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Once in a while you come to realize that so many of our members really don't "get" the whole hobby experience, or rather, they understand that there are rules but believe they are somehow exempt. So let's help them. Let's give some handy tips to make this a more wonderful experience for all. This is a pleasant place so let's keep it constructive... and be aware that the rules shouldn't just be for clients, you can also add some helpful tips that may help a new provider too! Here goes: 1. Appointment time is at 2:00 pm, what time do I arrive? Ummmmm. Hmmmmm. What part of 2:00 pm is ambiguous? A 2 o'clock appointment means you are at her door at 2. Not 1:55, not 2:10. It's seems petty but when you screw up her schedule, you may be screwing up MY schedule. I may be the appointment at 3. I have things to do... and my schedule may not be as loosey goosey as yours. I may be using a very small window of time or I may have "commitments" that see me arriving like clockwork elsewhere. Regardless, when the little hand is at 2 and the big hand is at 12, be where you are supposed to be. 2. "I am awesomely wicked good in bed, and I often masturbate to pictures of myself nude, because I am that good looking. Can we negotiate a better rate?" In a word, No. Would you go to a restaurant and say, "I am a really good eater, can I get a better price on that steak?" Would you go to a lawyer and say, "I am an awesome criminal, can you represent me for free?" Would you go to the dentist and say, "My teeth are so bad that you should fix them all for $50!" A service provider gets paid at a set rate because she is a professional. She is good... no, not just good... wickedly awesome good, at what she does. Your part is the compensation, her part is the wicked awesome part. Pay the pretty lady and be happy. 3. Cleanliness is next to godliness. Ever step into an elevator and stand next to someone who smells like they have never met a bar of soap they liked? Ever met someone that looked like they were an extra in the Walking Dead? Have you ever gone into a bathroom after someone and wondered if they ate something dead? Step one. Go to the potty. Do your business. Wipe. Wipe again. Wipe again. and then, wipe again. Do the optical test. Last wipe. Is there any residue? If yes, start over. If no, then proceed to step two. Step Two. Shower. Clean EVERYWHERE. Rinse. Repeat. Did you pay attention to anywhere in particular??? Hmmm??? Go back to those places. Make em sparkle. (at this point I do suggest that artificial glitter is NOT necessary.) Get out of the shower. Towel dry (for pete's sake use a clean towel!)... apply a generous amount of deodorant/anti-perspirant. Brush your teeth. (if additional grooming is required, please do that too.) Step three. Clothing. Go to the place where you keep your clean clothes. No. Not the place where you put the stuff that you THINK you can wear again. The CLEAN clothes. You know that stuff that you just took from the dryer and folded nicely?? That's the stuff. Wear that shit. Uh oh... what if I have to do step one again?? Then repeat ALL the steps. Cuz skidmarks are not sexy. Febreeze showers are not acceptable. 4. I have to cancel, what do I do? Give your head a smack. With a hammer. Stop. Now take a pointy thing and stick it with great force into your upper thigh, avoiding the artery. Now, go to your car. Start it. Open the door, put your foot beneath a tire and have someone put that car in reverse. Cancellations? NOT COOL. We all know that shit happens. A death in the family. A sick kid. Decapitation with farm machinery. Thermonuclear war. Explosion of your planet from a death star ray. That shit is acceptable.... but you still owe the pretty lady an explanation AND a cancellation fee. When you cancel, providers don't eat. When providers don't eat they get distended bellies and look like kids from the CARE commercials. When you cancel, providers give not only you, but also your city, a bad reputation. This makes you masturbate more. Because you will never get laid again. Ever. You will over develop muscles in only one arm. Your clothes will fit poorly. People will figure it out and suspect you are the notorious masturbating king of cancellations. They will hunt you down and kill your family. Let's keep little Bobby and Joanie safe. If you make an appointment, keep that appointment. Your family will love you for it. 5. "I'm a little short on cash. Do you think she will notice if the envelope is a bit short?" In a word, yes. She will also point out that your penis is a bit short.... and that your skill level is a bit short... and that you cry like a bitch when you have your pathetic little man-gasm. Do you want that??? Do YOU WANT THAT, bitch??? Wow. That was a bit over-emphatic. Gonna step away from the computer and take a valium. BACK!!!! Where were we... yes. Shorting your provider. Not COOL. Remember, providers have special powers. They communicate telepathically. As soon as you walk out that door, she will know and so will all of her allies in the super friends. They will combine their superpowers and make sure that you never get wood again.... and if you do, it will be at inappropriate times... like at funerals or family gatherings or when talking to your grandfather or something like that. Seriously?? Give your head a shake. If you are short then GET the money and make sure you have it set aside BEFORE you book. You will have a wickedly awesome good time... just pay the pretty lady what you agreed to and enjoy! 6. Can I pay her in drugs? Hmmmm. Does your banker take drugs in lieu of money? Have you offered Rogers drugs in return for their cable/home phone/cell phone/internet bundle? When you get groceries at Loblaws, do they have a special drawer that says "financial equivalent in drugs?" You know the answer. "No, you addled-pated simpleton." Remember the distended belly part from above? Providers take cash because cash buys groceries, pays bills and looks pretty. Carrying cash will not get you arrested. Using cash is the engine that runs our capitalist society. "All you need is cash, cash is all you need." The Beatles sang that, I think. Your turn....

