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Gah! As someone with a background in IT and who currently owns her own computer shop, please don't go freaking out. This has been around for years and is, in fact, scareware. It plays on the immediate human response to try and get money. IF people read it, they will realize that if you indeed have committed said nefarious acts, the RCMP isn't going to let you off with paying $200 or $300 via Ukash. They are going to come and drag you, kicking and screaming, to jail. Read EVERYTHING!!!! Secondly, virus protection programs are bullshit. None of them are going to protect you 100%. Not one. No matter how much you pay or don't pay, you will not be protected 100%. Virus makers get around these programs. In addition, when you install something it is going to tell you you have some insane number of viruses -- otherwise, are you going to give them money to get rid of them? In addition, it is NOT very often you actually have a "virus". 95% of the time it's junkware or adware. The number one way to avoid this? Educate yourself on what to watch for, what to avoid, what are safe sites etc. Of course, there is always the possibility of being at the wrong place at the wrong time (which is usually the case with the RCMP Virus). But I haven't had virus protection for 20 years and I have had a virus ONCE in that time. Another point to consider... Most popular virus programs (Avast, AVG, Norton, McAfee, Kapersky) take about 20% of your computers resources. Most of the computers I see in my shop cannot handle a 20% performance reduction. Yes - I'm saying that virus protection programs can do more harm than good! IF you insist on having one, and it's a good idea while you learn what to avoid -- Microsoft Security Essentials is great. It doesn't use as many resources, it's FREE, it doesn't expire. It does JUST as good a job as any of the paid ones - so why pay. By the way - PM me if you'd like porn site suggestions where I have NEVER gotten a virus!!!! :) If anyone ever has computer questions, don't hesitate to PM me, ok? Your sexy geek SP... ;)

I recently started to see ads for Sophie that peeked my interest. Soon after her first ad, she joined our community here on CERB and this made me want to make a connection soon. So this past Friday I saw that she was working, I had to make contact. I emailed her as her ad requests and introduced myself and asked a few question. Sophie promptly replied and her email asked me for my phone number and a time she could call to discuss further. This process is a little different for me, however I absolutely understand her desire for discretion and her process for booking. It doesn't matter how many times I meet a woman I am always a little nervous. Being nervous was short lived though as soon as Sophie opened the door. I was met by this petite sexy woman with a big hug and kiss. Sophie is extremely friendly and intelligent and this led to conversation with her being very easy and interesting. We proceeded to talk for awhile getting to know each other which led to her starting to get playful with some kissing and touching. Now, as for the naughty part of our encounter I won't get into the details. Every encounter is going to be different and of course a YMMV situation. I will say though, that Sophie is very sensual, a great kisser and I absolutely loved exploring every inch of her. Sophie was very adept to my needs and desires and accommodated them perfectly. Sophie works a limited schedule, but I would highly recommend to anyone. I certainly plan on repeat visits as often as time permits. Thank you Sophie for the memorable and enjoyable time. It was an absolute pleasure meeting you and I look forward to much more time spent together.

Unless the client specifically told the sp to let him know when she is going to be back in town, and then ONLY by the method of communication he specified - the answer is always NO. Lots of threads on this too. Not too many things everyone on this board agrees with, but this is the one thing everyone seems to agree with.

Things has been pretty shitty for me lately with my dad who is really sick and other personal things...can I has a hug? or 10?

Well, that was a smashing experience. Jordan is a super friendly girl with a high sex drive. Definitely not a spinner type. But warm, welcoming, and accommodating. An orgasmic experience all around. The most fun I've had in a long time. Say no more....nudge nudge...wink wink...

Of course she can contact me anytime.... phone....text....bbm....drop by the house....after all communication is important. But remember we need to consider my wife so: You are looking for Bond.... James Bond The code words for your in town is "Congratulations you have won a Cruise" to arrange a time to meet say "are you interested in a time share" if you leave a number to call back add one number to every digit of real number. if its about the Duo we were trying to setup just say "there are 3 options for the time share" Wait..... as I think about this.... maybe it would be best to not contact me unless we have set it up in advance. Additional Comments: Of course she can contact me anytime.... phone....text....bbm....drop by the house....after all communication is important. But remember we need to consider my wife so: You are looking for Bond.... James Bond The code words for your in town is "Congratulations you have won a Cruise" to arrange a time to meet say "are you interested in a time share" if you leave a number to call back add one number to every digit of real number. if its about the Duo we were trying to setup just say "there are 3 options for the time share" Wait..... as I think about this.... maybe it would be best to not contact me unless we have set it up in advance.

