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Following Cleo's post earlier this month, i'm adding my voice as the other side of the equation (the client's side of course) on Nikki Thomas' show "Sex, Brains and Money". Enjoy!

Interesting discussion and viewpoints, the way I see it hetro, homo, bi doesn't matter to me , we are human and we are sexual, no matter what the prefix. Also as humans we tend to have the need to categorize or classify which is a shame really, what turns my crank may not turn someone elses and vice versa, I don't judge them and I would hope they wouldn't judge me. So long as it's between consenting adults then I'm a strong advocate of whatever floats your boat!

I think you've posted this in the wrong place, Cato... it should be in the "first world problems" thread.... :)

I think that one thing to keep in mind is that most providers who ask for a reference also have alternative screening methods if a reference isn't possible. So it's not quite the roadblock some have made it out to be. I would also say that it is not the case that providers who ask for a reference are not also paying attention to tone, manner, wording, etc. I do not believe most SPs substitute a reference for their own impressions, so I find it odd that it's presented as though there's this dichotomy - either she uses her gut or gets a reference. A reference isn't an excuse not to think for yourself. I'm sure most girls know that. But as to why they would be requested at all, I think that a very good explanation has been given already for why travelling providers use them, but I would also point out that references can be very helpful to someone new to the industry. It's fine to say that we can go by our gut alone, but generally it takes some experience to hone our instinct. Instinct is not some magical talent that some people have, it's not a sixth sense. It is data gathering and pattern recognition most of the time. It takes time to gather enough data to start spotting patterns and figuring out what sounds like a time-waster and who sounds like bad news. We've all interacted with people all our lives so we don't come at this with no data. But for most girls this is still a new way of interacting with people so they need time to learn. In the meantime, references are a second opinion that can help you figure out if your impressions are correct or not. I know that some people are proponents of the school of hard-knocks, but I think in this business the knocks can be pretty hard. For those who are not so new that continue to ask for references, I would simply say why not, if it has always worked for them? For many gentleman, obviously, it is not seen a hoop to jump through so there is no particular reason for them to change a working model. And, as I mentioned, most will offer to screen by more old-school methods if a reference isn't available. But honestly, the whole debate about references only applies to providers who do advance bookings. I don't see how a provider who takes short-notice bookings could ever be expected to contact and hear back from a reference in time. So I think there are just as many valid arguments to be made for not using a reference. I don't think anyone should be judged for using references, as though they are failing to use their own good sense and are making clients jump through hoops, nor do I believe it's ever fair to insinuate that a provider who doesn't require them is being reckless. I also believe that there are reasons a provider would choose not to give references as a policy. I won't go into them in detail, some have been mentioned, but I don't think it's really necessary to defend. CERB is very positive and I love that things can be discussed and debated but I get a bit frustrated, or maybe dismayed, to see people put down for their preferred (and effective) methods of screening a client.

Well don't know if this is things that suck or something good, well not good, dad still has leukemia. But the doctors were originally wrong, he doesn't have pneumonia. That's the good news. Bad news, he has fluid in his lungs, which is why the mis-diagnosis. Bad news. Good news, they can drain the fluid, meaning he can start his chemo sooner. But he had a stroke a few years back, and is on coumadin. He has to be off the coumadin for five days before the fluid can be removed. Hopefully there are no side effects from being off the coumadin for five days. But he can also get started on the chemo once the fluid is removed, which means sooner than later. So still worried, don't know if this is good or bad news RG

I've been with men,women and t-girls. I'm heterosexual. Sex is just that sex. Enjoy it. It if feels good do it.

Surprised Mod has not interrupted his weekend to solve this "first world problem" :icon_lol: Interesting but don"t have time to add another 901 friends to see this issue first hand! :icon_lol:

I am 100%independant and have always been. I do not require references as I find my own gut reactions never lead me astray. That being said, if a client wishes to use me as a reference I have absolutely no qualms in providing him one. 2 seconds is all it takes to answer a simple question :)

kick her to the curb??? ridiculous hoops??? I'm sure statements like that raise warning flags with the ladies. Likely it's guys like you that are the reason ladies require verification and references. Ladies are deserving of respect, and I certainly do not see any respect for the ladies coming from you with that post. You could say you chose not to see ladies requiring references without bashing those ladies who do require them RG

Because in life there are more important things than money... In this lifestyle, safety is always priority number one for most of us. Jumping through hoops? lol How difficult can it be to say "I saw xxx a while ago. Here is her contact information"? Sounds pretty easy to me.

