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Showing content with the highest reputation on 09/26/13 in all areas
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7 pointsI need to give my brain a good scrubbing. I saw the post title and immediately thought of labia :biggrin:
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6 pointsI don't mean to be rude but what the %^*#^ is with all the bbfs requests? I took some time off and since I've come back, so many men have requested bbfs "even if I pay you more." NO... No, no and NO!! I will not offer bbfs (although I do bbbj) but that's a whole different story. Did I miss a memo somewhere? What's going on? I've been around for a while and I have NEVER had this many requests. People, please play safe, get checked regularly and please don't participate in bbfs! It's not just about pregnancy or bacterial infections! There are serious viruses out there! I'm just shocked by the number of requests, as if it's normal. Please, don't let this be the norm...
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6 pointsOf course finding a serial killer should be investigated but to say that it is a waste of taxpayers money to investigate a police officer who has broken the law and the trust of the public is ridiculous. From the article: "Beebakhee is facing six counts under the Police Services Act, including insubordination, corrupt practice and deceit."
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2 pointsHi Gents, Don't let the ink deceive you, I'm as sweet as they come and even more playful! Spending the afternoon at Paradise and I would love some attention ;) Come in for a relaxing full body massage and let me help rub those worries away. you can find me at 1902 Robertson Rd. until 7:30 tonight. For bookings call 613-820-8887
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2 pointsThanks to everyone who commented in my last thread about what to do for a client retirement. I did a bit of a whirlwind tour and saw some of my favorites from the past and some new and some who I hadn't seen enough. I've sowed my wild oats and now it is time to take care of me. I have now come to the conclusion that it is time to do something else with my free time. I had lots of fun. Thanks to all the SPs who were there for me these last three years. Although I may pop in from time to time to say hi, it will be as an observer, not a participant. Bye and thanks.
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2 pointsLuscious Tianna, with thanks. We've been having a very hot pm exchange. :)
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2 pointsCleavage is like the sun. You can glance at it for a second, but if you wear sunglasses, you can look much longer. :icon_cool:
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2 pointsIt does seem bbfs is offered more and more these days or at least that's what we've been led to believe. I do think where there's smoke there tends to be fire. I recall not that long ago that a bbbj was unheard of, at least publicly and now it seems to be the norm vs the exception and often a deal breaker. The advent of come and go girls using a cell phone and bathroom selfie's could be the driver but I'm not convinced that is the only driver. In a small market like Winnipeg I think competition is also a factor, traveling girls have obviously found a lucrative market here and one just needs to look at the number of local vs traveler ads on ec ads to verify this and must be taking a lot $$$ out of the local market. Increased competition causes lots of reactions, competitive pricing can be one, using rumours of certain sp's providing bbfs to discredit them is another, we've seen outing's of sp's to family, friends and landlords and we do have a rep for cancelling and no shows which can in some cases be caused by friends of or jealous sp's, come and go girls who don't care about long term business or other issues. It could simply be a new generation of players who are fine with it and the risks involved. Due diligence by both the provider and the customer has never been more important than it is these days. And that has taken some of the fun out of the game at least for me. Peace MG
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1 pointOnce in a while you come to realize that so many of our members really don't "get" the whole hobby experience, or rather, they understand that there are rules but believe they are somehow exempt. So let's help them. Let's give some handy tips to make this a more wonderful experience for all. This is a pleasant place so let's keep it constructive... and be aware that the rules shouldn't just be for clients, you can also add some helpful tips that may help a new provider too! Here goes: 1. Appointment time is at 2:00 pm, what time do I arrive? Ummmmm. Hmmmmm. What part of 2:00 pm is ambiguous? A 2 o'clock appointment means you are at her door at 2. Not 1:55, not 2:10. It's seems petty but when you screw up her schedule, you may be screwing up MY schedule. I may be the appointment at 3. I have things to do... and my schedule may not be as loosey goosey as yours. I may be using a very small window of time or I may have "commitments" that