7. I am cleaning. Can we have BBFS sex? Dear M. Delirious, As a fertile woman, still in her sexual prime, I would be delighted to collect, ahead of time, 18 years of child support, and of course, a generous college and university trust fund for our child. Also, please consider the following as part of our contract: marriage, full salary from you when I am on maternity leave, upscale housing and 25 years of above average spousal support for a stay at home mom who enjoys the finer things in life, plus my regular hourly compensation for every time you would like to be intimate with me. If you would like to discuss our future, long-term arrangement, please contact my lawyer for an appointment. If the above is not a suitable option for you, perhaps the following will be: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom Still not interested? Learn about what your potential new friends can bring to your life! AIDS: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HIV/AIDS STDs: http://www.cdc.gov/std/ And here is where you can play Russian Roulette: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=list+of+casinos+in+canada Most sincere and warmest regards, Gabriella xox ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The short answer to the question is... are you fxxxing crazy?!! ;) Happy hobbying!

12. I am Donald Trump's financial manager./I am Warren Buffet's accountant./I wrote the Income Tax Act./I am Sylvester Stallone's bodyguard. I know that I can help make the lady rich beyond her wildest dreams! (or) She'll never be safer, anywhere, anytime, than in my company. Can I offer to trade services? Don't even in your wildest dreams imagine this is appropriate. It isn't. Ever. If she wants your help, she'll ask for it without being prompted. Accept that it's very unlikely ever to happen. Why? you may ask. For the sake of discretion and confidentiality, assume that she's already closer than you will ever be to Donald Trump/Warren Buffet/the entire CRA/Sly Stallone and recognize that the private details of her life, her money and her security are strictly none of your business.