I am a husband. I am a father. I am a friend. I am a child of God and believes the Lord works in mysterious ways. I am not perfect!!. I am addicted to anything salty. I am the year of the tiger. I am an autumn baby and the sign of Virgo. I am a winemaker and a wood worker. I love olives and grape season. I am a work in progress and always discovering something. I am a fabulous cook. I am a powertool hound. I am often wondering what happens next. I am proof that time heals all wounds. I am living and I am learning. I love thunderstorms and fear losing the people that I love. I am lost without my wrist watch. I am urban and I am an avid outdoorsman. I am a believer that everyone has a story. Mornings are for sleeping in or making love. I am an aviation fanatic, civil and military. I believe in guardian angels and I am thanking my lucky stars. I am a frequent visitor of any hardware stores. I am a perpetual Mr. Fix-it. I am more than just a beast of burden. I am a man of mystery and I have of lot of TLC to give. I am a potato chip junkie. I am a gentleman mechanic. I am happiest when I am behind the viewfinder of my camera. I am a satisfied DIY'er. I can give you the shirt of my back. I am on the information super highway. I am here, in plain sight, even as big as I am, I can still be unnoticeable . I am most comfortable in the kitchen. I am inviting you to enjoy a glass of wine with me. I am a good listener. I am a believer of treating people the way that I want to be treated. I am inspired by my friends. I am trying to let go of memories of situations that took advantage of me, I need to give the overflowing love that I have. I need someone to thirst for the love that I have to give. I need to be appreciated. I need to be listened too. I need to be understood. I need to be held. I need to be spoken to with respect. I need to be reminded of things with dignity. ...and I am wishing you were here..

If you told them it is fine then Yup. If you didn't then Nope. Every lady that knows me or is in contact with me ....whether they have met me or not knows they can contact me 24/7 but that was because of my Okey Dokey. I wouldn't expect it otherwise. There are unwritten rules that are not always followed or are missed because they need to be read between the lines. This is one of them. It is very important to have clarity one on one with each provider and client relationship in my humble opinion.

Sure!!! Sounds like fun :) xo

Absolutely !!! I also love the hustle and bustle of Xmas ....shopping ONLINE from my office where crowds and pushy peeps are not PISSING ME OFF !!!! hehe For all of my family or for my sexy Cerb lady friends that get lingerie to your door..... If I can't get it online I hope you like a gift card ;) haha

Ladies and gents, its now official !! The Ottawa Christmas Social will be held Thursday, December 12th, so mark your calendar!! We are opening the Christmas festivities for 70 members in good standing (35 gents and 35 ladies). Loneskater and I have taken all the comments the attendees have made during the last social to keep improving these events! We are also be holding the festivities at a new venue. Gents, tickets are available at a cost of $35 (payable in person or e-mail money transfer), which will cover snacks, a drink for the ladies and door prizes. You will be kept updated via this thread as things progress. As it's an event organized by and for the CERB community, please contact myself or Loneskater directly should you have questions. Cheers!! MisterT

Even after 25 plus years I never go in my SO's purse or wallet and if she wants something out of either I'll hand it to her. She never looks at my phone and I never look at hers. Peace MG

Rule of thumb for texters is to pass the "Would this be OK if it was a phone call instead of a text?" If the answer is NO or HELL NO, then don't do it. There is no reason why traveling sps can't update previous clients or contacts by pm or email, there are ten dozen reasons why they shouldn't do it by phone or texting. Why people treat texts differently from phone calls is beyond me. The phone rings or beeps. The messsage comes in. It is completely readable to anyone in view of the phone. A phone call comes in. The phone rings. Receiver answers the call. The conversation, on only one side, is open to anyone within earshot. If people can understand what happens in that second case, why don't they understand the reality of sending out texts? Especially blatant and graphic and revealing ones. The sp texting would have been better off with a very basic and generic message, that aren't so obviously sex worker talk.