Hi I've been a member of cerb for over two years now. and have read the posts of these women almost every day and have the opportunity to meet a small selected few of the women in Ottawa. It is with heartfelt thanks to my appreciation to the kind caring women of Cerb that post and contribute their opinions and advice to us men. I admire these women as they offer their services without discrimination to men of all sizes, races, disabilities. All the ask is that you are a gentleman and are clean. They offer companionship, sometimes friendship to lonely men, widowers and virgins. For a short time the man can feel human, or needed again. Some men are shy and lonely. This gives them the chance to be with a woman that he can only dream about, the girl from school that was out of reach. Or they can fulfill a fantasy. Sometimes they can keep a marriage going by providing the sex that is needed in a sexless marriage. I just wanted to show my appreciation for the services and companionship that they offer. And I am sure that other members of Cerb feel the same way. If so let's here from other Cerbies :) Yours Someguy

C'mon, I know you have at least one! Here is one of mine: Tina Fey as Sarah Palin http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owT_BNutAU8 For those who are a fan of Chef Gordon Ramsay and his show "Kitchen Nightmares", this one's funny!

I am having a hard time biting my tongue on this issue....

Not at all... I thought it was great!

Actually, it does make sense. Keep in mind the Subject and read it as if someone were literally writing English but thinking in another language. Many CERB-tites start from another language than English and occasionally interesting anomalies appear in their postings. Part of what makes the whole CERB experience as charming as it is. Carry on...

I know what your saying. At the end of the day its the quality of service you pay for. And Tessa you are amazing, beautiful and sexy. Keep up the effort as you did with me and no guy will have a problem with becoming your regular. You are a gem.

I'm guessing its about keeping her previous rates which are more expensive then some other providers or lowering them. Posted via Mobile Device

Am I the only one that doesn't have a clue what that meant.

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My first experience was with an independent SP early in 2010 and it opened my eyes to the reality of this industry. It was good enough to ensure that I would come back. After three decades of being faithful to my wife and three years of celibacy when our physical relationship ended I stumbled onto CERB and carefully (oh, so carefully) selected a well reviewed, mature provider. She responded very quickly to my emails and I set up a meeting at an Ottawa hotel. I have to drive to Ottawa from where I work and when I was about 30 minutes away she sent a text message saying that she had to switch hotels. I didn't know Ottawa at all at the time and I didn't have a GPS or a smartphone so that almost scuppered the whole thing right there. I stopped at a mall to find a public telephone and a phone book (surprisingly hard to do these days) and was on my way again. Then, when I arrived and texted from my car in the parking lot, she responded by telling me that the elevator required a room card and she would come down to the lobby to meet me at 2 minutes before the hour. I went in at about 3 minutes before the hour and imagined that everyone at the front desk and in the lobby was staring at me for what seemed like an hour (but was probably more like 2 or 3 minutes). She arrived and I got into the elevator with her and another gentleman. This was the moment I was completely hooked. We didn't speak but the mischevious smile she kept secretly flashing my way was too much to bear. We got out at our floor and she signalled me to remain quiet until we got into the room. The door closed and I saw that the drapes were drawn, there were candles glowing and low music was playing. She turned to face me and gave me a warm, welcoming hug and kiss. She was very attractive and was wearing a simple, cute dress which was just very slightly shorter and tighter than you might expect to see in the afternoon in Ottawa. I am not model material but neither am I insecure about my appearance. She, however, was tanned and fit and a natural blond with beautiful blue eyes. I could see I was punching above my weight and it made me just a little bit more nervous. This was difficult to do because I was already about as nervous as a human being can be without passing out. I had booked for 2 hours because I knew that I would need some time to settle in and I didn't want to rush. We sat on the couch and I opened the wine I had brought with hands so shaky that at one point she stopped me, held my hands, and tried to reassure me. Finally we were at the point where I was most relaxed - chatting. I love to meet people, hear there stories, find common ground, find how their lives are different, exchange views. As we talked I relaxed a bit but was still too nervous to initiate anything. After 15-20 minutes she finally figured out that I was a bit stalled and thankfully took things into her own hands. While talking she had punctuated her sentences by touching my shoulder or leg but now she slid a bit closer, caressed the back of my neck and gave me a soft kiss. I had told her of my situation and all through the conversation I had imagined that she had a slightly bemused look playing across her face. Later she admitted that she had found my nervousness 'sweet' and 'endearing'. Thank goodness for that - I was expecting it to put her off. In any case, the kiss was enough of a wake-up call for me and the encounter entered its next phase. It is always difficult to guage how one comes across in bed with an SP. They always make it all about the client and we are 'always' excellent lovers. However, I could tell that I was occasionally awkward because I was so rusty. She never complained or even commented and the whole experience was wonderful. The session was alternately energetic and languid and I loved it. At the end of the 2 hours we were draped over each other on the bed sharing jokes and laughing while I caressed her body. Since I was enjoying myself so much and I was new to this I didn't notice I had gone overtime for 10 or 15 minutes. Luckily she was free and she didn't say a word until I noticed. I thanked her and went on my way a new man - with a new plan. I saw her a number of times until she retired about a year and a half later. I have had sessions since then which were more intense, more adventurous, sweeter, and sadly ones which were just terrible. However, this first one will stick with me.