8. Safety first If you are a guy you KNOW that wearing a condom is akin to drinking beer with a straw. It's not as good as without but in the end, it's not that bad. Wearing a condom let's you go home to your significant other and not wear one. It's as simple as that. It also lets your wickedly awesome provider also go home to HER significant other (if applicable) and not have to demand that they wear one. It creates that safe barrier between both of you and the great unknown. The likelihood is that you are both very clean and very safe... but why take the risk??? If I can only make one super serious point in this entire thread, it's this. STDs are ugly. HIV is heinous. AIDS is deadly. Nuff said on dat. 9. Fragrance I know it's aesthetics, but we all like to smell good. Many of us have a particular scent that just works with our body chemistry. Not every commercially available scent is good. Ice Blue Aqua Velva is a manly scent that many of your grandfathers wore to cover the fact that their homes had no running water and that they could only bathe monthly. Aqua Velva, Brut and Hai Karate should not be worn by any man with a birth date after 1919. Bay Rum is used by pirates to kill scurvy and to keep other lonely, lusty pirates away. Anything that you purchased prior to the millennium should probably be used as drain cleaner. Febreeze is not an acceptable cologne. Scent should be used in a delicate fashion. You should be able to smell it only at very close range. Ohhhh... and your twig and berries do not require the assistance of any eau de cologne. No. They. Don't. Spray cologne on your arm. Now lick your arm. Lick it again. And again. And again. And again. Now give that arm a suck... oh yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about.... lick that arm until it gives you the goods... STOP. What does your mouth taste like? That's why you don't spray stuff on your tackle and bait. Ohhhhh... and here's a tip for both ladies and gents: If you are somebody that has sensitivities to fragrance PLEASE let it be known at time of booking. We all want to have a sexy time. Runny eyes, snotty noses and swollen tongues ... not so sexy. 10. First contact. Ohhhh the jitters. You have seen her. She is beautiful. She has two of those, and one of those and a great one of those... she has a beautiful mind, she expresses herself so well.... she's funny!!! She's profound. She's smart. She's perfect!!!!!!! I gotta write her. I have to PM her and ask if we can get together. I went to her website and checked the rates and the menu (like all SMART hobby guys do ;) ) ... and now I am ready to write her. I know what I want... I have the money put aside (thanks for reminding me of that Old Dog!!)... I am .... FUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKK.... what do I write??? Dear Alotta Fagina ... I have a 10 inch meat girder pulsing with lusty intent <THWACK> ... you're right maybe I was exaggerating, thanks for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 7 inch purple python of love poised and waiting for your girl cave <THWACK> ... okay... maybe that sounded a little stalker like, but I do get kudos for being more accurate. Thanks again for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 5.5 inch throbbing man stick just waiting for you to... <THWACK> ... okay... WTF??? Why do you keep hitting me???? Try "Hi Alotta, I saw your website and would be very interested in meeting you next Tuesday afternoon. Please let me know if that works with your schedule! Thanks, Happy Hobbyist." Simplicity works. You aren't writing a Penthouse letter... you are booking with a professional provider. She knows you are interested. She will see your penis. (There I said the penis word. Whooops said it again.) No need to go into goofy graphic detail... plus when you write that stuff, you get that creepy smile and that's frickin' scary ... stop it now. 11. Bacon Sandwiches. Providers - you know it. Bacon sandwiches save lives. It's not necessarily a deal breaker but I think it definitely would be a pot sweetener if you had bacon sandwiches as a mandatory refreshment at your incall. I like mine toasted with lettuce, tomato, mayo and a little salt and pepper. Cut into triangles, but you don't have to cut off the crusts. MegForFun cuts off the crusts for me but that is because she loves me. Bacon sandwiches will improve your business and will put you that much further ahead than providers who only provide ham sandwiches or cheese sandwiches and much further ahead than providers who don't make any sandwiches. Bacon sandwiches just make good business sense. wait there's more.... later ;)

Quite right!!!! No wiener pics!!!! Really guys, your little fella may be your pride and joy but frankly she has seen mine and it is so much better than yours, really. Plus it's a known fact that emailing a picture of your penis decreases your sperm count and by exposing it to the internet, you could get a virus. Not a Trojan virus because you didn't wear one when you snapped the pic... you should have worn a condom... and now you will have cooties. Penis cooties. The worst kind of cooties. Penis cooties eat your penis from the inside out. You'll be standing there with a happy Johnson and one day it will just collapse in on itself. Fall off on the floor. Your cat will drag it away and eat it. Then your cat will die. Your kids will hate you due to the fact that you killed the cat. Your wife will leave you for a non penis emailing man because you are now a eunuch. You will have a mangina. Your mangina won't be of much use either because the cooties will eat that too and not in the good way. You will lose your job and become a homeless, penisless, pennyless, rotten mangina cootie freak. You will probably end up being run over by a bus filled with men who have never emailed a picture of their penis to anyone. And you deserve it.