I think cumshots are super sexy I love watching a man cum I think the hottest is COB Im not into COF, that's just me though, I still think all cum shots are sexy :) Kisses and Stay Sexy xxo

Honesty, there are many times I wonder the same thing, when a client books and confirms and yet cancels last min.... many times over. Sometimes turns out to be legit excuse, and other times, not too sure. Maybe he IS real...maybe NOT... In this case I simply look at the pattern and repetition .... perhaps she is just busy, give it time! Not every lady is full time, sometimes we work our apt around our lives. I know Gent's in PEI who have met her, I can say with 99.5 that she is real.

Gents, I am now down to my last ticket for the Christmas Social!

Great poll idea, Brad. It really makes you think about what's important. And great responses from everyone so far. As with many questions, there is no right or wrong answer. Only what's right for you.

It wouldn't be anything else... You cannot orgasm and urinate at the same time. It is physically impossible ;)

Lots of opinions - even some threads on them: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=146788 http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=153570

Got a call tonight. The boys are talking a bike trip to the rally in Sturgis in August (http://www.sturgismotorcyclerally.com/). Holy crap.....somehow, I am in. Two weeks on the road and likely 8000-9000 kms. Have to start doing squats.......this butt has to get toned up.

Went there on Friday and had a session with Apple. 2 complaints, #1 Apple asked me how much i was tipping her before she even finished the massage and it was way too cold in there. I wasn't even hard therefor turned down the HE, was just too cold.

Sexy fun blue-eyed brunette ready to get down and dirty. Come play with me today and we can get freaky. I love to dominate and have a few sexy surprises that I love to use as well. I love my job and I'm great at it. I am very open-minded and love to play. I am working at Ottawa's most upscale spa in the west end of Ottawa. I'm 5'7, athletic build, perky B36 bust, angelic blue eyes, long dark hair, seductive lips, golden tan, open minded, 100% natural beauty, fun & comfortable to be with... Services: Full Erotic body massage Reverse massage Slippery wet body slides Reverse body slides Hot tub for more intimate session Showers for 2 Domination Duos Fresh towels & linens ATM Cater to fetishes, just ask... Call today to book your appointment with me at 613-820-8887.

When You Love a Woman - Journey

Hi Angela, I have not had the pleasure of meeting you yet, but maybe we could try organizing one with lots of time for a heads up (pun intended lol). About the nature of the party: you're right that classic bukkake is guys jerking off on the lady's face. A variation of course is that BJs are provided, which is what I've organized a few times. This is taken into account in cost. Both parties are equally fun.

I'm sorry but when I read those last two sentences it sounds like something from a prison or mafia movie. Maybe this makes me not a real man but I can think of plenty of situations in life where everyone would have been better off had someone spoken up when they witnessed a wrongdoing. Bullying or assaults certainly come to mind. Things like that continue and cause harm so often because no one does come forward. Now, a spa attendant offering an illegal service may not be at the same level as that, of course, but they are still putting their coworkers, visitors, and owners of the premise at great risk, without their knowledge. If they were doing something illegal that could only hurt themselves you might argue that it was their choice and should be left to them. But in this case if others acting in good faith end up arrested or closed down because someone else was being "a real man" I don't think they'll thank anyone.

I agree too. You should NOT report photos unless you are 100% sure they are fake you could slander or hurt someones business who does not deserve it (and it would force me to suspend you for doing that)

The Dropkick Murphy's from Boston......wicked awesome band!

Best solution? Pick your cause of choicex(FeedNS, Sally Ann, Radio station toy drive) and give them your bill of choice (Blue, Purple, Green, Red or Brown)!