Here's the result of some poll or other of the 10 sexiest female singers. It has Shakira as number one, then Brittney Spears, Katy Perry, down to Gwen Stefani at 9 and Pink as number 10. What do you think? http://inmusic.ca/video/?bclid=1064083772001&bctid=1994827047001

First off withpassion expressed his view on the topic and he should not have been disrespected for that though he could have chosen better wordings. That said, I don't agree with his statements. It is not a safe world out there. There are plenty of unsafe or violent people, who are seeking victims. If you don't believe me read Ottawa Citizens every day there are people being charged with crimes or go to jail as a result. Safety and security in an important issue and a right for anyone at any profession, including providers. If some providers chose not to seek references that is their business but others who do, then must be provided. For God's sake I can't understand why anyone would refuse to provide references if she asked for, when the important issue of a colleague's safety is concerned but again your choice, not my business as why and if that is what you wish, by all means I respect your choice. Ladies who are usually physically weaker (do not attack me I am a complete believer in total gendre equality. They may be physically smaller but have bigger hearts and minds to make up for it) are walking into a total stranger's home in a totally unknown environment or inviting a total stranger they have never met or heard of into their homes or being alone with him in a hotel bedroom. Don't you think they are taking enough risks already? If you are a newbie, then maybe start by seeing those who do not seek references but answer their questions honestly and i am sure there will be plenty of SPs who will see you. And then once having references, provide them when you have one. Do you not want for the lady you are about to get so intimate to feel safe and have an equally good time?. How can she have a good time if she is worried about her safety? what is the big deal about providing references if you have one? References can also be an agency you have seen a provider from. I have in the past provide PKE (who are here on cerb) as my reference as well as cerb providers. All above said, though in the past I have gladly provided references, though have refused to provide my full name (goes against the principles of discretion also important for hobbyists) and would have refused providing pictures (again goes against discretion) if I was asked for (never asked though) as I don't see how a picture can act as a safety measure, though always given the option to the provider to leave with her transportation fee paid if she didn't like what she saw upon arrival.

Cheryl Cole - Brit but damn sexy :icon_wink:

I have to agree with Sara. Sexual identity (or preferences) is defined by the person, not by someone else or an agreed upon definition imo. While i consider myself heterosexual, the opportunity had presented itself many years ago with the right person but, regrettably, didn't take the opportunity (but was certainly seriously considered). Unfortunatly, that particular person is no longer around. Would i? Certainly, were the circumstances be right.

