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A question for the OP: could you perhaps go about this differently? The fact that you've been scammed on deposits multiple times indicates that something's up. Scammers have always been out there, but not everyone gets scammed. How do you go about choosing which SP to see? If you just go to LL (or wherever) when you're horny, and pick someone that the little head seems to like... well, getting some scammers is inevitable. The thing is, you have to do your research, and research takes time, and is best done when you're *not* looking for some action right now. As others have said here and elsewhere: look for a proper website. Do a reverse image search on the pics. Look for an established presence in the industry; whether that's an active and reasonably long-standing social media presence, or positive feedback from other clients. TBH the long-term presence alone is probably enough - it's all I really go on. Anyone pulling a scam simply won't last all that long before word gets around and they're forced to adopt yet another new identity, and so building up that long-term presence is almost impossible if you're just trying to make a quick buck from the next mark. I don't look at ads until I've *already* decided I might want to see someone and I'm at the point of looking at rates, screening requirements, contact methods, etc. That's what happens to work for me, and obviously YMMV... the point here is that a slower approach may serve you better than making a decision in a hurry. As regards looking for a regular: I get that this is the end goal for you, but again, perhaps... slow down? Providers get many, many messages from people claiming they'll be the best regular ever, and pretty much all of those are from people running a scam of their own (usually that they want a discount, I suspect). Claiming you want to be a regular before you've even met might be a red flag for some providers. Even on the first meeting, making it a regular thing probably isn't going to be on the agenda immediately. Think of it like a first date: do you actually *want* to see this provider regularly? No matter how well you might think you know someone from their online presence, the reality may be different. It happens, sometimes; I've met people in the past who I thought I'd get on well with, and... we just didn't really hit it off. That's not anybody's fault; it's just the way life goes, and you have to be prepared to simply accept that this time things didn't work out and it's time to pursue other opportunities. Finally, I'm afraid there's one thing I really must push back on: Hate to say it, but I think you're being unreasonable here. When you book a first appointment, you're booking that one appointment... and that's all. You met, and had fun, for the agreed length of time? You've got what you paid for. She owes you nothing more at this point. She said she's available for something regular? All that means is that she's happy for you to book again sometime; it is not a commitment to being available exactly when you demand it. The way to become a regular is simply to book again, and again, and again.... regularly. Telling her you intend to do that means very little; actually doing it is what counts. Please remember that the vast majority of people claiming they'll be a regular are, as I said, blowing smoke. No sane provider is going to abandon a tour for someone she's only met once, and the reason she didn't tell you about it before you met was that it's none of your business. If you *really* don't want to meet someone who doesn't tour, it's up to you to check providers' schedules and pick someone who doesn't - and if you take a long-term approach to your research then you'll probably just figure this out without explicitly looking for it, because most providers who are touring will talk about it. And if you're seeing someone regularly and you want to have a say in whether she tours or not.... well, to me that sounds less like being a regular and more like a SD/SB kind of relationship, which is an entirely different ballgame. If you want to keep her at home then you'd best be prepared to pay - in advance - for the privilege, and even then she may not agree. Hope all of that was of some use to you, or at least food for thought. Good luck!

Good news everyone...I'm still alive. I came really close to dying at the end of January because my body was shutting down. I was under good care and it wasn't at the hospital that I was taken care of. Not at 100% but working to get better then what I was before I got sick. Thanks to all for the PM with well wishes. So much happened while I was gone and not sure I'll be able to go through all the posts.

Just requesting recommendations of black escorts.Please post a link .Thanks

Biggy..... Rent Rogers Cogeco Gas ⛽️ Credit Cards Groceries...super $$$ order 😆 😲 😆 but only because I'm stocking up food wise for post op when I'm confined to my apartment. A Rambling RG

After a re-read of this thread I was reminded of an upcoming date (yes it'll be post op but one I'm very much looking forward too) that I'm having so a deposit (2nd one) has been sent to the lady. And I've paid deposits (well in full) since 2011 (unless a lady doesn't take deposits) and never lost a deposit. So I'm going to continue paying companions by etransfer, including for this date. A Rambling From Someone Who Doesn't Hate This Industry RG

Good show,NJ

Love that!

well... we do not have evidence that @Phaedrus is not a SW in this life 🤨 who knows ... may be he is a super elite super secret companion..... the kind they make movies on, with yachts & casinos may be he is the one they call when Shania Twain or Bryan Adams need love 😏 ... yeah ! I will roll with this narrative ! 😜 ~

Yeah, I didn't even see that... the whole "party friendly" thing can be a red flag! Kind of like "$150 an hour"! That's definitely a red flag for me. Was distracted by the photos. Speaking of which...you look very beautiful in your profile pic. I just requested to follow you on twitter. Would love to know more about you! Do you have a website? 🙂