One minor exception to OD's post is timing, nothing wrong with 5 miniutes prior - must be the military in me many years ago.....

17. The chance encounter You sir, need new socks. Yes you do. The old socks in your drawer were purchased when Gilligan's Island was a new show on TV. Well, Mr. Frugal, you shall treat yourself to a shopping spree... indeed. Sox-a-palooza. You shall purchase 4 new pairs of socks. You might even get daring and buy a pair that is adorned with argyle... maybe even a stripe. You are a sock buying machine. Where to go. Aha! The mall. And that's where it happens. You see her. Alotta Fagina. The woman that rocked your socks off just last week. OHHHH MY GOD. That's Alotta Fagina. But wait. Alotta Fagina is not alone. Could that be... hmmmmm.... it looks like her... yes.... it has to be.... Mama Fagina, Alotta's mom. And that other woman... also seems to look like Alotta... Good Gods... it's Younger Fagina. You see three Faginas approaching you. What do you do???? The answer my friend is... nothing. In this hobby we have all seen Alotta Fagina. We know that sometimes Faginas need a break. You need to understand that the woman you see in that mall is NOT Ms Fagina now... and unless you know each other in some plausible other way (like being a neighbour, a high school friend, her dentist or first cousin <awkward!!!!>), you will not approach. You probably will give her a bit of a lecherous stare, because you still have testicles... but that is where it has to stop. You'd want her to leave you alone when you are with your non-hobby people; respect that she wants the same as you. Go to the food court, order a bacon sandwich and plan the rest of your sock adventure! 18. I am feeling a little under the weather, but I have a stiffy. Good for you! Now go to the interwebs. Get the provider's number. Call her. Tell her that you are a sick little monkey. Tell her that you can't make your appointment but would love to rebook. Send her an email money transfer with a cancellation fee. Go to the bathroom. Get the box of Kleenex, the bottle of Jergens lotion, and a Dristan. Go back to your computer. Find a website with naked people having sex. Apply Jergens. Wait... wait... wait... grab the kleenex. Now take the Dristan and go have a nap. If you are sick, don't book an appointment. If you have already booked an appointment, reschedule when you don't have the plague. Do not jeopardize the provider's health by showing up sick. When you have an appointment and you are sick, you make the provider sick. When you make the provider sick, she might not be showing symptoms and she might make me sick... and that would be bad for the world. You see I am a very important guy. How important??? You know that Tsunami in Japan a year or so ago??? That was me. Some Japanese guy sold me a faulty Sony TV. If you get me sick... I will make sure that you get penis cooties. You have been warned. 19. The Secret Weapon Gentlemen, we all have a secret weapon. If you are ever unsure about who is scamming, who is photo swapping, who is dangerous and who is to be absolutely avoided, there is only one person to turn to... CERB's own Cowboy Kenny. CK is a genius... and he works for all of us.... all of us except for the forces of evil. CK exposes those who would try to exploit our weakness for the female form and at the same time he protects the fantastic women that do a wickedly awesome job keeping us happy. CK is a superhero. Here's his site: http://www.cowboysdiary.info/wordpress/ ... more to come