see me arriving like clockwork elsewhere. Regardless, when the little hand is at 2 and the big hand is at 12, be where you are supposed to be. 2. "I am awesomely wicked good in bed, and I often masturbate to pictures of myself nude, because I am that good looking. Can we negotiate a better rate?" In a word, No. Would you go to a restaurant and say, "I am a really good eater, can I get a better price on that steak?" Would you go to a lawyer and say, "I am an awesome criminal, can you represent me for free?" Would you go to the dentist and say, "My teeth are so bad that you should fix them all for $50!" A service provider gets paid at a set rate because she is a professional. She is good... no, not just good... wickedly awesome good, at what she does. Your part is the compensation, her part is the wicked awesome part. Pay the pretty lady and be happy. 3. Cleanliness is next to godliness. Ever step into an elevator and stand next to someone who smells like they have never met a bar of soap they liked? Ever met someone that looked like they were an extra in the Walking Dead? Have you ever gone into a bathroom after someone and wondered if they ate something dead? Step one. Go to the potty. Do your business. Wipe. Wipe again. Wipe again. and then, wipe again. Do the optical test. Last wipe. Is there any residue? If yes, start over. If no, then proceed to step two. Step Two. Shower. Clean EVERYWHERE. Rinse. Repeat. Did you pay attention to anywhere in particular??? Hmmm??? Go back to those places. Make em sparkle. (at this point I do suggest that artificial glitter is NOT necessary.) Get out of the shower. Towel dry (for pete's sake use a clean towel!)... apply a generous amount of deodorant/anti-perspirant. Brush your teeth. (if additional grooming is required, please do that too.) Step three. Clothing. Go to the place where you keep your clean clothes. No. Not the place where you put the stuff that you THINK you can wear again. The CLEAN clothes. You know that stuff that you just took from the dryer and folded nicely?? That's the stuff. Wear that shit. Uh oh... what if I have to do step one again?? Then repeat ALL the steps. Cuz skidmarks are not sexy. Febreeze showers are not acceptable. 4. I have to cancel, what do I do? Give your head a smack. With a hammer. Stop. Now take a pointy thing and stick it with great force into your upper thigh, avoiding the artery. Now, go to your car. Start it. Open the door, put your foot beneath a tire and have someone put that car in reverse. Cancellations? NOT COOL. We all know that shit happens. A death in the family. A sick kid. Decapitation with farm machinery. Thermonuclear war. Explosion of your planet from a death star ray. That shit is acceptable.... but you still owe the pretty lady an explanation AND a cancellation fee. When you cancel, providers don't eat. When providers don't eat they get distended bellies and look like kids from the CARE commercials. When you cancel, providers give not only you, but also your city, a bad reputation. This makes you masturbate more. Because you will never get laid again. Ever. You will over develop muscles in only one arm. Your clothes will fit poorly. People will figure it out and suspect you are the notorious masturbating king of cancellations. They will hunt you down and kill your family. Let's keep little Bobby and Joanie safe. If you make an appointment, keep that appointment. Your family will love you for it. 5. "I'm a little short on cash. Do you think she will notice if the envelope is a bit short?" In a word, yes. She will also point out that your penis is a bit short.... and that your skill level is a bit short... and that you cry like a bitch when you have your pathetic little man-gasm. Do you want that??? Do YOU WANT THAT, bitch??? Wow. That was a bit over-emphatic. Gonna step away from the computer and take a valium. BACK!!!! Where were we... yes. Shorting your provider. Not COOL. Remember, providers have special powers. They communicate telepathically. As soon as you walk out that door, she will know and so will all of her allies in the super friends. They will combine their superpowers and make sure that you never get wood again.... and if you do, it will be at inappropriate times... like at funerals or family gatherings or when talking to your grandfather or something like that. Seriously?? Give your head a shake. If you are short then GET the money and make sure you have it set aside BEFORE you book. You will have a wickedly awesome good time... just pay the pretty lady what you agreed to and enjoy! 6. Can I pay her in drugs? Hmmmm. Does your banker take drugs in lieu of money? Have you offered Rogers drugs in return for their cable/home phone/cell phone/internet bundle? When you get groceries at Loblaws, do they have a special drawer that says "financial equivalent in drugs?" You know the answer. "No, you addled-pated simpleton." Remember the distended belly part from above? Providers take cash because cash buys groceries, pays bills and looks pretty. Carrying cash will not get you arrested. Using cash is the engine that runs our capitalist society. "All you need is cash, cash is all you need." The Beatles sang that, I think. Your turn....