I personally dislike all these acronyms

My pleasure to help. Helping you on this helps both sides of the entire industry too. Hopefully this info will help others avoid what you've endured. Oh I'm not challenging your decision. You do what's right for you. Unfortunately, what you say about the average is true and true for every group there is. And as others say, the more underground things are forced into the more sickos come along to exploit it. So this industry is one that suffers greatly as a result. On both sides. We all hear plenty of what SWs go through if they aren't aware of how to avoid trouble and only see good clients. If they are scamming you for deposits, most arent actually SPs. Catfish found out an onlyfans model was a man without conscience in his 30s or 40s who would use the names & pix of an actual OF model and simply scammed money from the guys with good hearts. This was his job he said and she wasnt the only SW he was exploiting and endangering to profit from. Here's a link to the episode: part 1: Part 2: WORST OF ALL: The show didnt even bother to blur out the SWs face! So guess what happened to her? She was exploited and screwed over even further. While she trusted her mom wouldnt go on OF and find her there, she sure as hell does watch OF ! Here's her reaction. Now she was ok in the end with her family knowing but she should not have that choice taken from her. A lot of us would be destroyed in their family life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gFkF4RCyms I can list a bunch of other examples. As someone here had said, no reputable SW would risk her rep to make a small sum. So I wouldn't use those people to describe most SWs anymore than I would describe someone pretending to be a client who beats, rapes and robs the worker. He's not a client, he never was. She was never a SW. But even with those posing removed, you still will find psycopaths and sociopaths more often than groups that are in the open... and even there... is the average collections agent a good person? Is the average hairdresser or stock broker? As communities like this exist, one can definitely say that the reputable SPs do conduct themselves well as does the average hobbyist. But lyla is not Leolist, LeoList is not instagram/twitter and those arent the street corner. As you can see here, many hobbyists and SPs have enjoyed many years together, some for decades, some more. As I said, many SPs will wave the deposit fee if she is not just visiting and if you have references. Given how many scams you have encountered, you would have also experienced meeting with several SWs and as long as you were respectful, you should get a ref from more than one. Keep in mind, even if she wasn't necessarily someone you would see again, the point of a reference is only assured safety... so its not the same as when hobbyists review/recommend us. So don't hesitate to ask. Deposits weren't a thing until covid. It was extremely rare and when it did happen it was for far off outcalls or full day bookings. This only started because of inconsiderate behavior of many clients and bad behavior of non clients. Once it was established, ya, the vultures came out. So the fact it was only became the norm because of necessity (you can watch its progression starting from 2019 to witness the standard and then starting looking again around june/july 2020 onward... See how often it happened, see those lamenting they may have to start asking deposits... what you went through with scams, they went through except a hotel room is way more than a deposit. So to blame isnt helpful. or defame or make stats on groups that have little to do with each other. Just finding solutions & communicating is. I wish you luck in your ventures. Please, even without sending deposits, do your due diligence because losing a deposit is not the only thing that can go wrong for a hobbyist.

i honestly am so sick and tired of the scams.. Yup. And it seems like it's more now than ever before and no signs of slowing down. The one thing I despise about this industry is looking for a "new" regular. I currently have a "regular" that i've been seeing for 3 years and I've had one before her that I was seeing for 10 years but she moved away just before Covid started. So just one left. I have totally written off "online deposits" as instant 100% scams just to protect myself from a nightmare situation. Even if they aren't, I'm not willing to roll the dice and find out anymore. I'm too old to be playing in the minefield. I'll keep my current regular until she quits the biz and then it's retirement time. No regrets. It's better to be safe than sorry. A clean & safe exit is a good exit. Just like that Kenny Rogers song said : "You gotta know when to hold 'em / know when to fold 'em / know when to walk away..." #NoRegrets 😎