13. Rescue Me. You are Prince Valiant. You are Captain Courageous. You are a schmuck. You see a provider and become a regular, and then it dawns on you. I LOVE her. I frickin' love her. I am going to rescue that wanton woman from this life of abject misery and make her an honest woman!!!! I will shower her with stuff I can't afford and leave my wife and kids for her... because I know she loves me. She just had great sex with me, didn't she? (it was great for me, and I am sure once she woke up, it was great for her too!) Schmuck. Schmuck!!! Double Schmuck. You let the "fantasy" take hold of your reality and forgot that what you just shared was something that you just paid for. Over there. On the table. In that unsealed envelope. Providers are verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry good at making you feel fantastic - that's what they do, that's the JOB. Whoops did I just say that? Why yes, yes I did. Forget what you see on TV. Forget what the moral majority says in the propaganda. Providers are real women who live in the real world and the job that they perform provides an income. Many providers could blow you away with their talents outside of CERB. They are interior designers, computer programmers, actors, writers, teachers, health care workers, office managers and artists doing this... so if you THINK you know better, think again. Enjoy the fantasy. If she wants you in her life in another capacity, that's her call... not yours. 14. Did I mention bacon sandwiches? Providers - I know I did mention it but I forgot to add that I like it on lightly toasted white bread. Easy on the butter. Remember that well constructed bacon sandwiches will make you rich. 15. The Menu. Now that we are fully aware that ALL providers wishing to be considered to be ELITE will have a supply of homemade delicious bacon sandwiches at hand, please be aware that there is another menu. You know what I am talking about. The menu is there for your edification and for your adherence. In other words, special orders may not be available, or if they are available, there may be an upcharge. If it's not available, it's just plain not available. Don't push for it, don't try to sneak it in there, don't go there. In short, don't be a dick. Now before you get all whiny like a little bitch that fell in the playground and skinned their knee, think. When you took the time to read the list of services available did it say that she had a penguin suit and was willing to feed you like a mama penguin feeds her chick? (really don't think about that, it's kinda gross.) Did it say that she would use a feather duster to clean your place WITHOUT using her hands??? No... it did not. (but if you find one like that, PM me, cuz that would be interesting to see.) In all cases, Your Mileage May Vary. Nobody (except for me because I am special) gets everything they want. Be happy that you get to spend time with someone that special... because she will rock your world with stuff that is on the menu! 16. Appreciate her. You have just spent time with the MOST incredible woman you have ever met. You are walking on a cloud. She just did things with you that you only dreamed about and you pinch yourself to see if this is all a dream. It's NOT a dream. It's REAL. Why not up the ante a bit? I mean she did make you a bacon sandwich for God's sake. She did things with you that you have wanted to do for eons. She smelled amazing. It is not inappropriate to buy her a little gift. Like a yacht. Or a Ferrari. Or a mansion with a suite that I could live in. Okay... forget the yacht. Why not a little something something for her? Check her website. Many will give you ideas of her tastes. Oh... and say thank you. Mean it. Respect her. If she approves of your review, post it. Let her know that she rocked your world. It's late now... I must sleep.... but we are not done... yet.

If I posted anything in this thread and once I got going ( not shooting down other ladies for responding, it's just the way I am once I start bitching. lol), it would be business suicide from there on out. Plus I had my little rant about this sort of thing in another thread. So in keeping my feisty mouth shut, take note hobbyists from Old Dog. He knows what he's talking about as he does have a way with the ladies. Hehe.

Guys, I don't want to come off preachy or holier than thow but it seems lately a common concern that's been expressed to me from a number of Providers, is guys asking for deals or reduced rates, from a ladies posted rate. First off, it's not likely to endear her to your cause, because well it's pretty much an insult, in most cases I'm sure it's not meant as one, but think about it. You want to see a provider based on what you've seen and heard so clearly she appeals to you and you've gone to the trouble of checking out her website or profile and know what she's all about, but you want her to charge you less. How would you feel if your boss came up to you and said you're doing a great job, everyone around the office thinks you're great and we really appreciate the effort you put forward, but we can't pay you for tomorrow... would you mind coming in early though ? Pretty insulting, isn't it ? It's been said time and time again,this hobby is a choice and most certainly a luxury, if you want to see a lady who's beyond your normal price range that you can afford, then plan for it, save up, set a budget. If you really want to meet her and spend time with her, that's the best way to do it. We're actually pretty lucky here, there's a wide variety of providers who range in various affordable price ranges, while some may have a tributes higher than the norm there is usually a reason and they wouldn't be charging anything beyond what the market can bear. I'm not going to make the comparison to cars, wines or other luxury items, because it would be like comparing apples to oranges. The services these ladies provide are incomparable. If you do save up and see to a lady who is in a price range higher than you're used to paying, don't be shy to share with her in your correspondence that you've been saving up and looking forward to the encounter, that is more likely to endear her to you much more than asking for a discount and hey who knows, it might even earn you some brownie points ;) knowing that you saved up for the opportunity to meet.