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1 pointI'm actually talking about food here...pervs!:biggrin: My favs are: 1. Light Tuna + chopped celery + chives + miracle whip on thick slice soft whole wheat/grain. Sliced diagonally in 4s. Kosher pickle on the side. Fresh brewed Coffee. Great for road trips. 2. Smoked meat piled high + Sauerkraut (drained) + Mayo + Dijon mustard on light rye. Sliced in half. Sliced Kosher pickle on the side. Light cold beer. 3. Rotisserie Roast beef med rare (rump) sliced thin & piled high but evenly. Fresh dark rye or better yet, pumpernickel. A little hot horseradish. Mayo. Clover sprouts. Sliced in 3rds. Small bowl of cold gazpacho. Chilled dry white wine. Yours?
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1 pointThis morning while I drink my coffee and read the boards here, I?m struck by how many complaints we have about the guys who take advantage of some aspect of our services and then treat us badly. There are active discussions about men who: Try to negotiate or bargain clearly-stated non-negotiable fees Try to pay less than the agreed fee after they arrive Try to get services that were not agreed on before the date Complain about our screening questions Don?t bother to take a shower, brush their teeth or trim their nails before seeing us Assume that we're likely to rob them Threaten to write bad reviews and/or aren?t believed when they write good ones Insult us, our need for safety and even our looks when we don?t give in to what they demand No one is forced to read our ads and websites, look at our photos, contact us, discuss our services with us, or meet with us. It?s all voluntary and initiated by the client. The client has needs, feelings, preferences and curiosity, but why do so many refuse to take responsibility for themselves? What they express as anger, self-righteous indignation and personal entitlement is really projected self-hatred. I want to sit these men down and say: If you don?t want to see a paid companion, don?t do it. If you decide to seek out a companion, that's your decision. What you want is not what everyone else may want. That?s usually a wonderful thing. Recognize that we?re not like cheap candy that you can buy daily. We?re more like fine dining to be enjoyed occasionally. Plan accordingly. If someone?s prices are too high for you, either wait until you can afford her, or find someone else. Meanwhile, don't blame her for your lack of funds. Recognize that she charges what the market will bear. That means that there are plenty of others who can afford to see her. Always be polite and considerate. No matter what. Even if you feel confused, disappointed or insulted, be polite. Remember that companions are human beings, just like you. We have needs, desires, dreams and things we?re worried about or afraid of, just as you do. We will protect both your health and our own. Fair is fair. If you're worried about your safety, know that she's concerned about her safety, too. No matter who or how important you are or think you are, the one who is taking the most risks is always the companion. Always. Relax.
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1 pointThe Reuben sandwiches from Golden Rooster (Kingston) and Nate's Deli (Ottawa) are amazing.
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1 pointWhen things are looking up and I'm having a good day one asshole ruins it and you feel like shit afterwards.