Emma Hewitt definitely turns me on bigtime!!! Also have a thing for Becky Jean Williams of Late Night Alumni and Kaskade ...and of course Leila Moss from The Duke Spirit!!!!

Yes; there's a profound difference between an act and an orientation. In fact, in gay porn (or sex work more broadly) there's an entire population of men and women who are 'gay for pay'. They maintain romantic relationships with the opposite sex/gender, but are willing to interact sexually with the same sex/gender for a certain amount of money.

I think your question confuses the act or action and a typing of the person. So yes a man may engage in a homosexual act and still not"be" a homosexual. Of course, another answer might be " who cares?"

I agree, I love having friends with benefits! It's how I spend my living

There has been a bunch of newbies recently. Let's here some of your stories. this thread was getting interesting. I'm sure we would like to hear more stories :)

I like my weekend so far. I did a photoshoot yesterday, cleaned out my cupboards, and saw a friend. Today I heard from someone I had not spoken to in a long while who I missed dearly. Later I will watch Lord of the Rings. I look forward to finding out what happens next.

I love having friends with benefits ! It's how I make a living :boobies:

This does sum things up nicely, and I also don't require references. It isn't necessary for how I screen or how I do my own bookings, etc. I also agree that if other sps do require references, that is cool, I understand there are a few reasons. For me personally, the safety issue seems to be paramount when the discussion comes up, but to me that is the least of the reasons for references. For one thing, like getting a phone call from an unblocked # versus a blocked one it sets up a false sense of security on that issue. To me, compatibility and our conversation help me decide if I am going to see a new caller or not. I wouldn't ask for references, nor will it be that important to me if he has them. HOWEVER, I would never, if asked, refuse to give one to another sp if the client contacted me and asked if I could do that. I would NEVER consider that what I do is all the work for those reference requiring sps so that they can have a safe encounter. But then I don't really consider that 'safety' is the number one issue for needing references, and I assume that at least half of the most important reason is elimination of time wasters. And that is important to everyone, imo. Just because some sps require references, and some don't, doesn't make either one better than the other. As one client points out, an sp's refusal to provide them takes her off his list. Her not requesting them at all puts her on someone else's list.

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It would be nice if bp had an option to buy more letters, I always have to remove half the ad I create due to their letter limit, I would have no problem paying a bit more to not abreviate nearly every word on my ads. I doubt you creeped anyone out if you treat the ladies as you have mentioned. I myself have a made a few rather large slip ups regarding appointments. (Usually due to jotting it down somewhere random and not putting all in one place) and also when I was moving from hotel to temporary rental and again to an apartment. This is something I have been working to fix, to prevent doing so again.

Sadly no. But I'm open to it. Ladies? Any volunteers? lol

There are many nice ladies to choose from here on cerb, why then keep trying your luck with another site that you are not having a good track record with? I just ask this in the most sincere way, as I am forever seeing this type of thread from all kinds of hobbyist and really get confused why they simply dont choose someone from here, when you can clearly see cerb has the tools for you to use for your inquiry into a lady's reputation and such? If I went shopping for clothing at a store, and their cloths kept falling apart on me, then I will shop at a store at a that will sell me cloths that are quality made, good service and reputation of having better cloths.

To Cowboy Kenny: All dogs can talk. But not all humans listen.

There is no right or wrong way in how an SP decides to go about screening. Personally, I come from the old school way of doing things as well and at the end of the day, a reference just isn't enough for me since it can be a false sense of security imo. One experience with an SP may differ from the next with the same client. Instead, I prefer to go with my own instincts which have proven to serve me well. I will engage the potential customer in a phone call to gain some insight since I do not like booking by email which is too anonymous for me and I don't like booking days or weeks in advance. However, I don't fault others who do ask for references as a way of screening and am happy to provide them. Sharing info is always a good thing. Every SP does it their own way and we all have to respect that. If someone doesn't agree with it, there are plenty of other SPs around that have a different approach of rather than asking for references.

