"!

I love the quotes you provided, thank you.But unfortunately people judge, some do it purposefully and others without intent. But people are people no matter where you find them so there is no safe place to get away from judgement, other than within your own frame of mind. By knowing yourself and as you say by not allowing anyone to change your opinion of yourself. On one of my web pages I included a saying I copied, "what matters most is how you see yourself". No better advice imo. It's taken me alot of years to learn this and follow it but finally I do, there is not a person on this planet that will convince me that I'm anything other than a nice, genuine, kind and caring person, no one! Lol, although some try. I like your post, great advice and thank you for it.:icon_biggrin:

"The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." Mark Twain Strip clubs are NOT going away, at least in the immediate future. The argument that money could be spent with escorts or massage works HERE on CERB, not there in the real world. I'm pulling this out of my butt, but I would say that probably 90% of the guys that go into a strip club stop there. That's the extent of their naughty fun. They sit in perverts row, have a few beers, MAYBE get a couple of CR dances and go home to their wives... and they do that BECAUSE they can't get past that mental block of physical "cheating." You can get away with a strip club in terms of GUILT... and as long as the outlet to see naked women exists, men will keep going. The internet is like playboy or porn on the big screen - it's exciting but it's not IN YOUR FACE exciting. Locations may come and go... but the death knell for the industry is far from being rung.

Hello:-) Its my last day next Monday then I am gone until May 10th. Ill be working 1-6 :-) Pls pm me or book online on the spa's website. See you Monday :-) and if not hope everyone has a terrific start of May. For those who haven't met me yet. Im tall and slim, brown eyes and highlighted hair. Give an amazing un-rushed sensual massage. Im down to earth and love meeting new people. I have many reviews - Look up Jordyn in 'Search' Feel free to msg me with any questions or if you'd like to book an appt. xoxo Jordyn

You don't want to work a winnipeg agency. They won't screen your clients and will take a very large percentage of your earnings. If you are looking for something safe and easy to get comfortable within this business I would recommend having a look at executive bath. They have a virtual tour that gives you an idea of the interior. I worked on and off there for several years. Management is strict but I do feel they want what is best for the girls, your uniform is a one piece bathing suit and you get to chill in jetted tubs, give massages and little happy endings. They aren't a FS establishment though some girls apparently break the rules. It's a good place to learn the clients, and get familiar with the industry without throwing yourself in head first. I found CERB had tons of info that helped me when I started as an Indie. I probably read the entire board 3 times at least.

Its been a slow day. My highlight is my 400th post. That and the sunny afternoon weather.

Speaking for Ottawa alone, the media now contacts POWER (Prostitutes of Ottawa-Gatineau Work, Educate, Resist), a local sex worker advocacy group made up of current and former sex workers when they are doing articles related to sex work. The fact that they are even thinking of sex workers themselves before doing their articles speaks volumes. Sex workers never used to be consulted before.

Not everyone knows about cerb. I can't tell you how many gents I introduce to our wonderful site and therefor I believe that not all ladies know about it either. This site grows daily and it grows because the users promote it! Diamonds can be found in any rough!

Lingerie at the door is definately not my thing. I prefer to have a "genuine" experience, which means having the SP dress according to the situation. For me, maintaining the illusion that I'm not in a paid scenario goes along way toward my enjoyment of the encounter. I wear suits everyday, and love when I can just kick back in some relaxing jeans and a tee and if given a choice I'd prefer to see an SP in the same way. I find something very sexy about seeing a lady in jeans a plain white top and bare feet. Casual, relaxed but smouldering hot.

Darlign gloryhole, I am truly sorry for your loss. I worked as a grief recovery facilitator for 13 years and I don't think you are ready for an intimate encounter at this point. I gently suggest you take a peek at The Grief Recovery Institute. They are leaders at helping people move thru loss and it's important that you address the situation head on. There are programs across the country and their handbook The Grief Recovery Handbook that you can pick up at any book store. Here is the website... http://www.grief.net/ I wish you all the best, please know there is a path forward... cat

Hey there sweetie. I love that you are still devoted to your wife and understand the pain you feel. I am not out where you are, but wanted to drop a line. Sometimes, it is easier to start new with someone different then someone similar then the love of your life. You have felt some deep losses and it is always hard to move on. Just take it one day at a time, grieve your losses, love the gift she gave you (your child) and understand it is ok to feel like why..... One day you will be ready. In the meantime, give yourself some time to heal and grow. It does not always make sense, but eventually you will meet someone you can share a new intimacy. Love and blessings. Meaghan xoxo

Go see Shannoninwpg. She does a lingam massage to die for.