HELLOO GENTS,TODAY I AM WORKING 10 AM-11PM COME UNWIND IN THE SEXIEST WAY..WITH A MASSAGE THAT WILL MELT YOU LIKE LIKE MARSHMALLOWS IN A HOT CUP OF COCOA FIRST VISIT? PLEASE READ A LITTLE ABOUT ME: I AM THE ALL-ENCOMPASSING, ALL EMBRACING M/A WITH AN INCREDIBLE DRIVE.. I HAVE SOFT APPROACH AND MY LAVISHLY SENSUAL TECHNIQUES ARE INCREDIBLY, BLISSFULLY MAGICAL FOR TOTAL WELL BEING IF YOU SO SEEK TO ENGAGE IN THE PURSUIT OF PLEASURE. I HAVE AN UNSTOPPABLE DESIRE TO GIVE AFFECTION.. I AM FAVORABLY, AESTHETICALLY GRATIFYING. I AM PETITE YET BRIMMINGLY STACKED (5FT' - D CUP BREASTS - 100ish lbs) BUT MY PRESENCE AND PERSONALITY ARE LARGER THAN LIFE. AWESOME DIPPED IN AWESOME, COVERED IN SEXY, GIRLIE SPRINKLES, YEP. THAT ABOUT SUMS IT UP! ME IN THE BUFF = YOU LEAVING HAPPY.. FOR THE GENT WHO SO LUSTS FOR THE GRANDEUR AND LUXURY OF THE FINEST AND MOST ELEGANT. YOU WILL HAVE THE RARE PLEASURE OF INSTANT COMFORT IN THE COMPANY OF AN EXTRAVAGANT TREAT. AN ADULT EPISODE WITH ME WILL BE CLASSY AND SENSUOUS, AN EXTREMELY EXHILARATING PLEASURE. LEAVING YOU RICH WITH THE GIFT OF EXTRAORDINARY MEMORIES. THIS IS AN INCREDIBLE CHANCE TO EXPERIENCE PERFECTLY EXECUTED ADULT ENTERTAINMENT. IN MY WORLD YOU ARE ALL VIP'S..LUCKY YOU! FAQ: (*WORK IN PROGRESS) Q:WHAT EXTRAS DO YOU PROVIDE? A:I AM HERE TO GIVE YOU A HAND HOWEVER, I CAN OFFER YOU A NURU GEL MASSAGE AS AN ADDED BONUS! IF YOU HAVE WONDERED ABOUT THIS TECHNIQUE AND HAVEN'T FOUND THE LEGIT WAY IT'S DONE, I OFFER THAT GENUINE SLIPPERY MASSAGE THAT HAS PEOPLE TALKING Q: DO I NEED TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT? A: I APPRECIATE APPOINTMENTS MADE IN ADVANCE BUT CAN ALSO BE REACHED LAST MINUTE. *MORE TO COME.. 613-274-7073 TO BOOK OR PRIVATE MESSAGE ME ENTERTAINMENT IN A RELAXED ENVIRONMENT MY SCHEDULE WEDNESDAY'S 3:30-11 THURSDAY'S 3:30-11 FRIDAY'S 10-11 SUNDAY'S 10 -9 I HOPE YOU HAVE FOUND EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT

Hey, my dildo over the 14 story balcony would always make for a great "Oh shit!" posting in case for those who have never heard about it. lol. I've posted this incident quite a few times on here but it never gets old. lol. I copied and pasted it from another thread.. Here's another one to add to my list of mishaps as an SP...The Demise of Mr. Pink. I was moving boxes one day in the condo I was using and unloaded some out to the balcony to move furniture around. Before I knew it, a dildo slipped out of the box under the glass partition where there was a space. I tried to grab it but too late. Panicking, I was about to look over when I covered my ears for the downfall and all of a sudden heard some guy screaming `WTF`!!`A big pink 10 inch dildo ( exact one as pictured below and who I affectionately named "Mr. Pink") fell 14 stories from the condo building onto some passerby dude head on Somerset St. I'm sure it continued rolling down to Bank St not long after. . Imagine getting hit in the head with the above in public on a busy downtown street in Ottawa!

not me. I've used BP twice and both times have been disappointed by someone very different than the posted pics. any warning here is helpful

CERB is a place that you can ask questions that would otherwise go unasked, and receive frank & honest answers. Where else can someone ask "how do I make my cum taste better"?

I have been told this from other clients, girls soliciting business by text or phone call- so wrong. If a client wants a companion it is for them to contact the sp not vice versa. This shouldn't happen. I don't text and will only return phone calls or emails that instruct me to. So sorry you've had this added stress, absolutely unnecessary!

Not cool at all. I am sorry to hear this. Some just don't seem to understand the idea of discretion. This is a total LACK of it, and the result you experienced is why no one should ever send out a text or phone call without invitation first. Sorry to hear - hope nothing serious happens as a result of this big mistake.