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1 pointThursday Lilly 9-7:30 aka "Lillickens" Tianna 9-4 aka "Luscious.Tianna" Pandora 9-4 aka "Pandora" Mandy 2-11 aka "Candy Mandy" Hannah 3:30-11 aka "Hannahxo" Jamie 3:30-11 aka "Jamie-xo" Melody 7-11 aka "Melody" Cherry 2-11 Welcome Back aka "Cherry Blossom" Hello Cerbies....We are welcoming all feedback from our clients...... we appreciate any and all feedback to better improve our environment and services to our clients! Don't be shy to send us a PM :smile: And thanks to anyone that has already taken the time to provide us feedback.Thanks, Angie Our latest hire ...Riley 23 years old,5'1 feet tall,110 pounds,hazel eyes,32B. This cutie used to work for us a couple of years back! This blonde bombshell vogue model look alike will astonish you indefinitely with her striking beauty and top rate out of the ordinary service. No session with her is ever the same. She will tailor her craft to your deepest most unique desires. She will run her fingers delicately over your body and your heart will just melt. Her sensuality and sincere persona is not to be missed! Pics of Riley http://www.angelstouchmassage.ca/site/the-angels/rileys-profile/ New Sexy Pics http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/member.php?u=22187 Come for a 4 hand massage in our getaway room....an experience you will never forget Ottawa's Best Room! Regular Room spacious and in room shower Single Massage: 30 minutes $55. 45 minutes on special for $65. 60 minutes $80. 90 minutes $120. Session time @ Discretion of MA Duo Massage: 30 minute on special for $80. 45 minute on special for $100. 60 minute on special for $130. Getaway Room Fee: Room Features a hot tub,6 ft custom shower and fireplace for your enjoyment Single Massage: 30 minutes $70. 45 minutes $85. 60 minutes $100. 90 minutes $150. Session time @ Discretion of MA Duo Massage/Couples Massage: 2 Attendant 30 minute $100. 45 minute $120. 60 minute $150. Couples Massage: 1 Attendant 30 minute $70. 45 minute $85. 60 minute $100. HST included in all door fee prices Longer Session times available and at the Discretion of MA Mandy's Recommendations http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=120757 Tianna's Recommendations http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=136941 Jamie's Discussions http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=104412 & http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?ltr=J&t=114727 Melody's Recommendations http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?ltr=M&t=98753 Hannah's Recommendations http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthr...ltr=H&t=125137 ***NOW HIRING****ATTRACTIVE,RELIABLE MA'S WHO ARE HARD WORKING TO WORK IN OUR BUSY SPA****** Cherry
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1 pointBeing originally from Montreal, I too enjoy the classic smoked meat on rye! :) But sans sauerkraut and I prefer the yellow French's mustard for this application. I also really enjoy Italian deli sandwiches. Nicastros on Merivale is my favourite and have been going there for years. Crusty Italian rosemary & roasted garlic ciabatta, spicy capicola, mozza, spicy pickled eggplant, and piled high with fresh crunchy veggies. But in the end, I cannot escape my simplistic nature when it comes to food, and to this day, the way I have fond feelings for the food I ate regularly as a child. I think my all time favourite is a toasted tomato sandwich from the garden or farmers market, on whole grain bread with Hellman's mayo and fresh cracked sea salt & pepper. So yummy. Always paired with a tall glass of ice cold milk! :) It does a body good!
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1 pointCome get a relaxing massage by a hot little vixen xoxoxoxoxoxo About me- Sexy petite 21 year old with long red hair, sparkling green eyes! Out going, bubbly and ready to rock your world!! Providing- Flirty and dirty relaxation massage Soapy sexy showers Reverse massages Body slides- Duo massages(4 hands, 2girls) Hotub session9s & you'll leave happy. Schedule TODAY: 4-11 Rates- Single Massage 30mins: $50 45mins: $60 60mins: $80 Hot Tub Sessions 30mins: $70 45mins: $85 60mins: $100 Duo Massage rates also available upon request Location- West-end, Clean & cozy Contact-To book an appointment please send me a PM
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1 pointNo smokescreen, she will actually take you for a walk into the woods, good times really..