Alright...you guys have convinced me. I've been dying to meet Anessa anyway so maybe I'll have to go to one of these clubs and do the full experience. Actually take the time to get to know some girls, have a few dances, etc. See what all the fuss is about. Can't knock it until I've tried it right?

Hello Gentlemen! My name is Talia, and I am a massage provider working out of an upscale spa in the west end. I love creating an intimate atmosphere and leaving you satisfied! My seductive touch, slippery bodyslides, and captivating personality will bring you to your knees ;) I'm still new to massage, but I used to be a camgirl, and haven't lost my exhibitionist streak! Height: 5'7" Weight: 110lbs Body type: Thin with curves Hair: Black and purple Eyes: Green My availability this weekend: TODAY: 9:00-4:00 Saturday: 9:00-4:00 Sunday: 10:00-4:00 My recommendations: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?ltr=T&t=127882 If you'd like to book an appointment or learn more about me, text me at 613-809-8984 (no calls), send me a private message, or book directly through the spa at 613-820-8887!

I would chalk it up to nerves, guilt or some other silliness.

This place used to have 'New Management' at least once a year. The big difference now is that there are new owners. One of these owners has posted on cerb looking for feedback to choose a new name and any ideas as to what people want to see. This would not have happened before.

Ohhh now I'm wondering about what stupid things I may have said... Next time I'm going to be too afraid to say anything. Just "thank you" when I leave...

Come see me this weekend in the east, for lot's of sensual erotic touch. I will tease you & tempt you just the way you need it ;). Im working today until 9 pm aswell as sunday. Don't miss your chance to book with me, petite blonde long hair, tanned skin...everything you need.

I was at The Playmate yesterday, and it was surprisingly crowded, you could barely find a seat. Don't know why though, it was unusual.

Ha Ha, I must point out that sometimes it's not nerves it's just plain old stupid. Idiots and aliens, they walk among us! It's just that the aliens try not to do or say things that shout,"I'm an alien". Idiots on the other hand, seem to like to draw attention to themselves whenever possible. There is a saying, "It is far better to say nothing and have people think that you might be stupid than to open your mouth and remove all doubt".

Welcome to CERB. Excellent points and a great start. You are so young and I really hope you have someone helping you with some of the things sp's already know due to experience. I won't elaborate here, but if you ever need to pm me and ask specific questions, please feel free to. There is a wealth of great ladies on this board that I know will also help you if you ask. Good luck. Great website, but yes, the pics won't download so you might want to fix that. xoxo Meaghan

Having one of the worst work days.....if not the worst in recent memory and home now...... and popped on Cerb, read a bit and all cheered up now :D Its amazing actually how someone else's good times / happy times can pick us all up !!!!!! Yay !!!

Dangerous Curves

I am aware of the change of management. I am not aware of the change!!!!.

There is a lot of media attention being paid to this topic right now, leading up to the Supreme Court hearing on June 14. Just the other night, on Tuesday, CBC Radio's Ideas did a program about Madelaine Blair, a prostitute and brothel owner in Western Canada at the turn of the 20th century. Drawing from Madelaine Blair's memoir, it was a very good overview, among other things, of the differences between the laws and attitudes about prostitution in Canada compared to the US. It also included an overview of the SCC hearing in June. As for the issue of coercion, that's a bit more complicated, I think. Speaking for myself, I was not coerced into adopting this profession in that no one pressured me into it or attempted to profit from what I do. It was my own decision to become a prostitute. Nevertheless, I made that choice because I was in fairly dire financial circumstances and had no other means to address them. Some might say that's coercion, though I don't. I think of myself as a survivor, above all; I'm someone who was and is determined to do the best I can whenever I can. I've never felt like a victim in this business. But I know women who have felt manipulated at times and who have managed to embrace this profession whole-heartedly and to do very well in it.

Self Serve maybe?