Hi, I hear your frustration, I really do and I'm not about to preach or tell you off in anyway. Only empathy & some advice on how to verify & also how to be able to tell if she is consistently available. I've had clients I really care about fall victim. I dont know what city you are in but there are other ways to verify SWs, it gets more difficult with younger ones because they won't have the years of good reviews & recommendations. But that is certainly one way. In terms of whether they tour or are actually local, their site & their recos can also help u. You can contact those who have seen or still see them & ask if they really are in town as much as they say they are. Another hint is often if rates work on a declining scale. This will give you an idea that she prefers longer appointments over many 1hr ones, which regardless of how long each appointment your preference is, it will give you an insight into the fact that she prefers seeing less people more often as opposed to quantity or having no preference one way or the other. The trouble is a lot of the SPs who are established, available regularly and have regular agents, dont need to and therefore dont advertise as much. Myself I'm only on lyla & Twitter & although I've been available in Ottawa every week pretty much since I started, if you look into my post history, my 'schedules & announcements' wont reflect that. I'm often already somewhat prebooked & know enough of my regs will contact me regardless if I'm advertising (because they know I do this). I would hate for someone new to constantly be trying to contact me when I'm busy and get declined and give up or think I "never reply" so I just dont advertise unless I think I'll have booking time to spare. I'm also only in lyla & twitter. I'm giving myself as an example but there are many like me. I'm truly sorry for all you have endured. It's really rough esp for someone just starting out, on both sides of the industry. I know you are experienced. Many SWers will accept reference alone. Another key with deposits is if she has her own incall vs renting a space. The reason deposits have become such a widespread thing is because during covid, after months of no income, SWs would get booked, specifically rent their space out (many apts are either just Air BnBs or another SPs incall) they are on the hook either way, they pay the sum & then the gent cancels sitting fear of covid. This was a pandemic on it's own. It didnt happen to me as I have my own incall plus until i was vaccinated i only offered Covid-Smart apts. But it happened to many and so deposits became standard. Scammers saw this and took advantage. Many arent even in canada. (I had a hacker I know trace one cuz I was so mad they got a reg of mine) He blamed himself as he booked off leolist with someone without reviews. So anyway, the fact that SPs who are legit and consistent end up not advertising much, is adding to your troubles. If you're in Ottawa & tell me your preferences, I can vouch for many & know a diverse group. Outside ottawa I cant help. Oh! Many cities have had regular/established ladies create their own network. OIC in Ottawa, IndyCompanions in Mtl, I know TO & even Saskatoon have their own. While not all members are in for the long hall you can tell who is. I really hope this helps you and I wish you the best of luck. C36 has fed this getting worse. The states are worse too. The more laws u add, the further underground it drives it and along come the sociopaths & exploiters! Our laws were fine as they were prior to C36. Alas, all we can do is call our local MPs and organize. Anyhow, I hop my advice helps & I really hope you find what you are looking for. It saddens me because I know theres an SP out there who would love a new reg. Even those of us with regs, they do sometimes leave us before we leave the industry so keep your eyes peeled for ads that may not appear all the time yet say things like "As usual I'll be available from (insert days of the week). " and "my incall is..." if she has an apt itll always have the same characteristics. Also look for recos where the same gent posts again or says "I've been seeing her for the last ___ years" When you go to their sites you can often tell if they tour. Myself I dont tour but I do always set a day or two aside when I'm visiting a city. So I mention TO but it's also clear that I dont go often and dont stay long. If you see far away cities listed as an constant, she tours. Also beyond OIC and such their are twitter accounts that will offer a list of who is active & whether they are local or tour. Finally, network with some of the other hobbyists in your area. Send them a msg and ask who is legit & if interested in a particular SW but cant tell if shes consistently available, contact one of the reco posters & ask them. They'll definitely know if she is around a lot & easy to book with. Take care of yourself ! JessyCeleste .

I'm sorry this has happened, but I'm afraid you have to take some responsibility for this yourself. You've posted in another thread that it has happened to you multiple times. You know the old adage: Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. 😉 Long story short, stop sending money to people with nothing to lose by ripping you off. Established ladies with good reputations simply won't. (It would be stupid to risk their reputation and their investment for such a small amount of money.) Things to look for: Multiple recommendations from established members over time. (Not just first posts from a new accounts.) Social media presence that is established (active and not new) Professional Website Photos in ads that aren't stolen (learn to do an image search) Basically, any indication that it is someone who has put time, effort and money into establishing their business. If you can't find those things, then don't send a deposit. Plain and simple. Otherwise, a fool and his money....

Why it's good to do your research on a lady before sending one... I would never recommend just randomly sending money to someone you haven't at least made sure wasn't reputable and legit first We wouldn't have to ask for one if our time wasn't wasted so blame those guys

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Best advice Talk to providers from here that have recommendations. Talk to providers with a real online presence. When talking to providers, talk to them like they're human beings. Do your research first and follow their guidelines. If you feel uncomfortable about a situation, politely take yourself out of the situation. Yes there are a lot of scams out there in the industry, from both sides of the equation (client & provider).

I dont care if you have a different opinion.. i honestly am so sick and tired of the scams.. all you providers expect it like its just a simple request without ever acknowledging that clients are getting screwed over sending deposits.. i am just getting over trying to have faith in SP's .. trying to find a regular is a fucking nightmare fulm of scams and rude ass women

I request to meet first, always, for a coffee or tea in a public place. If the escort or domme refuses this, I assume they are a scam looking for an easy deposit. I have also been scammed in person by a horrible, monsterous woman in Toronto, but at least she was a real human who I actually got to meet lol I'm trans, but also gender critical, and a kinkster too. I get denied service for all kinds of morally questionable reasons, but I get that it's all about preferance and comfort(the feeling is mutual). I understand that sex work is hard work, and also a form of exploitation(most work is), but I have never been so denied, decieved and betrayed as I have been among sex workers. It's extremely disappointing.