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1 pointExplicit Pleasure & Wild Experiences With A Beautiful, Naughty & Erotic Angel! *EXTENDED HOURS!, SPECIAL RATES & MORE* Gentleman, Are you looking for a sensual yet seductive experience with an MA Goddess ? I am beautiful not only on the outside but the inside too! Beauty & Brains! what a bonus . I love to please and tease and value the favour of being equally pleasured. Sounds like fun doesnt it ? You will love to come feel my touchably silky, smooth skin, round firm behind, firm naturally 36C big luscious boobies and feel the erotic pleasure of my services. I allow you to explore it all with me, lets go on some new adventures that will surely take your mind and body on a trip. My Appearance: 23 year old, long haired brunette, dazzling sexy hazel eyes, lightly tanned, silky smooth skin, I stand at 5'3, 125lbs with curves in all of the right places, 36C perfect tittys!, gorgeous face features and i am Italian & French of nationality. My Personality: very outgoing, playful, sensual, erotic, seductive, naughty, bubbly, sweet, kinky, classy and open minded are a few words to describe me. My Services: -erotic nude massage -great conversation & atmosphere -An ending that is sure to leave you more than happy! -reverse massage -duo massage (2 girls, 4 hands) -soapy showers for 2 -topless massage -multiple experiences -pearl necklace/russian release -cob -dirty talk -foot fetish/worship -strip tease/lap dance/pole tease (if requested) -toy play for you & I both (if requested) -fetish's & role play (if requested) -outfits, heels, stockings, exotic wear/lingerie (if requested) & much much more, feel free to ask me My New V.I.P. Package: Only for the discerning, classy and upscale gentleman at my discretion. My package includes many many different services for one price! All services depend on comfortability together and are YMMV! I recommend a 45-60 or even 90mins session to fully enjoy each others company, relaxation and un-rushed play time. For more information regarding the services please text or pm me. Fees: (Door Fees Only) 30mins: $50 45mins: $60 60mins: $80 PLUS tipping in the room (Please PM me) (Door fee rates for duo massage also available, please PM me) Location: (Thursday) Merivale & Hunt Club. (Incalls Only). Clean, discreet, upscale & professional. ATM on-site, Free parking, fresh towels, a/c & heated, showers in each room & hygienic products for you & I both. Schedule for this week: (Thurs. Sept. 26th-Fri. Sept. 27th): (I do not work Saturday or Sundays unless posted) Thurs: 10am-7pm (Angels) Fri: 10am-5pm (Angels) EMAIL. PM ME. CALL. TEXT for more information or to book your sexy session with me! 613-600-3943 (no blocked calls pls) [email protected] Personal Website: taylordevine.escort-site.com Angels Touch: 613-274-7074 Paradise Spa: 613-820-8887 CRAVE TAYLOR BOYS! XOXO MUAHS! CIAO FOR NOW
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1 pointReady to Satisfy that Sweet Tooth of Yours?! Try some Strawberry Shortcake! Natural Red Head, 5"4/5"5, Deep Blue Eyes, Skin of White Silk, 34DD, Hour Glass Figure, which means Amaaazing curves ;-) Let me show you my sweet side that has a kick to it ;-) Available today at 3049 Carling Ave...across from the coliseum theater 3-10pm Callbto Book Now! 613-204-2584
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1 pointShe is legit and a very nice lady, I have seen her a few times..
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1 pointHigh Class Nice Ass Hot Style Sexy Smile Luscious Thighs Bedroom Eyes Tempting Lips Killer Kiss Oh Baby, Can you Handle This My name is Tiffany. I am 5'11" tall, Athletic Build with blond hair, hazel bedroom eyes, and a smile that will drive you crazy!! I believe in the simple pleasures of life, and love sensual experiences!! From the moment I walk into a room with you, you will feel the connection between us. From the first soft flirty move I make to a finish that will leave you weak in the knees, you will be thanking yourself for spending time with me! You will always leave my room felling relaxed and with a smile on your face!! Come and Experience the Sensational and Erotic twist of a NURU Massage Contact Me Text me at 613-277-4328, Call the Spa at613-274-7073 or PM Me To Ensure My Availability! Schedule Thursday September 26th: 10:00am - 4:00pm Friday September 27th: 10:00am - 4:00pm Sunday September 29th: 10:00am - 9:00pm Exclusively at Angel's Touch Massage 65 Bentley Ave. 613-274-7073 See More of My Pics Here http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/album.php?u=76755 What others have to say about time spent with me http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=111731 Sexy isn't always about boobs or butts, It's the way you Walk, The way you Talk, and The way you Think.