Am I the only person who's now gong to go through the boobs thread and categorize them all? Purely in the interests of science, of course... :)

The Canadian Escort Recommendation Board made a huge difference in my life. When I started escorting I had no idea what I was doing and CERB provided me with a safe space to explore this new chapter of my life. I meandered my way through the various threads and met some amazing people who helped me along the way. I remember joining CERB and only taking my first appointment after 2-3 months, and then I only made my first website about 6 months after that! It's been a learning curve for me. I think CERB is a great marketing tool, especially for posting threats and having conversations with new patrons, or maintaining conversations with ongoing ones. I'm sad that I've had less time to post because of my studies, but happy when I can find a couple of moments (like now) to tell the community how much I love and appreciate them. I meet patrons all the time that change my life in some way. I think we are all shaped by our interactions and I always learn something new about life when I meet someone. It can be something small, or something much larger, it really depends on a multitude of factors. I think CERB provides me with a medium to meet a lot of really interesting people that I wouldn't have otherwise met, and we shape each other through the intimacy and joy we share. It feels rather indiscreet and private to discuss particular heart warming stories publicly, but I think it's easy to understand what I mean without substantiating it with examples. I think we all reach other to each other in special ways, and I'll probably remember a lot of these experiences for the rest of my life.

I am very vocal! I'm a big moaner. :) And I love a man who talks dirty to me. Nothing turns me on more.

It has been a while since her last nomination. But the young, beautiful, sexy, adorable princess in the name of Peachy has continued to be a part of cerb and a very valuable contributing member. Personally, she has the biggest impact in my hobbying experience, and I could say, she's one of the most influential persons in my life. And for that, I cannot thank her enough. So, my Cerb goddess of the day nomination goes to the well-deserved -- Peachy. Here is the lovely princess or goddess - [/url] And here -

I've never been a fan of the popular pretty boys... I certainly enjoy a wide variety of men, but have always had a little thing for the unkempt, rough and scruffy look. Gerard Butler definitely does it for me. Masculine features, casual kinda dude with a great sense of humour, and of course that accent doesn't hurt either. Yum.

I visit regularily now, I am friendly and open minded so please look me up and get better aquainted with me. www.escorthalifax.com Katherine xo

I find all of this very disappointing to read. It bothers me because it almost insults the rest of us. Whether we like it or not, people generalize. And if SPs in Winnipeg have a reputation of being flaky, non-commital, unavailable, unfriendly, scammers, rushers and overall unprofessional, then its going to reflect negatively on the rest of us. I take what I do for a living very seriously. I chose to do it, with 2 university degrees behind me. It didn't matter. I regularly apply my business acumen to my choice of career and I pride myself on the level of friendliness and professionalism I consistenly maintain. And it isn't always easy, either! lol To those who constantly disappoint, won't pick up their phones, refuse to provide advertised services and so on, shame on you all. This is a business ladies, and your number one priority should always be your client. Try and put yourself in their shoes for a moment. Would you appreciate driving hours into the city, having made an appointment for some fun, to find you're being avoided/stood up? Not a good feeling. Or what about posting photos of yourself that are clearly not of you, or are completely out of date? How can any of you be at all surprised when a client is clearly disappointed with how you really look? False advertising is illegal in most other industries, as it should be in this one. Oh! And let's not forget the young and inexperienced ones who come onto the scene out of nowhere and start demanding $300 an hour. I think those have to be my favourites. :roll: Anyway, my advice to the plethora of SPs available in Winnipeg (more than in any other city), is to try a little integrity. It goes a long way. If you behave unprofessionally, you will be found out, in one way or another, so why even bother? Just because you have a digital camera, a cell phone and an internet connection, does not necessarily qualify you to call yourself a Service Provider.

Seymour, two things: 1. quitting the hobby, that may be possible, but it is in our instincts to pollinate all the flowers of the world :), may as well have fun doing it. So possible, but difficult, and as Boner says, the ladies are addictive. Worse than cigarettes. 2. quitting sex, sweet and short, cut it off, that will do it, there is no other way :)