For some reason today was my first visit with Vivian. She is a sweetheart with great massage skills. The experience is different in that Vivian has a great imagination, keeping within typical spa limits. The location is quite far for an east-end guy although that's probably not a bad thing as I'd always be broke if I lived in Kanata :) The atmosphere is very nice with a well appointed massage room in the basement with a very nice in-room shower. Quite easy to tell that Vivian is an experienced massage therapist with just the right balance between muscle tension relief and erotic. She is very pretty with a petite toned body. I love the ceiling bar that she uses when using her feet to massage. She also gets up on the table which is also very enjoyable. I read somewhere that she's a bit shy.... this must have been a while ago as I found her quite comfortable, especially for a first visit. If you haven't had the pleasure of meeting Breath Taking Vivian, schedule a session, everything said about her above is accurate.

http://www.clubcmj.com http://www.clubmadellynjae.com Both can be used to view our HOT NEW website with an exclusive members only area, a private forum/discussion board, our new reservation & experience section and of course, in depth bios of all or SEXY hostesses. Don't forget to check out our awesome new booking system. Please contact us if you have any issues, concerns, feedback, tips etc Thanks everyone for your love and support :)

It says I am in day 999, I thought I should start to post !! I wonder if I can get 5 posts in 5 days. Last purchase was a spring jacket, got a thing for jackets.

Jen/Erica has always been a little dramatic, so it's hard to know what to think of this revelation. But everybody deserves their second chances.

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/clay-nikiforuk/sexism-at-us-border_b_3112638.html What do you do when you're detained by powerful officials, everything you say is presumed deceptive, arbitrary "evidence" is held against you, and you're treated like a moral deviant? And what if its 2013, you're a woman, and the "evidence" is that you possess condoms? It happened three times in two weeks -- being detained by U.S. border officials on my way to or through the States. First I was held by Vermont border guards for two hours in the middle of the night on my way to visit Nashville. They searched my bags at least five times. I could not help but notice how often my lingerie and "sexy underwear" were mentioned, how often the condoms they found were looked upon scathingly, and how most of the four male officers' questions pertained to both. I was baffled as to why this was any of their business and unsure of what their objective was, other than fondling lady's undergarments. In the end, having nothing to go on, they gave me a limited stay visa of two weeks and let me go -- at 3 a.m. in the middle of nowhere. I missed my bus and my plane, had to pay for a $90 taxi to the nearest airport and then book a new flight the next morning. The next time it happened was two weeks later in Montreal's airport. After scanning my passport, without being asked a single question, I was immediately led to a back waiting room. When I was summoned into an office, the officer cut to the chase: "How much is he paying you to go on this trip?" He was referring to the man I was travelling with. Confused, I just stared back at him for a few beats. "N-nothing?" The next question was whether this man was married or not. The answer, unfortunately for me, was yes. He asked whether I was planning on sharing a hotel bed with this man. I'm not one to sugar coat things and decided that now would not be a particularly good time to be found lying. Again, I answered yes. Righteous, the officer demanded what exactly I was doing in a bed with a married man. "That's actually none of your business." I had kicked the hornet's nest. Inflamed, he raised his voice at me that it was his business and that adultery was a crime in America -- a crime that he could deny me entry for. He made me tell him my partner's name and date of birth and threatened to detain him, too. I pointed out that we would be in Miami for a total of 40 minutes to catch our next flight to Aruba; hardly enough time to run to our gate, let alone commit adultery. The next thing I knew he was searching my bags, pulling out condoms and waving them in my face. "I could have you charged with being a working girl! The proof is right here!" All I could do is shake my head. This can't be real. "This is absurd," I murmured. But he was on a roll. "You want me to call his wife? I'll tell her!" I raised an eyebrow at him. "She knows." He stormed off again, leaving me shaking. When he finally emerged from an office, he held my passport and tickets in hand. He told me he was letting me go "this time" because I had told the truth. But that I was an educated woman and should change my life to reflect that. I blinked at him. "What?" He looked at me meaningfully and repeated himself. I nodded, eyes downcast as if I was taking his moralizing into serious consideration, and took my documents. I was afraid that he would change his mind otherwise. Later, after a very short Internet search, I found that adultery isn't illegal in Florida, and even if I had been paid for the trip, mixing sexual and non-sexual activities constitutes a relationship and therefore makes any money exchanged a very legal gift under the law. Travelling together to Aruba to get away from cold Montreal, I would think, signals a non-sexual activity. A few days in the sun later, it was time to face the same routine but in the Aruban airport. Again, I would be spending all of an hour in Miami's international airport and then carrying on to my home in Montreal. This time I had left the condoms behind. But it was too late -- there was a detailed profile of me, in which my nefarious condom-carrying behaviour was noted. Again, I was told to sit and wait for further questioning. I watched as my entire flight's passengers whizzed through customs in front of me. I was shaking. By the time someone got around to questioning me, I was told my flight was leaving. I was detained, yelled at, patted down, fingerprinted, interrogated, searched, moved from room to room and person to person without food, water or being told what was going on for what seemed like forever. Just as I thought they were tiring of me and going to refuse me entry but at least let me back into Aruba, a 'Bad Cop' type took me to a distant, isolated office and yelled at me that I was full of shit. He had found information online that in the last couple of years I had been modelling and acting. This, he concluded, was special code for sex work, and I was never going to enter the U.S.A. ever again. I tried not to laugh and cry at the same time. I told him I'm currently writing a book on the sociology of sexual assault. "Are you looking to be sexually assaulted?" I blinked at him. I couldn't breathe. "Was that meant to be funny?" "No, it wasn't." "Ah, no. I'm definitely not." "Well, it sure seems like you are." "...How so?" He wouldn't elaborate. I was with the U.S. officials for six hours. After two more hours put through the wringer with Aruban immigration, I was finally let go back into Aruba. I was told that if I even so much as approached the U.S. border again without a waiver I would be banned from the country for five years. My partner and I, both shaken, had to book a new flight to Canada that didn't pass through the U.S. (approximately $900) and a hotel for an extra two days until that flight. For me, carrying my own condoms (in purses, wallets, camera bags; everywhere) is a routine act towards safer sex. For someone else with the power to not only deny passage but judge, moralize and intimidate, it has become enough evidence to put a woman through hell. My story has brought a number of women out of the woodwork stating that they have had similar experiences. Whether border guards are copying police in New York and their condoms-as-evidence-of-prostitution model, or are simply so stuck in their gender stereotyping that a woman with condoms can't be a good person ("We've been told that there's nothing good about you," said one Aruban official), I'm also not sure. I do know I won't be travelling for some time, until my name is cleared. Or until the puritanical, power-tripping, slut-shaming witch hunt is over. I won't hold my breath for either.