Just a thought, but IMO it may impact the "type" of person that responds to that ad. If you're looking for mature clients that crave maturity and a connection from the experience it may not appeal to them. They'll be looking for a more intellectual sensual approach (these are the type of clients that are likely to be repeat customers). However, if you're looking for a quick client that's all about the "sex" and cares little about the connection that might do the trick just fine. Really it just speaks to a different class of individual. Again this is just my opinion. I prefer a classy lady that surprises me with the explicit language during the encounter.

With her permission, Katherine has asked me to post this to let everyone know she has not been online and able to answer pms because she was involved in a fire over the weekend. She is doing fine and wanted everyone to know she will be back in Ottawa this coming weekend and able to visit with friends again. Please post any well wishes on this thread so as to avoid her mailbox from overflowing. Katherine, I for one am glad you survived the fire and are alive. A close call for sure. Reminder to everyone to check and maintain your smoke detectors. In this case there could have been a much different outcome. Come back to us soon, Katherine!

You made it so simple and easy to understand! You should become a Hobbyist mentor! Lol Btw loved the cleaningness part! As an MA i get to see many derriers, and looking at a dirty butt crack is a complete turn off!!!! One more that actually happened yesterday or today... not sure.., client i have never met... First time contact.., IT WAS MY BDAY YESTERDAY... DO I GET A DISCOUNT? When you gp buy your bday cake, or a bottle of wine to celebrate do they give a you a discount (yes some restaurants offer you a free dessert.. But first show me your picture ID) ... As mention in previous thread from CK about discounts.., yes if you are someone that i have been seeing regularly i may give you a bday surprise, but do u approach a complete stranger and tell tehm it was my bday.., would you like to give me a gift? Lol My 2 cents :-)

Don't over think things. Get laid. Fuck, suck, lick, stfu and enjoy it. ;)

Save your money boys, 24/7 availability, multiple repeated posts and the kicker red flag of all red flags...... FAKE PICS http://www.yellowbullet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=403552&page=1020 http://www.bromygod.com/2012/10/02/self-shot-tuesday-7/self-shot-tuesday-016-09302012/ http://sexyblock.com/paris-roxanne-is-a-hottie/ http://nafig.net/index.php?newsid=14

If I was 18-25 I might be intrigued by explicit words in a title. Now, I'd much rather see a confident woman who values herself and who wants to connect with me. I find that much more arousing. When you add transparency on top - rates, availability, location, and a real description - then I'm hooked. When I see a lot of "I will not do..." statements, I get turned off. I'd rather leave those parameters for our discussion one-on-one as we discuss a potential meeting. Beyond that, a professional photo goes a very long way to setting a mood. Hope that helps.

I'm used to seeing ads making no reference to voicemail...I've always assumed that it wasn't common practice. Perhaps be explicit in what you want to know when leaving a message.

OD...you crack me up :lol: I always enjoy reading your post and glad to see you back active on here again. Cheers Bud!