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1 pointDecided to swing by the Mate last night as I was bored and I was not disappointed. There were a lot of hotties in house and they were all pretty frisky. Of note on stage were Summer (tall blonde) Mackenzie, Bambi etc I had a very nice convo and then sensual dance from Lela a brunette with awesome lingerie and a very sexy ass. Then I had some great chat with Ashley a girl from NS. She's not a spinner but the way I like em with meat on her bones. Nice big natural rack that was lots of fun to play with once we got in the CR. We seemed to click and that resulted in some great mileage. YMMV as always. She likes guys who compliment her, stroke her gently and treat her with respect. Spent the rest of the night cuddling with her and her friend...Marita I think her name was...another NS girl, quite short, black hair and big eyes with an ass you could bounce a quarter off. Yeah I got her to stand up and actually did bounce a Loonie off it....we were doing shooters, what can I say? There were a lot good lookers in house last night and I was kinda impressed as I hadn't been in there in a long time.
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1 pointHappy Birthday !!!!! May you day be filled with nothing but the best and greatest joy. :) TC
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1 pointA girl by the name of Alexis on BP stole my ad also using stolen pics ... She literally copied and pasted it exactly what I wrote ...Not impressed at all, what can I do do she can change it ?
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1 pointBeef stew and dumplings. I'm sure I'll need to make more dumplings tomorrow for the leftovers and I always make enough stew for the next day or to freeze.
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1 pointPut your post here. http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=122 You'll get better exposure. Good luck.
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1 pointAll the best for a speedy recovery! You will be missed, but keep in mind how exciting your return will be!! ;) Kisses XoX
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1 pointMy sympathies, I am going through a very similar problem and hope to get some answers when I see see the neurologist tomorrow. I don't think I'll be giving up this bit of recreation though.
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1 pointHappy Birthday, Isabella! I hope it's all you wished for ... and then some! :)
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1 pointThanks for the info you 2, and the OJ all over myself Kathryn. Effin (excuse me) Rogers is going to be in my neighbourhood for the next 2 days AND in and out of my house!! How very inconvenient to me...and I had the embarrassment of having to cancel a playdate. Mother Nature is none too pleased the the moment. There will be no labia flapping in my house today or tomorrow. :icon_cry: Looking around for that confounded Hitachi! Additional Comments: And of course, I couldn't resist changing my Avatar! :icon_wink:
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1 pointThe Ottawa Sun printed sensationalism and passed it off as news? Shocking (insert sarcasm here).
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1 pointJust found out about an hour ago that an old colleague and a very dear man was murdered yesterday in Toronto. One of the gentlest gentlemen, soft spoken, polite, calm and a very sweet disposition - I haven't seen him in a few years but this was like a gut punch - life is so precious and it can be taken away so easily....
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1 pointFuck Your Morals. ;) Just Kidding..... Ish. I do chemistry not Math. I have had some great conversations and connections with people through texting or Private messages and get this preconceived idea of who they are in my mind- I pick an age, and hair colour and all sorts of crap- then I actually meet them- and im shocked- that theyre either waaay younger or waaaaay older. At first I feel jipped lol. and a sudden loss of attraction to the mystery man I had conversed with. But then....I realize they are still who they were through the screen- Their sexy shone through then- so why let our brains or eyes rob ourselves from experiencing all the sexy people can surprisingly offer us? Morals/Ethics aren't set in stone. What you feel is 'right' one day may be trivial or non existent the next. Dont let your own brain hinder you from enjoying life..... Whether you're 18 or 81 ;) Giddy Up. *Remember To Live*
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1 pointAll of the Mp/Mas' listed are wonderful, but if I was visiting, and had only one experience available, then the Jessica experience is not to be missed.... Her hours are curtailed for school, but good luck
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1 point+ a million points for usage of the word "gaul" in a post. lol nicely done! I agree that they should do a study - I grew up in the country, and when I moved to the city I was surprised at how rude and cold people could be... people out in the sticks aren't generally like that, in my experience.