Well, there's no harm in doing so. Did she have a thoroughly evil grin on her face at the time? Do you have irrefutable proof that she actually said her Hail Marys after she'd finished corrupting you? Has she corrupted you again since? Just askin' :)

Just use what you said in this question for your introduction to the lady that interest you. I edited it below ... I think its actually pretty polite and within reason. :D lets see what other has to say.

My deepest sympathies going out to. I cannot give you much advice about what you should do, but I can tell you this. Your situation you describe sound very familiar and the pain you go through I know it all to well. Although our situations may not be exactly the same I too understand your desire and need to be touched by the one you love and miss so much. This is something I feel too, but I've seen sp even ma, they give me back a little bit of light each time but it cannot replace them nor does it feel the same. Although for me it is enough to get through this hard times. I know everyone copes differently, I myself used to think the only way out was suicide. I do not know if this is something you deal with but I would like you to remember something you have a part of your wife left behind in your son, who needs a father. Give your son as much love as you can, he needs you! Growing up without a mother can be difficult, but to grow up without both parents would be far worse. Remember if you ever feel suicidal it is ok you're not alone in the world and I know how hard it can be to talk or tell someone about it but please trust me you will feel better. I myself still cannot talk openly to people I know and find it much easier to talk to strangers. I would be more than happy to talk if you ever need too. I may not be a therapist and give you much advice but I can listen and assure you no matter how hopeless and alone you may feel there is lots like us out there that feel the same. We just have to sake the chance and speak out, trust me its changed me a lot. I would also seek therapy they help a lot and they can guide you better and help you understand your feeling and emotion and eventually you will Learn how to cope easier. There is no shame in how you are feeling and what you think might help you. It my or may not feel the same only you can tell but remember she cannot replace your wife and I recommend only seeing her if you thing you can accept that. Just be prepared for either outcome it may feel the same it may not. My heart goes out to you what bit I have left.