O D you are the best ! While I was brought up on bacon sandwiches I avoid them now. However, next time I see you there will be a platter of sandwiches and all for you!! You Rock :icon_smile::icon_smile::icon_smile:

Best. Thread. Ever. :)

lana Lee, angela of ottawa, carrie moon

I'm really enjoying how this season is turning out game-wise. The Shield and Quattro are two very good alliances that I think will go a very long way into the later stages of the competition. I particularly liked how Alec planted the seed in Emmett's mind of eventually cutting Tom loose for his aggressive and hot-headed behaviour. Clearly, the Shield is laying the foundation for power moves further on down the line. One criticism I will make of them is that Peter and Alec are revealing too much about how close they are to each other. I would have suggested that they each fawn upon either Tom or Emmett, suggesting that they make a fake Final Three deal to conceal their true intentions. Getting rid of the non-aligned floaters right now would be my other suggestion. Either get them on side or throw them overboard. It's too early to make any big moves (like taking out Andrew, Jillian or Liza) but taking care of Suzette, Talla, AJ or Aneal at this time would certainly be a wise use of votes. I loved the quotes task that Peter was assigned. It is a great addition to the show and is entertaining to watch. I'm kinda sick of seeing showmances and bromances get air time and I'm glad the production team have included some kind of diversion that makes for good viewing.

lol sunflower seeds today

Good morning sexy boys I woke up feeling extra sexy today, I want to touch tease and treat you. lets play. bedroom baby blue eyes, C cup and slim athletic hard and tight body I offer full nude erotic massage, body slides that will blow your mind and a massage that will melt you like butter. prepare to be astonished. 10-4 west end location

The Executive Floor at the Hilton Lac Leamy has a royale suite with a majestic piano, placed in front a huge window offering a spectacular view on the city of Ottawa. I could not imagine more romantic and fancy setting for your fantasy :)

I don't mean to deflate your fantasy as perhaps there may be someone who may entertain your proposal. But I would think doing that would be a very big mistake for the sp. There is no way you could guarantee that you would not use it in a negative way( not saying that you would) other than a contract set up through a lawyer. Use your memory:), it's more discreet to keep things there.

Glad you're okay Katherine and best wishes to you! While material things can be replaced, it's good to know you're okay which is what is most important! xo

Well thank you so much you guys! I have found a SP who I have been chatting to, and she is making the whole idea seem very comfortable. I am nothing but excited now :)

Happy Birthday Berlin! Enjoy your day!

My only visit to 216 Dalhousie was today.

Hello Gentlemen, -My name is Maya,im a greek olive lol,tanned olive skin, 125lbs,5'3,long curly black hair. -Im an Xxperienced MA,fun,down to earth,open minded -For Rates or more info feel free to contact me Via -Pm or contact number. -Special Rates on 30min sessions! -I offer Duos or single sessions,for Duo please call ahead My weekly schedule Tuesday 4-11pm Thurs 330-11pm Friday 11-11pm Sat 11-9pm Sun 10-9pm Contact number: 613-274-7073 Upscale,Licensed,Private Showers,Free Parking,discreet location. ----Hot New MA ServicesPm me for info!! ----Je parle francais aussi---- Thank you for viewing my profile and hopefully ill meet you soon for some filthy fun Bisou,MAYA XOX Click this bar to view the full image.Click this bar to view the full image.Click this bar to view the full image.Click this bar to view the full image. __________________ __________________ __________________ __________________

I need a hug. Just got the news that my wife can't accompany me to Ottawa next week so getting to watch her get rubbed down by Vitto is off. Bumming very hard right now!

rule #1 Respect the ladies and treat them well.... Rule #2 refer to rule #1

Voicemail would never matter to me, you just need to more cautious in the delivery of your message. As you'd expect real voice is always better than automated, more personal. Plus hearing a persons voice for the first time and placing a voice to a picture is a little exciting in and of itself and I always get a little tingle from it.