I have seen an "Anastasia" there on occasion, but it is a name that fits a number of the ladies there. Can you give more details as when you last saw here, the shift she was working and a brief description? -Alg

I find it terribly rude-when guys pm you and ask for your availability as they are interested in setting something up-you reply back , provide them with the info they are looking for and then...................Nothing! I completely understand we all have busy lives, and cannot always provide lengthy pms....but a simple not today, that does not work-that right there took me less than 2 seconds to type. Anyhoo-thats all :)

Well I finally made a date with this lovely lady and she was delightful. Very friendly on the phone and arrived at my place in a timely fashion for the short notice I requested of her. She was even able to find an outfit the way I described that I would like to see her in and it was better than I could have even thought of (the stockings were perfect Leigh!). Opening the door was great, she is a very pretty and young looking lady, to me she looks a lot younger than she really is. She changed into that cute little outfit then we got down to the business end. We ironed out the details of what I was looking for from her menu and she was very easy to talk to about this, something an awkward guy like me finds calming. After I decided on a 2 hour session with her she and I engaged in a little pillow talk and kissing rather than a massage as I wanted to try something a little different. Then the fun started! She asked what was my favorite part of an encounter and after I told her the bbbjs she went to town and worked my buddy and his two little friends to perfection. She was also able to get herself off with fingers during this which really helped turn me on more. I then remembered that my favorite part of bjs was actually the after play sucking that can feel really great after a big finish and she was more than accommodating for that pleasure. We went back to some more pillow talk and cuddling (awww yeah I'm a softy) and then eventually went for the gold. Tried a few different positions that were great, and then took another break. She knew my fave was the bjs so started into that again but an old doggy like me can only finish so many times. At this point I swung her into the 69 position and reciprocated as best I could so we took another break and then a little while later she was down there again passionately going at it and really made a grand effort to make me cum again. A little more chatting with this lovely girl and a great big hug and kiss as I walked her to the door. Leigh is a true delight and I will repeat when I am able to. She was well worth it. She is really fun and I enjoyed talking with her very much. She's a true gem and one lovely woman.

Today a cerb member who I'm very lucky to have as a friend needs a big hug. Cometman, I'm not sure if you'll see this any soon but I know you eventually will and I want you to know I was thinking about you today and wishing you all the best :redface:

I had the joy of seeing Leigh this morning. As a nice rise and shine with morning wood. Leading up to the confrontation, she made me feel very comfortable on the phone. As I got hornier and hornier waiting for the day to arrive. As a gentleman I offered her a nice post workout drink before meeting up with her. Also fyi this was just a quicky session. Met her at the door and was stunned and this long legged, beautiful busty woman was. She looked amazing in her outfit. Even without the heel, she had amazing legs. We had some small talk leading and into the bedroom. As I peeled off my clothes, she intervened and asked me if I liked some tongue wrestling. As we flickered back and forth and I enjoyed her plump juicy lips. She started to unbuckle me. Right then it was on like donkey kong. She got down to work with some nice bbbj. It was amazing as her lips wrapped my manhood. I could feel that tongue moving around. I had to grab the back of her head.... I decided to get more comfortable and she was glad to let me. As in this position I was going to be finished...as she changed position and went for some DT. That was it..the curtain call..I told her I was going to explode...she finished me off with a nice hj and cot. I will def see her again..........FO SHO!!

I can't explain me in writing damnitt ! This is a simple quote I always liked and I try my damndest to live my life by... not always possible but I manage to do it most of the time.

Here is a big warm bear hug for Sophia. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Better days are on the way.

Hugs to Sophia. And hugs to Lee and his Dad, too.

I have always said I would up for such an event. Now since I am an SP responding on an escort board, just to be clear I would not feel comfortable participating with a non-pro lady who just does it for fun (with the cost of the room covered). If that is what you are looking for, I suggest trying a fetish site, not cerb. Also in bukkake, it is my understanding that the lady is lavished upon by the guys with their "sauce" as the OP put it, not into giving oral pleasure as well. Please correct me if I'm wrong, as I am open to that, but that would affect the expectation/cost/structure of the party. When and if I decide to do this, it would be cool to do it with another SP, and at such time would post an ad in the advertising forum for FS Escorts. Just out of curiosity, what kind of scenario do you other gents have in mind?