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1 point8. Safety first If you are a guy you KNOW that wearing a condom is akin to drinking beer with a straw. It's not as good as without but in the end, it's not that bad. Wearing a condom let's you go home to your significant other and not wear one. It's as simple as that. It also lets your wickedly awesome provider also go home to HER significant other (if applicable) and not have to demand that they wear one. It creates that safe barrier between both of you and the great unknown. The likelihood is that you are both very clean and very safe... but why take the risk??? If I can only make one super serious point in this entire thread, it's this. STDs are ugly. HIV is heinous. AIDS is deadly. Nuff said on dat. 9. Fragrance I know it's aesthetics, but we all like to smell good. Many of us have a particular scent that just works with our body chemistry. Not every commercially available scent is good. Ice Blue Aqua Velva is a manly scent that many of your grandfathers wore to cover the fact that their homes had no running water and that they could only bathe monthly. Aqua Velva, Brut and Hai Karate should not be worn by any man with a birth date after 1919. Bay Rum is used by pirates to kill scurvy and to keep other lonely, lusty pirates away. Anything that you purchased prior to the millennium should probably be used as drain cleaner. Febreeze is not an acceptable cologne. Scent should be used in a delicate fashion. You should be able to smell it only at very close range. Ohhhh... and your twig and berries do not require the assistance of any eau de cologne. No. They. Don't. Spray cologne on your arm. Now lick your arm. Lick it again. And again. And again. And again. Now give that arm a suck... oh yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about.... lick that arm until it gives you the goods... STOP. What does your mouth taste like? That's why you don't spray stuff on your tackle and bait. Ohhhhh... and here's a tip for both ladies and gents: If you are somebody that has sensitivities to fragrance PLEASE let it be known at time of booking. We all want to have a sexy time. Runny eyes, snotty noses and swollen tongues ... not so sexy. 10. First contact. Ohhhh the jitters. You have seen her. She is beautiful. She has two of those, and one of those and a great one of those... she has a beautiful mind, she expresses herself so well.... she's funny!!! She's profound. She's smart. She's perfect!!!!!!! I gotta write her. I have to PM her and ask if we can get together. I went to her website and checked the rates and the menu (like all SMART hobby guys do ;) ) ... and now I am ready to write her. I know what I want... I have the money put aside (thanks for reminding me of that Old Dog!!)... I am .... FUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKK.... what do I write??? Dear Alotta Fagina ... I have a 10 inch meat girder pulsing with lusty intent <THWACK> ... you're right maybe I was exaggerating, thanks for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 7 inch purple python of love poised and waiting for your girl cave <THWACK> ... okay... maybe that sounded a little stalker like, but I do get kudos for being more accurate. Thanks again for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 5.5 inch throbbing man stick just waiting for you to... <THWACK> ... okay... WTF??? Why do you keep hitting me???? Try "Hi Alotta, I saw your website and would be very interested in meeting you next Tuesday afternoon. Please let me know if that works with your schedule! Thanks, Happy Hobbyist." Simplicity works. You aren't writing a Penthouse letter... you are booking with a professional provider. She knows you are interested. She will see your penis. (There I said the penis word. Whooops said it again.) No need to go into goofy graphic detail... plus when you write that stuff, you get that creepy smile and that's frickin' scary ... stop it now. 11. Bacon Sandwiches. Providers - you know it. Bacon sandwiches save lives. It's not necessarily a deal breaker but I think it definitely would be a pot sweetener if you had bacon sandwiches as a mandatory refreshment at your incall. I like mine toasted with lettuce, tomato, mayo and a little salt and pepper. Cut into triangles, but you don't have to cut off the crusts. MegForFun cuts off the crusts for me but that is because she loves me. Bacon sandwiches will improve your business and will put you that much further ahead than providers who only provide ham sandwiches or cheese sandwiches and much further ahead than providers who don't make any sandwiches. Bacon sandwiches just make good business sense. wait there's more.... later ;)
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1 pointThought I would bring this back to cerb where you can find a zillion great bum shots like this one.... http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/album.php?albumid=5997&pictureid=38236
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