Have to say most of the guys that I have had that unfortunate situation of either wanting a discount or see me today pay you next time (lol) is been through other sites where I advertise... But as we have amazing and lovely gentlemen in CERB, every rule has its exceptions... Most providers here I belive somehow always give back somehow, myslef from time to time offer discounted rates not only for frequet visitors but to everyone...to perhaps give a chance for those that may not be able to afford or for those who may think is too expensive, I give the chance for them to come try out and find out what they are paying for.. And show that is all worth.... :) funny story, very little comes from running those special rates, those who have already met me do not care and most of the time even if I happen to give a discount... They give the complete donation... So like in everything there is only a bad few apples, but that doesn't mean everyone is like that! I am very grateful for the gentlemen I have encounter and to be part of a community like CERB!

Very sorry to hear about this Katherine. The most important thing is you are alright. :)

So sorry to hear of this, but the best news is that you made it out ok. Sending positive vibes and hope you bounce back to normal really soon, Katherine! Hugs, FR

Wow so sorry to hear. Hope you are doing well and those things lost can mostly be replaced. Big bearhugs darlin! XO Cub

My family has been through a couple of fires and, in one instance, lost everything material. So glad you're okay, Katherine. Material things can be replaced......you cannot be.

Negotiating, a nice word for it, more like haggling is the ultimate insult. A lady gives of herself in the most intimate interpersonal way providing a much needed escape for us gentlemen The value of the escape and companionship the ladies provide far exceeds any donation the lady would ask for. The ladies deserve respect and appreciation from us. Haggling isn't showing respect and is never called for, it's just an insult RG

Yikes! I am so glad you are ok! Let me know if there's anything I can help with.

You will be busy taking in the sights of her in a skimpy number, she may then crawl over to you and remove her bra exposing her breasts Lightly touching, licking and barely touching her lips heading slowly up your inner thighs, followed by feathering her bottom lip and/ or tongue in unmentionable places. A light smacking of your cock against places nearly insinuating that she may give you what you truly desire, while gently caressing other intimate places..... there are sooo many ways to get a man "ready" without even getting a bj, if this is holding you back from seeing a provider, you need to stop worrying and go have a yourself a good time! I would focus your thoughts more on how are going to avoid being too excited once she is baring herself in the sexiest of lingerie and heels. If she knows what she is doing you will be hers to devour in her secret lair. She may tell you how badly she wants to take you all in.....while she then demonstrates her deepthroat abilities, lastly allowing you to fuck her face (if she does this) Those things and or a neverending amount of other little detailed actions that make any blowjob covered of not a truly unforgettable experience. It's no fun to tell all secrets..... go and experience it. A bj is only one part (in my case multiple times) of an encounter. xo

Sorry to hear this Katherine, hope everything is fine :)

So sorry to hear about this, Katherine and hope you are ok. I realize this has to be tough to deal with but you are strong. Thank goodness it wasn't worse. Take care....

More Roar Please. Slurp.

Come to my beautiful sanctuary and allow yourself to let go. Let me work my magic from your head to your toes. I love to please and long to be your fantasy....with an open mind like mine, who knows what is in store for us! Just lay down, relax, and let me take away your stress.............Take time for yourself and be treated like royalty...YOU DESERVE IT BABY Schedule Mon-8am-10pm Tues-9am-6pm Wed-9am-7pm Thur-8am-5pm Fri-9am-7pm Sat-8am-6pm Sun-8am-3pm Call OR Text-(613)-302-3007

Steve Earle's most famous song is Copperhead Road, a song about bootlegging moonshine Here's a song about the Moonshiner Uncle Tupelo - Moonshiner

I understand you questioning this but providers are not about to discuss their management of these situations in a public forum as it simply gives a client with this intention insight into how to circumvent our safety measures. I gently suggest you find a good agency, learn the ropes, earn your stripes and if you go indie and still have questions you will be granted access to the private area where our important issues are discussed. This game is sold, not told. Let the people making the money off the phones teach you. It's their job... cat

And i'm sure you will love the place (and the company), Lee.

I have limited her posting ability here until this is cleared up.